“You did what? He doesn’t need to know that, Suz. I’m a big enough wreck as it is without throwing our past into the mix.”
“He’s your husband,” Suzie argued. “He should know the nitty gritties about you, if you guys want any kind of relationship.”
“I’m not so sure he wants a relationship.” Hard as she tried, she couldn’t get past the way he refused to talk to his ex-fiancé in Adelie’s company and instead took the call at a far enough distance away he didn’t notice her leaving.
“Clearly, he does. Now the question is, what are you going to do about it?”
Could she believe it? Did he really want to be closer to her? To have an actual relationship with her instead of a protective, bodyguard kind of a marriage?
“Let him in,” Suzie encouraged. “You never know. You might get hurt. Or you might hit the jackpot like I did with Fletcher.”
Adelie wished she could hug her sister. “Thanks, Suz.”
“You’re in the most romantic city in the world. Look at all the things he’s done for you, not all the ways it could go wrong. Remember the good and discard the rest. You can’t go through life focusing on the ways people might let you down. He’s already done so much to prove all of this to you, Adelie. Don’t betray yourself out of fear.”
Suzie’s final words resounded like a battle cry in her mind.
Don’t betray yourself out of fear.
Hindsight widened to become panoramic in her mind’s eye. She’d been so stupid. Suzie was right—Maddox had done so much for her. He’d shown her only kindness. Even in moments of frustration, like with his ex calling, like when she’d left him on the bridge, Maddox had kept his temper. He hadn’t lost control of himself like her father would have done.
He’d put his entire life on hold to protect her. The reality of that slammed into her with sudden force.
“Oh, my goodness,” Adelie said. If she wasn’t careful, she could push him away, and that was the last thing she wanted.
But she couldn’t just let every barrier she’d built down at once.
“You know I’m right, don’t you?” Suzie said smugly.
“Suzie, you’re the best. And I have to go.”
“Yep. You do.”
“Bye, Suzie. Thank you so much.”
Adelie’s sudden optimism was off-putting. It didn’t match how forlorn she’d felt for the better part of the evening. She shook her head, hoping Maddox wouldn’t fault her for the whiplash of emotions she was dealing with. She also hoped he was still awake. Steadying her breathing, she opened the door.
Maddox’s couch-bed was pulled out and roughly made. He sat against his pillow, in the dark, staring at the Eiffel Tower’s sparkling majesty through the window. It glittered and gleamed like nothing Adelie had ever seen before.
“Maddox?” she said gently.
He peered back at her.
She took another step toward him. “I hope this comes out okay, but can I stay with you in here tonight? Just to be close? I don’t want to be alone, and—” She wrung her hands. “And I think it might be good for us to talk.”
Wordlessly, he offered her a hand, and she took it, sinking onto the mattress beside him.
“It’s really stunning, isn’t it?” he said, returning his attention to the Eiffel Tower.
“It is.” She was mesmerized by its fantastic sparkle, by its ability to point upward and shine with never-ending confidence. Adelie knew it was only a building, but in her current mood, a deeper insight struck her. In a strange way, she saw herself reflected in it.
It was almost as if, with every new glow, the Eiffel Tower gave Adelie permission to be a light as well. To be herself—her real self—no matter who she was around.
Maddox’s arm slid around her, and she nestled into his side, allowing her head to rest against his shoulder. In the warmth of his embrace, the proximity, and prodded on by his heartbeat, Adelie saw herself in that magnificent structure.
She was different. Meant to stand out and be beautiful. She didn’t want the praise of others, but it was okay for her to be seen. To glitter and gleam, to be unrelentingly herself.
“I keep thinking about you on Wonderland’s brand. I really do think you’re the perfect Alice,” he said.
“You saw something in me that I didn’t see in myself.”
He faced her, brushing her knee with his. A hand stroked her cheek. “I only saw what everyone else has. What I want you to see too. That you are amazing and special. That you deserve every good thing life has to offer.”
Keeping his hand around her, he lowered himself to the pillow beside the darkened, open window. Adelie’s muscles were supple and willing. She lowered herself to face him, resting at his side, keeping her ear to his chest to hear the steady thrum of his heartbeat.
Maddox cradled her hand in his near his sternum as he rubbed soothing circles along her back. “Suzie told me about your dad.” His voice was calm.
She nestled in closer. He was so safe, the safest she’d ever felt before. She liked his company, the assurance of his arm around her, of his masculine, no-nonsense voice rumbling in his chest. He gave her the sense that no matter what happened, she could face it with him.
“I know. She told me.”
He rotated, resting his hand at her waist and lying on his side beside her. His feet tangled with hers at the bottom of the bed. Darkness looked good on him. It accentuated the line of his jaw and nose, deepening the intensity and softness in his eyes, which stared directly into hers as though nothing else existed.
“And you’re okay with me knowing?”
Adelie scooted away. She’d never lain this close to a man before, and this man was her husband. “I am. Everything happened so fast between us, I—I don’t know. I guess it never came up.”
“I’m not sure there’s any easy way to share something like that with anyone,” he said. “You didn’t owe me the explanation, but I’m glad I know.”
