“You’re stupid and silly,” Aunt Arleth said. “Just like your sister was.”
Sinjun drew a deep breath and kept a smile pinned to her mouth.
It was after midnight when Colin came quietly into the laird’s bedchamber. Joan was sleeping very close to the far edge of the bed, the covers pulled to her nose. He smiled, then stripped off his clothes. Naked, he walked to the bed and stepped onto the dais. Slowly, he eased the covers down. She stirred, batting at the covers with her hands, but she didn’t awaken. Slowly, he eased up her long cotton nightgown. Easy and slow, he told himself. He’d gotten it up to her thighs when he was content to stop for a moment and look at her long white legs. Very nice legs, very nice indeed. He felt himself swell, but knew she couldn’t accommodate him tonight. No, he wanted to see if he could accommodate her. He gently lifted her hips and pulled the nightgown to her waist. He moved the candle closer. Ah, but she was lovely. He stared at the chestnut hair that covered her woman’s mound, her flat white belly that could even now have his child growing there. It was a heady thought. She tried to twist away from him, moaning a bit in her sleep. He eased her legs open, and she obligingly parted them more widely. Now, he thought. He bent her knees up and parted her flesh. He winced at the sight of that soft flesh roughened from the hard riding they’d done. He parted her with his fingers, wincing again at the redness. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, and wondered if he should try to give her pleasure. Why not? She needed to learn that it was possible to enjoy him. He leaned down and lightly touched his mouth to her white belly. She quivered; he felt the smooth muscles tighten at the touch of his mouth. He continued kissing her, light, nipping kisses, until he eased down between her legs and found her and blew his warm breath over her flesh. She squirmed. He smiled, pleased.
He parted her soft flesh and lightly touched her with his tongue. In the next instant, she screamed, jerking away from him, flinging her hands out to ward him off, pulling her nightgown down.
“Hello,” he said, grinning up at her. “I love your taste, but I must have more of you to be certain. What do you think, Joan?”
CHAPTER
10
SINJUN OPENED HER mouth to yell again, then closed it. He was lying between her legs, his arms hooked around her thighs, his chin lightly resting on her belly. He was grinning at her.
“Well? Would you like me to do more?”
She got hold of herself, by a meager thread. It was difficult because she’d never imagined such . . .
She said aloud, “What you were doing—it was startling. It is very embarrassing. Are you certain such things are done?”
He leaned down and lightly kissed her again, then raised his head, pushed her legs more widely apart, and gave her a beautiful smile. “You do taste good, Joan. Yes, my dear, a man much enjoys kissing a woman between her legs.”
“I feel very odd, Colin. Would you please let me go? I am not used to having my nightgown around my waist and anyone positioned precisely where you are. It is disconcerting. And you are a man, after all.”
“If I continue to kiss and caress you here, you will enjoy it immensely.”
“Oh no, how could that be true? Really, Colin, let me go now. Goodness, you’re naked!”
“Yes. Don’t be frightened. I have no intention of taking you again. Actually I wanted to see how badly you’d hurt yourself by riding today.”
“I hurt myself! What gall! ’Twas you who hurt me.”
He drew himself up between her legs and she saw that he was staring down at her and now his fingers were lightly stroking over her and she was so embarrassed she couldn’t think of a word to say. “You’re raw, I’m afraid. But you will heal. Just stay off a horse for a while.” Then he kissed her belly, lowered himself over her, and settled himself comfortably. She felt his sex hard and pressed against her and tried to bring her legs together, foolish, of course, because he was lying between them.
“Your breasts feel nice against my chest. What do you think?”
“I don’t like this. I don’t think you can control yourself. I don’t want you to hurt me again.”
“I’m a man, Joan, not a randy boy. I won’t take you, I promise. Now, kiss me and I’ll leave you alone.”
She pursed her lips, but he just laughed and ran his tongue along her bottom lip. “Open your mouth. Don’t you remember begging me to teach you to kiss? How could you have forgotten so quickly?”
“I haven’t forgotten. I just don’t want to do it right and have you become a ravening barbarian again.”
