“It unhooks in the front. It’s a tricky one,” she giggled.
He couldn’t resist kissing her dimple. He ran his hands up the front of her pajama top, lightly stroking her belly. He ran his hands over her breasts, using his thumbs to tease her nipples. He kissed her. She opened her legs and wiggled closer to him. He found the clasp to unhook the bra between her breasts.
His hands were trembling slightly. “How?”
“Here, I’ll show you.” Closing her eyes, she lowered herself onto the bed and pulled up her pajama top. “See? Up and in. Then apart. Now your turn.”
“Oh, boy.”
He pulled her top down and unhooked the bra. He slipped it out from under her shirt.
“You’re no fun tonight,” she grumbled.
He kissed her. “What side of the bed do you want?”
“The same side as usual. Did you pack pajamas in your overnight bag or are you going naked?” She climbed under the covers.
“I brought pajamas. I’ll be right back.”
“I don’t get a show? Bummer.” She curled up and tried to wait for him.
He went into the bathroom and took off his suit. He hung it up behind the bathroom door. He changed into his pajamas. His heart was pounding. He had been so lonely without her. He was simply happy to be close to her again. His plan had been to talk when they got to her house, but she was in such bad shape, it would have to wait.
He loved her. She loved him. That wasn’t going to change. They could argue and tease each other to the point of cruelty, but they weren’t going to stop loving each other. He padded out to her bed. She was fast asleep. He crawled in beside her and pulled her towards him. He wrapped his arm around her waist.
He kissed the back of her head. “Good night, Meara. I love you. I’ve missed you so much.”
She mumbled. “Night, Duncan. Love. Miss.”
The last part was almost inaudible, but he smiled. He knew what she meant. They fell into a deep, relaxed sleep. He had gotten used to her moving around and sleeping in weird positions, but tonight, she didn’t move. She had gotten used to his snoring, but he was silent. They were both exhausted and relieved.
Chapter Thirty-Six
A few hours later, he heard the low mewling sound he had heard at the Shore house. While sleeping, she had pulled away, leaving a gap between them. The mewling became louder. She was having a nightmare. She hadn’t told them what the recent nightmares were about, but he remembered the one at the Shore house.
“Meara?” He touched her on the shoulder.
She was rigid. She couldn’t move. She was in a deep dream.
“Duncan? Where are you?” she asked.
“Meara, where are you?”
“At the Shore house, in our bedroom. I tried everywhere. Where are you?”
“I’m right here.”
“No. Why do you disappear? Where are you?”
“Meara, come to me. I’m here.”
“I don’t see you,” she cried. “What did I do wrong? Why are you gone?”
“I’m right here. I love you. Come to me. I’m in your bed at home. Do you see me now?”
“There’s someone in the bed. If I touch you, you’ll disappear.”
“I promise I won’t disappear. I’ll hold your hand. Trust me.”
“No. You’ll disappear again. Please don’t leave me,” she sobbed.
She was paralyzed. He pulled her into his arms. She was frightening him. She didn’t respond to his touch.
“Meara! Listen to me. I’m right here in your bed. You need to reach out and take my hand. You’re scaring me. Take my hand so you can wake up. Do it now.”
He held her hand tightly, rocking her back and forth. He had tears in his eyes. He had no idea the nightmares were this bad.
“Duncan. There you are.” Her sobbing stopped, but she was still asleep. “I found you.”
“Yes, sweetheart, you did it. You found me.” He kissed her forehead and caressed her face. “Wake up, Meara. Wake up.”
Her body relaxed. She could move again. Her eyes opened.
“What happened?” she asked.
“You were having a nightmare. How long has this been going on?”
“The first one was at the Shore house. Every night since then, I’ve had one.”
“Even the night we had the argument and you slept downstairs? You had one then?”
“Yes. They’ve gotten worse. One night, I woke up screaming. In the dream, I’m looking for you and when I reach out for you, you disappear. It makes me sick to my stomach.”
