“The pill failed and the condom leaked?” Zady rolled her eyes. “Yeah, right. In case you forgot, I’m a nurse.”
“It turned out that Bethany only took the pill sporadically. But I’ll admit, I got careless, too. We were both responsible.”
Even on a Sunday, there was a steady stream of cars and trucks on the road, but having a passenger enabled Nick to use the carpool lane. He accelerated onto a soaring single-lane overpass, swooping above regular traffic.
“Having fun?” Zady asked.
Taking the hint, he eased off the gas. “Too fast?”
“I left my stomach back on the 55,” Zady said. “However, I appreciate the illustration of how you approach relationships—full speed ahead.”
“Unfair,” he protested.
“Finish the story.”
Blending into the carpool lane on Interstate 5, Nick dredged up more memories from that difficult period. “When Bethany told me she was pregnant, I did what I figured was the right thing. I asked her to marry me.”
Zady regarded him skeptically. “A romantic proposal with flowers, a ring and so forth?”
“More of a ‘we should get married’ proposal,” Nick admitted.
“And to your astonishment, she declined.”
“She insisted on placing the baby for adoption.”
“You didn’t object?”
“I had no right to pressure her,” he said. “How could I insist Bethany do what I wasn’t prepared for—raise a child alone?”
“It’s hard to face the consequences of your actions,” she murmured.
About to protest this slur on his character, Nick hesitated. There was some truth to it, he supposed. He’d reached quite a few major decisions without fully considering where they might lead. While many had worked out well, that had been due as much to luck as to his merits.
When asked why he became an obstetrician, he generally responded that nothing compared to the adrenaline rush of delivering a baby. But the real story was more complicated.
While his decision to become a doctor had sprung in part from his passion for science, Marshall’s determination to study medicine had provided the crucial impetus. If his cousin could do it, so could Nick.
He’d proved that by gaining admission to medical school and excelling in his classes. As for his specialty, during his training, he’d been surprised at how many of his classmates picked a field because it offered a regular schedule. Among the most popular had been radiology, dermatology and anesthesiology. Few were willing to pursue obstetrics, with its irregular hours, stressful demands and life-and-death urgency.
As a workaholic, Nick didn’t object to the hours, and he believed women deserved excellent medical care. He’d never regretted selecting this specialty.
Yet he hadn’t truly fallen in love with babies until he’d held Caleb in his arms, a week after the birth when Bethany had finally allowed him to visit. The precious little guy, helpless and innocent and filled with untold possibilities, had sneaked right into Nick’s heart and laid claim to it, forever.
“I’m still sorting out the consequences of becoming a father,” he conceded in response to Zady’s remark.
“What changed Bethany’s mind about adoption?”
“Her parents,” he said. “The Carrigans showered her with attention and gifts, pointing out that this might be their only grandchild. Which turned out to be true.”
“Gilt and guilt. That first one was without the u,” she noted.
“Got it.”
“Tell me about the Carrigans,” Zady said. “I need to be prepared.”
Images sprang to mind: Benjamin Carrigan, or Bennie, was reticent and solemn except when gazing with adoration at his grandson. And Elaine had a round face that had made her appear warm and motherly until lately, when she always seemed to be scheming.
“He’s a retired stockbroker. She was his office manager.” Occupations didn’t sum up a person, but they provided clues—in this case, important ones. “Bethany was raised with a gorgeous home, new cars and trips to Europe.”
“What kind of work did she do?”
“She attended classes at Cal State Fullerton but never graduated.” Nick had trouble understanding that lack of focus, but then, Bethany’s parents had been quick to write checks for her when money ran short. “She held a range of jobs—waitressing, salesclerking and so on, but none of them stuck.”
“Dare I guess that Caleb’s growing up indulged, as well?” she queried.
Indulged. That was a kinder word than spoiled. Still, it would be hard to resist doting on that cute kid. “In a good way. Last Christmas, the house was full of great food, music and love, although everyone missed Bethany terribly.”