“A good point.” He kissed her again, lightly, then rolled off her. He watched her quickly jerk her nightgown down to her toes, then pull the covers over both of them and lie down on her back, for all the world like a supine statue.
“If you like, you can give me pleasure, then.”
He was balanced on his elbow, facing her. His eyes were dark, his cheeks flushed, and she knew it for what it was. A man’s desire. “How is that possible? You promised, Colin, not to hurt me again.”
“Oh, it’s very possible. I was touching you and fondling you between your legs. You can do the same to me.”
She looked at him as if he were mad, completely and utterly mad.
“It’s done all the time between people who care about each other.”
“I’m not quite certain I understand, Colin.”
“My sex, Joan. You can kiss and caress my sex.”
“Oh.”
“On the other hand, perhaps it’s better that I go to sleep now. I must leave early tomorrow morning.”
“Really? You would like that? It would give you pleasure, Colin?”
He wasn’t deaf to the utter bewilderment and disbelief in her voice, and said quickly, “It’s all right. I do have to get some sleep.”
“I’ll try it, if you wish.”
“What?”
“I’ll kiss you there, if you wish.”
He saw then that she wasn’t at all repelled by the thought of him. On the contrary, she was quite intrigued by the notion, and he felt himself begin to shake. He wondered if he’d spill his seed if he allowed her mouth on him. His sex throbbed. No, best not to disgust her, because he couldn’t be certain that he could control himself. He shook his head vehemently and said, “All right.”
He lay on his back but did nothing more. Sinjun raised the covers and stared at him. He felt her staring at him and throbbed all the more. “Touch me.”
Very slowly, she lowered the covers to his feet, then she simply stared at him for a very long time. She finally flattened her palm on his hard belly just at the instant before he believed he would yell with the need for her to touch him. “You’re beautiful, Colin.”
He couldn’t help it. He moaned, even as he pressed upward. When her fingers lightly touched him, he quivered like a raw young boy.
He held himself rigid, his hands fisted at his sides. “Touch me, Joan. With your mouth.”
She stared at him again, then lightly closed her hand around him. She eased down on her knees beside him, her hair cascading over his belly, but he didn’t notice the beauty of it, the warmth of it, because he was focused on his sex and on her mouth. He felt her hot breath and nearly died from the intense pleasure. When she lightly nipped at him, he very nearly yelled.
“You’re very different from me,” she said, and caressed him; oh, it was tentative, but that made it all the more seductive. “I could never be as beautiful as you.” He wanted to tell her that was nonsense, but he was silent, straining, wanting so much for her to take him into her mouth, but she didn’t, not understanding, really, but she would learn, and he wanted her to do things at her own pace. She experimented and he squirmed and wanted to groan, but held his mouth shut, not wanting to frighten her.
When she finally took him into her mouth, he knew he couldn’t control himself. The nearly painful sensations that rocketed through him shook him deeply. He had to stop this. He had no intention of shocking her or repelling her, and thus, even though he
felt more frenzied, more urgent than he ever had in his life, he pulled her away.
She twisted about to look at him and her hair tumbled over his belly and chest. “Didn’t I do it right?”
He looked into her beautiful Sherbrooke blue eyes and tried to smile—not much of a success that smile, but he tried. “I’m a man, Joan, and it’s difficult for me. Now, no more questions. Settle here, against me, and let’s go to sleep.”
She nestled against him, her palm over his racing heart. She said nothing. Finally, his heart began to slow. She kissed his chest, then said, “I’ll try to do things properly, Colin, and touching you with my hands and my mouth is quite nice, really, for you are so splendid. But this other business of your body—you are much too large, surely you must realize that. It won’t work, you have already seen that it won’t. I’m sorry, but there it is.”
“You’re a ninny who doesn’t know anything.” He kissed her nose, then squeezed her more tightly against him. “I should prefer it if you removed that ridiculous nightgown.”
“No,” she said after several thoughtful moments. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
He sighed. “You’re probably right.”
“Colin?”
“Hmmm?”
