I stand over the stove cooking scrambled eggs and ham while lost in thought when I feel two arms snake around me from behind. The smell of soap and cologne mixes in the air. A clean-shaven cheek rests against mine before kissing my cheek. "Good morning," he says in a deep voice. His hands rest on my rounded stomach and his breath tickles the skin against my neck as he trails kisses downward giving me chill bumps. "There is something strangely erotic about you barefoot and pregnant standing at the stove."
I turn off the heated eye of the stove and turn in his arms. He is standing fully dressed in black suit pants and an aqua blue long sleeve shirt with a tie that is a pattern of black and aqua. I grab the knot of his tie and tighten it around his neck. "It's hard to get used to you wearing suits. I'm surprised your dad hasn't made you shorten your hair even more."
Preston has always had hair longer than his dad's taste allows. It's still short in the back and around the sides, but he keeps the top longer. It falls long enough to bypass his eyebrows if he doesn’t brush it back, and that’s only been recently. He did have the sides and back long enough to flip out until he got tired of listening to his dad complain that it wasn’t professional for a man in his position. It's another thing that attributes to his model type features. "He isn't going to bite the hand the helps feed him," he says with a cocky but teasing tone followed by a smirk. "Business plans have tripled since I started and projects are scheduled on the books to keep us busy for at least the next five years."
"You know what happens when you get too cocky. You fall on your ass," I quip back teasingly.
"Cockiness is a must in this business. At work I'm a Grade-A asshole, but it's what keeps us on top. I never want you to see the man I have to be when I'm there." I wonder if that's what Dad was always referring to when he said things similar, such as, he left work at work and home at home. Do all self-employed business owners have two different personalities? That sounds exhausting.
"What-"
"Am I interrupting?" We both turn as Macie walks into the kitchen in her pajamas. It’s the first time she's spoken to me since that night.
"Not at all. I was just making breakfast. I'm sure you're hungry. Sit and I'll make you a plate." She nods and pulls out a stool at the bar. I remove a clean plate from the cabinet and add a scoop of eggs and a piece of ham. She stands and walks over to the refrigerator at the same time I set her plate in front of her on the bar. "Are you looking for something?"
Preston removes a coffee mug and pours it full of black coffee. "Do you have any ketchup?" Preston and I look at each other as he takes a sip from his cup, both thinking the same thing. We look at her in unison and he places his cup on the top of the bar.
"It's in the door, but why do you want ketchup?" I point in the direction as I speak.
"For my eggs," she says and instantly my face gives away what that sounds like to me. She laughs as she pulls the bottle out of the door and walks back to her seat. "I get that reaction to a lot of food preferences that I have."
As if the sheer thought of what she is going to do with that ketchup isn't bad enough, she opens the cap and squeezes it in a zigzag formation over the top of her scrambled eggs. I can imagine I have a look of horror and disgust spread out across my face. Without saying anything, I reach in the drawer and take a fork. I hand it to her and she looks amused by my reaction. "Don't knock it 'til you try it."
I get an odd feeling that means more than trying various and weird combinations of food. I may need to cross-examine that phrase and reiterate it at a later time when we're alone. "Have you enjoyed your stay, Macie?"
Preston's voice reminds me there are more important topics at hand right now. He looks at his watch, meaning he's running short on time. "It's been great and much needed. Thank y'all for giving me a place to stay. I'll be out of your way in a few hours," she says as she picks up her glass of juice.
"That's actually what we wanted to talk to you about." She sets her glass back down and looks between the two of us.
"What do you mean? Is there a problem?"
Preston doesn't waste any time before he picks up right where he left off. "I don't know how much Kinzleigh has told you about me, but my family has established a very wealthy business investing in real estate across the country, and now in the process of expanding into other countries. I don't have the time to give you the full run down, but the gist is that we develop the land that we purchase and manage it ourselves or resell it once it's complete for a profit, among other things that are irrelevant at this time. I've been in the process of looking for a personal assistant and Kinzleigh mentioned you might be interested and that you would be a good candidate."
Her eyes widen and she sets down her fork. "Are you serious?"
He reaches in his pocket and pulls out a folded piece of paper. "I never joke about business. The company will provide living arrangements, transportation and childcare in exchange for twenty-four hour availability; travel is a requirement. You will be with me at all times unless I instruct you otherwise."
He places the folded piece of paper on the counter in front of him and slides it to the other side. "This is starting pay. Raise evaluation will take place after ninety days and all other benefits will be discussed upon acceptance of the offer."
She picks up the piece of paper in her small hands. Preston continues to sip on his coffee while he waits. When she opens the sheet of paper and scans the details her mouth drops. Her eyes begin to gloss over when she looks at him. "That's more in one month than I currently make in a year. Is this correct?"
"I don't make mistakes. It's not a small decision. This is no job you've ever done and there is a lot you will have to learn and take on. It's a hectic schedule and should you commit, you'll be well compensated. Prove your worth and it will only increase. You will be at my every beck and call as my assistant, but I take care of the things that belong to me." He places his hand back in the pocket of his pants, letting the information linger in the air. I've never been involved in a business deal before. I almost feel like I'm intruding.
