“Yes daddy,” Casey said with a hitch in her voice. Her face absent of all color.
“Jeanie?”
“Yes sir,” Jeanie answered as she stared at the floor.
It might have been wishful thinking on my part but he seemed to relax a little. “Imagine my surprise when Detective Carter called me to tell me you and Jeanie were here?” He said.
“Austin, this is my dad, Mr. Simpson. He works at the District Attorney’s,” Casey said to me in a quick aside, I could have sworn she said it with a little guilt. “Dad, this is Austin, he….”
“Yes, I work for the District Attorney,” Mr. Simpson said interrupting his daughter to look directly at me and lock me with eyes that let me know what kind of trouble I was in for getting his little girl mixed up in all of this. Great, District Attorney, why hadn’t Casey told me? They were like the high priests of the System; the ones who pulled all the strings and made the system do what they wanted it to do.
“Where were you last night?” he demanded
“With Austin, he…” she said. My gut dropped through the bed and onto the floor. She didn’t have to make it sound like that. I was dead.
“Mr. Simpson,” I interrupted as I tried to push myself into a sitting position. I figured if I let Casey keep talking she was going to dig me a six foot hole I’d never get out of. “Mr. Simpson, nothing happened, I swear. ….”
“Be quiet,” he barked. “I’ll deal with you later. Casey, Jeanie, outside, now.”
“Daddy, you don’t ….”
“Don’t Daddy me. You’re in so much trouble the three of you will be lucky you don’t spend the next year in jail. It’s taking a ton of favors keeping your names out of the police report. Now move it.” He said pointing down the hall.
Casey shot me a look of pure pain. “I’ll be right back,” she said as she touched my shoulder.
“Sure, I understand,” I said. And I did understand. She wouldn’t be coming back. No way was Mr. Simpson going to let her get within fifty feet of me ever again. Remember, I told myself. This is what you wanted. Casey going back to her world. She’d probably be grounded. But it’d be somewhere safe, somewhere warm. I nodded my head indicating she should go.
Here fingers trailed along my arm as she slowly left my side. Biting her lip, a tear began to gather in the corner of her eye. Wiping at it she turned one last time. “I’ll be right back, don’t leave.”
“Come on, not here, down the hall,” Mr. Simpson said as he herded them away.
Casey
“Dad, you don’t understand,” I said as he moved us towards the exit. “We’re not leaving. I have to make sure he’s taken care of.
“Casey, the best thing for that boy’s health is to get you as far away from him as possible. Now come on. You are within a hairs breadth of getting him thrown into jail. Now move it.”
I’d never seen my dad like this. Not this mad. He looked like a boiling pot ready to spill over. Or worse explode. This was different I told myself, this isn’t a ‘B’ on a report card, or forgetting to do my choirs. This had been an open rebellion against his rules. He looked at me as if I’d really hurt him, betrayed him somehow. My insides where turning over, I thought I might get sick right there in the hospital corridor. Wouldn’t that be fitting? Only it’d give him something else to be mad about.
I let myself be led out of the hospital and into the front seat of his car. I knew that if I fought, my father was capable of ruining Austin’s life. -Austin- what must he think about me abandoning him like this. Would he hate me forever? I promised myself I’d make it up to him. I could skip school on Monday; I could find his apartment. The old glove factory right? I’d pay him the money; He’d lived up to everything in our agreement and so much more. Most of all I’d be able to see that he was all right. Sighing to myself I leaned against the passenger door as far away from my father as I could get.
“We’ll drop you off Jeanie,” Dad said as he pulled away from the hospital.
“No dad, you…”
“It’s okay Casey, I need to go home. I can’t hide from it forever.” I looked at my friend. She was serious. She was going to face her mom and deal with the repercussions.
“Are you sure? If it doesn’t work out you can come stay with us.” I didn’t look at my dad for confirmation. I wasn’t talking to him. Jeanie could live with us and he’d have to deal with it.
