by Alina Jacobs
Liz had a smile plastered on her face, but she didn’t seem that into the conversation.
"Do you like your drink?" Allie asked her.
"It's great," Liz said too brightly. "I actually have to go, Carter," Liz told him, standing up abruptly.
"Oh, okay." Carter paid the tab while Liz pushed through the crowd to the door.
Not waiting to grab his card back from Allie, he ran after Liz.
"I’ll take you home," he said, stopping next to her on the sidewalk outside of the bar.
"No need. I’m calling a car," she said, looking at her phone.
"I’ll wait with you."
"You don’t have to do that," Liz told him.
"What’s wrong?" Carter asked.
"Why did you invite me out?" she demanded.
Carter was confused. He had had a great evening.
"I don’t know. My cousin suggested it, I guess, and you’re a nice girl from a good family."
"I'm not going to marry someone who’s in love with someone else!" she said and started crying.
"Whoa," Carter said, patting her awkwardly on the back. "Who said anything about marriage? And what do you mean in love with someone else?"
"Allie!" she said. "You two have a history, obviously."
"Yes, but we’re just friends. We share a dog."
"You love her," Liz said as the car pulled up and she climbed in.
"I don't—"
"I think we’ll just stay coworkers," she told him and shut the door.
Carter was so confused He walked back into the Olive and Twist. It was starting to clear out, and he sat back down at the bar.
"That didn’t seem to go well," he muttered. "Can you make me another drink?"
"No," Allie said.
"Why are you being so mean to me?" He grabbed her hand. "I know you sleep with customers. Why are you acting so weird about us?"
She tugged her hand back. "We're through, Carter. No more. I'm not your dirty secret. I know your family hates me, and you paid me to make them hate me, and that's fine. But I don't belong in your world. You are on that side of the bar, and I'm on this side." She held out his card and ordered, "Go home."
Grant and Kate were waiting up for him.
"So how did it go?"
"Eh," Carter said.
"You didn’t screw it up, did you, Carter?" Kate said disapprovingly.
"Who knows?" he said, thinking of Allie. Liz was so sure he was in love with her.
"It will be okay," Grant told him. "You’re still trying to acclimate to civilian life. You just need to find a purpose, something to make everything clear."
Carter thought about Allie. That was what he had had, until he ruined it.
"How do you know?" he asked Grant. "How do you know you’ve found your purpose, the thing you’re looking for?"
"It feels right," Grant said. "It seems difficult, but it doesn't matter because it is as if you can’t do anything else. It feels inevitable."
33
Allie
Allie was so upset after she kicked Carter out of the bar. She cried on the way back to the studio apartment.
How could she have been so stupid? Carter didn't love her. He had taken Liz out on a date—a real one, something he would never do for her. She felt suffocated by the weight of growing up in a poor area, attending terrible schools, and scraping out a meager existence.
When she returned to Arnold's apartment, she deleted all the pictures of Carter off of her computer, cleared out her bookmarks, and deleted his text messages. She was making a fresh start.
She still had to contend with the collateral damage, however.
"So how was your date?" she asked Liz the next day.
"Is this some sort of a joke to you?" Liz snapped then ran off into the bathroom.
Allie followed her and knocked on the stall door. "What’s wrong, Liz? Let me in."
"No," Liz said.
Allie could hear her sobbing.
"What happened?"
"You know what happened. He’s in love with you, not me."
"That isn’t true at all!" Allie said, stunned. "We had sex. It meant nothing to him. We didn't even do it in a bed."
"Carter's such a sociopath," Liz said, opening up the stall door.
Allie handed her a tissue and hugged Liz.
"I feel like I've cried more since I came to New York than anywhere else," her coworker said, dabbing her eyes. "It's such a horrible city. Why is life so unfair? I just want a happily ever after."
"You already have it," Allie said, barely containing her annoyance. "You have a great apartment all to yourself, you have money, a nice family, siblings, people who care about you. I have none of that. You know where I live? On a couch in some creepy guy's apartment. I come back, and he’s playing porn and jacking off on the sofa, which is where I sleep, I might add. Everything I own is in my car, which I’m paying twenty percent of my income just to park in this horrible city. You already have a happily ever after. So what if something doesn’t go right for you for the first time in your life? Welcome to my world. Pick yourself up and be an adult and handle your business. You don’t like it? You change it. Don’t feel sorry for yourself, though. No one has time for that. And no one has the patience for it."
Liz wiped her face. Her lip was still trembling. Allie felt bad about snapping at Liz. The speech was really almost for her own benefit, a splash of cold water to wake her up from her dreams about Carter.
"I guess you’re right," Liz said finally. "I was just envisioning our wedding and finally not being the only person in my friend group not to even have had a real boyfriend."
Allie patted Liz's hair back in place.
"Men are overrated," Allie said.
"And so are weddings to be honest. Brandy is giving me a headache. Look," she said, pulling out her phone.
Allie scrolled through the scores of messages Brandy had sent just that morning. "Goodness," she said. "She needs a wedding planner, no?"