She looks down at the piece of paper again. "When would I have to be moved here to start?"
He places his empty cup in the sink and walks over to the bar stool next to her, grabbing his jacket that is hanging on the back. "I will accommodate you with means necessary to get moved here. You are required to be moved and ready to work the Monday before the charity event in August. It's the last Monday of the month. That gives you a little under two months to make preparations and get settled. Your residence is ready whenever you want to move in."
She looks a little overwhelmed. I notice her grab a necklace that is hanging beneath her shirt and close her eyes. I've never noticed it before. When she opens her eyes she looks between her enclosed fist and the paper in her opposite hand. It occurs to me that she said she is still living in that town because of Beau being buried there. She doesn't want to leave him with his parents here; I'm not sure she even knows where his parents moved. Maybe, she needs time to think it over.
Before I can say anything to try and alleviate her being put on the spot she answers. "I'll take it." She looks up and straightens her shoulders. "I would like to accept the offer."
He shakes his jacket out that is hooked on his fingers and rounds the bar, walking in my direction. "Good. Then it's settled. I'll get your number from Kinzleigh and she will give you mine. I have to get going, but I'll be in touch." He grabs my chin between his thumb and index finger, drawing me closer to his lips. He kisses me so soft I can barely feel it.
"A car will pick the both of you up in two hours. He will have instructions on where to go and a key to her house. Go shopping and spend some money. You've been in this house too long. A company event is coming up I know the two of you need dresses for. You have your card, use it." I nod and he takes a few steps in the direction of the garage.
He stops beside Macie. "Clear your schedule for today and cancel your flight. Kinzleigh will take care of everything you need for the p
arty and you can leave it at your house. Money will be wired to your account as an acceptance bonus as well as a wardrobe allowance. You will reflect me, so I expect you to dress like it. You now work for me full time and you will be compensated accordingly, biweekly, from this day forward. Sever your contracts with previous employers."
He looks down at his watch again. "The car will deliver you to the company jet at six o'clock sharp. I'm giving you this break to inform your family, move, and get you and your son settled here, in your home, with necessary arrangements, so you are ready to work at the deadline already set. No alternate agreements will be made. The itinerary in between now and D-day is up to you. Message me the date you want to be picked up. I will make arrangements for movers and the plane to be there promptly and on schedule. Use your time wisely."
Without another word he exits the room. The two of us stand here speechless and our mouths’ gaping. I've never seen this side of Preston before. What exactly just happened? Does some kind of magical business witch get summoned when a member of his family takes their place in the famous Dunagin Empire to bestow assertiveness and power upon them? He's barely out of college for crying out loud. I thought that came with age, not wealth. I should know by now that nothing is ever as we think it is anyway. "I guess that's our cue to get ready," I say and glance over at her.
She looks like a terrified bunny in the middle of a lion’s den. I can't say that I blame her. I was raised around those types of people and I still am not used to it, especially not on Preston. I think he was right. I don't want to know what he's like at work. "I guess so," she responds quietly.
We both exit in opposite directions. Maybe I'll get the chance to talk to her, after all. I need someone's advice on Preston and I and a baby that I'm incubating that doesn't come from his seed. I'm confused and I need an opinion from someone on the outside looking in, someone that can put it in perspective for me. I don't want to be viewed as a tramp or whore, but the fact remains that Breyson isn't here and he's never coming back. I need someone that has stepped over that line and been with a man sexually after her one and only is no longer an option.
***
The doorbell begins pinging downstairs. The car must be here. I slip on my flip-flops. I decided comfort is more important at this size than cuteness. A cotton maxi dress and flip-flops will have to do. I know what happens when I go shopping and I don’t want my feet to hate me. I spritz myself with perfume and grab my purse.
Macie is already standing at the door when I make it to the bottom of the stairs. She gives me a small smile as I set the alarm and we walk out the door together. The driver holds the back door open allowing us to enter. Macie gets in first. "Miss Baker, I hope you are well today," he says tipping his hat with his free hand.
"I am, thank you, Bernard." Preston has made him my permanent chauffeur for the time being; something to do with my aging pregnancy and not wanting me to be alone, but I think there are other reasons backing it. It was annoying at first, but I’m starting to enjoy not having to drive. Once on the seat I slide over allowing him to close the door. We sit in an awkward silence as the driver gets behind the wheel and pulls out of the driveway.
"I'm sorry," we blurt out in unison. "Me too," we shout again together. It causes us both to laugh.
"You go first," she says nudging me playfully.
I'll try this one more time. Hopefully, I don't screw it up this time. "I'm not great with words, but give me a chance and I'll try to explain." When she nods, I gather my thoughts. "Rye is a great guy as long as you're just in the friend zone. He's kind of cynical when it comes to being in a relationship. Trust me, it takes one to know one. He's only interested in girls for one thing, which was the opposite of me. I slept with no one and he sleeps with everyone that draws his attention.”