The drive home was as silent as a crypt. Dad’s white knuckles on the steering wheel let me know he was still steaming. Jeanie kept staring out her window, lost in thought and I couldn’t stop picturing Austin all alone, hurt, and abandoned. I’d fix it somehow, I’d find a way. He needed that money to get out of there and nothing was going to stop me from getting it to him.
Our neighborhood stood out like a bruised thumb. Soft green lawns in front of huge McMansions. Kids playing hopscotch on pristine and empty sidewalks. Every person on a bike, kid and adult wore helmets. No one would dare break any rules. It was the quite that struck me like a soft brick. Even the distant freeway sound muted. It was like burying your head under a pile of blankets.
I had a hard time breathing as we pulled into the front of Jeanie’s house. I felt so bad for her. I wished I could make it easier for her somehow and jumped out to walk with her.
“No Casey, you stay here, I’ve got to do this by myself.” She said as she hugged me. “Thank you for rescuing me, No matter what happens. You did the right thing and I will always love you for it. Don’t be too mad at your dad, he’s worried about you.” Sighing to herself she turned and slowly moved towards the front door like a person walking to the gallows. The door sprang open and Mrs. Walker rushed out, her face carved with worry lines. They stood and faced each other for a moment then fell into an earth shaking hug. At least there would be one happy ending this weekend.
Getting back in the car I glanced at my dad as he watched Jeanie and her mom go back into the house. I wanted him to acknowledge the good that I had achieved. But he didn’t say anything, instead simply started the car and drove off.
When my mom stepped through the front door I saw the worry in her eyes and I lost it, totally and completely lost it right there in front of the entire neighborhood. I started crying as I threw myself into her embrace. That deep ugly crying when you can’t catch your breath and speak at the same time. “Mom….he….he… I… Money,” I blubbered, covering her shoulder in tears. “He, won’t, listen ... He, oh mom!” Disgusted with myself I ran into the house and up the stairs to my room. Throwing myself onto my bed in one last desperate attempt to rid myself of this empty lost feeling inside.
Mom came in. I could tell it was her by the soft perfume and the gentleness of her steps. I know she’d been worried about me but I couldn’t think of that. All I could think about was Austin and how he must be feeling.
Sitting down on the bed next to me she began to rub my back and quietly repeated. “Shssh, it will be okay. Shssh, everything is going to be all right,” she said, as her gentle fingers massaged some of my pain away.
“Mom, you don’t understand. He wouldn’t let me explain.” I said into my pillow.
She stopped rubbing for a minute and I knew she was smiling for some reason. “Then tell me. What’s going on? Why did you leave Stephanie’s?”
Turning on my side I looked at her. Really looked at her and realized that maybe she would understand. Sighing I gathered myself and started telling her everything, Steph seeing Jeanie, skipping the field trip. The dark tunnel. Taking the bus the next day, Austin. I told her everything about Austin. How great he was. How he protected me so many times. How I could never have gotten Jeanie back without him. I told her about his world, where he lived and how. About the gas station and the Chinese food. How lamp oil smells. I told her about sitting in his room with my back against a brick wall and talking through most of the night.
I almost told her about the kiss in his room. The kiss against which all my future kisses would be measured. But I wisely decided to ski
p that part and somehow I think she knew I skipped it but she didn’t press. She sat there with her gentle smile and occasional caress and brought it all out of me, everything I owed to Austin. How unfair it was that he had to live like that while I got to live like this.
She winced when I told her about what Jeanie had almost been forced into and I saw that gentle look instantly turn into a lioness scowl. Her lips pressed together but she didn’t interrupt. I told her about Billy, and about Austin. About getting slapped and Austin fighting to protect me. About running from the police and going over the roofs of buildings. About fire escapes and Hazelnut Mocha coffee.
About how dad wouldn’t listen and would hate me forever and forever. How I had left Austin all alone in a hospital with no one to look out for him. All of it came bursting out like a breached dam.