She propped her head onto her elbow. “You are? Why?”
“Because I feel like I finally understand. I want you to know I’m a good person, Adelie. I—” He closed his eyes. “The idea that anyone could do what your dad did to you boils my blood. I wish I could take that away from you. I want you to know I’d never—never—do that to you. Or to our kids.”
Adelie blinked. “Our—kids?”
“You know. Should we have any.”
The warm cocoon that had settled around them burst. Adelie sat up. She wasn’t sure how to process her confusion. “Then you—you’re saying you want this to be a permanent thing between us?”
He sat up too, resting his weight on one hand. “I think it’s something we can talk about. I’m open to that. What about you?”
“I—I don’t know.”
“What do you want from me, Adelie?”
She looked directly at him, ready to be her bold, new self. “I want you to mean what you say.”
“I do.”
“How…” Her voice broke. “How can I believe you?”
“Why don’t you?”
“You’ve been pushing me away since we said our vows. There have been moments between us where I think you’re genuinely into me, but then right when I think we have a connection, you push me away.”
She needed to be blunt. They had to have this out.
“I’m sorry,” he said, brushing a lock of hair away from her face. She gazed into his night-shrouded eyes, and the gleam there shouted with sincerity.
“After the way those men treated you in Coleman’s, I was trying to show you I would never force anything on you. I never meant to hurt you.”
His admission circled in her chest like steam rising from a warm mug of cocoa. Her joints melted like wax.
He scooted closer. “I think I know a way that might convince you that you can trust me. I want to take things slow. But being here with you now, having you this close to me and seeing the way shadows are dancing on your skin, makes me want to kiss my bride.”
/> “Maddox.” Her voice was as weak as the rest of her body.
“I promise, I won’t push you to go farther than you’re ready to. If you’re not up for that, then I just want you in my arms. But I think sometimes kisses have a way of speaking to the heart in a way nothing else can.”
“You’re not saying this because I’m your Alice, are you?”
He scooted closer still. His hand slid to her waist, and he pulled her onto his lap. Adelie gasped at being this close to him, being held by him in the darkness, having him touch her so intimately and look at her with such desire.
“You’ll always be my Alice,” he whispered. “But I’d want you even if you weren’t.”
She didn’t protest this time but, instead, sensed every sliver of movement he made as he inched toward her. The way his heat radiated through her frame. The press of his chest against hers. The beat of his heart, the pulse of his fingertips on her jaw, gentle, so gentle. The last-minute gleam in his gaze and the moment his eyes closed just before his warm breath struck her, before his lips parted just enough, the perfect distance, to fold themselves over hers.
Their soft feel ignited awareness across her entire body. His arms tightened around her, enfolding her in a layer of safety and desire. The kiss was deliberate and slow and ended too soon before he pulled away to gauge her reaction.
She met his every glance, and he took it as the invitation it was. His head angled, his hand slid up to her neck, and he guided her back to his mouth, kissing her more insistently this time. Every motion was a flutter in her chest, a spark in her mind, and a promise. It seeped in a trickle at a time, until it filled her to the brim. She was wanted. She was safe. He’d meant what he’d said—he was like no other man she’d ever met.
Gradually, the kiss slowed, and she sat on his lap, cradled close to him, as they watched the Eiffel Tower continue its glistening, silent lullaby.
“Now do you believe me?” Maddox said moments later.
She rested her head against his shoulder. “I don’t want to be alone tonight.”
She wanted as much of his attention as she could get. She wasn’t ready to consummate anything—that kiss was enough for now. Baby steps, just like Maddox had said.
Rather, she yearned for the emotional support he was giving her. She’d never experienced anything like this. It wasn’t just the kiss. It was the promise that he was there for her. He was the shoulder she could lean on for support. And she wanted to be that for him too.
Maybe this was what love—what marriage—was all about. Being there for one another, in whatever way the other person needed.
“Then stay,” he said, holding her once more. Just holding her. And it was perfectly enough.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Sunlight gave gentle nudges to Adelie’s subconscious. Her body was warm and heavy, comfortable and relaxed in every way it could be. The blanket covering her, the pillow beneath her head, Maddox’s arm around her…
Maddox’s arm…
Her eyes shot open. She clasped her hands to her chest, frozen. His warm, strong hand rested on her stomach, while his soothing breath stroked the back of her neck. Memories of their conversation—of their kiss—from the night before flurried around her like a snowstorm, though they were anything but cold.
Maddox Hatter, billionaire owner of Wonderland Theme Park, had kissed her. She’d had her first kiss, with a guy more amazing than she could have ever hoped for.
And she had fallen asleep in his arms.
Disbelief overwhelmed her. She rolled slightly to her side, praying the motion wouldn’t wake him, and took advantage of his slumber to examine every inch of his handsome face.
His long lashes brushed chiseled cheekbones. Slight signs of aging lined his tanned forehead and near his eyes, just enough to be brushstrokes on an otherwise perfect canvas. She wasn’t sure how old he was; in his thirties, she would guess.
His lips parted, and Adelie found herself entranced by their shape, by their fullness and the memory of how they’d felt against hers. Invisible hands guided her nearer, tempting her to press a new kiss there now, a surprise kiss. A morning kiss.
