by Andrea Hurtt
“No—” Hope said automatically, then remembered all the sex she’d had with Nick. “I…umm…I guess it could be possible, but I’m on birth control.”
“Well, there is always that one percent chance. We’ll take a little blood to run to labs, just to make sure,” the nurse said, patting her uninjured hand.
Her heart pounded.
She’d thought about telling Nick to get a condom but hadn’t acted on it. Why not?
She was on birth control.
Because we were hot and bothered and not thinking straight.
How many times?
Too many…
Not enough…
She took a deep breath to calm herself.
It wasn’t likely she could be pregnant. Her periods were never regular, so the likelihood of getting knocked up was slim, even if she hadn’t been on the pill.
The nurse stepped out to gather her supplies.
She returned with news.
“But I can’t be! I was on the pill!”
“Like I said, there is always that one percent. Were you on any antibiotics prior to having intercourse?”
Hope found herself blushing at the words until they sunk in.
“Oh shit! Yes. I had a sinus infection right before I took off to Los Angeles. My doctor put me on an antibiotic for two weeks. But I thought they’d proven most antibiotics didn’t affect hormone treatments?”
“That is correct. But there are still a few. Do you remember what you were on?”
Hope scrunched her brows together, struggling to recall. “I don’t remember.But it was something for people with an allergy to penicillin.”
“That’s most likely what did you in. But, congratulations.”
It was about an hour before Hope returned to the lobby, and Krissy. They’d put her wrist in a brace, and gave her a ream full of paperwork.
“Well?” Her friend jumped out of her seat.
“It’s fractured. I have a prescription for pain pills I gotta fill. And I need to ice it for fifteen-minute intervals.”
“So you’ll live?”
“I will. But I won’t be getting a new horse anytime soon.”
Krissy smiled. “I’m sure not.”
They filled Hope’s prescription and her friend took her home. “Do you want company?”
She sighed. “I appreciate it, but no. I’m gonna watch a movie and crash early. But thank you for everything you’ve done for me today. It means a lot.”
Hope went to the kitchen and popped a bag of popcorn, then shut all the blinds. It was almost dark in the living room, even though it was midafternoon.
She put in a favorite movie, Ever After, and tried to get comfortable. She did her best to stay awake, but it was no use, and soon fell asleep on the couch.
October came and went without issue. Hope had little to no morning sickness, but had yet to tell anyone her situation.
She was afraid to tell her family; they were strong church members, and she would bring them shame. Even if she was a grown adult, fully capable of caring for a child when unwed.
Hope didn’t tell her best friend. She feared Grace would tell Blaze, who would tell Nick. She wasn’t ready for that.
Telling her bestie would come sooner, rather than later. Grace kept pushing for Hope to come for Thanksgiving. She wasn’t taking no for an answer.
As the holiday loomed closer, she longed to get out of going, and assumed she might get her wish.
Her beautiful friend hadn’t said a word about it in days. Hope was relieved. Until she opened her emails the weekend before Thanksgiving.
Travel arrangements stared her in the face.
Seriously?
She grabbed her cell. “What the hell, Elvis. I told you I couldn’t make it!”
“And I don't believe your bullshit. You are flying down after work on Wednesday and flying back Sunday night. You won’t miss any work. I know your neighbor will take care of the pets. She never minds, even if you do. So pack a bag and be ready for the car to pick you up at 6:30 p.m. Don’t argue…” Her best friend went on and on.
One would never know the woman had been through hell at the hands of a so-called-friend.
Hope missed her terribly. She wanted to share her news. However, it wasn’t something she wanted to do over the phone.
She succumbed, agreeing to come for the weekend.
Grace squealed with excitement.
Just days later, Hope stepped off the small plane at the Burbank airport. She was happy to be in the smaller airport—instead of LAX—and, closer to Grace’s new home.
She’d packed light, only bringing a small carry-on, so it didn’t take her long to get going. Hope put her hand on her belly; the tiny bean was still small, but she was just starting to show. She saw the bump, but would her best friend?
If not, she needed to figure out how to tell Grace.
Her bestie was waiting, just outside security.
Blaze was right beside her, holding her free hand.
The sling was gone, but Grace still had a cast on her wrist. The walking boot was gone, and a lace-up brace was in its place.
Hope had a feeling it would be awhile before Grace was back in a pair of heels.
She tugged at her oversized jacket, trying to keep her secret a little longer. She stepped into her friend’s open embrace, hugging her like she never wanted to let go.
She’d missed her friend, but didn’t realize how much until that moment.
When Grace let her go, she took a half step back, only to have Blaze grab her hand and give a hard squeeze.
“I’m glad you’re here. My Gracie wouldn’t shut up about getting you here. I think she really needed you. Thank you.”
Hope didn’t know what to say. It’d been a while since she had felt needed. Blaze rescued her, in a way.
“Do you have a checked bag?” he asked.
She shook her head.
“Awesome. Let’s get outta here.” Grace beamed.
It might be late November, but in Burbank, the temperature was still nice and warm. As soon as they were in the car, Blaze flipped the switch to fold back the top of his convertible mustang.