When I was done I let her hold me and rock me back and forth. Eventually I regained some semblance of control. I realized it didn’t matter if my mom understood. She’d love me anyway. That while I might make her mad, I couldn’t make her not love me. And that Austin would never have that.
That little thought started me blubbering again.
It seemed like forever but eventually she got me to lie down and rubbed my back until I started to fall asleep.
I heard her quietly leave my room and whisper yell down the hall, “James – We need to talk.”
Austin
My crappy make believe apartment was emptier than my heart. Without Casey it was all useless and sort of pointless. Sighing to myself I stuck my hands under my head as I stared at my ceiling. She had to go I kept telling myself. It’s what you wanted remember. She has to go back to her world. She shouldn’t be stuck down here because you are. If you love her then the last thing you should want is for her to be here right now.
I kept telling myself that. I repeated it a hundred times but it didn’t make the pain go away. It wasn’t the money. I’d figure something out. It was that she wasn’t going to be here. She’d have a life full of fun and achievement and I wouldn’t be there to see it. To share those special moments.
My head pounded and every muscle still ached. The Doctor had wanted to keep me overnight but I convinced him that he shouldn’t waste his time trying. Instead they’d given me enough Tylenol to kill a rhinoceros and fed me enough to last awhile. Two different nurses and a social worker had brought me lunch trays. But they couldn’t fix what was really broken. My heart was carved into a million little pieces and tossed into the wind.
I didn’t cry, I swear. I might have come close, but I didn’t. Instead I laid there and remembered every wonderful thing about her. The way she tossed her hair when she wanted to make a point. How her laugh would start in her eyes. How she made me feel normal, as if I was as good as anyone else, maybe even better. The way she smelled of Honey and coconuts, fresh and pure. It was a smell that I knew I would never forget.
I don’t know how long I lay there. I’m pretty sure I’d fallen asleep again when a distant sound woke me. A sharp knock on my door brought me back to full consciousness. Before I could say or do anything the door swung open and Mr. Simpson stepped in.
The room most definitely didn’t feel empty. He filled all the unused space. His brow scrunched up in a scowl as he looked around my room. Judging and despising everything he saw. I’m sure he was thinking about that fact that his daughter had spent the night in this hole with this peace of trash.
His eyes finally came to rest on me. Let’s say that it was a less than an endearing look. It was hard to believe someone as gentle and sweet as Casey had been raised by this man. I could see her in his high cheek bones and they both had the same colored eyes and hair. There was a resemblance. But Casey couldn’t have looked this upset if she tried.
He had a least fifty pounds on me and I wasn’t exactly seeing straight. I knew that if he’d come here to finish off what Charlie had started that I wouldn’t have much of a chance. Maybe if I got past him. If I got out that door he’d never catch me.
Looking me up and down and then around the room again he nodded to himself and came to some type of conclusion. “As you can imagine, Casey is rather special to me,” he said as he reached into his suit and started to remove something. My stomach dropped as I took a step towards the door. Was he going to shoot me right here, Nothing happened between us. Damn.
His three finger hand came out holding his wallet and I started to breathe again. Careful Austin, I told myself, this isn’t over; he could still pound you into next week. “Casey told us that we owe you some money, She told us about what you did for her, how you took care of her. About rescuing Jeanie.”
I nodded slowly trying to figure out what the deal was. Had he come all the way down here to pay me? Why?
“Jeanie, is almost as important to me, I’ve known her since she was born. I swear if anything had happened to her…” His fingers clenched into fists again and I could see that anger starting to return. “Anyway, I think you have more than earned this.” He said handing over a wad of twenties. I knew right away that it was way more than two hundred, probably closer to five. My heart jumped as I looked at the money. Was he serious?
“Thank you,” I mumbled, I didn’t like saying it. I’d earned that money, but my mom would have expected it of me.
He turned, examining every corner of my room. “You know, you might find this hard to believe, but I used to live not far from here, over on fourth. In fact I met Casey’s mom when her car broke down in a rather bad part of town. Believe it or not it was even worse back then.”
