“Looks like you’re going to be stuck with me for a little longer than you thought.”
Her head turned from the television and she stared at him, a blank look, as if she were struggling to comprehend spending Christmas with him.
“Don’t worry, I won’t take it personally,” he said.
The blank look remained and he couldn’t help smiling.
“Would you like something to drink?” he asked.
“Uh…sure. Water.”
He turned.
“Wait.”
Stopping, he looked back at her.
“Make that a dirty martini. Tanqueray.”
“Is this another Scotch moment?”
She smiled. “Nope.”
Smiling back, he made his way through the crowd to the bar and five minutes later returned with a martini and a beer and two bottles of water tucked under his arm. He handed her the martini.
She lifted the drink and sipped. Her eyes were that blue-green color again. She had a slender nose and plump lips and prominent cheekbones. Her hair was uncombed but it looked good that way, with all its layers. She had a lot of it, too. Enough to sink his fingers into and pull her head back for a long kiss.
Whoa. Where had that come from? He drank some beer and pretended to study all the people around them. But his interest soon gravitated back to Shanna. She was wearing jeans and high heels that made her seem taller than she was. Her tan sweater molded to her nice breasts. Not too big, not too small.
There he went again. Noticing her that way. Dating her was one thing, but this animal attraction had flared so fast he could hardly keep up with it.
He drank some more beer. Was he mistaking the answering warmth? She’d never shown any hints of it at the coffee shop. But now…
The hostess called a name and the couple sitting at the table beside them got up. Shanna climbed onto one of the seats. He put the waters on the table and sat across from her. A woman came and wiped the table and took the dirty glasses away. He sipped his beer and put it on the table.
Funny, how the city was shut down and they had their own little oasis. What a stroke of luck that he could enjoy dinner with a beautiful woman while chaos took place outside the hotel walls. He looked over at Shanna.
“Well, I already know what you do for a living…what about your family? Do they live in Portland?”
She looked at him as though she couldn’t believe he’d asked. “I’m not one of your dates, so don’t start following your script.”
He leaned back in his chair, a little stunned. “What script?”
“You ask all your dates that question.”
“Were you listening that closely?”
She averted her gaze, scanning the crowd without appearing to pay much attention to what she saw.
“How else was I supposed to get to know them?” he pressed.
Turning back to him, she contemplated him. Frustration beamed off her. But then slowly her temperament smoothed, as if she realized she’d revealed too much emotion.
That interested him. She didn’t want to get to know him, or she wasn’t going to let herself. Either he’d have to work hard to get her to open up, or give up now and just get through the blackout.
He sipped his beer and watched two couples laughing at a table near theirs.
“My parents and my brother and his wife and three kids live in Portland,” she said.
He smiled as he looked at her again. Was she just being civil or was temptation playing a role, too? “I have a brother in San Diego. My parents and sister and older brother live in Broken Bow, Nebraska.”
“And you weren’t going to see them for Christmas?”
“I’ve been busy with work. A new acquisition, and some reorganization going on.”
“You’re working over Christmas?”
He shrugged. “It happens sometimes.”
“And you were married once?”
“Now who’s following a script?” he teased.
She smiled and gave her head a little shake. “Sorry. I guess I’m a little tainted right now.”
“That bad, huh?” Must have been hurt by a man. “How long were you with him?”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“You already know the answer.”
She knew a lot about him, what with her eavesdropping and all. It should bother him, but it didn’t. Instead, it flattered him to know she was so curious.
“We didn’t date that long,” she said. “He was just another online player, claiming to be looking for something long-term, when in fact, he was dating anything that responded to his e-mails.”
“Not everyone is like that on those sites.”
Her eyes changed to mocking skepticism.
“I may have dated a lot of women, but I also know what I’m looking for.”
“And after fifty attempts you haven’t found it?”
He couldn’t deny it looked bad. Was he being too picky? “Most of them were one-time dates. A few of them had potential, but either they lost interest or I did. The one that came close decided she didn’t want to be with an executive. It’s nothing immoral.”
“You spend holidays alone to work and you aggressively pursue women. What are you looking for?”
“You mean, you didn’t hear that when you eavesdropped on my conversations?”
She lowered her eyes and turned her martini glass in a circle.
She had heard. He found that incredibly tantalizing.
“Were you ever married?” he asked.
“No, but I was engaged once. I was with him for ten years, but I finally realized he wasn’t right for me. We were too different, and we were growing apart.”
“How many men have you dated since then?”
She sipped her martini and didn’t respond. He grinned because he could tell she knew what he was after. She didn’t even have to answer. She’d dated a lot of men.
“I wasn’t looking for meaningless sex,” she protested.
“Neither am I.”
“Okay…then maybe you’re just looking for someone who will neatly fit into your busy schedule. Someone who won’t complain about the hours you work.”
Her observation was accurate. But why did it sting coming from her? “What’s wrong with that? I want someone who accepts me the way I am.”
“Maybe that’s why you’re having such a hard time finding her. What woman wants a man who’s only willing to offer mediocre to a relationship?”
