“Wrong?” She let go of him.
“About my mother and father. Their love didn’t fail. It was never strong to begin with. Ours is.”
“Oh.”
Silence.
What? Had he thought she’d jump up and down for joy? Maybe she’d already moved on, put him behind her. He couldn’t let her go again.
“Lena. I’ve cared for many women. But I’ve never loved one before. It scared me to death, that I would fail, and destroy you.”
More silence. His shoulders bunched again. She was not making this easy.
“But I love you.”
“I know. Your friend with the boom box told me.” The slightest smile ghosted across her lips. “And then Andre was so kind. Like I was the daughter he never had, even after he lost everything.” She wiped at her eye with the back of her hand.
He laid his palms on her knees. “Lena, will you have me?”
“Of course.” She draped her hand over his like a cool damp cloth—a passionless resignation—not what he wanted at all. She went on looking at the wall. “I fell for you the moment you brought me to your room and read to me. If you’re sure you want me, there’s no way I can say no.”
This was not how it should have been. If he’d admitted it earlier, this declaration would have thrilled her, and he could have witnessed her exultation. But this bland acquiescence was all he deserved, even if it tasted like ash in his mouth.
“I do. I will, forever.”
“Good. Then it’s a deal.” She nodded, sounding matter of fact, like she’d just taken a perfectly cooked turkey out of the oven.
A deal—great. He sat back on his heels.
There, on the floor near the nightstand, was his answer—New and Selected Poems.
How could he have forgotten? “Uta told me something.”
“What’s that?”
At least he’d captured her attention enough to finally merit eye-contact. “How to make a baby.”
“A baby?” Her red-rimmed eyes widened, and her voice was barely a squeak.
His lips twitched at her hopeful response. “Or two, or three. A family.”
“But you said—”
“I was wrong.” Although it had some mysterious cost that hadn’t entirely escaped his worry.
Her mouth spread into a brilliant smile. “I’ve dreamed of him.”
“What?”
“For my entire life, I’ve dreamed of a little boy, and he has your eyes.”
She’d been carrying around that astonishing detail and never told him, let him walk away? He ached for her, one more heartbreak he hadn’t even known about. Then her meaning sunk in. A child. He’d never wanted a family. It was an impossibility, like walking in daylight. But she had seen their son—he was going to be a father.
If only he could be half as good at it as Andre.
He clutched her hands. “A boy?”
“His name is Mirko.”
He laughed, shaking his head with astonishment. “You dreamt a good Croatian name.”
“Is it? I didn’t know.” Her lips spread into the most beautiful smile he’d ever seen. A woman who knew she was loved and would have her heart’s desire.
It was too good to be true. The hair on his neck stood up again. What would it take to conceive this son? Would he look as much like Kos as Bel did Andre? Was the dreaded cost Uta had warned him about the same reason Andre had hidden the truth from Bel?
“Kos. Where did you go?”
“What?”
“Your eyes just went gray. You went somewhere else.”
“I’m sorry. I’m back.”
She was safe, and she loved him, and they would have a son. He couldn’t wait anymore. He picked her up, cradling her to his chest, drinking in her honeyed scent, the warm pink silk of her skin. He buried his face in the silk of her hair and sat her in his lap.
“Forever, Lena. I will love you forever. I can do it. I won’t hurt you.”
She laughed, reaching to cup his chin. “Of course you won’t.”
Somehow, after all his mistakes, she still trusted him. It was the greatest gift. His cock thought so too—it went rigid as she nestled closer to him.
She noticed, too, and wriggled. “Mmmmm. I missed that.”
He loosened his grip on her. “I’m sorry. I’m sure you’ll need time. I don’t expect you…”
She hopped up. “Kos. You need to be naked.”
Opening her towel, she revealed all her perfection. Her ample breasts were still rosy from the shower, and her nipples tightened as he studied at them. Her chest rose and fell, faster and faster. His eyes swept down her soft belly to the golden curls of her sex, and back up to her teasing smile. As their eyes locked, her lips parted lightly and her eyelids dipped over her navy blue irises.
