by Eva Haining
Am I naïve for hoping I’ll find real, honest love? Does it even exist for celebrities? I spend my life convincing moviegoers I’m the romantic hero—Prince Charming and Casanova rolled into one. The irony is that the lines begin to blur. It’s why so many co-star relationships burn bright and then burn out. Sure, Cece never set my world on fire, but I thought I loved her, and I believed she loved me.
How foolish.
“Dance with me,” Hazel interrupts my melancholy, her hands resting on my hips. “Those two are off having epic sex right now. The least you can do is dance with me.” I pull her close.
“I’ve offered you epic sex numerous times, but you keep shutting me down.”
“If I loved cock, you’d be my first ride, babe.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll just stand here letting you grind your minxy little ass on my junk, and then you’ll go hit up a chick and leave me hanging.”
“See… we’re on the same page. Now, dance with me, Savage!”
God, I love her. The only woman I know who has no desire to sleep with me. It’s surprisingly liberating.
The music is banging, and the drinks are endless. We dance and drink into the early hours of the morning, stumbling out into the street at three o’clock. As our car pulls up, Hazel grabs my face, planting a whopper of a kiss on my lips.
“I’ve missed you, Jasp! To Texas we go. Ride ‘em, cowboy!” Pouring ourselves into the back seat, Hazel curls up in my lap, her head resting on my shoulder. “I love you, buddy.”
“I love you, too, Haze Baze.” As I close my eyes, letting my head drop back against the seat, the world is spinning.
I’m going to regret this in the morning.
Chapter Eight
MAISIE
“I’m not doing the audition. He’s an insufferable son of a whore.” Pacing the diner, Thomas follows me back and forth, listening to me rant and rave.
“Don’t be stupid, Maisie. This could be your big break. You don’t have to like him, you just have to work with him.”
“Did you see the papers? He was sucking face with some random woman in LA It’s a matter of hygiene! I don’t want to kiss that mouth, fake or otherwise. Who knows what cooties he’s got?” My pulse is racing.
“You’re an actress. This is part of it. I don’t like it, but I want to support your dreams. Please don’t force me to talk you into kissing the biggest heartthrob in Hollywood. It’s emasculating.” Stopped in my tracks, I take in the sight of him. Young and sexy, a man any girl would love to date. Why do I care that J.J. Savage was kissing some ridiculously hot woman? I don’t. I’m just annoyed by his lack of respect for women. That’s what it is.
“I’m sorry. I know this isn’t easy. I shouldn’t be talking about this with you.” He takes my hands in his, pinning me with his gaze.
“I want you to talk to me. If you’re bothered by something, I wanna know. I’m just saying… you’re a sexy-as-hell, bonafide, southern belle. Any man would be ecstatic at the prospect of kissing you. I’m just having a tough time at the thought of it. Maybe, we don’t discuss the ins and outs of it so much. I get the concept of a screen kiss, but I don’t want to picture what that actually looks like.”
I’m a terrible girlfriend if that’s what I am. Thomas hasn’t been shy about wanting to label this, us. The best thing for our new relationship would be for me to walk away from this audition. I don’t think I can stomach working with J.J., and even if I could, I’m supposed to go up against a real actress. Why put myself through it when I know without a shadow of a doubt he’d rather pick a mustang to play across from him? Jumping through hoops for him would just be humiliating.
The cowbell rings as the door to the diner swings open, and Jack walks in with a guy I’ve never seen before. With a quick peck on the cheek, I leave Thomas to go and take their order.
“Jack, nice to see you again. What can I get for you?”
“My usual. Maisie, I’d like you to meet Ethan Bradbury, J.J.’s agent.” The slick stranger holds out his hand.
“So, you’re the elusive Maisie Bryant I’ve heard so much about.” I shake his hand, unsure of myself.
“Good or bad?”
“A bit of both. You’ve got this one and my client split down the middle,” he says, pointing to Jack.
“I’m not going to audition.”
“Now, now. You seem like a smart woman. Why would you throw away a chance at the big leagues?”