“I’m not offering mediocre.”
“No?”
“Do you always say exactly what’s on your mind?”
She breathed a laugh and he could tell she’d realized she might be getting a little too harsh. “I’m sorry. It’s just, if it was me dating you, I wouldn’t want to come second to your company.”
“If I was dating you, I doubt that would be possible.”
Her smile remained and she took her time replying. “Do you say that to all the girls?”
“No.” Amazing. He hadn’t.
Reluctance to believe him hovered in her beautiful blue-green eyes.
“What are you looking for in a man?” he asked, not wanting this conversation to end. He wanted to get to know her, more than he’d wanted to get to know any other woman before her. “You probably want the usual. Fidelity, honesty, all that, but what about the man? What do you want from him as a person?”
He watched her genuinely ponder his question. “I…I guess I just want someone who fits. Someone who understands the way I think and likes it. Someone who makes me laugh and who I can be myself with and am physically attracted to.”
“And you’ve never found it? Not even with one or two?”
A frown put a crease between her eyebrows. “I thought I found it with the last guy, but he dropped a bomb on me when he broke it off. I wasn’t expecting it. I thought we were hitting it off, and all along he was thinking the opposite.”
“Dating can be that way.”
“Yeah. I sure
am sick of it.” She smiled wryly.
He returned the smile. “I am, too.”
“A real connection is always missing,” she said. “Sometimes I get close, but it never quite fills the bucket, you know?”
“Yeah, I do.” Boy did he ever. The similarities between them were beginning to resonate a little too much. Why had they both dated so many people and not found what they were looking for? And why were they connecting like this? Why her? Why now?
She didn’t say anything more, so he sipped his beer and glanced around the bar. He spotted someone that made him stop. His date from the coffee shop. She sat at the bar, drink in front of her, alone, and looking at him with a sullen pout. She must not have made it home from the coffee shop. He wondered how she’d gotten to the hotel. Had she slid off the road and gotten a ride or had road closures turned her around?
“I hope her daughter is okay,” Shanna said, turning from looking over her shoulder.
He couldn’t help the flash of irritation. “I’m sure her husband took care if it.”
The tiny smile said she was stifling a full grin. It worked to defuse his wavering mood.
“I thought someone like you wouldn’t mind meeting a woman who was only after sex. It’s sort of a refreshing change, isn’t it? The woman after it instead of the man, I mean.”
Someone like him? “If I wanted a married woman, I’d have never gotten divorced.”
“Why did you get divorced, anyway?”
“Are we on a date now?”
“No.”
She seemed indignant enough to amuse him. “Yes, we are. And you already know the answer anyway.”
“She left you for another man. I know. But why’d she go looking?”
“She didn’t support my choice in careers.”
“In other words, you didn’t pay enough attention to her.”
“I was with her every spare moment I had.” But somewhere inside him he knew she was right.
“When? The few minutes before you fell asleep every night? And then there must have been the times you traveled.”
“I asked her to go with me a lot of the times.”
“If you really wanted your marriage to work, you would have found time to be with your wife. I think you just wanted the convenience.”
“Convenience?”
“I’ve met so many men like you. You’ve invested so much of yourself in your career that you don’t know what you want for anything else in your life. It’s a miracle if you can decide with any certainty what kind of music you like, much less what you want a woman to have between her ears. It’s the stuff between her legs that counts most.”
Ok, that was going too far. “Hey, I wasn’t the one who burned you.”
She sank back against the chair, repentance in her eyes. “He didn’t burn me. I didn’t care enough for him to have that much of an affect on me. He just showed me what a fool I’ve been, searching online for someone worthy enough to take seriously.”
“Not every man who uses online dating sites is bad.”
“Are you trying to tell me you’re one of those men?”
“Yes.”
“I’ve heard that before.”
“You didn’t meet me online.”
She didn’t have anything to say to that, but her eyes still held a sarcastic distrust that he found endearing.
He smiled and flagged the waitress for the bill. At least he wasn’t going to be bored while the city was paralyzed under ice.
The restaurant ran out of eggs and sausage by ten the next morning, so Shanna had called for oatmeal. Now it was after one in the afternoon and Kane wasn’t back from wherever it was he’d gone. When she’d awakened, he wasn’t there. She should be glad for the reprieve. Spending so much time with him was beginning to wear on her. Could she afford to trust him? He’d dated fifty women. What made her any different than all of them? It would be sweet to believe she was, but reality wouldn’t be so kind. If she got involved with him, would she just be signing herself up for another heartache?
She paced by the television. “The airport has reopened, but most of Seattle remains without power today and there’s no indication of when it will be restored…” a news anchorwoman said.
How long was she going to be stuck here? Tomorrow was Christmas. She’d already called her mother on her cell. She hadn’t had service until late this morning.
What if she woke up on Christmas morning with Kane?
She stopped pacing. She wanted to.