The Carrigans had kindly invited Nick to join them on Christmas morning. Elaine had fixed an egg-and-cheese casserole and baked gingerbread, while Bennie had played old favorites on the piano. A glittering pine tree had spread its branches above a pile of presents.
“My parents mostly fought on Christmas,” Zady said wistfully. “And just about every other day.”
“Mine, too.” Much as his father’s desertion had hurt, it had provided a measure of relief from frequent arguments. “Did they divorce?”
“Dad stuck around, but he drank. I found out later that he cheated on my mom, too,” Zady said. “Sorry for dredging this up. It’s water under the bridge.”
“I gather we both grew up under the same bridge, like trolls,” he observed.
“And I picked a troll to have a ten-year relationship with.” Her nose wrinkled. “I wish I understood more about relationships and parenting.”
That was true for Nick, too. “I have to admit, I can’t imagine snatching Caleb from Bennie and Elaine to live in an apartment with whatever overnight care I can scare up.”
They exited the freeway and followed surface streets to the semirural community of La Habra Heights. Large lots, many used for raising horses, lay along winding roads, with scattered trees sheltering houses that varied from small adobes to Tudor-style mansions.
Rounding a corner, Nick spotted the familiar carriage-shaped mailbox that stood at the entrance to the Carrigans’ property. Their long, gravel-covered driveway led through jacarandas and evergreens to a hilltop home.
Christmas lights still wreathed the front of the two-story house. The roof was missing several shingles—possibly loosened in the storm that had struck ten days ago—and a shutter hung at an odd angle.
It had been nearly a month since Nick had visited the house. Since then, Elaine and Caleb had met him at a park once, and on another occasion she’d dropped the boy off at Nick’s old apartment. Then there’d been last week’s puppet show.
“Does it usually look like this?” Zady asked.
“Not even close.”
Something was definitely wrong.
Chapter Six
Mounting the porch steps, which creaked badly, Zady regretted pressuring Nick to drop his idea of claiming his son. She’d been overly influenced by her concern about Linda.
When Zady had donated her eggs, she’d pictured the child being raised under idyllic circumstances, but that didn’t give her the right to go back on her word. By contrast, Nick had legal custody. If he chose to provide a home for his son, he could do so. Maybe that was in Caleb’s best interest.
Life had a habit of zigging when you expected it to zag. They both had to deal with the unexpected as best they could.
They rang the bell and it echoed inside the house. Light footsteps pattered on the floor, and the door opened to reveal a small, dark-haired figure gazing up joyfully. “Daddy!”
Caleb flung himself into Nick’s arms. The tall man swung his son around, raising a storm of giggles from the boy. The love radiating from Nick filled Zady with nostalgic yearning. Sh
e couldn’t have said whether it was for her father or for the man she used to imagine someday marrying.
They stepped into a formal entrance hall lined with flowered wallpaper, while crown molding framed several interior doorways. A curving staircase rose to the second floor. The only furniture was a white Regency side table below a framed mirror.
The stooped figure of a woman moved toward them from the interior. She should be using a cane, Zady thought, and guessed that their hostess was trying to avoid showing weakness.
“Caleb, please don’t answer the door until I reach it,” she reproved the boy gently. “Nick, it’s good to see you and your, uh, friend.”
“You did get my email that Zady was accompanying me?” Nick set Caleb on the wooden floor. After receiving a nod, he introduced the two women.
“Pleased to meet you.” Elaine Carrigan didn’t offer to shake hands, and Zady noted that her fingers were bent with arthritis. That accounted for the cobweb in one corner of the mirror and the scuffed state of the floor. But if these people were as wealthy as Nick had indicated, why not employ a cleaning service?
“Caleb, this is my friend Zady,” Nick told the three-year-old. “She’s eager to meet you.”
