Memories of that battle in the sandstone gulley came flooding back. Many things stood out—Ian reaching out, Darren casting our shield, the pain of fire, the sudden strength when I’d been able to take control of my pain casting…
And Ian. Ian flying headfirst into that stone wall.
“So everyone else recovered?” I was suddenly anxious. Where was Ian? How was he feeling?
Does he hate me for tricking him?
Ella nodded and continued on about the feast. I wanted to ask about Ian, but I was afraid of what she might say. Even though Ian had been on the opposing side, I didn’t think she’d approve of my tricking him. It was a rotten thing to do to a friend. She probably didn’t even know.
If only Ian hadn’t been so eager to help me, so innocent.
If only Ian stabbed me in the back before I stabbed him.
PRISCILLA FOUND me later that evening, just as I was changing out of my infirmary rags and into a dress. It would be the first one I’d worn since the naming ceremony at the Academy, and the first one I could call my own. One of the perks of being an apprentice. With my new income, it’d been easy for Ella to talk me into buying it. A nice dress was something special that an apprentice could wear to indicate her new status.
I was a lowborn no longer.
“Caine told me you and the prince spent a lot of time together in that canyon.”
I bit back a groan. “What do you want, Priscilla?”
“Whatever idealistic notions you’ve got running around in that loose head of yours, the prince will never leave me for a lowborn.”
Not this again. “Priscilla—”
“My father is the wealthiest baron in the realm. Darren needs this marriage.”
I needed her to go away, but she didn’t seem to be leaving anytime soon.
“Jerar has the greatest army in the world, but if the Crown wants to keep it that way, they need my dowry. No infatuation will change that.”
“Just what exactly do you think happened between us?” I pulled the dress over my shoulders, marveling at the way the fabric moved. It was as light as air.
Priscilla just scowled at me. “Just stay away from him.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not that pitiful little girl you bullied last year. You’re never going to send me packing, so you might as well stop trying.”
Her expression was murderous. “You think you’re special because he wants to be your friend?” She laughed. “A mistress is the best you can aspire to be, Ryiah.”
I might never have a prince, but the girl who was once the Academy’s pride and joy, save Darren and Eve, was now the worst apprentice here. That counted for something, and I wasn’t beyond throwing it back in her face.
“If you’ll excuse me, I have somewhere to be.” My laugh was cold and unfeeling right back. “There’s a feast in your betrothed’s and my honor. Some of us didn’t surrender during the first ten minutes of battle.”
I walked out with the biggest grin on my face... I didn’t bother to acknowledge the twinge in my chest.
“RY!” Alex caught up to me the second I reached the infirmary’s steps. “They told me you were awake!”
“Barely. I just had an unpleasant conversation with my nemesis.”
“Priscilla?”
I made a face as the girl flounced past in an armful of skirts.
Alex snorted and held out the nook of his arm. “Well, that takes care of that. Do I have the pleasure of escorting a champion of Combat this evening?”
“Am I your second choice or your first?”
“You’re my sister. You’re always first.”
I grinned. Alex was such a liar, but I wasn’t about to call him on it. I already knew Ella was his first choice, and she’d partnered with Loren.
We were in high spirits until I noticed the couple descending the steps below us. Lynn, looking delicate and lovely, was being escorted by a certain curly-haired third-year. I could hear his laugh from yards away. Ian.
My pulse caught in my throat. I didn’t realize I’d stopped moving until Alex was waving his hand in my face.
“Ry?” My brother tilted his head. “What’s wrong?”
My smile was forced. “Nothing.”
Alex followed my line of sight with a quizzical brow. “The third-years from your faction. Do you want us to join them? It’d be nice to have some company.”
I started to protest, but my brother was already off, dragging me in his wake.
As soon she spotted me, my mentor waved us over. “Ryiah.” Lynn’s grin was cheery and sweet, everything I was not. “How are you feeling? Ella said you were in the infirmary the entire time.”
I couldn’t look at Ian. “I’m better now.”
“I’m so happy we ran into you.” She pressed close. “I wanted to let you know there are no hard feelings for what happened the other day.”
She was talking about the mentees’ attack at the beginning of our battle. We’d targeted the mages on the left, but it’d been a fair fight… What I’d done to Ian, the reason I couldn’t look at him now…
“You’ve got to do whatever is necessary to win,” she finished. “I guess I should be happy it happened to me in the beginning. Ian only just recovered last night. You and Darren gave him a hard time, didn’t you?”
I felt like vomiting, and Ian didn’t bother to comment.
Lynn looked between us, brow furrowed. “Did something happen?”
“No.” Our replies were instantaneous.
The rest of our walk to the ceremony was spent in awkward silence. Alex kept nudging me with his arm, but my lips were pressed in a hard line. I needed to apologize to Ian, but I couldn’t do it in front of the others.
That, and I had the distinct feeling my friend hated me right now. My apology would definitely have to wait.
Our arrival at the hall wasn’t any more pleasant. We’d barely made it inside when Ian made an excuse to visit a friend on the other side of the room. Lynn trailed off to find Ella, and I nearly collided with a scowling Priscilla.
Our earlier conversation was instantly remembered: “A mistress is the best you can aspire to be.”
“Ryiah.” The prince stopped me in my tracks. He looked a little worse for wear, perhaps not quite ready to leave the infirmary. His smile was crooked. “Are you ready to be the toast of the Academy?”