“You have an ulcer. We’ll fix that. What happened in this dream?”
“I was at the Shore house again. I heard you calling me. Then I was here. You wanted me to hold your hand. I was afraid, but you told me to do it. I trusted you and when I took your hand, you were there. Then you were telling me to wake up.”
“I’m worried. It sounds like nightmare or dream anxiety disorder. When you wake up, you remember the dreams. Your lack of sleeping and eating is affecting you, making you anxious. I don’t like the sleep paralysis. You couldn’t move. I’m sorry, Meara.” Squeezing her close, he kissed her.
“Why am I having these nightmares?”
“Have you ever had recurring nightmares before?”
“No.”
“And the first one was at the Shore house?”
“Yes.”
“I snuck out the night you had the first one. If you were anxious and I left you alone, you may have sensed I was gone. Then in your dream, you started to look for me. The dream may have been my fault.”
“I didn’t know you left. It’s possible I sensed it, but it’s no reason for me to have it over and over again.”
“But then we had the argument. I hope spending time together gets rid of the nightmares. If we do, you may not have them again.”
“Are you sure you’re not making excuses to spend the weekend with me? I noticed how you invited yourself over. Or are you my Dr. Duncan now? I’m a very sick patient, Dr. Duncan. I know you have what can cure me.” She giggled, holding her hand to her forehead.
“It will take intensive diagnostic screening and unorthodox methods of treatment, but I have a cure. Now please hold still while I examine you. MEARA! I can’t believe how easily you drive me crazy. Yes, I did invite myself over. I want to be with you. I missed you. I’m sorry I hurt you. I didn’t mean to upset you. I love you.”
“I love you too. I should have listened to you. I’m sorry I pushed you away.”
“You’re pretty good at being mean when you want, Lady Meara. I don’t want to fight with you. We’ll discuss this calmly. Since June, I’ve been seeing your tender side and now, I’ve seen your feisty side. I don’t like being your target. Let’s see if we can clip your sharp claws a little, my sweet little kitten.” Holding her in his arms, he kissed her gently.
“You have it bad if you think I’m a sweet little kitten. I’m more like a bad-tempered hellcat. I have been a little feisty lately. It was going to come out sooner or later. I’m not the only one with a temper. You have physical passion for me, but it’s nice to see you have emotional passion as well, Mr. Green-Eyed Monster.”
“Of course I do. Doesn’t a little bit of jealousy come with the territory? I want to be the only one to make you purr, even if you’re a hellcat at times. Since we’re all snuggled up here in bed, may I tell you a bedtime story?”
“I could use a saucer of milk and an ear scritch,” she giggled. “Are you sure you don’t want to examine me first, Dr. Duncan?”
“There’ll be time for that later. Let me tell you a story.”
She cuddled close. “I’m ready.”
“Once upon a time, there was a mild-mannered scholar who loved books. He liked to dream about faraway places. He was not an adventurous person by nature, so he stayed close to home. He met a wonderful, caring woman. They fell in love and married. Their life together was good and they had two strong sons. The scholar loved his wife, but as tim
e went on, he longed for adventure.”
“Like Bilbo Baggins, in a way.”
“Yes. Now please don’t interrupt,” he smirked.
She rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue.
“The scholar worked hard and put away his desire for adventure. Then his wife became ill and died after a long illness. He missed her very much and he wanted to be left alone. He buried himself in books. His heart was heavy and he grew old. He put the thought of adventures out of his mind.
“Then one day, he met a lady. She was beautiful. When she smiled, it was like the sun was shining just for him. She had beautiful blue eyes and hair the color of warm sand. When she looked into his eyes, it was as if the world stopped turning. It was just the two of them in that moment. And she only had eyes for him. He became her knight in shining armor.
“She made his heart beat again. He always wanted to be with her. He had been so lonely. She had made him happier than he had ever been just by being herself. He had loved his wife, but this lady was in his heart. No, this lady was his heart. Over time, the knight learned the lady loved him too. He couldn’t believe his luck.