Zady smiled down at him. “I’m a nurse. I work at the Safe Harbor Medical Center with your father.”
“You’re a nurse?” Elaine regarded her with increased interest.
“I assist Nick’s cousin Marshall,” she said.
“Hi, Zady.” Caleb drew out the vowels in her name. “That’s funny. Zay-dee. Zay-dee.”
“Don’t be disersp...disrespectful, young man.” His grandmother looked annoyed that she’d stumbled over the word.
“Zay-dee!” the child sang out and skipped toward the nearest doorway.
“Caleb! Not the living room. Let’s join Grandpa in the den.” When the boy obediently changed course, Elaine followed slowly.
Nick was frowning. Obviously, he had concerns, also.
Elaine and Caleb led them to a large room with tall windows. Against the far wall, an upright piano stood with its keyboard covered and a book of holiday songs in the music rack. Dark antiques dominated the room, brightened by a child-size table covered with crayons and paper.
From an armchair, a heavyset man rose stiffly. “I’m Bennie Carrigan.” He extended a hand to Zady, who introduced herself as she shook hands with him. “A pleasure to meet you, young lady. Nick’s new friend, I gather?”
“Colleague and neighbor,” Nick added.
While Caleb danced about, displaying toys for their admiration, Zady performed a surreptitious assessment of the boy’s grandfather. Bennie’s genial expression didn’t hide the sadness in his dark eyes. He’d undergone tragedy this past year, but the loss of his daughter hadn’t caused the puffiness in his neck or the effort it clearly took for him to remain upright.
Surely Nick hadn’t missed the signs of illness, either. This must be recent, or else the pair had disguised their problems on Christmas.
Elaine didn’t offer refreshments. That was fine with Zady, who’d rather not impose any more than necessary.
“If you’d like to take Caleb outside to play, feel free,” Elaine told them. Through the windows, Zady glimpsed a swing set and a slide on the shaggy rear lawn. Judging by the accumulation of leaves, none of it had been cleaned recently.
Nick, who’d been tussling with the boy, drew his son into a hug. “Caleb, I need to speak to your grandparents alone. Zady, would you play with Caleb in his room?”
“No! I want Daddy!” The little boy blew out cheekfuls of air. Judging by his defiant stance, he was on the verge of throwing a tantrum.
“I could read to you,” Zady offered.
His nose twitched. “Maybe.”
Nick slanted Zady a grateful look before turning to Elaine. “Can we talk?”
When the older woman didn’t respond, Zady feared she might refuse Nick’s request. Then her husband spoke. “I believe this conversation is overdue.”
The grandmother pressed her lips together before relenting. “Very well.”
“Will you show me your room, Caleb?” Zady asked the little boy. “You can pick your favorite book.”
“Okay.” With a reproachful glance at his father, he trotted ahead to the staircase.
Zady was glad she’d accompanied Nick today, if only to keep his son busy. As they mounted the steps beside a stair-lift track, she heard the rumble of voices from the den. After what she’d witnessed, it seemed inevitable that Nick would have to take physical custody of his son. Had he considered what challenges lay ahead?
Zady would never forget one weekend not long after Dwayne had left his wife and moved with her twenty-year-old self to Santa Barbara. He’d brought his three young children for a weekend at their apartment, dumping them on Zady with little notice while he worked a construction job.
The smallest had been younger than Caleb was now, and the others close in age. That tumultuous weekend, with Zady increasingly overwhelmed and the resentful youngsters running out of control, had set the tone for years of conflict.
Upstairs, landscape paintings lined the hall, off which opened four doors. She caught a medicinal smell along with the rank scent of unwashed sheets. Zady’s stomach clenched, not from revulsion but from sorrow. These people must be in serious difficulty.
Caleb’s room occupied a sunny corner, with a view over the woods where evergreens softened the starkness of bare winter branches. A child-size bed, its headboard painted with fairy-tale characters, sported a patchwork quilt thrown over bunched sheets.