“Because J.J. hates me, and the feeling is very much mutual.” They both appear amused by my candor.
“That’s between the two of you, but if you want to be an actress, you’re going to come across lots of people you don’t particularly like. Do you like every customer you serve in here?”
“No, but I need to pay rent.”
“It’s no different… except the paycheck will have way more zeros to make it worth your while.” Why didn’t I make this correlation? My dream is still a job like any other.
“You’re right.”
“So, we’ll see you this afternoon?”
“I’ll be there with spurs on.”
I go about my shift, serving the good people of Kingsbury Falls, my mind running the audition scene over and over until I could recite it in my sleep. Every nuance. I know what I have to do.
“You don’t need to be here. You said it yourself, you don’t need the visual.” I’ve had the full treatment—makeup, hair, wardrobe—and I had to do it with my competition sitting in the chair next to me. In truth, I’m thankful Thomas decided to stay.
“I’m being supportive.” He cracks a small grin.
Nerves pulse through me with every heartbeat. What if this girl is better than me? Maybe I’m not the right person for this, but I want it, and I hate that I want it from J.J. Savage. A familiar face appears at the trailer door—the headset screamer from the first day on set.
“Juniper, Mr. Savage has requested that you audition first. Let’s go.” Of course. He wants to psyche me out.
My competition feigns sportsmanship as she heads outside.
“May the best woman win.” She’s not a good enough actress to convince me she meant a word of it, so I think my chances are pretty good right about now. If J.J. wants to put me off my game, then I’m going to stand and watch every second of his shoot with little miss fake. I won’t be intimidated by him or her.
When I step outside, I’m greeted by as many familiar as unfamiliar faces. Crew members are scurrying around like ants, but there are also some spectators who I know are rooting for me. Maddox, A.B., Jax, and his wife, Savannah, are all watching as J.J. and Juniper take their positions.
ACTION!
The crowd falls silent as the babbling waters of Mustang River provide the perfect soundtrack to this scene. My heart begins to race as I watch it play out. I’m going to have to make this believable in front of all these strangers, my friends, and Thomas. Right now, I’m feeling as yellow as mustard but without the bite.
J.J.’s good—really good. Whatever I think of him as a man, he’s an amazing actor. There’s no denying it as much as I’d like to. Even worse, Juniper isn’t terrible either. They look great together on set.
Maddox wanders over to where I’m standing, draping his arm over my shoulder, his voice barely a whisper. “You’ve got this, Mais. You’re the real deal. Show ‘em what a true Texas cowgirl’s made of.” I garner what little strength I can from one of my biggest role models in this town.
As the scene reaches its climax, I turn my gaze to Thomas, who’s looking on in abject horror as J.J. gets down and dirty with his co-star, realization dawning that he’s about to watch him do the same thing with me. A strange knot tightens in my gut, sending vibrations through every nerve ending in my body.
CUT!
Juniper sashays off set, sure to flash her pearly-white, showbiz smile in my direction. Mission accomplished. I’m intimidated. The headset screamer motions for me to take my place, and J.J. is sporting a smug expression I want to slap righ
t off his face.
“You ready, boonie?”
“I will be once you swig some Listerine. I don’t want to catch anything from your tonsil tennis with cowgirl barbie. Come to think of it, there’s no telling what I might contract from you. I guess I’ll have to take my chances.”
“Yep, time to whore yourself like the rest of us lowly actors. I’ll try not to let my fame and fortune rub off on you.”
I take a moment to compose myself, focusing on every face other than his. And that’s when I see her—the woman he was photographed with in LA, another mouth he’s been investigating with vigor. I read about her, she’s the new producer. He’s surrounding himself with women to fawn all over him.
Chancing a glance at Thomas, worry is etched on his brow no matter how hard he tries to hide it behind a reassuring smile. It’s now or never. This is my shot. J.J. Savage may be deplorable, but working with him could change my life and give me everything I’ve ever dreamed of. Steeling myself, I wait for Jack to shout Action, and when he does, I tap into the raw emotion that weaves its way through each line and cue.