My jaw dropped, he used to live down here. No wonder he was so pissed. He knew what this place could be like. Once again I was happy for Casey, if her father had gotten out, then he would fight hell and high water to make sure nothing ever went wrong in her world.
“Yes Sir,” I said sticking the money into my pocket. “I agree, Casey’s a very special person, you should be very proud of her. I’m very glad she got home safely. Please don’t be too rough on her, what she did she did for the right reasons, for a friend.”
He nodded, looked around the room one more time then shook his head. “I thought I had a hard time getting out, Jesus kid you’ve got a long haul in front of you.”
“Yes Sir, but I’m going to make it or die trying.”
Casey
My life was over, despite what mom said. I wasn’t even concerned about my punishment. Being grounded didn’t seem like that big a deal when all I wanted to do was spend the rest of my life in my bed, preferably in my favorite flannel PJ’s. I’d put them on as soon as I woke from my first crying jag. A girl’s got to feel comfortable when she’s this miserable.
Mom said that they would decide my punishment when dad got home. He’d left sometime while I was sleeping. Even on a Saturday he had to go into the office sometimes. Probably filling out paperwork on Austin, something to hang over my head to make sure I never saw him again. My palms began to sweat and my breath hitched at the thought. I flopped back onto my bed and placed my hands under my head.
I wondered what Austin was doing. Had he gotten home okay? Was he thinking of me? How mad was he. How could I get him the money he needed, the money I owed him. These and a thousand other thoughts buzzed around in my head like swarm of wasps.
I heard the front door open and could tell it was my dad by the way the coat rack squeaked as he hung up his overcoats.
“Casey,” He bellowed from down stairs. “Come here.”
Sighing to myself I threw my feet over the edge of the bed. I didn’t know if I was talking to him yet but I might as well find out what my punishment was so I could get started atoning for all of my supposed sins.
Slamming my bedroom door, I yelled “What!” as I started down the stairs. My dad was at the bottom looking up at me. Mom came in from the kitchen, drying her hand on a dishrag; mom cleaned when she got worried about something.
Dad hesitated a moment then stepped to the side. Behind him Austin looked up with a hesitant grin, as if he
wasn’t sure he was in the right place or not. Austin, My Austin was standing in my entryway. With his green duffle bag next to him.
Without thinking, without caring if my parents were right there or not, I flew through the air and into his arms. He hmphd and took a step back when I crashed into him. Into the one place in the world where I would always want to be.
“Don’t get the wrong idea,” My dad said to my mom. “He’s not living here,” he said to me, his eyes narrowing into daggers. “I might be a push over but I’m not crazy. He can stay with your grandmother; she needs help around the house. And believe me; if he lives there he’ll earn his keep. Hell, keeping her off my back will make it worth it.”
I continued to rain kisses all over his face as I totally ignored my father. Being doubly careful of Austin’s cuts and bruises. I didn’t care where he lived, as long as it was close, somewhere safe and out of where he’d been. He held me in a tight embrace but I could tell he was embarrassed. I imagine having a girl attack you in front of her parents can make a boy feel uncomfortable.
“He can spend the night on the couch and then we’ll spring him on your grandmother tomorrow. The couch! If I see him upstairs I’ll throw him out a window, are we understood?”
“Yes Sir,” Austin said, taking a step back.
I refused to let go of his arm. I wasn’t ever going to let go. “Grandmother’s, which means we’ll be going to the same school. Austin, we’ll be going to the same school,” I said in disbelief.
“We’ll see Casey, one day at a time, understood?” My mom said.
I nodded, I would have agreed to anything she wanted.
“And you Austin, This is your one chance, don’t blow it.” My dad demanded with his typical scowl.
“No sir, believe me I am very aware of how much I have to lose,” Austin said as he put his arm around me and walked with me into my world.
Unwritten Rules Page 9