I was stupid. I was screwing this whole thing up. Megan would never let me take another case; Amber would never let me near her and the baby once she was on her feet. I’d fucked everything up, and I wasn’t sure there was anything I could do to fix it.
I toweled off, thinking about Peter. What would he think of Amber living here with me, of his son here in my home? What would he think of what I’d done?
I wished that Peter had told us about Amber. I wished that I knew how he felt about her. If he was in love with her…I couldn’t stab my brother in the back like that. Even if it was just a one-night thing, it was wrong for me to be having the thoughts I was having about her.
I pulled on a pair of shorts and climbed into bed, still so lost in my thoughts that I thought I would never get to sleep. I loved Peter. He was always the one who was first to my corner when I needed support, the first one to tell me I could do something that everyone else thought was too much. And this was how I paid him back.
I was a real asshole.
Almost as proof of that, I fell right to sleep. I was lost in dreams in less than ten minutes, dreaming of Amber and her beautiful body, of the taste of her lips. It was a fevered dream that did things to me nothing had since I was fifteen and having hormone-driven dreams of adolescence. Her hands were on my chest, her fingers playing with the elastic that held my shorts around my hips. Her mouth sliding over my throat, her tongue playing a little game over the rounded mound of my Adam’s apple. And then her lips touched mine, and I moved into her, kissing her like I was drowning and she was the only source of air for miles.
It wasn’t until I tucked her body down under mine, until my hands were sliding under her thin nightie—the one Mom stole from Megan to give to her—to touch those brilliantly created breasts, that I realized this wasn’t a dream. She was really there, her hands sliding over my near naked body, her tongue dancing a little dance with mine.
I pulled back—the hardest thing I’d ever done!—and untangled myself from her touch.
“What are you doing?”
“It’s okay. I want to.”
I shook my head, scrambling out of the bed and flipping on the light.
“Amber, you don’t have to do this. I told you, what happened earlier was just me being stupid.”
“You can’t tell me you don’t want to.”
I groaned, the need burning through my body likely palpable. I mean…shit, there were things I couldn’t exactly hide from her. Not now. Not dressed like this.
“I do. I so desperately want you,” I groaned, the sight of her not making this any easier. She was wearing the skimpiest little nightie I’d ever seen—with pretty pink panties peeking out underneath. And her nipples were hard, poking up against the silky material just begging to be touched. I’d have to be dead not to want her.
And that…Peter.
“It’s too complicated.”
She nodded. “But you’ve done so much for me, and I see the way you look at me.”
“You’re beautiful.”
She blushed, brushing a piece of her long, golden hair out of her face. “Where I grew up, when a girl couldn’t pay for what she needed, this was how—”
“No.”
The word came out before I could stop myself. I crossed to the bed and sat beside her, taking her hands into mine.
“You are not a whore. I won’t…I can’t let you think about yourself that way.”
Tears filled her eyes, but she blinked them away, turning her head until she had control of herself.
“I don’t know how else to think.”
“You had a shitty childhood. You lived a life that should never be allowed in a country as great as ours. But you did. I can’t do anything about that now.” I squeezed her hands. “But I can treat you the way you should be treated and make damn sure no one else treats you any less.”
She sighed. “You’re a lot like your brother. Do you know that?”
“Yeah?”
“He said something like that to me once. Told me that just because I didn’t have the opportunities I should have had when I was younger, it didn’t mean I couldn’t make new opportunities for myself now.”
“He’s right.”
She was quiet for a long moment. When she finally looked at me, her green eyes were floating in tears.
“The way you and your family cares for one another…I want that for PJ. I just don’t see where I fit in amongst all that. I thought, if I gave myself to you—”
“You do fit in, Amber. You’re PJ’s mother. You will forever be PJ’s mother. Nothing we do or say can change that.”
“But maybe he’d be better off without me as his mother.”
Fear rushed through me, and I had no idea what its true source was. But I knew I couldn’t allow her to continue thinking that way.
I grasped her chin and lifted it up, forcing her to look at me.
“You are not your mother. You are not the kind of person who would put her own needs in front of those of her child. Just the fact that you would think something like that proves just how much you love your son.”
Tears began to roll down her cheeks. She turned, hiding them the way she’d done so many times since the moment I met her.
“Maybe we’ve gone about this the wrong way. Maybe I should have handled things differently. But, believe me, PJ needs you, Amber. My parents, Megan, and I, we want to be a part of his life. But none of us can give him all that you can.”
She nodded, sniffing loudly and wiping at her nose with the back of her hand. I brushed the hair from her face, catching some of the moisture of her tears on my fingers.
“And let me be clear about something else. What happened at your trailer, that kiss? It had nothing to do with Peter or the baby or the things my family and I have done for you. That was just about you. It was about how beautiful you are. It was about the way you make me feel when I look at you. It was about the passion and the stubbornness that make up your personality. It’s about how frustrated you make me with your constant need to prove how independent you are. It’s about the fact that when it’s time to come home after we’ve been apart for a few hours, how deeply I look forward to seeing your face.”
She looked up, surprise radiating in her eyes.