“Naked. Yes, ma’am.” He pulled his sweater over his head, unbuttoned his slacks, and dropped them with his boxers in one motion. His cock bobbed proudly, and he wanted to climb all the way inside her.
“Do you ever wear jeans?” she asked. “I mean, if there was ever time a to be casual—”
“You want me to wear jeans. I’ll wear jeans. You want me to wear fishnets, fine. Right now, I’m naked, and so are you. I’m going to kiss you.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck, standing on her toes to reach his mouth. Hers opened, warm and sweet. He swept his tongue in, gently stroking hers. His hands brushed her buttocks, her hips, her shoulder blades. Where should he put them?
“Kos, I won’t break.”
With his palms hovering inches over her lower back, he went still, brooding over everything that had happened with Mason. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Maybe I’m in shock. You know what’s a good treatment? A solid pounding with one of these.” She took hold of him, squeezing him in her small, soft palm. She felt so right, he practically came in her hand. But no, he could control himself better than that—vampire erections were one of his favorite super powers.
He caught the honeyed scent of her arousal and groaned. “I’m at your beck and call.” He slid one teasing finger down her arm, across her hip, to where her legs joined, dipping inside her.
She batted his arm away. “Wait, Kos. No foreplay. Just get inside me, like the first time.”
“I thought that was just a ruse?”
“I want to remember you’re the only man to make love to me.” Her cheeks blazed, and her lips curled into a shy smile.
He picked her up and carried her to the bed, laying her down carefully.
She parted her legs for him, tempting him with glistening moisture. But, he didn’t rush. He slid into her slowly, letting her adjust. She was just as soft and warm and tight as the first time.
Words rushed out of his mouth. “I love you.”
Between her quickening breaths, she said, “I know.”
Why did that feel even better than I love you too?
He slid in her to the hilt, and bent to suckle her shoulder where it met her neck. When his fangs pierced the vein, her blood hit his mouth, tingling through him like an electric shock. Not that homey bliss of Leo’s Hunter blood. Hers was electric, was passion itself, heating him to the boiling point. Down his throat, into his belly, all the way to his limbs, every cell in his body took her in, electrified, on fire.
Krist—this was something new—
She gasped and began moving against him. Her pleasure pulsed through him, wave after wave. He’d never felt anything like it. He reached for her breasts, teasing the nipples. His tightened too. His fingers trailed to where they were joined, and he stroked her. Sparks of pleasure flew from the tip of his cock to his scalp. Low in his pelvis, new sensations built—her need inside him. She clenched around him, and he throbbed, his testicles drawing up. He thrust, she moaned, the fire built, higher and higher, his every nerve sharpened by her. What was happening to him?
In his confusion, he held himself over her and gazed on her flushed face. His fear must have shown in his eyes. She pressed her
index finger to his lips. “It’s going to be okay.”
His heart flashed with a flood of emotion—love returned, longing satisfied. Her feelings in his body—
The bond.
His orgasm came as suddenly as the realization. She rocked her hips to meet his unexpected thrusts, crying out her pleasure. Then he collapsed on top of her.
“Kos, what happened? Are you okay?”
He panted. “Bonded…”
“Oh.” Her voice rang hollow.
He rolled off her and pulled her with him. She scrambled to sit up, his softening cock still inside her. “Lena, stay with me. It’s okay.”
“Aren’t you afraid? Until I have the baby, the bond will be one sided, like with your mom and Andre.”
Kos rolled off her and took her face in both his hands. “No, sweetheart, I’m not afraid. I trust you with my forever.”
He kissed her, knowing the taste of her blood lingered in his mouth. She made a little moan in the back of her throat. “Now, I’m going to take my time with you.” He brushed his lips over the mound of her breast.
“Later.” She threw her leg over him and began to rock against his hips, building his need again impossibly fast. With her head thrown back, her body arched before him—finally, her exultation was his to see.