“Will you bed other women when you return to Edinburgh?”
He was utterly silent. “Do you believe I took a mistress while my first wife was alive?”
“Certainly not!”
“Well then, why would you believe I would sleep with another woman whilst wedded to you?”
“Men do, I know, except for my brothers. They’re faithful to their wives because they love them very much. I hope you are more like them than all those other men who have no honor. On the other hand, you don’t love me. So it is a question.”
“Will you seduce any men while I’m gone?”
She hit him in the belly, and he obligingly grunted. Then her hand smoothed over where she’d hit him, her fingers splaying downward to touch him, and then he did moan. “No,” he said, his breath hard and deep. “Don’t, please.”
She drew her hand away, and he was both relieved and hated it.
“Why did your aunt Arleth say you’d taken a mistress while your wife was still alive?”
He didn’t answer her but said instead, “She doesn’t much care for me, as you will discover, since you’re my wife and you now live here. I don’t know why.”
“One could believe her, you know,” she said, “except it’s obvious she doesn’t know how you’re made. I know how large you are, I know how a woman would look at you and want to run. That is, you’re beautiful, Colin, but as I told you, that part of you that—”
“It’s called my sex, Joan.”
“Very well, your sex, Colin. What woman could possibly want to do that willingly? It would have to be your wife and thus she’d have to do it.”
He laughed, he couldn’t help it. “You will see. Yes, you will see.”
“Are other men even larger than you?”
“How do I even attempt to answer that question? I’ll sound like a conceited sod if I say no, certainly not, and I’d bludgeon my own male pride if I said yes. I haven’t seen all that many naked men, actually, particularly when they’re aroused. Nonetheless, you don’t know anything about it. You will learn, however. Now, go to sleep.”
She fell asleep before he did. His mind was filled with visions of Robert MacPherson, and the bastard was plotting his demise. He also thought about his very innocent wife, who had no qualms at all about asking him questions about his male parts with the utmost candor. It was amusing, really. He’d never met a girl like her in his life. Ah, and the feel of her mouth on him—it was enough to make a stoic man cry.
He really didn’t want to leave her just yet, but there was no choice. He had so much to do, and he simply refused to put her at risk. She would be safe here. MacDuff had told him MacPherson was in Edinburgh, far from Vere Castle. Yes, she’d be safe here, and he would be able to track Robbie MacPherson down and make the ass see reason, that or kill him. At least he wouldn’t have to worry that his wife would try to protect him and attack MacPherson herself.
When Sinjun went downstairs the following morning, Colin was already gone. She stared at Philpot, the Kinross butler, and said blankly, “He left already?”
“Aye, my lady, with the sun.”
“Well, blessed hell,” Sinjun said, and walked to the dining room.
Sinjun was staring up at the Kinross coat of arms above the huge fireplace in the medieval central section of the house. Three silver lions were painted on a shield of gold. Two larger lions were holding the shield upright, and a griffin flew atop. It said beneath the shield: Wounded But Unconquered.
She laughed. It was a wonderful motto and at the moment, with the soreness still in evidence between her thighs, it was even somewhat apt for her.
“Fiona always liked the Kinross coat of arms, but she never laughed that I remember.”
Sinjun turned to face Serena. She smiled. “The motto just reminds me of something. I had thought to fetch Philip and Dahling after lunch. Do you know their schedule?”
“Aunt Arleth has the headache. Philip and Dahling are probably riding roughshod over Dulcie.”
“Goodness, I wish I’d known. If you will excuse me, Serena, I’ll go see to them.”
“He won’t ever love you, you know.”
That was plain speaking, Sinjun thought, staring at the woman. “Why not? I’m not a bad person nor am I ugly, even though it pleases Dahling to think so.”
“He loves another,” Serena said, her voice verging on the dramatic.
Sinjun nearly laughed. She pressed her hand against her breast and breathed, “Another?”
“He loves another,” Serena said again, and walked like a graceful princess from the huge Tudor entrance hall.