Worse, she missed him right now. She didn’t know where he was and that bothered her—like they were a couple. It had only been a day and she was already attached. What was the matter with her?
She had to do something.
Grabbing her jacket and purse, she checked on Scotch curled up on the couch and then left the suite. On the main level, she passed the lobby with its dark wood and copper fireplace. People sat around it, some talking, some reading. She didn’t see Kane’s long-lost date. She reached the front doors.
“Excuse me, Ms.?” someone called from her right.
Shanna stopped and looked at a man dressed in a hotel security uniform, standing next to the entrance.
“The National Guard is patrolling the streets. If you don’t have to go anywhere, I’d suggest you didn’t.”
“I have a coffee shop not far from here. I want to make sure it hasn’t been looted. I can walk there.”
“National Guard has everything under control in the downtown area. You don’t need to worry.”
Well, that was good news, anyway. She wasn’t so sure about not worrying, though. But even if her shop had been looted, the National Guard was in the area. What more could she do?
“Thank you.” She turned and headed for the restaurant, where it appeared everyone else had gathered. Like last night, it was crowded. She entered the throng, listening to the chatter, hearing a few slurring words. Some had decided to spend their time drinking. She found a small table and sat. A day-old newspaper lay there, so she started reading.
But it wasn’t long before her thoughts turned back to Kane. The prospect of getting involved with him scared her. Maybe she should shut him out until she was able to go home.
And then what? Never try love again? Is that where she was headed?
Maybe all those dates just hadn’t been right. Maybe the men had all been wrong for her. Did she want to pass up the chance that Kane could be different?
She wasn’t sure she could risk it. Kane liked women too much. Or was that really what drove him? Maybe he was searching just as hard as she was? Maybe they were looking for the same thing. Except he was looking for the wrong thing. He wanted a woman who fit his schedule, when what he needed was a woman who fit him.
Kane left his office and made his way back toward the Warwick. The weather had cleared but it was still cold. Ice clung to eaves and light poles and cars, but signs of a meltdown were beginning. Cleanup efforts were heavily under way. The main roads in the downtown area were being cleared. Workers were busy repairing power lines.
After two hours trying to work, he finally admitted the real reason he’d left the hotel room. He hadn’t wanted to be there when Shanna woke. Seeing her again, in the morning, in his hotel room, would have driven him mad. He wanted her. All morning he’d tried to tell himself it was just physical. She was an attractive woman. What man wouldn’t have sexual fantasies of going into her room and stripping her naked? He’d barely slept because of those tortuous thoughts.
He came upon Hisashi’s Bar and Grille and spotted Hisashi hammering plywood over his broken windows. Kane veered across the street.
Hisashi saw him and stopped hammering, climbing down from his stepladder.
“Mr. Ramsey, what are you doing out at such a time? Did you not make it home yesterday?”
“What happened?” he asked instead of answering.
Hisashi shook his head as an expression of angst and anxiety consumed his face. “Last night a group of young boys broke into my
restaurant. They take everything from my register. A whole day’s worth. It will not be easy to recover this, what with all the repairs I must now do.”
An impulse hit him. It was Christmas Eve and he was going to spend it with Shanna. She didn’t trust his intentions, but if he showed her he wasn’t like her other dates, maybe he could make this thing between them last long enough to see where it led.
“You have any fresh seafood in there?” he asked Hisashi.
“Ya, ya. I had a small generator. At least I have not lost that.”
“Good. I’d like to order takeout.” He pulled out his wallet and counted a thousand dollars. “Will this help?”
Hisashi shook his head and waved one of his hands. “No, no. You no need to do that.”
“Take it. Make me a nice dinner for two.”
Hisashi smiled big and took the money. A half hour later, Kane had a bag of fresh food. And wasn’t Shanna going to be surprised?
Would she think he was trying to seduce her? Let her. Because he was. And a lot more than that. He wanted to explore her. She was the first woman he’d met in a long time who stimulated him on a deep level. Challenged his thinking, his ideals.
Entering the hotel, he rode the elevators to their floor and opened the door to his suite. Shanna wasn’t in the living room. It was getting late.
She wasn’t in the bedroom, either, but seeing the unmade bed reminded him of the thoughts that had plagued him all night. That’s when he could no longer deny it. Along with his fantasies, the things she had said last night, made him confront, had run through his head, too.
He’d divorced a woman who hadn’t been able to handle his work schedule and he was in danger of repeating the mistake. He’d told himself he wanted a woman who could handle his ambition, but the truth had reared up in his conversation with Shanna. How had she managed to do that?
She wasn’t afraid to say what was on her mind, for one. Maybe she felt as if she had nothing to lose. She saw him as a man she’d never end up with, so why not? It had opened his eyes.
Did he really want a woman who fit his work first and everything else second? Someone who’d stay in the background while he conquered the corporate world? His ex had accused him of never wanting to spend time with her. Now he knew she’d been right. He didn’t want that again. He wanted to be consumed with a woman. And he wanted to see if that woman could be Shanna.
Kiss Me on Christmas Page 4