Owned: An Alpha Anthology

by Jani Kay

  "So good, Reed, it feels so fucking good. Please let me suck you. I want to taste you." I shake my head. "Just a few more seconds and you can, but let’s get you on your way first."

  Jet pushes all the way inside her as I speak. I watch as his hands hold onto her hips and he begins to pump slowly into her. His eyes are on me as he bites down on his bottom lip.

  "She feels good, Reed, good and tight but I wish she was you. I wish this was your arse I was fucking." He doesn’t take his eyes from mine. I don’t get scared when he says these things anymore. I know he means every one of them, but they don’t terrify me like they used to. He’s my mate, I love him like a mate but that’s all. I like kinky, weird, fucked up sex, but I don’t like to fuck men. I don’t fancy men. I’ve watched two men fucking. Actually I’ve watched three and four men fucking and I’ve totally come in my hand over it, and all over a bird’s face while I’ve watched a few times too, but it’s because of the eroticism of the moment. It’s watching them get off that’s made me get off, it has nothing to do with the fact that they’re men.

  I push my cock back into Lara’s mouth and push my hips up as the momentum of Jet pushing into her arse moves her forward. She pushes on the underside of my cock with the flat of her tongue, forcing it up to the roof of her mouth. She swallows and gags slightly and the sensation is almost too much. I pull on her hair and Jet takes that as a cue to slap her arse again, in turn making her moan around my cock.

  "Push the toy back in, full speed, push it deep but be gentle," I tell him. Lara groans around my cock with anticipation and I watch her face as Jet follows my instructions. My eyes move from hers to Jets, both of them are staring right at me. Lara starts to moan continuously now and the vibration feels fucking spot on. I get that all too familiar tingle at the base of my spine as my balls begin to tighten. I wrap her hair tightly in my hand and hold her head still as I lift my hips and fuck her face.

  "Yes, yes Reed. Harder, fuck her harder. Oh God, I can feel that vibrator against my cock. Fuck, I’m gonna come. Come Reed, let me see your face. Fuck Reed. Fuck, I want you. I love you Reed, I fucking love you."

  I shut my eyes to try and shut out Jet’s voice. I know he’s a sensitive soul, but I don’t do all that love shit. I feel it, I write it in my songs but that’s as far as it goes for me, since her. I don’t say those words out loud to anyone except my family.

  My arse cheeks clench almost as tight as my balls and my dick throbs painfully as I come inside Lara’s mouth. I squeeze my eyes shut tight, but it doesn’t help. It doesn’t keep her away. Yeah, when it’s good I see stars. I get that white flash of light when I blow my load, but in amongst it all, every time, there’s always a pair of blue eyes, long blonde hair and the face of an angel. My angel, Amoeba. It’s been fourteen years and a whole world of hurt and fucking heartache since I last saw her. Yet she’s still there, still here, in my head, my belly and my heart and I so wish to fuck that wasn’t the case.

  REED BY LESLEY JONES

  2

  We walk toward the hotel lobby like we’re kings of the fucking world. One because we can and two, because, well basically, we are. Our album is at number one and has just gone platinum. We have four songs sitting inside the music download chart and our eighteen-month world tour has been a complete and total sell out. On top of that, I’ve just come in the mouth of a bird we pulled out of the audience at our show while riding in the limo back to our hotel. Who does that I ask ya? Me, Conner fucking Reed, that’s who does that. Fuck her. Fuck her and her blue eyes and her blonde hair and those fuckeyed freckles that are all over her nose after just ten minutes in the sun. Fuck her and her boring little life she’s probably leading. Married to someone that Mummy and Daddy and that prick of a brother of hers actually approve of. Someone who didn’t grow up on a council estate, whose dad wasn’t an alchi and whose mum wasn’t a junky, murdered by her dealer. I bet whoever he is, he’s never got a blow job in the back of a limo.

  What if he has? What if he’s gotten a blowjob from her? What if she loves it? What if she loves him? What if she’s had his babies?

  Fuck!

  Fuck!

  Fuck!