A completely new joy filled him, and he knew that with her at his side, he would be in for a wild ride for the rest of his immortal life.
Chapter 35
A KNOCK SOUNDED ON THE DOOR, waking Lena from the most restful sleep she could remember. Kos jerked too, and he carefully extricated himself from her arms. He rolled out of bed. Yawning, she admired his muscled backside as he stepped into a pair of pajama bottoms.
Toes tapped in the hallway loud enough for Lena to hear—Uta. Kos opened the door only a few inches, so Lena could make out the vampire’s words, but not see her.
“I am needing you in dining room. Bring Andre.”
Kos pointed his chin at her. “Lena needs to sleep.”
“If two are wanting to make baby, you are coming now.”
Lena stretched her arms overhead. “It’s okay, Kos. I’m awake, and I need to know.”
“You are bringing Andre and Zoey. We meet in dining room momentously.”
“Momentarily,” Kos corrected.
She waved away his offered word. “That what I say.”
Lena dressed quickly while Kos did the same. He pecked at her kiss-tender lips, and then darted down the hall toward the door.
Still three-quarters asleep and dazed, she pulled her hair into an elastic band as she padded down to the dining room and took a seat next to Uta, whose wagon-red fingernails tapped so fast they vibrated, rather than drummed the table.
“You are feeling all right?”
“Much better, thank you. But what about you?” Lena tilted her head to the flying fingertips. “Vampire style jitters?”
“I fine.”
Someone had wrapped a length of thick jute rope around the girth of the cracked table. The polished oak plank sagged along its new fault line, but it held. Still, Lena didn’t dare touch it. She leaned back, and the view out the window seized up her lungs. The ash-covered hills of the vineyards rolled all the way to the horizon like folds of black velvet. Skeletal vines reached for the sky. All that nearly ripe fruit, vaporized.
Andre and Zoey filed into the room, distracting Lena from the heartrending scene. They walked hand in hand, clean pressed and dressed for business. They’d clearly been expecting Uta’s summons. Andre’s stony face could have looked worse. He crossed the room and placed his palm against the window, surveying his wasted kingdom. Everyone waited, even Uta stopped her thrumming fingernails. Kos slid into the seat next to Lena and took her hand. With a slant of her head, she suggested he go to his father, but he mouthed the word, no.
Finally, Andre pivoted, scrubbed his face, and narrowed his glare at Kos. “Son, this magic Uta offers—it always has a price. Vampires are not meant to have babies. The secret is best left buried.”
“Lena has dreamed of our son.” Kos’s chest swelled, as if he held the child already. His pride delighted her, made her long for his joy as much as her own.
“Davo, Kos, this is dangerous.”
He stiffened, squeezing Lena’s hand.
Zoey swooped into the space beside Andre. “Baby, they’re adults. They need to know. Then they can decide for themselves.”
Andre forced an exhalation through clenched teeth. “Fine. Tell them, Uta. Everything.”
Lena leaned toward the vampire, so anxious for information that she forgot about the precarious table. It shifted, stretching and creaking against its bonds. With all the family tension in the room, she felt as taut as the rope. “Uta, please. I need to know.”
No answer.
A car door slammed out front.
Uta stared at some space in front of her nose. Her fair skin had gone ghost-white, her lips had all but disappeared. Her elbow was bent at an odd angle, jutting off to the side. Lena tilted to get a glimpse of the vampire’s entire arm. Holy cow. She’d dug her fingernails through her slacks and into her thigh. Blood seeped through her already ruined pants.
“Uta?”
No one paid any attention. They all stared at the door, where Bel had appeared. He held up a clear plastic vial.
Whoa. He was as pasty as Uta, sweating and breathing hard. And, oh—she glanced away from the erection tenting his pants. That impressive trait must run in the family.
Uta stared at him, her eyes dilated and glassy, her breathing shallow, her fangs out.
One Mississippi, two Mississippi—their intense eye-lock stretched out for several long and awkward seconds. Lena’s still sleepy brain tried to make sense of the weirdness passing between them. Bel. Uta. Whatever it was, it made dread creep up her legs like the stinging-cold water of an icy mountain stream.
