by Ana Huang
“Hmmm…”Venice sounded thoughtful. “Well, I think the solution is pretty obvious.”
I immediately sat up straight. “Really?” I asked eagerly. “What’s the solution?”
“Just have someone pretend to be your boyfriend!”
My face fell in disappointment. “Venice, can you come up with a plausible solution? How am I supposed to find a fake boyfriend? Everyone hates me!”
“Well…they don’t hate you…”
I snorted. “Yeah, uh…you weren’t at school this past week.” The instant the words left my mouth, I regretted it. I didn’t want to make Venice feel guilty for not being there. I mean, it’s not like she could help it—she had the flu.
Venice was quiet for a moment. “I know,” she said, sounding slightly tearful. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help you out, really! I know it must’ve been hell for you but—“
“V, it’s ok,” I interrupted, feeling quite guilty myself. She was a good friend, and I didn’t want her to think otherwise. “It’s fine. I can handle it.”
Venice sniffled. “I know you’re strong Maya, but—I just—“ She let out a loud sigh. “You’re—you’re not going to withdraw from school, are you?”
“No way in hell!” I answered vehemently. “I’m not going to let Roman Fiori have that satisfaction.”
“Well, if you survived this long, I’m sure they’ll get bored soon,” Venice pointed out, sounding hopeful and relieved. “And then it wouldn’t be so bad.”
“I guess. Right now, I’m more worried about my grandmother. You’ve never met her, but let me tell you, Asian grandmothers are not to be messed with.”
“Just take my advice and find a fake boyfriend!”
“Like who?”
She paused. “Well…that cute guy from the party, James, asked for your number…”
I was horrified. “You want me to ask James to be my fake boyfriend? I barely even know him!”
“So? It’s not like you’re really dating! Although you guys would make a cute couple.”
I rolled my eyes. Venice never got tired of trying to set me up with someone.
“By the way, did he ever call you?”
“Oh. Uh…yeah,” I admitted reluctantly. I still haven’t told her about my little adventure with Roman and Carlo today.
“And?! What happened? Give me all the details!” Venice gushed, sounding completely recovered at the mention of the phone call.
I had no choice but to recount the story of what happened this afternoon. Knowing Venice, she was going to find out anyway.
“Wait, you went to Roman Fiori’s house?” she squealed when I’d finished. “And Carlo Tevasco gave you a ride home? Maya, that’s great!”
I pulled the phone away from my ear and stared at it.
Sometimes, Venice just amazed me. She really did. “What part of being kidnapped is great?”
“That part where your kidnapper is the most gorgeous guy on earth,” she retorted. “Hey, maybe Roman or Carlo can pretend to be your boyfriend!”
I almost choked on my own spit at the sheer ridiculousness of the idea. “Yeah, right,” I snorted. “First of all, need I remind you Roman and I don’t actually get along? He’s the reason why I’ve spent all my allowance money on dry cleaning! Plus, and you can quote me on this, the day Roman Fiori becomes my boyfriend—whether real or fake—is the day hell freezes over.”
* * *
Something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong.
I shot a pointed look at the petite brunette who had been glaring at me for the past half hour, and she turned away with a huff.
Weird. Actually, this whole week had been weird.
I came to school Monday expecting more abuse, but instead I’d gotten…nothing. Oh, sure, there’d been stares and whispers, but there had been no pranks, no nasty messages scrawled on my locker, nothing thrown on me.
It actually creeped me out a lot more than any snake or thrown food could.
When the bell finally rang, I was torn between relief and dread. On the one hand, it was always good to get out of Valesca as fast as I could; on the other, my grandmother was going to be waiting at home, and I still hadn’t figured out a way to ward off her matchmaking advances.
I grabbed my bag and pushed past the other students, ignoring their silent stares. Well, if they’d all had brain transplants or something last weekend, that wasn’t my problem.
“Hey, Maya!”
I turned, my jaw dropping when I saw who it was.
“So, where are you heading?” Parker asked casually, like we’d been friends forever or something.
“Uh…home.” I eyed him suspiciously, gripping the strap of my backpack tighter and increasing my pace. Sadly, since I was a whole head shorter than him, he managed to match my pace perfectly.
“Want a ride?”
I rolled my eyes. Why were all the Scions trying to give me rides lately?
“No thanks.”
“Are you sure? Because it looks like it’s about to rain,” Parker cautioned, opening the door for me and tilting his chin in the direction of the sky, which did look alarmingly gray and stormy.
I bit my lip. Usually, I don’t mind walking in the rain, but with my grandmother here, I didn’t need another lecture on how I never took care of myself, how I was going to get sick, blah blah blah.
“Come on, you know you want to,” Parker cajoled with a charming smile.