"She has already had two of them quit."
Allie didn't know what to say to that. She was glad it wasn't her.
"Do you seriously live in a dump?" Liz asked after a moment.
Allie nodded.
"I'd say come live with me, but I have a studio, so I’m not sure it will help you."
"Don’t worry about it," Allie said. "It's only temporary. Plus I’m saving a fortune on rent."
"I have to meet with Brandy today," Liz told her as she fixed her makeup in the mirror. "Why don't you come and help? You could meet some more people and keep me from tearing out my hair."
Allie didn't want to, but she felt bad about Carter and about blowing up at Liz. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt just to help. "Okay," she said, relenting.
Liz beamed. "Also, I need to plan a bachelorette weekend," she told Allie.
Allie mentally calculated how much money that would be. She told herself she didn't really have to go anywhere, since she certainly wasn’t going to be asked to be a bridesmaid.
When Liz took her to meet Brandy, Allie thought the woman looked like a spider or a Disney villain—her gaze was piercing, her nails were long and sharp, and her hair was glossy and swung dangerously around her.
Allie stood in front of Brandy, and the bride-to-be clicked her nails on the table as she inspected Allie.
"Who is this, Liz?" she asked finally with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.
"This is Allie," Liz said nervously. "She's going to help me plan your wedding."
"Allie." Brandy carefully looked her up and down.
Allie felt inadequate in her thrift-store professional wear. She wondered if this was how Carter and his family truly looked at her. Maybe they were just better at hiding their derision.
"Where did you find her?" Brandy asked, turning up her nose.
"We, um—"
"We work together," Allie interjected. "I've had quite a lot of experience planning parties and large events."
"This is a wedding," Br
andy interrupted.
"I’m sure you have an excellent wedding planner," Allie said snidely.
Brandy sniffed. "The woman is useless. That is why I need my bridesmaids, none of whom seem to be available to assist me in this most important event of my life."
"How shocking," Allie said.
"Since no one else seems to be willing to step up, especially not Kate," she spat the name, "I suppose you will have to do. Goodness knows Liz can't handle it on her own."
"Great," Allie said, trying to keep her face professional.
"You are allowed to be one of my bridesmaids."
Allie resisted the urge to roll her eyes.
Brandy motioned for them to sit. "There are wedding events coming up, and I need you two to help plan the bridal tea, the engagement party, and the couple's shower, plus the bachelorette party."
As Brandy ticked off to-do items, Allie felt herself sink into the distraction of party planning.
This would be just the ticket to help her forget about Carter.
34
Carter
Carter thought about what Liz had said. He felt bad about the way he had treated her and especially how he'd treated Allie. He had never actually taken Allie out on a date. Was it too late? What should he do? He couldn't take her to a bar. What did people do on dates if they didn't want to go for drinks? Dinner? Sushi? Would she even like that? Would she even say yes?
The energy between them was tense. Liz and Allie were curt with him—they didn't go out to lunch, and Carter was only given as much interaction with them as was professionally necessary.
Liz bought ferns and placed them between Carter's desk and hers and Allie's so that he was effectively walled off.
"I can't believe they're doing this to me," he complained to Grant.
"You'd better start groveling. Maybe you could plan an expensive apology present for Liz and a nice vacation for Allie. "
"She doesn't take vacation. She works all day, every day."
"I cannot fathom how you managed to find time to fuck her in the storage room twice a day," Kate said tartly.
Grant's jaw dropped. "Language, Kate!"
Carter thought about what he could do, but they already had a work trip booked, and any plans would have to wait until after.
The internship program was taking them all to Oslo on a business trip. They were going to visit several businesses that the Holbrooks owned or worked with, including a Norwegian shipping company, a weapons-system manufacturer, and a clean-energy company.
As they were herded into the chartered plane, Carter had flashbacks to flying out for his combat deployments. But here the plane was nicer and the company much better looking.
Allie and Liz studiously ignored him as they talked about Brandy's wedding. The interns had been assigned seating based on their departments.
"This is going to be a terrible flight," Carter said to no one in particular as he settled down in his seat beside Allie and Liz.
After they landed early the next morning, cleared customs, and checked into the hotel, the interns were immediately taken to start the day's activities.
"This is how it is in business," Monique told them on the bus ride over to their first meeting. "You will land and be expected to hit the ground running." Allie seemed alert and attentive, but Carter could barely concentrate on the Holbrook subsidiary representatives as they talked about the cutting-edge products and services the data centers offered.
Liz's words to him banged around in his head.
You're in love with Allie. Was he? Love was a strong word. He sure hadn't treated her very nicely.
His gaze wandered outside. It was snowing, even though it was almost spring. It continued to snow throughout the rest of the day and into the evening.
At dinner that night, Carter had to sit with Grant and the other Holbrook Enterprises higher-ups. He saw Allie across the room but turned his attention back to the table when one of the men addressed him.
"How are you adjusting to life outside of the military?" asked Hans, one of the founders of the Norwegian green-energy company Grant had just bought.
"Fine, I guess," Carter replied.