She doesn’t look upset so I keep going. “It's none of my business if you only want the same thing in return, but I know and understand what you've been through. I was only trying to protect you, because I've seen girls at my school start hooking up with him, thinking they could handle the whole friend with benefits thing, and then they fall hard for him. When he sees that look on a girl he cuts it off every single time, and he can sense it a mile away."
She stares straight ahead nodding her head to acknowledge that she heard me. "It was nothing. We were just having fun. He just made me feel things that I haven't felt in..." She closes her eyes and her voice lowers to a whisper. "So long. I knew I was going back home, but I've been miserable for so long that I just wanted to hold onto that feeling for a little while. Does that make sense?"
Her mouth says it's nothing, but her eyes tell another story. There is more to it than what she's giving away, but I don't comment. Instead, I think back on how miserable I was back in Mississippi. Everything around me was a constant reminder of the time Breyson and I shared and the love we had for each other. Everywhere I went and everything I saw brought back the memories and it felt like my heart was rupturing all over again. I don't think I ever would have been able to move on there, just as she hasn't.
I'm pretty sure each person has a switch; something that snaps them out of the trance they fall into when something crucial and unfortunate happens in their life. When we are lost we want to be found. We want to find that one way out of the maze that we keep wandering around in. Preston was my out. He was one piece of happiness that existed before I met Breyson, so when he reached into the water as I was drowning; I grabbed on and held on for as long as I could. His investment in me, first as a friend, and second, as a lover, has helped me to find happiness again. That happiness blossomed into love. Nurse a wounded animal back to health and he'll never stray.
"I think I understand." A few seconds pass between us, and houses come and go as we continue down the street.
"It's because of you, you know." I look over at her. I'm not sure what she means. "That I let myself have a night to remember. It's because of your example. I've always lived with this guilt that because I lived and he died I should live in misery, but you proved me wrong."
"How? I didn't do anything."
"Oh, but you did. When I found out that you moved to California I was angry. I was angry, because I was still stuck there carrying the burden of his death and you were moving on. I came here to see why you were so different and why you could so easily move on after his death, but I couldn't." She looks out the window, but she continues talking.
"When I got here I watched you. I realized that you were hurting just like me, but the difference was you were coping and I was burying. We can't control tragic circumstances in life no matter what the situation is or how much we hurt as a result. You and Preston showed me that love is more of a verb and not a noun. Losing one person in love doesn't have to be final, disallowing you another attempt to have that again. I may not ever love someone again like I loved Beau, but if I can at least try to make each day better than the one before, I've accomplished greatness." She begins holding that necklace that she keeps tucked beneath her shirt again.
"You got all that from me?" I guess we are our own worse critics, because I didn't think I was fairing that well.
She nods. "It's why I allowed him to take me to bed and it's the same reason I took the job. I wanted to see if being with another man the way I was last with Beau would help me to let him go and work towards being happy again. My mind has been my enemy for so long that I finally just surrendered."
She hit the hammer on the nail and there is only one thing that I want to know. "Did it work?"
My heart rate picks up a little as I wait on the answer to the question I've been asking since I moved back to California. "So much so that I almost feel a different kind of guilt." Instantly, a tear spills out of her eye. "The weight gone is foreign, but I finally feel like I can breathe. It was almost too much to bear. Don't feel guilty for what you have with Preston; embrace it. Whatever you can do to free yourself from the chains that bind you, do it. No one should be incarcerated forever. It won't bring them b
ack."
When she speaks, I can tell some of the burden she's been carrying has been lifted. There is only one difference. "Do you think it would be wrong to sleep with Preston while carrying Breyson's child? Be honest, woman to woman."
She wipes her fingers underneath her eye to check for eyeliner smudges. "Honestly, if Breyson was alive and the two of you just broke up then yes, I would see something wrong with it. Out of respect, it wouldn't be appropriate to have sex with a man while another man has no say in your actions when you're carrying his child, but you didn't break up, Kinzleigh. He died and he's never coming back. In the physical sense, sex isn't going to do anything to that baby. The baby is deep in your womb above your cervix that is still closed until you get closer to delivery. I wouldn't recommend sleeping around, but having sex with your fiancé is normal, pregnant or not. It's not a health call; it's an ethical one. It's no one's business but your own; therefore, if you can live with it and it helps you strengthen your bond with Preston, then who gives a damn about everyone else and what they think. No one else has to walk in your shoes, but you."
She does make a good point. I guess I just needed to hear it from someone else. I've always been drilled by my parents that reputation is everything, and once it's ruined you can never get it back. I need to stop worrying about so much, I suppose. My thoughts always steer me to another topic of conversation. "Macie, can I ask you a question?"
"Anything."
"Why won't you come clean about what happened? You know, about what happened with that guy. Why do you have to suffer when you did nothing wrong? Don't you think Talon will start asking questions about Beau's family?" I can tell that we're getting close to our destination when a subdivision comes into view.
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