Halfway through the sermon, she couldn’t keep it to herself anymore. She leaned over to Matt who was half asleep next to her, and whispered, “Jacob’s coming to visit.”
His eyes popped open and he smiled. “That’s great! When?” he whispered back.
“Next weekend.”
Kate heard her mother, sitting at the end of the pew, clear her throat loud enough for her two chatty children to hear. Kate glanced her way and Mom met her stare. Just to show she wasn’t so easily commanded, Kate leaned back to Matt and whispered again.
“I can’t wait!” she said to Matt. Mom cleared her throat again and this time, Kate obeyed and quieted down. Kate felt she had made her point. Looking the other way, she noticed Marie was smiling at her, a devilish little smile indeed.
*
As soon as the Gilberts had crossed themselves and were leaving the church, Marie exploded with the news.
“Jacob’s coming to visit! Jacob’s coming to visit!”
“You little jerk!” Kate said, grabbing the ten year old’s hair and giving it a yank. “That was my news!”
“Ow! Mom, Kate pulled my hair!” Marie said, pleadingly.
Mom, for once, ignored Marie’s entreaty and instead looked at Kate. “Is it true?”
“Yes, he’s coming to next weekend so can go to the Autumn Ball with me,” Kate said, beaming.
“Oh, Kate, that’s terrific,” Mom said and threw her arm around Kate’s shoulders as they descended the church steps. She paused for a moment, and then said, “What do you say we go and find you a dress today?”
“Really?” Kate asked, startled by the suggestion. Kate and her mother didn’t do things like this. They just didn’t shop together.
“Yeah, after lunch we’ll go to the mall and get you a dress that will knock his socks off. What do you say?”
“Sure, that sounds okay,” Kate said calmly, trying to convince her mother and herself that it didn’t matter either way to her, but inside, she was feeling good.
“Can I come?” Lucy asked.
“You’re not going to the Ball. You don’t need a dress,” Kate pointed out.
“I know, but I want to help you find a dress,” Lucy said, wounded.
Mom said, “No, Lucy, this is just for Kate and me.” She smiled at Kate, and Kate couldn’t help herself. She smiled back.
*
After the usual chaos of Sunday dinner, Mom and her eldest daughter drove to the mall to find the perfect dress.
They made small talk. Kate chatted about school and homework and friends. Mom mostly listened, but also related some tales from her new job. Kate tried on dress after dress. She spun around for Mom’s opinion. It was almost pleasant, Kate thought. Mom even got a little silly, especially when Kate tried on a dress that was too big in the bosom.
“We could just stuff a few socks in there, Kate. It would be stunning!”
“Mom!” she laughed. She found a few good dresses on a rack and was ready to head for the dressing room when Mom dropped a bombshell.
“Katie.” Mom hadn’t called her Katie in a long time. This can’t be good.
“Yeah?”
“Are you and Jacob having sex?”
Kate whipped her head around and stared at her mother, the gowns still clasped in her hands.
“Mom, Jacob and I don’t even live in the same state. It would be pretty hard for us to have sex.” Kate said, hoping her weak attempt at humor would sidetrack her mother from this conversation.
“You know what I mean.”
She couldn’t believe she was having this conversation, much less outside a dressing room. Kate’s face felt hot. She bit her bottom lip, then said, “No.”
Kate could almost see her mother’s blood pressure dropping. She reached over and grabbed her daughter’s hand and held it tightly, smiling. Kate was uncomfortable with this gesture, but she did not pull her hand away. Not yet, anyway.
“You know that I do not approve of pre-marital sex, but Jacob is a man now. At some point, he’s going to want to move the relationship to a new level.” Here, Mom paused, as if to gain the courage to continue. “I just want you to know, that if you two decide to have sex in the future, let me know and I will get you some birth control.” She spit these last words out as if they were tacks in her mouth.
Kate stood in stunned silence. She desperately wanted to be somewhere, anywhere else. Finally, she managed to choke out some words. “Don’t worry, Mom. I’m not ready to have sex and Jacob knows it. I can handle Jacob,” she added with an uncomfortable nod.
“I have no doubt that you can, but I just want you to know that I’m here for you if you need me.” Mom’s face looked almost sad.
“Okay, Mom.”
Mom nodded silently and Kate knew that the “sex talk” was over. Every once in a while, they had a similar, strained conversation. It never got easier for either of them.
She squeezed Kate’s hand. Then she put her arms around her daughter and pulled her close. Kate’s immediate discomfort gave way to a warm, childlike feeling. She felt her stress disappear. Mom just hugged it right out of her.
“Being a teenager isn’t easy, is it?” Mom asked, her chin tapping against Kate’s shoulder as she spoke. She pulled away from Kate and gave her hand another squeeze.
“Oh, it isn’t so bad.”
“I remember feeling so confused, so many different emotions, just pulling me apart.” Mom paused and sighed deeply. “I know I’m not there for you enough and that I’m hard on you, but I want you to know that I’m proud of you too.”