I ran my thumb over her lips.
“I hate that you do this to me. I hate that I can’t think of anyone else. I’ve never—ever—had trouble finding a woman to warm my bed. But you…you’ve stolen all that away because you’re the only one I want.”
She groaned as she leaned into me, wrapping her arms around my neck as she kissed me with a new sort of enthusiasm. I pulled her closer, sliding my fingers into her hair, twisting her head around so that I could bury myself as deeply as I physically could. She crawled into my lap, wrapping her legs around my waist. I dropped my mouth to her throat, tasting her sweet skin, tugging at the front of her nightie with a single finger, exposing the top, rounded mound of one breast. She sighed as my mouth moved over that breast, as I captured a nipple through the nightie. She ran her fingers over my head, encouraging me to move further downward, a moan slipping from her lips as I pressed my face to the center of her belly, kissing that place that was so recently swollen with new life.
I needed her. I so desperately needed her that I could hardly catch my breath. I slid my hands inside the back of her panties, taking great handfuls of her ass for a second. And then I slid one hand around to the front, making her hiss between her teeth as I slid a finger between her lips, brushing against the swollen nub of her clit.
“Is it okay?” I asked breathlessly against her ear. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It’s okay. The doctor said whenever I was ready.”
I groaned, as I nibbled at her throat. I wrapped my arms around her waist as I leaned over and tugged at the top drawer of my nightstand, snatching a wrapped condom from the box that lived there. Amber tensed when she realized what I was doing, her eyes a little wide as she watched me tug at t
he corner of the condom wrapper. She tilted her head away when I looked at her, when I tried to meet her eye.
I was such a fucking idiot! Why would I assume she was experienced just because she’d had my brother’s baby? What about her behavior had suggested that she was comfortable with this or any other sex act?
I stood with her in my arms and lay her gently on the mattress, discarding the unopened condom on my pillow. I kissed her again, letting our lips linger, our tongues do that dance they liked to do. Then I kissed her neck, loving the feel of her fingers as they ran over my hair. I slowly, ever so slowly, slipped her nightie up along her ribs, exposing her midriff, my fingers tapping a little rhythm over her bare belly. I kissed her navel, the line of her ribs, before pushing the nightie up so that I could nibble at her perfect nipples. She moaned softly, her fingers sliding over my buzzed hair.
I wanted to taste her, to show her pleasure like she’d likely never known. But she pulled me back up to her lips, and that was just as amazing. Instead, I satisfied myself with fingers sliding under the front of her panties, fingertips pressed against her clit. She pressed her thighs together for a long moment, another moan vibrating against my lips. But then she relaxed her hips, allowing me full access to the depths of her.
She was warm and moist, her hips moving in a slow rhythm as I touched as deeply as I could. Her kiss grew even more passionate, her tongue doing this thing that threatened to push me over the edge, to forget why it was that I was trying to go slow, that I was trying to drive her into thoughtless passion. I wanted to make her lose her mind, but she was well on the way to making me lose mine.
I let my finger slip out, much to her disappointment, but then pressed two fingers against her clit. She cried out, pressing her hips hard up against my hand. I dropped my mouth to her breasts again, trying to catch the tattered edges of my control. She moved her hips again and the thoughts that drove through my mind…I didn’t know how much longer I could wait.
She was the one who reached for the condom this time. She sat up just a little, reaching for the top of my shorts. I took it from her, kneeling at her side as I grasped the edges of her panties and pulled them away. She watched me, clouds in her eyes that I couldn’t quite read. I pulled her panties away slowly, waiting for her to tell me no. I waited to watch fear or uncertainty cross her face as it had done before. But it didn’t. She just kept watching me, her hand on my thigh as she waited.
When her panties were gone, I bent and kissed her belly. She pressed her hands against my head, a sigh telling me she was okay. For now. I moved down, peppering her lower belly with kisses. She spread her legs and lifted her hips. I kissed the center of her mound, felt the slight bit of pressure on my head as she tried to push me down, further. I gave her clit just the slightest lick, and she moaned.
I couldn’t wait any longer. I watched again as I tore open the condom package. She sat up, tugged her nightie from her body. And then she lay back again, her eyes sliding closed before I pulled my shorts out of the way.
There was a little tension in her body when I settled back down against her. I kissed her and she quickly responded, sliding her hand over the side of my face. I waited until the tension disappeared before sliding my hand between our bodies, guiding my cock to her waiting body. She bit her lip, tensing again.
“It’s okay,” I whispered against her jaw. “I won’t hurt you.”
She almost instantly relaxed. When she looked at me, I could see trust in her eyes. Her hips loosened, and she waited, her face so beautiful in expectation that I almost forgot about the need burning so intensely through me. But it was a need that wouldn’t allow me to forget all that easily.
I’d never been with a woman who’d given birth. I’d heard rumors that having a baby changed everything about a woman’s body. But Amber…she was tight and warm and better than anything I’d ever felt before. I entered her a little bit at a time, watching her face for clues. She closed her eyes after the first bit of pressure, chewing on her bottom lip as I pushed deeper and deeper inside of her. She relaxed her thighs after a few minutes, lifting her hips to greet me. And then a sigh of pure pleasure slipped from between her lips.
