14
JEANNETTE WOKE TO bright sunshine, the sound of birds outside the open window and a hastily scribbled note on Zach’s pillow. The down pillow—of course he would have bought the best—retained the impression of his head, but it was cool to the touch. Jeannette glanced at the clock and realized he’d been gone for hours.
Had to leave for work, the note said. Will be back after 5. Z. Using only his initial suggested a certain intimacy, but he hadn’t added a closing endearment or even XXOO. Had she been the one writing the note to him, she would have had trouble with a closing, too.
Thinking that she loved him after such a short time sounded delusional. Yet she couldn’t come up with any other word that described the bone-deep emotion that gripped her whenever she thought of Zach. She cared in a way that couldn’t be explained given their brief acquaintance.
Sure, the sex had been great from the beginning, and they’d had a lot of it. But it had never been only about sex, although she’d tried to tell herself that. The term making love wasn’t a euphemism in this case, at least not for her.
She’d felt a deeper connection from the moment they’d met in the barn. She’d always prided herself on being logical, but the feelings that had developed so quickly between them defied common sense. She sensed that Zach might be struggling with the same question of emotion versus logic.
Glancing at the clock, she was shocked to discover it was after ten. Normally she was too type A to sleep this late, especially in a strange bed. Zach must have left with the stealth of a cat burglar, which was amazing considering his size and the tight quarters. He’d even managed to open some windows without making noise.
She could picture him taking great care not to disturb her, though. She wondered if he’d set a mental alarm clock in order to wake up on time. She could have done that, too, but she’d had no obligation other than her ride with Sarah at two, so she hadn’t bothered.
The concept of leisure was foreign to her, but apparently she’d adapted well enough to sleep late this morning. Stretching languidly, she climbed out of bed, pulled on Zach’s enormous bathrobe and padded into the living room. Once again, Zach had picked up the discarded clothes. Hers were folded neatly on the living room couch.
Rainbows danced on the wall. She peered out the window. Something moved in the trees, and a thrill of apprehension zipped up her spine until she identified the shapes of deer.
She counted three as they moved through the trees, no doubt headed down to the stream for a drink. If she lived in a cabin in the woods, she’d be treated to sightings of wildlife on a regular basis. More than that, her growing self-reliance would be nurtured in a setting like this.
Standing in the living room of Zach’s Airstream, she came to a decision—and a pretty darned big one, too. She wanted to leave Virginia, regardless of how her relationship with Zach turned out. Whether she’d end up here was a question mark, but she needed a complete change of scenery and some geographical distance from her parents.
She wasn’t sure how much their expectations ruled her behavior, but she suspected it was a lot. Whenever she’d thought of the partnership she’d been working so hard for, she’d imagined how pleased they’d be. The partnership had been a prize to lay at their feet, not something she craved for herself.
Without this trip to Jackson Hole and meeting Zach, she might never have gained that insight. Ironically, watching him avoid his issues had brought hers into sharper contrast. She might be able to retain her budding feeling of independence without moving, but changing her environment would help enormously. If she stayed there, she might fall back into old, familiar patterns.
Which was exactly why Zach didn’t want to practice law. She sucked in a quick breath. Okay, she got it now. He’d made changes in his life, changes he didn’t want to reverse. He was afraid practicing law might coax him into old habits.
Although she could look at the man he was now and be certain that wouldn’t happen, he couldn’t see that. Telling him he’d be fine working as a lawyer wouldn’t convince him any more than someone telling her that she’d function just as well living a few miles away from her parents’ horse farm. She’d rather play it safe and leave. Zach would rather play it safe and be a ranch hand.
Of course their situations weren’t identical. She’d always be her parents’ daughter, which meant she had to deal with those dynamics even if she were living somewhere else. Zach had completely severed his ties with his profession, something he’d once loved and probably still did on some level. There was the rub.
Groaning in frustration, she sank down to the small couch in his living room. Understanding him didn’t make the problems go away. If anything, they seemed more daunting than ever. She’d thought to use lawyerly logic on him, but that wasn’t going to do a damn bit of good.
After another leisurely breakfast of coffee and PB-and-J sandwiches, she cleaned up the kitchen and made Zach’s bed. Taking plenty of time for these simple chores felt relaxing, but she could feel the beginnings of restlessness.
She texted Erin to find out how her research was going but didn’t get an immediate answer. Maybe Erin was taking a few hours off. After all, it was Sunday. But Jeannette had been away from work for more than a week, and she missed it.
Hoping that Erin would see the text and respond, she paged through a couple of magazines. Finally she gave up and navigated the challenge of Zach’s tiny indoor shower. She dressed in another pair of her recently purchased jeans and a short-sleeved knit top.
Her boots hadn’t rubbed blisters on her feet and the white straw hat would be perfect for riding. She felt like a Westerner, although a slightly bored Westerner. Thank goodness Sarah had invited her for a ride. And she should be back before Zach came home.
Then she realized that if she locked the door behind her as she’d planned to, she didn’t have a key to get back in. She checked around the outside for a hidden spare and didn’t find one. Oh, well. Zach was at the ranch, so she’d find him there and ask to borrow the key.