Hope sighed as the not-so-winter wind whipped around her. They were at Grace’s place in no time. Her friend lived very close to the airport.
They pulled into the parking lot of the townhouse, but instead of parking the car, Blaze pulled up to the curb.
“Sorry I gotta drop and run, but I’ve got a few things to take care of before we have dinner tonight.” He kissed Grace. “See you in a little while.”
They climbed out and headed inside.
Her bestie proudly gave Hope the tour of her little place.
A lot had changed in terms of Grace’s things. She had a new couch, kitchen table, and bedroom set. But Frisco, her pink and orange stuffed tiger, still sat on the bed.
After what had happened, Hope understood the need to change up her furniture. However, Grace’s antique dining room table had been a prized possession. Whatever had happened involving the table must’ve been terrible.
A shiver went up Hope’s spine, and she banished the dark thoughts.
Grace led her to the couch and sat, patting the spot beside her. “Now that Blaze left, do you want to tell me what’s going on?”
Her friend’s voice was motherly, and she couldn’t help herself.
Hope took a deep breath. It seemed so much harder to say out loud. “I’m pregnant."
Grace’s eyes went so wide the whites showed. She opened her mouth, but no sound came out. Until she tried again. “What? How…long have you…known?” her friend sputtered.
She held up her wrist, the wrapped brace now took place of the fiberglass cast she’d worn until a week ago. “They did a blood test to check before they did X-rays.”
“You’ve known for weeks? Did you tell Nick?”
“No.”
“No?” Grace’s voice went up. An almost-yell. “How could you not tell him?”
&
nbsp; Hope sighed, praying her friend would back off. She’d never done well with confrontation. “I wanted him to be able to walk away without feeling guilty.”
Grace raised an eyebrow at her.
“I just didn’t want him to feel obligated to me, or worse—blame me for doing it on purpose.”
“Why would he think you did it on purpose?”
“I don’t know. I was on birth control but we never talked about safe sex, even though I thought about it. I should have pushed.”
“Did he ever provide a condom?”
Hope shook her head.
“Then he’s as much to blame as you.”
“I know, but there are thousands of women out there that would have his baby just to get his money, or even be connected in some small way for the rest of their lives. I don’t want him to think I’m that kind of person.”
“Nick loves you. He wouldn’t think like that”
Hope snorted. “Just because he said it on national TV doesn’t make it real. It was a ploy. Publicity.”
“No, it wasn’t. I saw his confession. Even though I was in the throws of my own excitement with Blaze’s declaration, I know what I saw on Nick’s face.
“An act,” Hope pushed.
Grace threw her hands up. “Agree to disagree then.”
Hope nodded.
“So what are you going to do?” Grace asked.
Hope shrugged. “Go home after the holiday and start getting things ready for the baby’s arrival.”
“Are you ever going to tell him?” she asked. “Nick needs to know. It’s not right to keep a child from its father.”
“If he reaches out, I will. But you have to swear not to tell Blaze.”
“What? Why?” Grace sounded offended.
“Because, he’ll tell Nick and I don’t want him coming back because of an unplanned pregnancy. If he does return, I want it to be for me.”
“Wait, what? Come back? I thought you two were keeping in touch. Nick gave no impression you two were no longer together.”
“He hasn’t been dating a new girl?”
“No, why would you say that?” Grace cocked her head to one side.
Hope sighed again. It was one thing to think the words, but another to say them out loud. “He never replied when I told him I landed that day. Our goodbye kiss at the Denver airport felt so final.”
“Final?” her friend frowned.
“It felt like he was telling me goodbye forever.”
“You didn’t try texting him again? Remind him you’re still around?”
“Gracie, I shouldn’t have to remind him! If he wanted me in his life, he would’ve responded. A text, a phone call. Something. I got nothing. But a farewell kiss. A real goodbye”
“And what if he never reaches out?”
“I have good health insurance, and I can take maternity leave. I’ll convert my office into the baby’s room and put my desk in the library.”
“Wow, you’ve got this all figured out.”
Hope narrowed her eyes. Grace’s tone was odd; she couldn’t figure out if her friend had been sarcastic or serious. Maybe a bit of both?
She got it, her best friend was now stuck between a rock and a hard place. They had been friends for more than half their lives. But she couldn’t force Grace to pick sides. Only she could make the decision whether to tell Nick. She was so torn.
Would he reject them both?
Could she handle that?
She took a breath so she wouldn’t sound irritated. “I’ve had little else to think about the past few weeks.”
Grace sighed. “I don’t want to fight with you, but I think you are wrong. My best friend is pregnant by my man’s best friend, who I care for, so yeah. I’m torn! I want you to do the right thing here, whatever you think that is. And no matter what happens with Nick, I’m always here for you. If you need to, you can always move here. I could convert my office to a nursery. Anything you need, I’m here.”
Hope laughed. She could just see herself trying to move, with three dogs and an enormous belly. “I appreciate it, but it’s not necessary. Let’s just see what happens.”