J.J. can’t help giving in to his muse, his performance fueling my own. Angst, love, heartache, sadness, and lust are spiraling out of control, coursing through my veins, ripping my best work from every word and every fiber of my being. The crew disappears, lost in the background as I recite the script with expert precision. No longer am I Maisie warring with J.J. Savage, I’m Anna, pouring her heart out at the prospect of a second chance at love with Jett.
Our verbal sparring builds, the rushing water around us keeping time with my pulse, culminating in a creative crescendo. His lips crash down on mine, sending my senses into overdrive. Our hands roam each other’s bodies—exploring—clawing. Our tongues are twisting and tangling, barely able to breathe. His hands find the edges of my shirt, tearing it open, catching me off-guard.
I lose my footing, stumbling into the water, his lips still locked with mine. Wrapping his arm around my waist, he pulls me tight against his chest, steadying me.
CUT!
With his lips still pressed against mine, I’m brought back to reality by rousing applause and the caterwauling of my friends. I push back, dragging much-needed air into my lungs, scared to hold J.J.’s gaze, his eyes dark and filled with need. He truly is a gifted actor.
“You can let go of me now. Scene is over.” The labored rise and fall of his muscled chest betray his usually calm, underwhelmed exterior. His eyes search my face for some sort of understanding or mutual confusion. We’re both frozen to the spot, water lapping at our feet, staring at each other without words.
“That was phenomenal!” Jack shouts as he bounds his way over to where we stand—the scent of desire still thick in the air between us. “You two just made magic happen.”
I step out of the water, trying to muster any shred of dignity I have left. That didn’t feel very professional. Under normal circumstances, it felt like steamy foreplay between a red-blooded man and a hot-under-the-collar woman. Glancing around the crowd, the crew is excited, my friends are cheering me, but Thomas’ face is white like he’s just seen a ghost.
A crew member appears to give me a robe so I can cover my torn shirt and walk off set with a little dignity. I weave through the crowd as quickly as possible, wrapping my arms around Thomas’ neck. His familiar scent calming my pulse until it no longer thunders in my ears.
“You’re an outstanding actress, girl. That was badass!” In the safe cocoon of his arms, I close my eyes and let myself breathe it out, trying to unravel the torrent of emotions that just transpired. Filming a scene shouldn’t affect me this much. All I can think about is how his lips felt on mine. That was no screen kiss, nothing like the last time we kissed. This was a different beast—urgent, sexually charged, maddening.
Thomas presses a gentle kiss to my cheek, keeping me tight in his arms. I stay there for a few long moments, letting my breath fall in time with his, but it’s short-lived. Jack runs over, grabbing me by the shoulders.
“I could kiss you right now, Maisie!”
“Please, don’t,” Thomas interjects. “I’ve witnessed enough attempts to French my girlfriend today.” Jack pays him no mind.
“Wait here. We need to talk to Juniper. I need to have a sit down with Ethan and J.J., but then I want to talk to you.” I can’t wait around. I already feel sick to my stomach.
“I have a shift at the library. Come find me later to deliver the bad news.”
“Maisie…” I cut him off before he can give me empty platitudes. I’m well aware J.J. will put his foot down after that performance and insist Juniper gets the part.
Returning to the trailer, I remove the perfectly applied makeup, throw my hair in a top knot, and change back into my worn-out jeans and a tee. I’m Cinderella, and it’s time to turn back into a pumpkin.
Thomas follows quickly on my heels as I take off at a run. There’s a storm raging inside me that I can’t explain or understand. Whatever just happened out there was transcendent. I was so in touch with my character that we merged, becoming one very real person in that moment. The prospect of losing out on my dream after being close enough to taste it in all its splendor makes me claustrophobic. The trailer, the set, this town, every inch of it is closing in around me.
“Maisie, hold up!” Stopping dead in my tracks, I’m aware of the tears streaming down my face. “What’s wrong?”
“I want it so bad, and he’s not going to let me have it. He’ll choose her out of spite.” He’s puzzled.
“You blew her out of the water! You’re going to get the part, I’m certain of it. You almost had me believing you’re in love with the guy.” Oh my God. He just witnessed I’m not even sure what to call it.