Well, I guess he’d never outright been mean to me. Actually, he’d been pretty nice about the whole beer thing…
“Fine. Thanks,” I conceded grudgingly. I couldn’t believe I was willingly getting into a car with Parker Remington, the biggest player since Casanova.
Maybe I’d fallen and smacked my head on the pavement but just didn’t remember it. Because, you know, I had smacked my head on the pavement.
“This is turning out to be a bit of a pattern, isn’t it?” Parker asked, sounding amused as he pulled out of the parking lot.
“What is?” I shrugged out of my hot, itchy blazer. For something so expensive, it sure wasn’t very comfortable.
“Getting rides home every Friday. Carlo told me what happened.”
“Trust me, it wasn’t like I had a choice,” I huffed. Ok, I had more of a choice with Carlo than Roman, but still.
I hesitated, then before I could lose my nerve, asked, “What’s going on with everyone?”
“What do you mean?”
“Why is everyone being…nicer? If that’s the right word.”
“You mean, why aren’t they shoving snakes in your locker?”
I shuddered slightly at the memory. I hated reptiles. “Yeah.”
“I have no idea.”
I shot Parker a disbelieving look. “You’re Parker Remington. You should know everything!”
“I should,” he agreed. “But I don’t. That’s more Roman’s forte, and maybe Zack’s. He kind of a gossiper.”
I couldn’t help but snicker. I may not know him, but Zack did seem like that type.
“Well, then, why are you being so nice to me?” I asked.
We stopped at a red light and he turned to give me a heart-melting smile. I actually felt my knees weaken. Although I may not like the Scions—and that was putting it lightly—it didn’t mean I was dead. Parker was charming and good-looking enough to elicit a physical reaction from any living, breathing girl.
“Why do you think?” he asked, holding my gaze for several intense seconds.
A warm blush crept up on my cheeks. He was good, I’ll give him that.
I turned away. “Because you want to get in my pants?” I asked cheekily, trying to recover.
Parker let out a loud laugh. “Well, I’ve never heard a girl say that quite so bluntly before.” The light turned green, and he stepped on the gas. “Besides, I’m a guy. I want to get into every girl’s pants. Or skirt.” He raised his eyebrows at my bare legs.
I tugged down the hem of my skirt. “At least you’re honest.”
He shrugged. “I’m always honest. I don’t see why people lie. It’s never a good idea in the long run.”
"I agree." I eyed him thoughtfully. “You know, you aren’t as horrible as I thought.” That was another worrying pattern that had emerged lately.
“Thanks.” His tone was wry. “That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”
“You’re welcome.” I smiled sweetly. I couldn’t believe I was actually entertained by my conversation with Parker, but I was. “Oh, actually, you can let me off right here.”
“Here?” Parker blinked. “But we’re not at your house yet. We’re at a daycare center.” As if on cue, a ponytailed girl who was obviously a nanny walked out with a pair of adorable but fudge-covered twins in tow. “Is there something you forgot to tell everyone?”
“No!” I rolled my eyes. “I’m only seventeen! But…I just don’t want my parents asking questions about who you are and stuff. It’s been a long day.”
He shrugged. “Your wish is my command.” Parker tipped an imaginary hat at me.
I laughed. “Thanks for the ride,” I said almost shyly. Then I smirked. “But you’re never getting into my pants. Or skirt.”
With that, I slammed the door shut, but not before Parker’s laugh made its way into my ears.
When I arrived at my house, I wasn’t surprised to see my mom’s car out front. She’d probably just picked up my grandmother from the airport.
Taking a deep breath, I slowly opened the door and entered the living room.
I immediately saw my grandmother sitting on the couch, wearing a pair of gray pants and a black Mao-style shirt with red flowers that buttoned up her neck.
My mom fluttered nervously around her, looking jittery. She’d obviously consumed even more coffee than usual in preparation for this visit. “Oh, good Maya, you’re home.” She sounded massively relieved, which was far from how I felt.
“Maya, let me look at you,” my grandmother said with a heavy Asian accent, standing up and eyeing me critically from head to toe. “You gain weight? Your butt so big.”
My face turned beet red. “No, grandma. I didn't gain weight. How was your flight?” I asked, trying to deflect the attention from my butt.
“Good, good. Come, I show you something.” She pulled me over to the couch and pushed a stack of pictures into my lap.
She was never was one for formal greetings.
“I found perfect boy for you,” my grandmother promised, shoving one of the pictures under my nose. “He very good. Will be doctor someday. Going to Harvard, very smart boy.”
I took the picture from her hands and stared down at the skinny, gawky Asian boy wearing a highly unfortunate sweater vest. “Uh…I’m sure he’s very nice, grandma, but he’s not really my type.”
My grandmother snatched the picture and replaced it with one of another Asian boy, this one with a huge grin that showed off a mouth of crooked teeth. He was standing on a pier and holding a giant fish in one hand. “Not best picture, but he very handsome. He want to be lawyer.”