“But a wicked witch poisoned his mind by speaking what he feared most. He wasn’t afraid the lady would leave him. She loved him too much for that. He was afraid of growing old again. His lady had made him feel truly alive for the first time in his life. He never wanted to be without her. It would break his heart.”
Choking up, Duncan stopped speaking. Meara’s eyes were filled with tears.
“Did they live happily ever after?” she whispered.
“I don’t know. The ending isn’t written yet. Their story isn’t over. The knight is wandering now. He’s lost without his lady and hopes she will take him back.”
“Of course she will. She never really let him go. Even when she was saying some pretty awful things, she still loved her knight. She hopes the knight will come back to her after his adventure.”
“But Meara, the lady is the knight’s adventure. Everything about her is so new to him, so different from anyone he’s known before. He can’t wait to see what she’ll do next. He’s amazed by her. Their greatest adventure will be to hold hands and fight the dragons together.”
“I’m sure the lady would love nothing more than to have her knight beside her. I know she wants to be in his arms and to have him kiss her.”
“Kissing his lady is very dangerous. It makes him want to do other things with her. He’s not sure if it’s the right time to do that.”
She shifted in his arms, reaching up and pulling him to her. She kissed him. She ran her hands into his hair. He returned her kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist.
“It’s the right time, Sir Duncan. Your lady needs you. She wants you,” she whispered.
He pulled her to her knees. He quickly had his hands under her pajama top, kissing her with a sense of urgency. He had missed their intimacy and he ached to touch her. She kissed him deeply, slipping her hands inside his underwear. She was delighted to find he was aroused. He pulled her pajama top off and sucked hungrily on her nipples. She pushed his underwear off over his hips. He pushed down her panties and nuzzled her neck. She pulled off his shirt.
They looked into each other’s eyes. She lay back among the pillows while he pushed between her knees. He kissed her and entered her with an insistent thrust. She gasped, running her hands over his chest. She nodded her head encouragingly. He thrust as she lifted her hips. The urgency increased and she lost control.
“Duncan. Yes, Duncan. Please,” she cried, her back rigid. “Oh!”
Breathing heavily, she braced herself against the headboard. She continued to thrust her hips, moaning softly. He grunted loudly while he orgasmed. She let go of the headboard and rocked with his last few thrusts. She took his face in her hands. She kissed him deeply, nibbling on his upper lip. She giggled.
He slid down beside her. “Why are you giggling?”
“It’s true what they say. Whoever they are.”
“What do they say?”
“They say makeup sex can be fantastic.”
“What do they say about makeup tickle fights?” he asked.
He ran his hands down her sides and behind her knees. He knew her weak spots. She laughed, trying to pull away from him. He hit a sensitive spot behind her left knee and she squealed. She tried desperately to wriggle out of his reach, but he pulled her back and pinned her arms with his hand. He held her down. She was breathing heavily.
“Do you give up?” he asked.
“No.” She struggled, but he held her fast. “Okay, I give up.”
“That was too easy. If I let you go, you’ll behave?”
“Sure.”
“I don’t trust you. You have that look in your eyes.”
“What look?” she asked innocently.
“The look that tells me if I let you go, you’ll attack me.”
“Smart man. So how do we declare a truce?”
“Forget truce. I declare myself victor and still king of the tickle fights.” He kissed her, but kept her pinned.
“How about this? I declare you the winner, you let me go and I tell you a bedtime story?”
“Deal.” He waited. “Go on.”
“I declare Duncan Phillips to be the victor and king of the tickle fights!”
He released her and she cuddled up with him.
“I’ll behave for now. Are you ready for your bedtime story?” she asked.
“Almost.”
He relaxed against the pillows. Her head rested on his chest. He pulled the blanket over them.
“Now you may begin,” he said.