  I need to shut my brain down. This is why I try and stay away from coke, it makes me think. It makes me think far too much. I need a drink. I need to get up to our room, watch some randoms fuck when I tell them to, and I need to get drunk. I need to drink until my brain shuts the fuck up and I can go to sleep and not dream of... not dream of any of them. Not her, not my mum and not Miles.

  There are a few photographers hanging about outside and I take a couple of deep breaths and get my racing thoughts under control as we stop and pose, letting them earn their money. I need to shut her down. I need to shut down all thoughts of her and fuck them off out of my brain. It’s been fourteen years... fourteen years, and I seriously need to get a fucking grip. I hate that she can still do this. I’m Conner Reed. I’m living the dream and yet a single thought, a distant memory of a little blue eyed, blonde haired girl from Surrey can bring me to my knees. Well. Fuck. Her. Tonight, I’m not gonna let that happen. I’m gonna focus on the here and now and just how great my fucking life is.

  I’m buzzing from the coke, the last show of the tour and the fact that I’ve just blown my load down the back of some bird’s throat in the back of the limo. I’ve had a good night so far, so let’s pay it forward and give the paps the picture they need to pay their rent with this week. They’re wankers most of them, but at the end of the day, it’s their job and I’m happy to help out anyone that’s just trying to make a living.

  The lovely Lara’s still with us and for some reason, which probably seems totally logical in Jet’s weird but beautiful mind, he’s now carrying her monkey style, toward the lifts that’ll take us up to our penthouse, and the guests we invited to join us earlier. And then I see her, and my buzz and my good mood vanish in an instant.

  Amanda Vale. Women like her are the reason that I don’t do return rides. I made the mistake of fucking her twice. She now assumes there’s something between us, and that I just need to come to my senses and realise it. Yeah, right. What she needs to do is take the hint that I’m not interested, then fuck off and leave me alone. I don’t do relationships. The problem is, she’s a personal assistant to our manager, Lawson and her dad’s a major shareholder in our record label, which all means she’s around – a lot.

  She’s older than me, about forty I reckon. She’s beautiful don’t get me wrong. She’s stunning and keeps herself in good shape, but none of that matters. She’s not her. None of them are her and that’s why none of them matter.

  "Oh dear, stalker alert at two o’clock," Jet says quietly from beside me as Lara sucks on his neck, her arms and legs wrapped around him as he continues to carry her like a baby monkey clinging to his chest.

  "Yeah, I see. Don’t make eye contact." We both keep looking straight ahead, aiming for the lift that’s only destination is to our room.

  "Reed," she calls out.

  "Fuck," Jet and I both whisper together. We both turn at the same time and face Amanda.

  "Well, looky here, it’s Miss Mandy. You coming up to play with us sweetie?" Jet asks her. She knows what he’s asking. She knows the kind of games we like to play, especially after a show. She’s seen what goes on and she knows how we operate. She’s even joined us once. I watch as her eyes move from me to Jet, to Lara and back to Jet again.

  "I actually wondered if you fancied going for something to eat, Reed?" Her eyes move back to mine. Fuck, I don’t want to be an arsehole, but there’s no way I’m going anywhere with her.

  "Sorry Amanda, I’ve already got plans," I tell her.

  "But you’re more than welcome to join us if you want," Jet adds.

  "Will I have your undivided attention if I do, Reed?"

  I shake my head before she’s even finished speaking. "You know that’s not how we operate, Amanda. Now if you don’t mind, it’s been a long tour, and now it’s over I’m gonna go
and have some fun before I fly home tomorrow." We turn and head back toward the lift and leave her standing there. I feel bad, but I shouldn’t. We had a quick fuck in an office at the studios one drunken night and then she joined Jet and me for a foursome with some other girl, whose name I don’t remember. Although technically, I just watched and directed the three of them in action, until the very last minute when I came in the mouth of the unnamed girl, pissing Amanda off big time. That was about three months ago, and despite me telling her from the start there was nothing more than sex between us, since then, she’s constantly tried ways to be alone with me. She’s invited me out for drinks, lunch, coffee, and dinner. She’s tried them all. I’ve refused each and every offer and yet here she is, still trying, still not giving up. She’s persistent, I’ll give her that.