With that problem solved, she climbed into her rental car and headed slowly and carefully back to the ranch. She drove straight down to the barn, where Sarah was already saddling the smaller of two brown-and-white Paints. Jeannette parked and walked over to help.
“You’re right on time!” Sarah called out.
“I’ve been lookin’ forward to it.” She approached the larger of the two horses. “Want me to go ahead and saddle this guy?”
“Sure. I picked Spilled Milk for you, so you might as well get to know each other. He’s partial to women so you two should do fine together.”
“I’m sure we will. You’re a handsome boy, Spilled Milk.” Jeannette copied Sarah’s saddling technique. The process was similar to what she was used to with an English saddle, so she probably could have muddled through on her own. Truthfully she hadn’t saddled her own horse in a while, but she’d learned as a kid and the process came back quickly.
A groom had always saddled a horse for Jeannette’s mother whenever she rode, and Jeannette had fallen into that habit, too. Saddling Spilled Milk herself did allow her to become acquainted with the horse, just as Sarah had said. A scratch under his mane, a pat on his withers and some murmured words of greeting made a huge difference in how she felt about the upcoming ride. Wherever she moved would definitely be horse country and from now on she’d personally saddle any horse she rode.
After she tightened the cinch, she mounted up to check the length of the stirrups. “These seem a little long,” she said to Sarah. “But I’m used to the shorter ones of an English saddle, so you’d better tell me if this is right or not.”
“They look fine to me. When you stand up in them, you should have a little daylight between you and the saddle, but not a whole lot. Yeah, that’s perfect. Ready?”
“You bet. Can’t wait.”
Sa
rah climbed on her horse. “Then we’re off. In the beginning the trail’s wide enough for us to ride side-by-side, which makes it easier to talk.”
Jeannette walked Spilled Milk down a path that led through a meadow filled with the buzzing of insects and a riot of red, yellow and purple wildflowers. Breathing deep, she savored the familiar scent of horse and oiled leather. Tension flowed out as she exhaled, and she vowed to spend more time with horses in the future. They never failed to relax her.
Sarah rode alongside on her dramatically marked brown-and-white Paint. The mare carried herself like royalty, arching both her neck and her tail as she pranced more than walked down the trail.
“Pretty mare.”
Sarah patted her horse’s neck with obvious affection. “This is Bertha Mae.”
“Bertha Mae?” Jeannette laughed. “Lookin’ at her I would have guessed a far more exotic name than that.”
“That’s the name she arrived with, and nobody thought to change it. Now I wouldn’t want to.” She glanced over at Jeannette. “I don’t know if you’ve heard that my first husband died in a rollover with a horse trailer.”
“Regan told me about it. That must have been a terrible time for your family.”
“It was. Really terrible. But we all came through it, including Bertha Mae.”
“She was the horse in the trailer?”
Sarah nodded. “At first I wanted nothing to do with her. Nobody did, although it wasn’t her fault, poor girl.”
“No, but it’s understandable that you wouldn’t want to be around her.” The squeak of leather and the buzz of insects created a comforting background that seemed to invite confidences.
“Eventually I started going out to the barn to talk to her,” Sarah continued, “which helped me and probably helped her. She had to have been lonesome, although she wasn’t as ostracized as I’d thought. Jack had secretly begun to work with her. Aside from being traumatized by the accident, she’d never been ridden.”
“That’s incredible.” Jeannette gazed at the well-mannered horse. “You’d never guess that she’d been through all that.”
“It was mostly Jack’s doing. Four years ago he rode her in Gabe and Morgan’s wedding ceremony, and she’s been a wonderful saddle horse ever since. I love taking her out on the trail.”
“What a heartwarmin’ story. I’m glad you told me.”
“I guess it’s my way of illustrating how time can work wonders. I’m so encouraged by the healing that seems to have taken place between you, Regan and Drake. Thank you for placing yourself in what has sometimes been an uncomfortable situation.”
Jeannette grinned at her. “Aw, ’twarn’t nuthin’, ma’am.”
“Heaven help us, you’re learning the lingo.”
“Not really. That was straight out of a movie. But I feel more a part of the ranch after last night’s party. This ride helps, too. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate the invitation.”
“Zach mentioned that you were comfortable around horses, so it seemed a shame not to take you out for a ride. How’s that Western saddle treating you?”
Jeannette leaned back against the cantle. “It feels like an easy chair compared to what I’m used to, so I’ll need to watch myself and make sure I don’t nod off.”
“Want to go a little faster?”
“Oh, no! I didn’t mean to imply I was bored. Just very relaxed. Trust me, that’s a good thing. I tend to be way too tense and driven.”
“Then I’m glad I brought you out here before you have to head back to a more frantic pace.”
“So am I.” She thought of her recent decision to move and that it would logically take her out West. This ride through wildflowers on a warm August day, with the Grand Tetons still topped with last winter’s snow, gave her a taste of what summer was like in Jackson Hole.
But the winter months were legendary for the bitter cold and blizzards that kept people indoors for days. She decided to get a woman’s perspective on that. “How do you cope with winters here?”