Adelie hovered, allowing the image to faze her before she thought better of it. Overcome with emotion, she slipped carefully free of his lax embrace and tiptoed to her own room. The floor creaked, and she winced, hurrying to close the door so she could have her own space to process everything that had happened.
Sinking onto the bed, she stared at everything and nothing while her heart chugged in her chest. What was going on here? She’d never felt this way for anyone. This stirring newness, the sense that a version of herself was surfacing, one that could only be accessed by Maddox and would only be truly seen by him.
She was lighter inside, fairly flying with all the excitement of it, with the realization that, at least for a moment, she’d been precious, wanted, and loved.
Carefully, slowly, she lifted a hand and stroked her bottom lip. Her mind couldn’t completely make sense of how such a thing as a kiss could manage to imprint itself into everything she was, the direction of her blood flow and the strength in her muscles. It was artistic, the way it took the mold of her and reshaped her completely, into someone brighter. Was a kiss like this every time?
She had to talk to Suzie.
Morning Suz, she texted. Any crazy men attack last night?
Hundreds. Boyfriend did kung fu. You should have seen it. Of course, the house is a wreck now. There’ll be no living here after this.
Adelie laughed as her hair swooped and created a curtain between her and the window. She hugged the phone to her chest.
That’s okay, she replied to Suzie. I’m not sure I’ll ever leave now that I’m here.
Paris is everything you dreamed it would be?
That and more, Adelie replied, knowing there was no way to tell her just how much.
She started to text Suzie about her adventure the night before. Her romantic conversation with her new husband, the way Maddox had held her like an exquisite jewel, the way his lips had felt like the velvet skin of a peach against hers.
This wasn’t something she could send in a text. It was extraordinary, breakable, not meant to be thrust out without care the way the rest of their playful conversation was.
She’d tell Suzie the next time she saw her.
Adelie decided to get dressed. Where before she would have just thrown on the first thing her fingers found in her suitcase, now, she flipped through what she’d packed, selective about her attire more so than she’d ever been for any job interview.
She opted for a coral shirt with khaki pants. After talking to herself in the mirror for several minutes, she mastered the nervous hammering in her chest and opened the door.
Maddox was sitting up in bed, skimming through something on his phone. Adelie slowed. She’d been caught staring and didn’t mind in the slightest. In fact, Maddox seemed just as pleased to see her.
“Morning,” he said, blinking at her. Was he wondering why she wasn’t still with him? “You look incredible.”
Blushing, Adelie ran a hand over her hair. “So do you.”
He laughed and offered a hand in her direction. “Come here.”
Adelie treaded toward him, preparing to settle on the bed’s end. When he didn’t lower his hand, she followed his lead, not stopping until her hand was in his and he cradled her against his chest.
“Did you sleep well?” he asked.
His smell of musk and sleep numbed her. “I did. Thank you for last night,” she added. “You don’t know how much I needed that.”
“Are you talking about that kiss? Because that’s all I’ve been able to think about since I woke up.”
She chuckled. “That was…Yes. I guess that’s part of it. You were my first kiss.”
Maddox pulled away so he could look at her. “You’re kidding, right?”
Her timidity threatened to take center stage, but she brushed it aside. “I’m really not. It was so special. I
t was like I was sharing my soul with you, and you saw me for who I really am. And that you’re still okay with that.”
Setting aside the blanket they’d shared, he rose from the bed and stopped before her, tipping her face to meet his. “I am. And once I brush my teeth, I’d like to kiss you again.”
She giggled, whacking him with a pillow.
“Hey,” he said. Defensively, he gripped her wrists. She giggled again, wriggling, attempting to free herself from his grasp. He bowled her over onto the pull-out bed, and the two of them tangled in the blankets like birds in a nest when his phone on the table beside it buzzed.
Freed from Maddox’s grasp, Adelie rolled over and inspected the screen. All at once, the morning’s elation died. Ruby’s lovely, pouty expression filled his screen.
“She’s calling you again,” Adelie said. “What did you say to her when you answered yesterday? Did you tell her you’re with me?”
Maddox scowled and reached for his phone. “Not yet. I’m just not sure how. Ruby can be a little territorial.”
Adelie sat up. “Even if you aren’t her territory anymore?”
Or was he? All of his playfulness and affection the past few days had to mean something. He couldn’t be acting this way when he was still involved with someone else, could he?
“I’m going to answer this. I can go in the other room, if you want.”
She didn’t want to seem any more insecure than she already had, though inside, Adelie cringed.
“It’s okay,” she said, praying that it would be.
***
Maddox grimaced, wishing he could take the call somewhere Adelie wouldn’t hear. But he wouldn’t push her away again, not after the connection they’d had last night and then again this morning. Unlike Adelie, he’d kissed plenty of girls, but he wasn’t sure there had ever been a kiss like that one. So tender, so vulnerable. It’d had a supercharged effect, like their exteriors had been stripped away and their souls had been connecting. Who knew a kiss could hold that much impact?
Alice And The Billionaire's Wonderland (Once Upon A Billionaire Book 3) Page 16