“I’m so sorry, Thomas.”
“Don’t apologize. I know it was just acting. My point is that you were amazing. You were Anna. That Juniper girl didn’t hold a candle to you. Everyone on set knew it… our friends, the crew. You should’ve heard the whispers spreading like wildfire. They were all mesmerized by how incredible your performance was.” I pull him into my arms, planting a soft kiss on his lips, washing away the scent, taste, and the feel of J.J. Savage.
“You’re too good to me.”
“What can I say, I’m a sucker for you, Maisie Bryant.” A pang of guilt tugs at my heartstrings. Is it wrong to stay in this, hoping my feelings catch up to where he’s at?
“I have to get to work. I’ll call you later. Thanks for being here today. It means a lot to me.”
“I wouldn’t have been anywhere else. Just take a breath. Believe in yourself, trust your talent, and have faith in the process. You got this.” Holding him in my arms, I want so badly for my insides to take flight. He’s the perfect guy—kind, considerate, steadfast, and sexy. He has it all, and yet my heart isn’t getting the signal from my brain.
“I’ll call you later.” I leave him standing on the gravel of Mustang Ranch, putting as much distance between myself and the confusion gnawing at my chest.
The library is the same as any other day, providing the predictable comfort of the Dewey Decimal System. Everything has its place, and the silent hum of like-minded readers is the melody that soothes my soul. From a young age, I loved coming here—new worlds to be explored and characters to learn with zero restrictions. I could get lost in the pages of a book for hours. The pay is laughable, but I’ve always enjoyed working here.
It’s my happy place.
Until he walks in.
There’s a surrealness to this moment. A larger-than-life movie star whose face adorns more than one—now a major motion picture—book cover. The silence I relish now deafens me as my pulse begins to race. He’s here to gloat.
“Can we talk?”
“Couldn’t you have sent one of your minions to deliver the bad news?” The crack in my voice betrays me.
“I shouldn’t need to tell you this, but can you keep your voice down? We’re in a library, and I don’t need you drawing attention.
” He can’t hide his disdain, but as the scent of his cologne invades my space, my eyes are drawn to his lips. Fake or not, those lips were ravaging mine a few short hours ago.
Grabbing his arm, I pull him through the stacks and into the back office.
“You really had to come down here in person to tell me you’re choosing Juniper? I knew I didn’t have a shot. I shouldn’t have bothered. You’ve made your feelings very clear… I annoy you. You don’t like opinionated women or women who don’t go weak at the knees for you.”
“Will you just quit the sass for two fucking seconds? Why do you have to make everything so goddamn difficult?”
“I…” He presses a finger to my lips.
“Be quiet, this is hard enough.” My breathing becomes shallow. My lips are on fire where his skin touches mine. “You’re right. You irk the shit out of me.”
“Well, you…”
“Stop!” He stares me down, frustration evident in the planes of his face. “This is my movie, my salvation. So, it falls to me. I might be stubborn, but I’m not a complete idiot. You were the better choice. The entire crew agrees. The part is yours if you want it.” He drops his hand, giving me the chance to answer.
“What?”
“Really? You’re going to make me say it again?” Rolling his eyes, he indulges me. “You were the better choice. The part is yours. We start the table read tomorrow. You in?”
Whooshing fills my ears like the rushing water of the river. My heart is pounding so hard it hurts. I’m going to be starring in a big-budget movie. Me, Maisie Bryant, with J.J. Savage. Before I know what I’m doing, I wrap my arms so tight around his neck, he chokes.
“Oh my God! Yes! I won’t let you down.” When I pull back, his breath catches as our eyes meet, that on-set spark slamming into my chest. I’m not sure how to turn it off.
“You better not, small-town.” Watching how he licks his lips as his gaze flits from my eyes to my mouth, I gulp. The warmth of his breath on my skin is so close I can almost taste him again. Dropping my arms, I release him, taking a few much-needed steps back to compose myself. It’s just a silly reaction to a fake connection. If I’m going to do this, I need to keep reminding myself.