Equilibrium: MM Gay Shifter Romance (Kingdom of Night Book 3)

by L. C. Davis

  "That's what happened to Prentice," I said sadly.

  "No, it isn't. Prentice is not like the others. Prentice is the Patriarch's true and final vessel. He is the physical incarnation of the Patriarch. He has come not to continue the long line of the hunters, but to end it along with all other life on earth."

  I listened in growing horror as he echoed the Patriarch's words closely. "Why would he destroy all life, including his own children, just to avenge one man?"

  "He wouldn't," he scoffed. "Even the Patriarch is not that mad. His plan isn't to avenge the prince, it's to save his soul. He intends to sacrifice all other life so he can harvest the souls and use them as a ransom. After all, if there are no more bodies, there is no place for their souls to go. No more souls means no more life, and the Matriarch can't have that."

  "If Selene is so desperate to save her own children, why wouldn't she just give the prince back?"

  He laughed. "I'm not talking about the moon, I'm talking about the Mother Earth. Gaia. She goes by many names and takes many shapes. She enjoys living among her children but tries to keep a low profile. She has a symbiotic relationship with most beings and thrives on our life force as we thrive on hers."

  "This is all so hard to believe," I said, holding my head. "So now it's not just the will of the moon and sun we have to contend with but the earth, too?"

  "Afraid so. Fortunately, she's not nearly as capricious as the others."

  "Then why has she kept the prince's soul hostage all this time?"

  "That you'd have to ask her. In any case, Selene has only until the hunter's moon to make a decision before Gaia forces her to choose between her children. If she can't, they will both be destroyed," he said gravely. "Then we'll all be resigned to the aether for eternity. Take my word for it, being a disembodied spirit isn't all it's cracked up to be."

  "You can't reincarnate?" I asked worriedly.

  "No, but I went in knowing that. At least I'm of more use to you now than I was alive."

  "Please don't tell me you did this to help me."

  "Of course not. I killed myself because I killed myself, and perhaps a bit so that I could protect Val. I'm afraid I'm of far more use to her on the other side as well."

  "You love her, don't you?" I murmured. It was so plain to see now. I wondered how I'd ever missed it.

  "That I do. Enough that when the moon gave me a choice between saving her life by driving her into the arms of my brother or letting her die while she still loved me, it wasn't a choice at all. I think that's always irked her," he admitted. "She wanted more of a show, more drama."

  "Wait, she made you choose?"

  "Oh, yes. Though admittedly, I did start it by summoning her to save Val's life in the first place. She was a bit reckless back when we were kids. Went after a vampire on her own, ended up in a bad way. There was barely enough of her left to save when I found her, but I did. The summoning got a bit messy, and you've seen the results of that," he said, peeling back his robe enough so that I could see the grisly scar over his heart. "Anyway, the Old Gal appeared to make me a deal. To this day I'm still not sure if she's a goddess or the devil, but the rest, as they say, is history."

  "Does Val have any idea? Does Billy?"

  "No, and neither of them ever will. You've got to admit, this all sounds a bit familiar, doesn't it?" he needled. "Two brothers vying for the love of their beautiful, reckless soulmate?"

  "Selene is repeating the pattern."

  "She's upped the ante as far as metaphors for duality goes, but yes," he said. "The whole twin thing is a bit in your face if you ask me, but subtlety has never been one of Selene's strong suits."

  "Why would she play with us like this? Like we're dolls in a game of pretend?"

  "Because we are," he said with a shrug. "The moon likes recreating her own conflicts and in this case it's her inability to choose between her children. You and your lovers are by far her favorite dolls on the shelf, but you're nothing more than that."

  "That's why she's forcing me to choose," I said quietly. "The sacrifice was never really about me. She's just using us to act out a trial run of the decision the Matriarch is going to force her to make."

  He nodded. "Good. You're catching on. Keep going."

  "We all have our roles to play," I continued. "I'm her. My soul is literally split between the children she loves most, just like her heart is. The one thing I don't get is why she chose Victor and Sebastian. They're both wolves."