"I fought with Grant in Afghanistan," Hans said. "I know it can be difficult to readjust."
"Hans helped me land that shipping contract," Grant explained. "His dad owns the company."
"Yes, but I didn't want to just work for my father. I wanted to do my own thing. That's why I founded my business."
"It’s a great company," Carter said. "Fostering energy independence and helping the environment."
"After fighting overseas, I don't want my country to be reliant on foreign energy," Hans said seriously.
It was dark when they were finally released. Allie once again did not have a warm coat, Carter noticed. She shivered as she walked ahead of him. He hurried to catch up with her, his dress shoes sliding on the icy sidewalk.
"Wait up," he said.
She didn't stop and barely turned her head to look at him.
"What is it, Carter?"
"Hey, Carter," Vance said. "There's a great club that just opened. It's super fancy. You in?"
"Nah, I'm good," Carter said.
Vance gave him a strange look. "What else do you have going on?"
"Does it matter?"
They all stopped next to a storefront, and the rest of the interns streamed around them, hurrying for the hotel to escape the cold.
Vance looked between Allie and Carter, a look of disgust on his face. Allie looked upset, and Carter could feel his anger rising.
"Carter," he sneered, "I expected better of you."
Digby chuckled, and Carter hauled back and slugged Vance in the face.
"Stop it!" Allie yelled.
She grabbed Carter, but her feet slid on the ice. Her motions threw Carter off balance, and he slid into Vance, taking him down to the ground.
"What are you doing, Carter? Are you fighting?" Grant yelled, furious as he came over to them. "I can't take you anywhere."
"He just punched me out of nowhere," Vance said as blood streamed down his face.
Grant looked between Vance, Carter, and Allie.
"I thought you were done with her," Grant spat.
Carter opened his mouth to protest.
"I don't want to hear it," Grant warned. "Come with me. You… Digby, right? Take Vance to the hospital."
As they followed Grant back to the hotel, Allie seemed annoyed. As soon as the three of them were alone in Grant's suite, Allie lit into Carter's cousin.
"Why are you treating me like this?" she demanded. "Carter is an adult. He can make his own choices. I am not a witch manipulating him with magic or something. You all didn't want Carter around me. Now he's not. What he does is not my problem."
"I know you two were having a workplace affair," Grant interrupted. "I thought I would overlook it. After all, Kate and I started our relationship when we were sort of working together, so I understand. But now it's causing Carter to fight people in the middle of the street. Carter, you are going to be helping to run this company soon. You need to act like it."
"What if I don't want to? Maybe I'll start my own company," Carter said hotly.
Grant barked out a laugh. "No, you won't. What if you had been arrested? It could have been all over the news. As it is, Vance will probably talk."
Carter glowered.
"Get out of my sight," Grant ordered. "I need to call Kate and figure out what to do."
Carter was steaming mad as he left Grant's suite.
"I'm going to kill Vance," he growled.
"No, you aren't," Allie told him as she pushed the button for the elevator. "Go to your room."
"Come with me," he pleaded.
He pulled her to him and kissed her in the hallway. She pushed him away and stepped into the elevator. Carter followed her as she made her way to her room.
"There you are," Liz said, poking her head out of her room. "Oh, hi, Carter."
Liz loo
ked a little hurt to see him. Carter felt bad, but he really wanted Allie. She unlocked her door, and Carter was about to push his way past her when his phone rang. Allie slammed the door in his face as he answered and heard his father's voice.
"You need to be more in control of yourself. What is wrong with you? And now I hear you're back with that girl, Allie? She's causing all this trouble."
"Kate is calling me," he said, "I have to go."
"Don't you dare—"
"Hi, Kate," Carter said.
"Don't sound so dejected," she told him.
"I screwed up."
"I'll fix it. Don't worry about it. But stay away from Allie, okay? Your father is on my case about it. Plus she's an employee."
"But she's not my employee," he retorted.
"Just chill, Carter," Kate warned.
He didn't think he could. Even though it was cold outside, his body felt hot, and Allie was all he could think about.
35
Allie
Oslo was perfect. Allie had never been out of the country before, and she had felt like a different person as she quickly unpacked in her upscale hotel room. The Scandinavian décor was understated and imbued a minimalist functionality. The clean lines and natural woods were pleasing and helped ease the slight headache she had from the flight. Lying back on the clean bed, she felt calm and at peace for the first time. She luxuriated in being by herself.
Her headache returned that night after she yelled at Grant.
"I cannot believe this," she muttered to herself as she showered. She was so upset she couldn't even enjoy the large bathroom.
She checked her phone. There was nothing from Arnold about how her dog was doing. Allie hoped Margot was okay. She felt sick leaving the dog with her landlord. He seemed as if he was keeping her alive, though, which was good since Carter seemed to have lost interest in the animal.
"Figures," she muttered.
Carter was such a flake.
Liz knocked on the shared door between their two rooms, opened it, and came in with snacks and alcohol from the mini bar.
"Sit. Spill. Now," she ordered. "What is going on between you and Carter?"