  * * *

  I step out of the shower and grab a towel off the rack and wrap it around my hips. I grab another and rub my hair dry with it while wandering into the bedroom. I sit on the bed and stare down at the carpet, mentally preparing myself for tonight’s events. We invited two couples and two girls back to join us tonight, plus, we have now added Lara to the mix.

  The buzz from the coke I had earlier is wearing off and if the truth be told, I’d quite happily go straight to bed right now, but if I do that, I’ll start to think, and the first and probably the last thing I’ll think about is her. I get the usual stab of pain in my gut and chest, the instant I allow her image to enter my head.

  It’s been almost fifteen years since I saw or spoke to her in person. Fifteen long years since the night my life changed forever. Her not bothering to show up that night, changed the course I thought my life was set on. Her not showing up, resulted in my brother’s death and me going to prison. Ultimately, all of those things had led me to Jet and the band, but I’d give it all up in a heartbeat if it meant I got my brother back, if the accident hadn’t happened, if she, had just turned up. I look up toward the door as it rattles and Jet calls my name.

  "Reed, dude, hope you’re not in there getting all depressed. Get out here and have some fun. Stop thinking and come join us."

  I take a deep breath in and let it out slowly. It hurts, I don’t know why but by keeping my breaths short and shallow, it helps keeps the pain away. When I breathe deep, it’s like I let go of the tightness in my chest a little, which in turn, lets the ache and the pain out, or is it in? All these years later and it still hurts just as much. I seriously need to get a grip.

  "Reed, you hearing me?"

  "Yeah man, I’ll be out in a minute. Go get them warmed up and wet. Put on a porno or something. Yeah, put on some gay porn. I wanna see how the bloke with the muscles reacts. Let’s see how far we can push him tonight."

  "You’re an evil, twisted genius, Conner Reed. I fucking love you. Don’t be long."

  Twisted, now ain’t that the truth. I’d moved on from my days of just liking to take charge in the bedroom. I’d joined the band just as they’d made it big. I hadn’t had to do the hard yards with the rest of them. Two months after Jet found me busking at Tottenham Court Road Tube Station and asked me to audition, we’d signed a recording deal. I’d gone from living on the streets and in homeless shelters, busking for a living, to staying at the best hotels around the world and having a lump sum of two hundred and fifty grand US paid into my newly opened bank account, with a weekly expense allowance of another three thousand added to that. I’d seriously died and gone to rock star heaven. That was peanuts compared to what I’m earning now. I pay more than that in tax a year.

  What I discovered, along with all of that is, that women will do anything, and I do mean anything, just to be a small part of my world. But the biggest surprise came, when I found out it wasn’t just women, it was blokes too. And being the twisted little freak that I am, I pushed and pushed, just to see how far people would go to get what they wanted, and I soon discovered it was pretty much all the fucking way.

  What resulted from that is what I’m about to do now. Mindless, dirty, filthy sex. It’s the only kind of sex, the only kind of intimacy I can handle. I hate soft gentle touches. I hate whispered words of love or terms of endearment. I want nothing personal about the whole experience. My attitude toward sex is fucked and as much as I know it’s wrong, I like nothing better than taking a seemingly happy couple and destroying everything they thought they knew about themselves and each other, sexually. And being Conner Reed, lead guitarist and sometimes singer for Shift, I always get people to do exactly what I want them to. Yeah, I abuse my status in life, so fucking what. You want a job as a roadie? Sure, tell your girlfriend to suck me off while you watch, and the job’s all yours. You girls want backstage passes and access to the after party? No problem, strap this on and fuck your mate from behind while she sucks me off and I’ll get you backstage at any concert you want. My life is fucked, why shouldn’t theirs be too.

  REED BY LESLEY JONES

  3

  I step out of the tranquillity and solitude of my bedroom and into what looks like a scene from a brothel or sex club. On the big plasma screen on the wall, one bloke’s being spit roasted between two others. The sound is down and Alex Gaudino’s ‘Destination Calabria’ is pulsing through the suite’s sound system.

  The girls from the two couples we have invited are straddling their boyfriend’s laps, doing nothing more than kissing them. Oh dear, that just won’t do. The two girls we invited at the sound check earlier are obviously a little more adventurous. One is sitting, naked from the waist down on Jet’s face, the other is sucking his cock. Lara, the girl from the limo, is cutting a line of coke on the granite bench top in the kitchen area. The girl seriously has a problem!