I shook my head.
My grandmother frowned. “You no like Asian boys? Maya, you part Asian!”
“It’s not that I don’t like Asian boys, grandma, it’s just that—“ I shot a desperate, help-me look at my mother.
“Mom, why don’t we let Maya rest for bit?” my mom suggested. “She must be tired from school. And you must be tired, too.”
My grandmother let out an indignant sniff. “I seventy, not ninety! Not tired yet. Maya cannot wait. She seventeen! If she no find boyfriend soon, she will be old maid.” She rummaged through the pile of photos. “If you no like Asians, I have very good-looking white boy. He looks a bit like, what is his name? Ah, Carrot Top? But he will be good hus—“
“No!” I nearly shouted.
“What you mean, no?” My grandmother looked highly insulted.
“Uh, I mean, no, I don’t need to meet any of the boys because…um…” I gulped. “Uh…I already have a boyfriend!”
“You do?” My mom and grandmother chorused.
I gave my mom another look. “Uh…yeah. We’ve been dating for…for a month!”
“Really?” My grandmother narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “What’s his name?”
“Um…it’s…uh…”
At that moment, the doorbell rang, and I nearly shot out of my seat. Saved by the bell! “I’ll get it!” With that, I ran to the door and yanked it open. I blinked. “Parker?”
“Hey.” He gave me another one of those devastating grins. “You forgot this.” He held up my blazer.
I had completely forgotten about that. “Oh, thanks,” I breathed, taking the jacket from him. “You didn’t have to come all the way here to bring this to me.”
“I was already pretty close, remember?” Parker pushed his shades on top of his head. “Since I was such a gentleman, I think I deserve a dinner date, don’t you?”
I gripped the doorknob tightly. “Parker, this isn’t the best time—“
“Maya? Who’s at the door?”
Crap. “No one, grandma,” I called sweetly. “I—“
Ignoring me, my grandmother came over and nudged me aside. She stared disapprovingly at Parker. “Why you bother my granddaughter?”
“Good afternoon, miss,” Parker said smoothly, not seeming at all fazed. “I just came by to give Maya her jacket back.”
My grandmother propped her hands on her hips, looking like a tiny Asian Napoleon. “Why you have Maya’s jacket?” she demanded. “And I no miss. I seventy! You smooth-talking playbooks—“
“Playboys,” I whispered.
She ignored me. “You smooth-talking playbooks, I no trust you.” Then she turned and jabbed a finger at me. “Maya! You have sex with strange boy in car?”
“Grandma!” I yelled, absolutely mortified.
Parker coughed and covered his mouth with a fist, obviously trying to hide the huge grin that was spreading across his face.
Well, it was nice to see someone found this situation amusing.
“I didn’t have sex with him! He just gave me a ride home from school!”
“Why you get ride from strange boys?” My grandmother glared at my mom. “This how you raise daughter?”
My mom just looked bewildered. She obviously had no idea what was going on. Actually, neither did I.
“No, he’s not a strange boy!” I was desperate to make this stop. “He’s—uh…“ Suddenly, I had a lightbulb moment. “He’s my boyfriend!”
My mom, grandmother, and Parker all whipped their heads around to stare at me in shock. They spoke at the same time.
“He is?”
“You are?”
“I am?”
I smiled sweetly and reached out to grab Parker’s hand, squeezing it tighter than normal. “Yes. This is Parker. He was the boyfriend I told you about.”
“Really?” My grandmother looked Parker over. “You stay for dinner,” she pronounced regally. “I have questions for you.”
Parker looked at me and raised his eyebrows.
I widened my eyes, sending him telepathic pleas. Please, please say yes. Please say yes. I’ll do anything. I’ll wash your car, walk your dog, if you have a dog—
“Of course. I’m looking forward to it.” Parker sounded completely sincere.
Someone had some experience bullshitting. Still, if there was anyone who would make a great fake boyfriend, it was the womanizing Parker Remington. Easy on the eyes, charming, and I won't have to worry about either of us falling for the other.
“I guess I’m staying for dinner,” he whispered into my ear, following my grandmother into the house. “You owe me, by the way. Especially since I don’t even really know you.”
“I know. And it’s not like that stopped you from offering me a ride home,” I whispered back. “But thank you.”
“I have an idea of how you can repay me…” He waggled his eyebrows.
I wrinkled my nose. “Ugh! You’re such a perv.�
�
“It’s in my nature, sweetheart. I am unbelievably charming.”
I snorted. “And amazingly modest.”
He just smiled at me innocently. "Don't forget about that goodbye kiss you need to give me at the end of the night, if you want your grandmother to believe we're an item."
I groaned. This was going to be a long night.