Kate’s face broke out into a grin. “Thanks, Mom.” They went back to examining dresses, both feeling good.
“Oh, Kate. Try this one on!” Mom said with excitement. She handed Kate a stunning gown. Kate ran her hands over the fine material and then raced to the dressing room.
*
That night, Seth left. Nobody noticed he was gone until Monday evening when Ink came out of Seth’s room and began prowling the house, meowing at anyone who would listen.
“Has anybody seen Seth today?” Mom asked, looking at the yowling cat.
A search of Seth’s room revealed a note that said, simply,
Gone to Nebraska. Be back in a couple of days. Please feed my cat.
-Seth.
Kate was stunned. She knew that Seth missed his girlfriend, or ex-girlfriend, whatever she was, but Kate felt somewhat betrayed. In the family, Seth alone knew all her scary secrets, knew about the weird happenings. Seth was her ally. And now, he was gone. She was on her own.
*
At dinner, Mom made an announcement. “I had a nice long talk with Aunt Maggie this afternoon and she wants us to come visit her in Indiana. We haven’t been to see her yet and she’s so close now, we can go visit for the weekend. So, we’re going to her house the weekend after next.”
“But Mom, that’s Halloween!” Marie shrieked.
“Oh, so it is. Well, I’m sure you can go trick-or-treating in Maggie’s neighborhood. Besides, she’d love to see you in your costume. She never got to do all this fun kid stuff. She’ll get a kick out of it.”
“Oh, okay,” Marie said with a huff.
Matt tried to look disappointed as he said he just couldn’t go.
“And why not?”
“Mom, I already made plans with the twins. I’m going to their house up in Parkersburg for the weekend.”
“What?”
“Yeah, sorry Mom. They want me to see their hometown and meet their parents.”
Mom sighed. “I’d like you to come, but you’re old enough. I guess it’s your decision.”
“Hey, wait! I don’t want to go to Aunt Maggie’s house either!” Kate wailed. It was hard to believe that Aunt Maggie was Mom’s sister. Although the two had the same parents and the same upbringing, they couldn’t be more different. Unlike Kate’s mother, who was stable, simple and practical, Aunt Maggie flitted from one fad to the next. Her latest passion was yoga and crystals. Last Christmas, she
nearly chewed Kate’s ear off talking about the benefits of vegetarianism. Kate couldn’t imagine what Aunt Maggie would be handing out to trick-or-treaters. Probably celery sticks and bran muffins.
“Kate...”
“Mom, I’m old enough too. You’ve never let me stay home before. I’m almost seventeen years old. I should be able to decide this for myself. Don’t you think?”
“Kate, I don’t know. Maggie would be so disappointed if you didn’t come.”
“Oh, Mom, she barely notices that I’m even there. She just likes to talk. She doesn’t care who listens.”
Kate’s Dad chuckled. Mom shot him a look.
“I’ve already been invited to a Halloween party, Mom. At Lisa’s. I already said I would go. I don’t want to miss it,” she lied. “You know, we just moved here and I don’t know that many people yet. This would be so much fun and I could get to know people better.” Chris was right. Parent guilt was a wonderful thing. Kate continued to lay it on thickly. “I’ve been so lonely since we moved here. Oh, and Lisa’s parents are going to be there and everything. Trust me, her parents never leave her alone.”
“Mom, I bet she’s already planning to have a big party here. Don’t let her stay,” Matt said with a smirk.
“Matt, shut up.” Kate sneered at him. She looked back at Mom, innocence all over her face. “Come on, Mom. I’m old enough. Besides, Seth will be back by then, right? He can’t stand Aunt Maggie. He won’t go.”
Mom looked resigned. “You’re probably right.” She sighed deeply and looked very tired for a moment. “Okay, Kate, but only if Seth is here. You are getting old enough. I’ll let you make your own decision.”
Kate grinned. “Thanks, Mom,” she said. Being on Mom’s good side was new for Kate. It proved very beneficial.
“We’ll talk about the rules later,” Mom said.
“I have some good news,” the usually timid Lucy said to the entire table. Her face looked ready to burst with joy and excitement. “I got asked to the Autumn Ball.”
“What?” Kate asked, astonished. “Who asked you?” The Ball was only for juniors and seniors and their guests. Lucy, as a freshman, must have been asked by a traitorous upperclassman.
“Chris,” Lucy said with a dreamy smile.
“What?” Kate screamed. “My Chris?”
“He’s not your Chris, Kate. He called me today and asked if I would be his date.” Lucy exclaimed. “I said yes.”
“Chris? Chris asked you? I can’t believe it. He can’t find a girl his own age. And one who’s not my sister?” Kate said, unbelieving. What was he thinking? Was it a joke? It had to be a joke. Chris asked her little sister to go to the Autumn Ball?