  "Being a wolf and having a lupine soul are two very different things," he said cryptically.

  "What does she get out of doing this?"

  The wind picked up and he looked over his shoulder warily. "I've said too much as it is. You'll figure it out. I have faith in that if nothing else."

  "And when I do figure it out?" I asked. "If the Patriarch doesn't kill us all, the earth will. How do I stop it?"

  "'Nature puts no question and answers none which we mortals ask. She has long ago taken her resolution,'" he mused.

  "Socrates?"

  "Thoreau."

  "If it's all settled, then what's the point?" I asked. "Why give us the illusion of choice when there is none?"

  "There is always a choice," he said firmly. "It just isn't always a pleasant one."

  "And the dream? I know that was your work. Is everyone I love really destined to die?"

  "That's one possibility. Did you notice the empty altar?"

  My heart skipped a beat. "That altar was mine, wasn't it? I can choose. I can trade my life for theirs. That's not even a choice, of course I'll do it."

  Before he could respond, the front door opened with a clatter. "Remus!" Sebastian bellowed.

  I clenched my jaw. "You have to come inside. Val deserves to see you, she deserves to know what you..." I trailed off when I saw that Alex was gone. The bottle he had tossed off the roof was sitting upright in its original spot, full up and sealed in the middle of the bleached shingles.

  "What the hell are you doing up there?" Sebastian demanded. He reached out and lifted me down easily.

  "Just talking to a ghost," I murmured. "How is Val?"

  "She's starting to wake up," he said. "We can't find Billy or Alex anywhere. We've searched every inch of the temple and there's no sign of them, but there's some weird shit in Alex's pond room."

  "The scrying room?" I asked, remembering his thinly veiled attempt to let me know that he had left a message for me. I grabbed Sebastian's hand urgently. "Take me there, please."

  He looked at me worriedly but nodded. "Yeah, alright," he said, leading me inside.

  Once we were in the temple lobby, my gaze immediately went to Maverick. He was sitting on the bench, leaning against Brendan, who had his arm draped protectively around his shoulders. They both looked miserable.

  The others were hanging around in various states of dismay. None of them really knew what to do. "This way," said Sebastian, leading me down the hallway Alex had led us through the first time we visited. When we turned the corner, I saw Victor and Ulric talking closely in front of an open door. When they saw us, Victor's eyes met mine and quickly looked away. He was still upset about my outburst, and I couldn't blame him.

  The apologies would have to wait until later, though. "This is it," said Sebastian, motioning to the door.

  "He's not going in there," said Victor, putting his arm out.

  "You don't understand, Alex left me a message," I said, ducking under Victor's arm as I entered the room. As soon as I did, the scent of dried wolf's blood accosted me even before the sight of it did. There was blood everywhere, painted on the walls in thick red lettering.

  The scrying room was small but it had a domed ceiling with a hole in the top that was now shielded with a tinted glass window. Positioned directly beneath the window was a small, circular pond of water. A cushion sat at its edge, but there was little else in the room.

  The only message to be found was written on the walls in blood. It was the same message, written a dozen times ov
er in varying sizes.

  A PRINCE FOR A KINGDOM.

  I fell to my knees, landing on the cushion. Victor, Sebastian, and Ulric rushed into the room after me. "What the hell were you thinking?" Victor hissed. "He's too sensitive to see this."

  "I protect him from the real danger, this shit is your job," said Sebastian.

  "Remus, what is it?" Ulric asked warily, coming to stand beside me. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

  I laughed dryly, transfixed on the message.

  "'A prince for a kingdom,'" Sebastian murmured. "What do you think it means?"

  "More importantly, whose blood is it?" asked Ulric.

  "I can tell you that," I said, breaking away from the message on the wall long enough to turn to him. "It's Alex's."

  "Alex?" Sebastian frowned. "Why would he vandalize his own room with..." He trailed off and shivered.