Andre went to kneel by Bel. “Davo. Son, I’m sorry. I didn’t know this would happen, but Mila insisted, and I wanted to try for her. I have always been thankful for you—”
“Father, stop rambling.” Kos came to stand behind Lena, sounding perfectly calm. But his fingers betrayed him by digging into her shoulders.
She let him press on her tender skin—the hint of pain provided a place to focus. Because whatever was brewing between Bel and Uta probably meant Mirko could not be real after all.
Uta waved her arm at the distance between her and Bel. “This is the price.”
Bel collapsed into a chair, trembling. He took a deep breath. “I don’t understand. Price of what?”
Kos stopped squeezing her shoulder, and ran his palms over her arms more gently. “Auntie Uta was explaining to us how Lena and I could have a baby.”
His hands shook against her collarbone, and she tried to steady them by crossing her arms and covering them with her own.
For a little while, she’d had it all. But it was too good to be true. At least she had Kos—she would never let him go. She squeezed his hands tighter.
Bel pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes before he rubbed over the top of his shaggy black hair.
Zoey stood and paced a small circle in the corner of the room. “This is because of your blood, Uta?”
“Da,” she croaked, her voice ravaged by whatever was happening to her.
Like a dentist, Andre examined Bel’s mouth.
Zoey’s next question was a whisper. “Are you bonded?”
Bonded? Lena inhaled. That wasn’t so bad. It seemed like they were dying, or turning into zombies or something.
“Yes,” Uta groaned, as if she thought it was a fate worse than the apocalypse.
Zoey whistled. “Bel too?”
Bel stood, his face now crimson. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
Across the table, Uta stood too, hissing.
Booming from beside Bel, Andre shouted. “Sit down, both of you. I do not have the patience for you to act like children right now.”
Why were they so angry?
Being bonded wasn’t that bad…but they hadn’t chosen, had no free will, obviously didn’t even like each other. Her hope drained away again. Mason had tried to take away her choices. She couldn’t do that to a child.
“Start from the beginning.” Bel lowered himself back into his chair.
Kos followed suit, sitting and angling his chair toward his brother. “Lena and I want to—”
“That’s not the beginning.” Andre took the chair next to Bel. “When your mother wanted to conceive a child, she asked for Uta’s help.” Andre glanced at the female vampire and the muscles in his jaw bulged.
“What did they do?” Spittle flew from Bel’s mouth.
“Mother drank Uta’s blood. To make her eggs stronger. And then, her vampire-charged ovum was fertilized with Andre’s blood.”
“Blood?” Bel whispered. “So I have exactly half of your genes? I’m half an Andre clone?” He looked like he’d just swallowed a mouthful of spoiled milk. Poor guy. She wouldn’t like to learn she was half somebody else either, although a son that was half Kos didn’t sound so bad.
Bel leveled his gaze at Uta. “So how do we break this connection?”
Could they?
Andre whistled, the unhelpful sound of someone looking onto a trainwreck from a distance.
“We do not.” Uta crossed her arms and her legs. “To break, one of us must die.”
“I vote you,” he said. No one laughed. Bel interlaced his fingers and leaned back, resting his head in his hands. His casual pose didn’t fool Lena. And no one laughed, either.
Lena dragged her knees up to her chest, tucking her forehead into them. Kos kept his warm, dry palm against her neck, letting her know she wasn’t alone.
For a long time, silence blanketed the room. Lena looked up from her kneecaps to find Bel staring at the ceiling, inhaling so slowly he had to be pacing his breaths. What did it feel like in his skin, to see this female he’d hated his whole life only to find out she was his bonded vampire mate?
When he finally looked at Uta, his eyes were green orbs with flecks of amber blazing in them—Andre’s eyes, but his had never looked so fiery. “How long have you known?” Bel whispered.
“Since you were born.” Watery red tears had formed in Uta’s eyes but she managed not to spill them.
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