“I think it’s great, Lucy,” Dad said, toasting her with a glass of milk. “To the two prettiest girls at the dance.”
Lucy beamed at her father, obviously excited about her first formal dance. Kate growled under her breath.
Silent and angry, Kate helped clean up the kitchen and quickly retired to her room. She started writing to Jacob, but could only find herself thinking about Chris. As a last ditch effort to rid her thoughts of him, she took her pen in hand and wrote “I love Jacob.” There, that felt better. She wrote it again and again, until she had written a full page in purple ink. She added one final “I love Jacob.” She capped the pen and sat on the bed, staring at the paper.
Why did Chris make her feel so confused? She loved Jacob, but something about Chris made her heart dance a little. She liked the attention he gave her, liked it that he chased her a little bit, knowing she was not available. He was so darn cute too. How dare he ask her little sister out? She shook her head, still unbelieving. She felt betrayed. First Seth takes off for Nebraska, then Chris asks Lucy to the Autumn Ball. Doesn’t anybody care about me?
She made her way into the bathroom to brush her teeth. Minutes later, Ace’s barking brought her back, toothbrush still clutched between her teeth. Ace was cowered under the window, shaking and growling.
“What’s the matter, boy?” Kate asked as she walked toward the frightened dog. She pet him and his shaking subsided, but he never took his eyes from the bed. Curious, Kate walked over to the bed. The paper she had just filled with “I love Jacob” was torn into a million pieces, shredded into confetti. Jacob’s photo lay on the floor.
“Who did this?” she whispered. She glanced at the nervous dog, who apparently wasn’t going to tell.
*
The next morning, Kate waited to ambush Chris at his locker but, as usual, he was late. Right before the first bell, Patrick approached her.
“Hi, Kate. Hey, I forgot to tell you. I spoke to Mrs. Entwhistle again and she gave me the phone number of her Aunt Grace.”
“Who?” Kate asked a little harshly.
Patrick looked taken aback. “Grace. She was Pansy’s youngest sister. Remember? She still lives here in Huntington. I think we should ask her some questions about growing up the house and about Pansy vanishing and stuff like that.”
“Oh, yeah. Okay. Can you call her?” Kate didn’t feel like playing detective today. Her mind was too full of other things.
“Me? Uh, okay. I’ll just set up a time for us to meet with her,” Patrick said. “Hey, what’s up with you today?”
“Nothing. I’m just tired.”
“Why? Did something happen last night?”
“Nothing much. Well, there’s a lot of stuff going on right now. That, and I keep having the most horrible nightmares.”
“Really? About what?” Patrick asked. He seemed obsessed with anything creepy.
“I’ll tell you later,” she said, slamming her locker. She wasn’t in the mood to entertain his macabre tastes this morning. Probably sensing that, Patrick changed the subject.
“So, are you going to the Autumn Ball?”
Kate brightened immediately and told Patrick all about Jacob’s visit. “I’m picking him up on Thursday. I’m so excited. I can’t wait to see him. So, who are you taking to the dance?”
“I probably won’t go. Dances aren’t my thing,” Patrick said with a shrug.
“Oh, come on. You should go. Chris asked my little sister. We could all go together.”
“Chris asked your little sister?” Patrick asked with a chuckle. “Is she old enough to go to a high school dance?”
“Not Marie. No, he asked Lucy. I’m sure you’ve seen her around here. Cute, huge blue eyes that she flutters at upper-classmen? You can’t miss her.”
“No, I don’t think I’ve seen her,” he said. “Listen, I’ve got to run. I’ll call you when I set up the meeting.”
“Okay,” Kate said. As she watched him walk away, she realized that she had been rude to Patrick. She should apologize. Maybe later. The halls were emptying out as students made their way to homerooms. Right as the bell rang, Chris ran through the front door of the school.
“Chris, I need to talk to you!” Kate yelled, her voice echoing off metal lockers.
“I’m late. It’ll have to wait!” he chanted as he turned and ran up the stairs. Kate followed him, undeterred.
“Why did you ask my little sister to the dance?” she yelled as she chased him up the stairs.
“Why not? She’s cute.”
“There are lots of cute girls in this school that are not my sister. What kind of trick are you playing?”
At this, Chris stopped running from her. He turned, set his elbow on the railing and rested his chin in his hand. “Are you jealous, Miss Gilbert?”
Kate stopped and stammered. “What? No, I’m just...shocked.” The second bell rang. Now they were both late. “I’m just worried that you are playing with my sister’s feelings. She’s very innocent and very thin-skinned. You don’t know her like I know her. She’s like a…kitten, a very inexperienced kitten. And you’re the big bad wolf.”
He laughed. “I do believe you’re jealous,” he said in a high pitched voice, his West Virginia accent ringing through the now empty halls.
“I’m not jealous. St
op saying that.” She gritted her teeth. She wasn’t jealous. “I just wish you would have asked me first, to see if it was okay.”
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