Chapter 22
The next morning, Hope busied herself preparing her grandma’s apple salad recipe. She tugged at her shirt, trying to lower the hem a little more.
She was only three months along, but because of her short stature; she was definitely showing. She’d found some cute garments that didn’t look like maternity clothes, but there was no way she was going to hide this from Blaze. Her bestie’s man was too shrewd.
He helped set everything in the dining room and took the bowl of apple salad from her hands.
Hope gritted her teeth and waited for him to return into the kitchen.
Please don’t notice.
Please don’t see.
Grace was at the sink, washing the potatoes she was about to put in a pot of boiling water.
Hope had strategically placed herself between the island and Blaze to hide her belly.
“So, Nick’s having Thanksgiving at his mom’s house. I guess they’re trying to fix their family. After everything that happened, they needed time together. It’s only a few days, because we have to get back on the road. I was hoping he’d be here with you,” Blaze said.
The news eased her mind. Nick wouldn’t just show up, even though her heart ached to see him again.
Maybe Blaze would back off, if she revealed the truth about her and Nick.
She blew out a breath.
“He wouldn’t be here with me. Even if he didn’t need to be with his family.”
“Why’d you say that?” There was actual concern in his voice.
“He doesn’t want me.” Hope looked down. Saying the words out loud made them ricochet off her heart, and shoot down her spine, followed by a stinging tingle in her limbs.
She wanted him to want her.
Now…she had his baby inside her, and she didn’t want him back for that.
She blinked away tears. She couldn’t cry now.
Stupid pregnancy hormones.
Blaze rounded the island and brought her in for a hug. “I don’t know why you’d say…” He pulled her tighter, and stared her down. “What the hell is that?” He practically pushed her away, yet held on to her shoulders, looking down at her belly.
“It’s a bean,” she whispered.
Blaze looked over at Grace. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Hurt made his voice thicker.
“I just found out last night,” Grace whispered.
“So... Does Nick know?” Blaze’s brows were drawn tight, and his mouth was a hard line.
“No.”
“I hate to ask this, but…is it his?”
Fire flashed in Grace’s eyes as her head snapped around to face her lover.
Hope’s heart lifted a little that her bestie would defend her so vehemently.
“Of course it's his!” Her friend yelled at him.
Hope didn’t care she hadn’t had to answer for herself.
“I’m sorry, babe,” he said before making eye contact with Hope again. “But why haven’t you told him?”
Again, her friend spoke before she could. “Because he never came back,” Grace whispered, wiping her wet hands on the hand towel that rested on her shoulder.
“What d’you mean he never came back? How could he? We had rehearsals, then hit the road. There wasn’t time for him to go visit.”
Hope let out the breath. “He didn’t come back to me in any shape. No texts. No calls. Nothing. I sent him a text when I got home from Denver. He never replied. When he kissed me goodbye at my gate, it was…” She couldn’t say it again. Her eyes clouded with tears. Stupid hormones.
Grace joined them at the island, but looked at her man instead of her. “I think she’s given up on ever seeing him again.”
Blaze pulled his phone from his back pocket, but Grace covered the device with her hand.
“You can’t tell him,” Now her friend was angry.
“Blaze, it’s not our place—”
“Yes it is!” Blaze’s voice reverberated off the kitchen walls.
Hope stepped closer. “He made his choice. He doesn’t want me. I won’t burden him with something he doesn’t want.”
“You don’t know that. You can’t begin to comprehend what our lifestyle is like. It may not have been his choice to not see you. When we’re on tour, we’re at the mercy of the promoters and upper management. We sleep and perform. And if we’re lucky, we get to eat once in a while. You have to at least give him a chance to know his own kid. It’s his right. And I don’t even mean legally.”
Hope shook her head. Her eyes burned. It hurt too much.
She’d lived one day at a time, and tried not to borrow trouble.
She hadn’t noticed she was crying until Blaze reached out and gently took one tear from her cheek before his arms encircled her. Her eyes stung with more tears. “Please, don’t tell him,” she whispered.
Blaze groaned, as if he was really torn.
Guilt rose up and bit, but she couldn’t apologize.
He finally capitulated. “I don’t like it, but I won’t.” He pulled her into a protective hug. “But I want you to know, if you need anything, I’ll be here for you.”
Relief flooded her, and make her knees wobble. Hope nodded.
Blaze pulled away gently, but she couldn’t meet his gaze.
He gently lifted her chin with two fingers, so she’d have to. “I just have one request.”
Hope finally looked into his eyes, but she frowned.
“Can this kid call me Uncle Blaze?”
Hope laughed through her tears.
Nick was just going through the motions.
He loved touring. It’d been his world for most of his life. This time, he was emotionless.
He knew the choreography; never forgot a lyric.
His heart wasn’t in it.
He sang to the fans, played the part, gave them the show they wanted. However, Nick couldn’t tell the difference between day or night.
He didn’t know where he belonged.
He felt so lost.
Help me.
The right decision was to reach out to her, get answers. He was Nick fucking Ford, one of the hottest men in the music industry.