Sinjun could only shake her head. She was waylaid on her way to the nursery by the housekeeper, Mrs. Seton, a lady with very dark eyes and thick dark eyebrows that very nearly met over her eyes. She was the wife of Mr. Seton, a very important man in the local kirk, Colin had mentioned to her, and also the Kinross steward. Sinjun gave her a bright smile.
“My lady, I understand—indeed, all understand—that we are no longer in Dire Straits.”
“This is true. His lordship is in Edinburgh right now to pull us all out of the River Styx.”
Mrs. Seton drew a deep breath. “Good. Vere Castle has been my home all my life. It’s disgraceful, all this neglect.”
Sinjun thought of Philip and Dahling and decided they could happily torment Dulcie for a little while longer. “Why don’t I come to your rooms, Mrs. Seton, for a nice spot of tea? We can make a list of what we need.”
A list. Then it had to be approved by Colin. What an absurdity. What did Colin know of bed linens or draperies or rents in chair fabrics or dishes and pans?
“Then you must tell me where we can go to replace all that we need.”
She thought Mrs. Seton would burst into tears. Her thin cheeks filled out and turned quite pink with pleasure. “Oh aye, my lady, oh aye, indeed!”
“I also notice that the servants aren’t garbed all that well. Is there a good seamstress in Kinross? The children need new clothes, as well.”
“Oh aye, my lady! We’ll go to Kinross—a small village just at the other end of the loch. Everything we’ll need will be there right and tight. No need to go to Edinburgh or Dundee, good enough goods up here, ye’ll see.”
“Colin won’t like you interfering like this. You have just arrived, you don’t really belong here, and yet you’re trying to take over. I won’t have it.”
Sinjun winked at Mrs. Seton before turning to Aunt Arleth. “I had thought you prostrate with the headache, ma’am.”
Aunt Arleth’s lips thinned. “I roused myself because I was afraid of what you might do.”
“Do begin the list, Mrs. Seton. I shall join you in your sitting room shortly. Oh yes, I should like to inspect all the
servants’ rooms as well.”
“Yes, my lady,” Mrs. Seton said, and her departing walk was brisk with energy.
“Now, Aunt Arleth, what would you like to do?”
“Do? Whatever do you mean?”
“I mean, do you intend to keep sniping at me? Do you intend to continue in your unpleasant vein so that all are made miserable by your behavior?”
“You’re a young girl! How dare you speak to me like that?”
“I am Colin’s wife. I am the countess of Ashburnham. If I wish to tell you to go to the devil, Aunt Arleth, I am within my rights to tell you to.”
Aunt Arleth looked so flushed Sinjun was momentarily concerned that she’d overdone her dose of honesty and the good lady would swoon at her feet with palpitations. But then the lady got herself well in hand. Aunt Arleth was made of sterner stuff, and Sinjun realized it fully when the lady said, “You are from a privileged, wealthy family. You are English. You don’t understand what it’s like to see everything rot around you. You haven’t the least idea what it’s like to see the crofters’ children crying with hunger. And yet you come here and flaunt your money and expect all of us to fall at your feet.”
“I don’t believe I expected that at all,” Sinjun said slowly. “What I expected was to be given a fair chance. You don’t know me, ma’am. You are spouting generalities that rarely have anything to do with anyone. Please, can’t we try to live in peace? Can you not just give me a chance?”
“You are very young.”
“Yes, but I daresay that I will add to my age as the years progress.”
“You are also too smart, young lady!”
“My brothers taught me well, ma’am.”
“Colin doesn’t belong here as the earl of Ashburnham. He is a younger son, and he refused to obey his father, refused to join with the Emperor.”
“I’m very relieved that he didn’t have anything to do with Napoléon. However, Colin did oblige his father. He stopped the feud with the MacPhersons by marrying Fiona. Isn’t that true?”
“Aye, but then look what happened—he killed the bitch. Tossed her over the edge of that cliff, then pretended he didn’t know what had happened, pretended he didn’t remember. Oh aye, and now he’s the laird and the MacPhersons are out for blood again.”
The Sherbrooke Series Novels 1-5 Page 83