  "Sebastian," I began, filled with sorrow now that the shock had worn off. "I'm so sorry. Alex is gone. He shot himself, but he must have come in here to do this first. He said he left a message for me, but I had no idea it would be this."

  "Whoa, whoa," he said, holding a hand up. "What do you mean he's dead? Where did you hear that?"

  "From him. Look, I know it sounds insane but from the moment we pulled up I kept feeling like something was wrong. I kept hearing whispers, and once I was alone he appeared to me."

  The three of them exchanged a look that was getting unpleasantly familiar. They thought I was crazy.

  "Remus," said Victor, placing a hand on my shoulder. Apparently, all was forgiven now that I was nuts. "You had a rough night. Hallucinations after a trauma like that are to be expected."

  "It wasn't a hallucination," I said firmly. "I can prove it. How else would I know that Val was almost killed on a vampire hunting accident as a teenager?"

  Sebastian's eyes widened. He watched me more closely, like he was looking for something. "How did you know that? She didn't even tell me until a few years ago."

  "He's psychic, Sebastian," said Victor. "It doesn't mean anything, he probably just pulled it off her without even realizing it. We haven't even begun to scratch the surface of what he's capable of."

  "Then consider the possibility that I'm able to see ghosts, too!" I shot back. "Why do you think Val is so messed up? I haven't seen Billy around anywhere, have you? The pack hasn't been let out and Alex is nowhere to be found even though he finally had his chance to get the hybrid and the moon's newest priest in the temple at the same time."

  "Everybody only loves you when you're dead."

  I jolted and glanced behind my shoulder to see Alex standing behind me. Jumping to my feet, I looked to the others for any signs that they could see him, too. They looked alarmed alright, but I was the cause, not Alex.

  "They can't see me," he remarked. "Only you can."

  "Why?"

  "Because you're closer to the veil," he said in a somber tone. "Act like everything is normal for now. I don't want my death to ruin your friend's ceremony."

  "It's a little late for that, don't you think?" I asked, crossing my arms.

  "Who's he talking to?" Sebastian asked, looking around worriedly like there were ghost flies in the room. He swatted one away.

  "I believe he thinks it's Alex," said Victor in a slow, 'trying not to alarm the crazy person' tone.

  Ulric was silent, but I could feel him watching me carefully. For the moment, I didn't care what they thought. I wasn't going to let Alex pull another Casper the Disappearing Ghost act on me.

  "Please," he said. "Just humor me until after the ceremony. Then, if Val still hasn't come to, I'll make my presence known."

  "Fine," I muttered, pointing to the wall. "And then you'll tell me what that means?"

  "I gave you the answer and the key. It's up to you to put the rest of it together," he said. "Run along, but ditch your guardians and come back here once you're done. And bring Hunter. You've got a double date with the moon."

  "After everything you told me, why would I want to talk to Selene?" I demanded. Victor and Sebastian were growing more agitated with every question I asked my imaginary friend.

  "Remus, please," Victor said, taking my arm.

  I pulled it out of his grasp.

  "Leave him be," said Ulric.

  "Because she can give you answers," said Alex. "And because even though you may not like her deal, I think you'll prefer it to the alternative once you've heard her out."

  "You promise me you'll be here when I get back?"

  "You have my word."

  "Guess I don't have much of a choice," I muttered, stalking out of the room. Victor and Sebastian were close on my heels, followed soon by Ulric.

  "That was kind of weird back there," said Sebastian. "What's up with all the ghost whisperer stuff?"

  "Nothing," I said, forcing a smile. "Come on, we've got a funeral to attend. Don't wanna keep Mav waiting any longer."

  The twins looked at each other worriedly.

  "Alex was going to perform the ceremony," said Sebastian.

  "He's a bit incapacitated at the moment, but he said we could use the temple," I informed them. "Hunter can do the ceremony."

  "Hunter?" Victor asked doubtfully.

  "Yeah, he's a priest. Sort of. Foster can help him with the finer details," I decided, wandering into the lobby to find them. They were both in the lobby, sitting about as far apart as they could get. Foster was sitting next to Val on the bench where she was snuggled into her jacket, still sound asleep. Hunter was leaning against the front desk, reading one of the sanctuary's brochures.