“Once upon a time, there was a young peasant girl. She lived in a hard-working family. She loved books. She wanted to go places and to see things. She studied hard and made her father proud. He wanted more for his daughter than he had growing up. But the father was sad and one day, he took his own life.
“The girl had to take care of her family. She made sure her family was happy. The girl wanted more for her little sister than she had. One day, a prince came to the village. He was smitten with the girl because she seemed so sad. He was charming and kind. He courted her because she was like a bird with a broken wing. He wanted to fix her. She thought he loved her, so she began to love him.
“His family was not pleased with the prince’s choice. The parents thought the girl only wanted the comforts of being a prince’s wife. But the girl didn’t care about riches. She only wanted someone to love her for herself.”
Chapter Thirty-Seven
“The prince and the girl were married. The girl soon realized the prince did not love her the way she wanted to be loved. The prince saw the girl as a toy, something to be played with and then set aside on a shelf. His interest waned.
“The prince had affection for the girl, but he didn’t love her. It was maddening that he withheld his love. Trapped, the girl lived without love and alone. Who would believe the charming, kind prince was horrible? No one would believe her. Then one day, the prince fell ill and died.
“She was sad he had died, but she was also relieved. She never believed she would find anyone to love her. So she did what she knew best. She took care of her family. The girl was loved by her family, but she longed for the one who would speak to her heart.
“Then one day, her knight appeared, standing next to her with the deepest green eyes she had ever seen. She got lost in those eyes. His smile made his eyes dance. Her heart was slow to love him, but he was patient, kind and loving. He quietly let his feelings be known and he never overwhelmed her. Even the day he kissed her hand, the knight never made demands on her affections. She was being courted and she hoped this time was different.
“The feelings she had for the knight were returned. She found love to be a powerful thing when it was between two equals. The knight wanted to make a life together with the girl. One day, an evil witch put doubt into the knight’s mind. The girl listened to the knight speak his doubts and all she cou
ld hear were the prince’s false words. She pushed the knight away and ran. Had she been tricked again? Had the knight lied? Was she a fool?
“The further away she got from her knight, the more pain she felt. Doubt in her mind too, she feared she had pushed the knight away forever. She couldn’t eat or sleep knowing she had been wrong. She could blame it on the witch, but she had made her own mistakes. She waited for the knight to return.”
She cried, tears sliding down her cheeks. He pulled her close and held her chin. He covered her tears with kisses, taking them away. He shook his head and made her look into his eyes.
“No more pain. No more sadness. No more doubt. Your knight has returned. And you’re not a peasant girl. You’re a much loved lady. Your prince was a fool, a court jester. He didn’t deserve you and not for the last time, I wish I could punch him. Things are making more sense now I know your story. We have a lot to work on, but we’ll do it together. Do you understand?”
“Yes.” She tried not to cry, but the tears were still slipping down her cheeks.
He continued to kiss them away. “He abused you. He may not have harmed you physically, but he was abusing you by ignoring you and refusing to be intimate with you. He played games with your emotions. You know I would never do that?”
“I know. You aren’t him.”
“Damn right I’m not. If I had ever met him and found out what he was doing to you, I would have killed him.”
“If you had been able to meet him, we wouldn’t be in love. And I would never have told anyone. Please don’t tell Diana or Ben.”
“Meara, I would like to believe even if we weren’t in love, I would be your friend. Even if you didn’t tell me, I would figure it out. And I would do something about it. I won’t tell Diana or Ben, but you may want to at some point.”
“Diana knows something was wrong, but not how much it hurt me.” Calmer, she snuggled into his chest.
“You never learned to fight for yourself. I thought you would stay and fight with me at the Shore house. When you left, I couldn’t understand it, but now I do. I won’t let you run again. I thought I was giving you space to think. I should have gone after you. Until you learn to fight, I’ll follow you. It doesn’t mean I’ll do what you want, but I won’t let you curl up into a ball and waste away. Understood?”
The Swear Jar Page 29