A laundry basket atop the bureau held a pile of clean, folded clothes. Books spilled from shelves, while an open cabinet displayed a jumble of toys and games.
Caleb plucked several books from the mess. “These are my favorites.”
“Oh, I love these, too.” Zady sank onto the floor, brushing aside scattered pieces from a children’s game. As she did, a framed photo on the table caught her gaze.
Downstairs, several family pictures had included this same dark-haired young woman, whom she assumed was Bethany, but Zady had been reluctant to pay obvious attention. The subject of their daughter might be painful to the Carrigans.
In this portrait, Bethany glowed with personality. Those bright blue eyes were mesmerizing, and a mischievous smile invited friendship. “Is that your mommy?”
“Yeah.” Caleb plopped beside her with a book. “Can you do voices?” He held out Winnie-the-Pooh.
“It wouldn’t be a good story without voices,” Zady responded, taking the well-worn book.
She jumped into the delightful tale and was pleased by Caleb’s giggling responses as she altered her tone to suit each character. What a cutie! When he nestled against her, Zady slipped an arm around the little guy.
From time to time, she picked up the murmur of voices from below. What was being decided? Perhaps the Carrigans and Nick were reaching a compromise.
When Caleb’s interest drifted from the story, Zady joined him in playing with teddy bears. That activity didn’t last long, either.
“Tell me what you do every day,” she suggested. “Do you go to preschool?”
He nodded. “The bus picks me up.”
“Have you learned your colors?”
“Yes.” Caleb pointed at objects to demonstrate, and was able to count to ten, too. He chattered for a while about his little friends, jumping from topic to topic until he had to use the bathroom.
“I’m potty trained,” he informed her proudly.
“Great.” That was one chore Nick wouldn’t have to worry about. “Is there a second bathroom I can use?”
“In Grandpa’s room.” From the hall, he pointed it out. “I’m not ʼlowed in there. Or Grandma’s room, either.” He didn’t indicate which of the other doors led to Ela
ine’s room.
“I’ll wait till you’re done.” Zady didn’t wish to intrude into either of the Carrigans’ private spaces.
Standing in the hall, she experienced a sense of strangeness. What was she doing here, mixed up in the personal affairs of a man she barely knew?
Under other circumstances, she’d have been attracted to Nick, with his strong masculine presence and sense of humor. But in addition to his troubled relationship with Marshall, his situation as a single father marked him as off limits.
Moving to Safe Harbor had been the first step of Zady’s plan to reclaim her life. She’d wasted her twenties on a selfish man, his ungrateful kids and a ridiculous feud with her twin fed by their mother’s insecurity. Since changing jobs last fall, she’d begun to reestablish herself and, after a frank talk with Zora, built a closer relationship with her sister.
They’d joined forces to keep their manipulative mother at arm’s length. The fact that she’d remarried and moved to Oregon simplified matters, as she could hardly expect to be included in their daily activities.
Zady’s thirtieth birthday had reinforced her determination to proceed with the next step: establishing a family of her own. No more secondhand men or secondhand children, either. So, although her heart went out to Caleb, she had no desire to take on someone else’s problems.
Then again, no one had asked her to. She was helping a friend today, nothing more.
Fidgeting in the hall as Caleb lingered in the bathroom, she studied another photo of Bethany, basking in sunlight. Why had the young woman rejected Nick’s proposal? Granted, a pregnancy alone wasn’t a good enough reason to marry, yet with his warmth and love for his son, he had husband potential. And Bethany must have recognized the guy’s sexy appeal. What was he like in bed?
Get a grip! That might be easier if she weren’t standing here growing antsier by the minute. Urgent need overtaking her qualms, Zady gritted her teeth and darted through Bennie’s bedroom, trying to ignore the unmade bed...whoa. An oxygen tank? She’d have to think about the implications of that later.
The Doctor's Accidental Family Page 6