I bent to kiss her, and she eagerly returned my touch. And then I began to move, thrusting in a slow, steady rhythm that felt like the best thing on earth. She lay still until I slid my hand under her hip, tugging her up to meet my thrust, releasing her when I pulled away. She got the idea after a minute and began to dance to the same tune I was dancing to. I could see the pleasure in her expressive eyes; I could feel the tension—this time, the right sort of tension—building in her body.
“Oh…”
The sound of pleasure on her lips threatened to drive me insane. She wasn’t just dancing now, she was creating her own song, encouraging me to move along. We were both lost after a minute, both driving toward a cliff that we couldn’t avoid. She was the first to go over, crying out, biting her lip at the last second as though she was afraid to give full voice to her pleasure. I followed, tugging her body as close to mine as possible as I lost control.
We were tangled in each other, our bodies twitching through the last few shivers of pleasure, when the baby began to cry. Amber groaned, pressing her face to my shoulder.
“I don’t think I can move,” she said softly.
I chuckled against her throat.
“I’m not sure I can, either.”
We lay there a moment longer. But the baby’s cries grew insistent. I kissed her neck, her shoulder, then slowly pulled away.
“Uncle Cole to the rescue,” I said, tugging on my shorts as I made my way to the door.
The baby lay on his back in his crib, his blanket kicked off and his face red from the emotion behind his cries. I picked him up and cradled him against my chest, surprised by how quickly his cries subsided. Amber was sitting up when we came into the room, a slight blush on her cheeks.
“He okay?”
“He’s dry. I think he just wanted a midnight snack.”
I climbed onto the bed, slipping the baby into her arms. I chuckled when the baby’s mouth went straight to her bare skin, searching for a nipple.
“He is a Bradford.”
Amber’s eyes sparkled, as she looked up at me. I thought it was with tears for a second, but then I realized it was amusement.
I leaned in to kiss her, running my hand slowly down her throat. Then I cradled the baby’s hand, as the sound of his suckling and swallowing filled the room.
“Just for a little bit, PJ. Then she’s mine again.”
Chapter 16
Megan
My hands shook as I walked up to the reception desk.
“Mr. Sanchez, please.”
“Is he expecting you?”
“Nope. But tell him Megan Bradford is here. He’ll see me.”
The receptionist looked from me to Sam to Hayden. Her eyes lingered on tall, dark Hayden. Women seemed to find him somewhat irresistible, which made him an invaluable asset on occasion. This occasion, for example.
The receptionist picked up the phone and whispered to whoever picked up on the other end. When she hung up, she nodded.
“You may go back.”
Sam slipped her hand into mine as we walked the length of the corridor, my eyes reading the nameplates as we passed each office door. When we reached the one we were looking for, I paused, taking a deep breath as I faced it.
“One step at a time,” Sam said softly.
With a deep breath, I pushed the door opened and found myself in the same room as the boy I hated with a passion when I was a little middle school cheerleader.
“Megan Bradford.”
Kurt stood from behind his desk, moving around with his hand outstretched. I wanted to refuse his hand, but I was an adult now. I had to be polite. Responsible.
“How are you, Kurt?”
He studied my face for a second. “I’m good. I was sorry to hear about Peter.”
I held up the manila envelope I’d had
tucked under my arm. “Peter is actually what I’ve come to talk to you about.”
“Is that right?”
“We found some things among his effects that have raised a few questions.”
Kurt glanced nervously at Hayden and Sam, then his eyes moved to a high corner of the ceiling. I turned and looked up, noting the security camera there for the first time. When I looked at Kurt again, he was studying Sam.
“I know you, don’t I?”
“Samantha Wagner. Megan and I grew up together.”
Kurt nodded, pointing a finger at her. “You’re the one who had a crush on Peter junior year. I remember you following him around like a puppy on a leash.”
Hayden snickered, making Sam shoot a look in his direction before she focused on Kurt again.
“And I remember you were the one who made his life a living hell, teasing him about my crush.”
“Among other things.” Kurt inclined his head. “I was a cruel kid.”
That caught us both by surprise. Sam and I exchanged surprised look. And then Kurt moved close to me, grabbing my hand before I realized what he was doing, leaning close to brush my cheek with his lips.
“Meet me at the diner on the corner of Fifth and Crockett in fifteen minutes.”
Then he stepped back and said, “Thank you for coming by. It was great to see an old friend.”
We were back on the street less than five minutes later.
“That was odd,” Sam said.
“Seems like your friend wasn’t eager to talk in front of the security cameras,” Hayden unnecessarily pointed out.
“He wants to meet at a diner downtown.” I studied Hayden for a long second. “Call Dominic and stake the place out together.”
Hayden inclined his head.
“Go with him, Sam.”
She looked completely shocked, as if I’d just asked her to move in with him.
“You can’t go to this thing by yourself.”
“I won’t be alone. You guys will be right outside.”
“But Megan—”
“I think he’ll be more willing to talk if there’s not a bunch of people around.”
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