  The room is dimly lit by the giant fish tank built into the wall. The whole area is bathed in a beautiful blue light, only altering when the threesome on the telly changes position.

  I sit in the wing-backed chair facing the huge sofa everyone is occupying and wait for them to realise I’m there.

  The girl sitting on Jet’s face notices me first. She climbs off of him and walks toward me wearing nothing but a bra, one of her tits is hanging out and her makeup is smudged under her eyes. She looks anything but attractive, and I shake my head as she reaches toward my cock.

  I’m wearing jeans and a T-shirt. I still haven’t decided yet if I’m going to take part, but if they all look as rough as the woman standing in front of me right now, I’m likely to go with a no. I’ll just take care of myself as I watch all of them carry out my orders. I get off on the power trip. Watching other people fuck, suck and lick because I’ve told them to, turns me on, or maybe, I’m just a perv who likes to watch other people having sex. Who knows? I’ve never discussed it with a professional and I never intend to. It works for me and that’s all I really care about.

  Jet sits up and pulls the girl sucking his cock, out of his lap by her hair. She wipes the back of her hand across her mouth. The two couples are now all sitting side by side on the sofa, the girls on the inside, wedged between the blokes. One couple are grunger types, both have tats and piercings. The other two look like a pair of fitness freaks, all toned and tanned. She’s blonde with massive fake tits that are far too big for her skinny frame. He looks like Johnny Bravo from the cartoon show.

  "What’re your name’s girls?" I watch Johnny straighten up. He doesn’t like me talking to his girl. Hmmm, interesting.

  "Shayla," the little punk princess says first. I look across to Jet who’s sitting cross legged on the floor smoking a joint. She’s just his type, but then again, so is her boyfriend. Jet winks at me, he knows what I’m thinking and he gives a little nod.

  "Lacy," the Barbie Doll adds while twirling her hair around her finger. She’s about twenty-five, not five. Does she seriously think that acting all cute and coy is gonna do things for me?

  "You ever kissed a girl, Lacy?" She stops twirling her hair. Johnny shifts next to her and clears his throat. I think he likes that idea.

  She nods her head. "Yeah, a few, back
in college." She tilts her chin defiantly at me.

  "I didn’t know that," Johnny says from beside her.

  "You’ve never asked," Barbie replies.

  "Did you like it?"

  Oh, he really likes this idea, I’m gonna have some fun with these two.

  She nods her head and smiles first at him, then at me. "It was different, much softer than with a man."

  "Did you just kiss, or did you do more?" Johnny asks her. She looks around the room at everyone. The two girls Jet was enjoying earlier are sitting either side of him now and Lara’s sitting next to them.

  "Well, a couple of times we sort of made out."

  "What’s made out mean, Lacy? I’m English, it’s not a term we use, so you’ll have to explain."

  She squirms a little bit, tilts her head to the side and says, "We fucked, okay? It happened more than once and it’s happened a few times since we left college. And yes, Kale, before you ask, I liked it. I fucking loved it. It’s different, girls know, they just know what to do, where to touch, how to touch another girl."

  "Sheesh," Johnny says and runs his hands through his hair.

  I turn my gaze to Shayla, who has a big grin on her face and before I can ask her, she says, "Fuck yeah. I’m bi, we love a three way, don’t we baby?" The boyfriend smiles, nods and takes a long draw on the joint Jet’s just passed him.

  "I love a three way and I love to watch Shay with another girl." Johnny’s now staring at Shayla wide-eyed and chewing his gum really fast. Jet turns, looks up at me and winks again. He knows my plan.

  "Kiss Lacy, Shayla." I order. Johnny’s jaw is now on fast forward and I’m actually worried it’s going to dislocate as he chews his gum at warp speed. Lacy pushes both hands through her hair and turns to Shayla.

  They look at each other for a few seconds before Johnny says, "Do it baby, kiss her." Lacy straddles Shayla’s lap and goes straight in for a kiss. It starts soft and gentle, then they start pulling at each other’s hair and rocking their hips into each other.