  Maverick looked up hopefully. "Did you find anyone?"

  "No," I said before Victor could stop me. "But Alex did leave a message saying it was fine for us to use the temple. The ceremony is still on."

  Hope shined brightly in Maverick's eyes and Victor gave me a dirty look. "You shouldn't have done that."

  "You said it yourself, this is about closure for Maverick, not Steven," I whispered. "It doesn't matter if the service is official or not, as long as he thinks it is."

  Victor sighed. "Well, you've left us with little choice in the matter."

  "Can you please just try trusting me for once, even if it's only half as much as I trust you?" I pleaded.

  He scowled at me for a long moment before looking away. "Fine. But if this goes badly, it's your --"

  I smirked. "My funeral?"

  He rolled his eyes. "Pretend I didn't just say that."

  "Gladly," I said, touching his arm before I walked over to Hunter. "So, exactly how much have you been reading up on the priesthood?"

  "Uh, a bit," he said, closing the brochure. "Why?"

  "Because the dead priest's ghost just appeared to me and told me to ask you to conduct the funeral rites." There was little time for skirting around the truth if what Alex said was true.

  Hunter's eyes widened as he listened. After a long pause, he set aside the brochure. "Yeah," he said, nodding. "I'm in, but what do I have to do?"

  I glanced over at Foster who looked like a deer caught in the headlights the second he realized I was paying him any kind of attention. "No idea, but I know someone who does."

  Chapter 12

  REMUS

  With Foster calling the shots behind the scenes, what started out as a disastrous affair turned into a beautiful ceremony. Steven's picture at the front of the great hall was surrounded by flowers Victor had ordered well in advance. Hunter, uninitiated though he was, stood at the front of the hall in a set of blue priest's robes. I could tell he was almost as uncomfortable in them as Foster was with him wearing them, but he was doing his best to put on a solemn face. Before everyone had gathered in the temple, Foster had spent a good deal of time coaching him on his lines.

  By the time they were ready, everyone was seated and surprisingly demure. All the Wolves were clad in formalwear and it was the first time I had seen a couple of them in anything other than athletic wear. Even Foster was in a crisp navy suit, although he looke
d at Hunter's robes with longing. Clara wore a simple black dress that accented her statuesque figure. Maverick wore a black silk shirt and trousers, looking every bit the part of the grieving lover.

  For my part, I had donned the black suit that had hung in the back of my closet for years unused. The overtly masculine clothing felt strange. Alex was right, it didn't suit me at all--no pun intended. Considering the fact that I had never been to a funeral before, never mind a werewolf-sanctioned one, a suit had seemed like the only safe choice.

  The temple itself was beautiful with a vaulted ceiling and vines that hung down from the rafters. The stone pillars were painted in beautiful jewel tones. Oddly enough, there was silver everywhere. Silver candle holders, silver plates filled with fruits, flowers and herbs sitting before the moon's statue, even silver lining on the edges of the pews. The idol of the moon itself was made of smooth white marble and it served as the focal point for the entire temple, which made enough sense.

  The goddess depicted in stone looked far more serene than my imagination had come to suggest. Her beautiful face was turned forward with blank eyes and a beatific expression. Her delicate hands were held palms up at her sides and a lantern dangled from each one. The lantern in her left hand was silver while the one in her right hand was a deep crimson color. Each contained a small white candle identical to the countless other candles that covered nearly every surface in the temple.

  Even I had to admit that the temple was beautiful. It was the object of its devotion that was questionable. Nonetheless, the ceremony went well. Hunter recited the lines Foster had given him flawlessly, at least as far as I could tell. The prayer of blessing seemed a bit forced, but considering that he was improvising off of even less direct experience with the moon than I had, his awkwardness was to be understood.

  "And may her uh, eternal light continue to shine down on the dearly departed, forever and ever," Hunter said, tugging at the collar of his robe like it was choking him. "Amen."