Sarah gave her a curious glance before answering. “We concentrate on the cozy factor.”
“Oh, really?” Jeannette laughed. “That sounds kind of fun.”
“It is, although when the kids were toddlers I’d be lying if I didn’t say there were days I wanted to tear my hair out. But you learn to be a family. When the electricity goes out and you’re operating on generator power, you conserve that resource. Instead of watching TV or listening to music, you light candles, play board games, or...find other ways to amuse yourselves and keep warm.”
From Sarah’s tone, Jeannette knew exactly what she was talking about. “You make it sound romantic.”
“It can be, especially with the right man. It helps to be very good friends with whoever shares your living space. Much as I loved Jonathan, my first husband, he had a tendency to get moody in the winter. Pete is the most optimistic and joyful person I know, even without one of those light boxes to counteract the lack of sun. I confess it’s easier to be snowbound with Pete.”
Jeannette thought about being snowbound with Zach. He’d probably be fine. “I’m afraid I’d be the one who’d go stir-crazy and cause problems,” she said.
“You might surprise yourself.” Sarah hesitated. “Are you contemplating a winter vacation in Jackson Hole?”
“Maybe.” She didn’t dare say more. Zach couldn’t get wind of her plans to move. That would only add pressure to an already tense situation. If he ever decided to start a new legal practice, it needed to be for his sake and not because she’d dangled the possibility of her moving to Shoshone as an enticement.
“If you do, let me know. You’re welcome anytime, and we usually have room except right before Christmas. We fill up with extended family then.”
Jeannette gazed at her. “You have no idea how much that offer means to me. A few days ago I thought I’d never be accepted here.”
“As I said, time can work wonders. I’ve been treading a fine line because I have a daughter-in-law who wasn’t eager to be your friend.”
“Morgan. I know. Thanks to Lily, I think Morgan and I could become friends.”
“I think so, too. And then there’s Tyler. She’s like a daughter-in-law even though technically she’s not. But the ice is cracking there, too.”
“I’ll need a bit more time to win over Cassidy.”
“Yes.” Sarah chuckled. “That little redhead is a spitfire. She sees everything in terms of black and white, but she’ll mellow. If you come back this winter, I predict you’ll make friends with Cassidy.”
“I’d like that.” She noticed that Sarah had made no mention of Zach or what the future might hold for the two of them. Sarah’s generous invitation wasn’t conditional on whether she continued to see Zach. Sarah was extending her friendship to her regardless of what happened with him.
That made the gesture even more precious. Apparently Sarah had decided that she was worthy of being included in activities at the Last Chance. She might not be family, but she was welcomed as a friend of the family. She was no longer a person to be shunned. That was a personal triumph.
Sarah gazed out at the wide path stretching ahead of them. “Are you sure you don’t want to go faster? Spilled Milk has a lovely canter.”
In her current jubilant mood, a canter across this meadow sounded excellent. “Let’s go for it!”
In no time they were covering ground so fast that she had to clap a hand to her head to keep her hat from flying off. At last Sarah held up an arm and they slowed to a trot, and then a walk.
Sarah’s cheeks were pink and she looked far younger than her sixty-nine years. Because she was an experienced trail rider, she’d secured her hat with a string under her chin. Jeannette had thought the string was too dorky, but next time she rode like this she’d use one.
Sarah turned Bertha Mae back in the direction they’d come. “Fun, huh?”
“Too much fun. I loved it.”
“Think of us while you’re back in Virginia. And do consider coming out sometime this winter. See how you like us when the snow’s on the ground.”
“Thanks. I will.” She looked over at Sarah, and for the first time wondered if her hostess were indeed playing matchmaker. If so, she had an extremely subtle touch. And it was working.
15
AT SOME POINT during the day Zach remembered that Sarah had invited Jeannette for a ride and there would be a problem with the key to the Airstream. He removed it from his key ring and tucked it in his other pocket. He’d make sure he got it to her one way or another.
As it turned out, he was involved in stacking sections of the new platform in the tractor barn at the time Sarah and Jeannette were scheduled to ride out, so he missed her. But after he finished working on that project, a job that left him hot and sweaty, he walked outside and spotted Jeannette’s rental car parked near the barn.
The sight of it there made his pulse leap, which indicated just how far gone he was. He didn’t even have to see her. A glimpse of her rental car was enough to make his heart beat faster. He was a sorry mess, and he had less than twenty-four hours to sort things out.
Or maybe he had more than twenty-four hours. He might have twenty-five or -six. He wasn’t exactly sure when her plane left. He should have asked, but he hadn’t realized how critical every minute would become. Because he wanted to maximize his time with her, he wanted to have a few hours off tomorrow until she had to leave for the airport. He’d need to ask for that today and hope Jack would give it to him.
Wednesday was normally his free day, so if he could switch it to Monday, he’d be all set. Even after a month of having a boss, he still hadn’t adjusted to the idea of accounting for his time. Every so often he’d chafe at the concept that he couldn’t leave when he chose to do so. He’d spent too many years in charge of his own calendar, and now he was working a specified shift.
Riding Home Page 14