He probably thought he was being witty, but when I looked to the prince, all I saw was Ian’s face in that cave. I’d betrayed one of my good friends to impress a prince I could never have. Who was the biggest fool now?
I didn’t answer and Darren frowned. “Is something wrong?”
I swallowed. “What isn’t?”
“What are you—?”
I just shook my head and walked away. I was the queen of mistakes and there was no sign of losing that crown.
“TONIGHT WE CELEBRATE the incredible prowess of our mentees. This is the first time in a decade that second- and fourth-year apprentices won a mock battle. I take this as a sign of great potential to come, and I hope all of you will keep Ishir Outpost in mind after you’ve taken up your mage’s robes.” Commander Ama looked out at the crowd, beaming.
“That said, there are two apprentices who stood out. They demonstrated advanced levels of pain casting with enough control to save their squad. I would like to toast Apprentice Ryiah for her part in this victory, and Prince Darren for his excellent command. May great things come of you both.”
I acknowledged the toast with a bitter smile. My victory had come at the cost of a friendship. I wasn’t so sure it was deserved.
TEN DAYS of riding and then they showed us to our chambers.
I couldn’t stop staring.
As an apprentice, we were given all the accommodations a lowly first-year lacked: private rooms with the softest sheets, personal fires, a maid, and even an overhanging balcony with a view of the Sjeka coastline, featuring jagged cliffs and the white, foaming waters below. The bedposts were a rich cherry wood, and the co
ld marble floor was covered in charming rugs.
In each drawer of a well-made cabinet were freshly pressed cloths for drying and additional quilts for cold winter nights. There was already a small shelf with several books for study and a large chaise for lounging.
I wouldn’t have to leave my chamber to study. I wasn’t sure why the thought made me sad.
I wandered my chambers and found an interconnected alcove with a tub for bathing and a basin for my hands. My own personal bath. I practically melted on the spot.
“You ready to see Derrick?” Alex leaned against my doorway with a grin. I forgot all about a nice warm soak. “I paid a servant off to deliver our note.”
First-years weren’t supposed to associate with apprentices—not that Alex and I were going to follow that rule and wait for the solstice. Our little brother was here.
“Let’s go!”
“Keep your voice down,” he warned.
We started down the hall and froze. Sir Piers was standing there in the center of the marble, talking to Master Perry and Joan next to the stairs.
The brawny knight looked the two of us over with a nod. He wore the semblance of a smile.
“Welcome back, apprentices.”
We acknowledged his greeting with ear-to-ear grins.
“And Ryiah,” the knight’s voice carried after we had left, “I’m glad you were the sixth.”
I was happy to be back.
“WE DID NOT RETURN to the Academy for two months to listen to you romance your factionmates, Apprentice Zyr! If you can’t pay attention to your studies, then you clearly have too much time on your hands. I want you mucking the stables until we depart next month.” Master Byron’s irritated voice cut through the slow murmur of the rest of our class.
I felt a twinge of satisfaction as the fifth-year returned to his table at the corner of the room. For once, the master’s wrath wasn’t directed at me. It also gave me something to focus on other than my awkward table with Ian and Darren across from Lynn and me.
Why oh why couldn’t I have been seated next to Ella and Loren instead?
It was hard to ignore the way Ian refused to acknowledge me. Even though Darren had led the attack in the desert, the mentor-mentee relationship hadn’t changed. Probably because the prince’s actions were expected and mine were… not.
Each team was supposed to be plotting strategy for desert combat. Byron gave us a topic, and we had a half hour to discuss and present our findings in a circle around the room.
“What do you think about a flash flood casting?”
“Too risky. More complications than it’s worth.”
“Lightning?”
“Too much stamina.”
“Fissure? Fire?” I was growing impatient. Ian had gone from ignoring me to shooting down every idea I had. I wasn’t used to this side of him and it hurt. “Direct assault with weapons? Hand-to-hand combat? What?”
Lynn and Darren just sat back to watch.
“Ian,” my mentor finally interjected lightly, “why don’t you suggest something instead of criticizing all of her ideas?”
“Fine.” The third-year met my eyes across the way with a scowl. “How about turning on your comrades? Your friends will never see it coming. Mystery solved.”
I winced and hardly noticed as Darren sat up a little straighter in his chair; the prince looked from me to his mentor and back.
“She wasn’t out of line.”
“Stay out of this, Darren.” The third-year shot the prince a look. “We all know Ryiah will do whatever you say.”
“That’s not true!” My cheeks were pink.
“Really?” He leaned back in his chair. “Was that your idea back there, or was it his?”
My nails dug into my fists, and I refused to look at the prince. “If we’d fought you outright, Ian, we’d never have won.”
The third-year laughed loudly enough to disrupt the rest of our class. “You sound just like him.”
“Well, maybe I should!” My whole body was flushed. “We won, didn’t we?”
“Congratulations.” Ian’s eyes lacked all of their friendly charm. “You won. And here I thought you were that girl I met at the solstice. Fighting for hardworking lowborns all across the world instead of a backstabbing lackey.”
“That’s enough.” Darren grabbed the third-year by his collar. “I’ve heard—”
“Apprentice Ian and Your Highness, back to your seats!” Master Byron’s gaze landed on me with aggravation. “Apprentice Ryiah, I’ve no doubt you started this. Go run ten laps around the stadium.”
“But—”
“I said out!”
I swallowed. “I’m sorry, Ian.” My words were so quiet I wasn’t sure he heard them. “I wish I hadn’t—”
“Out!”
I was shutting the door and jogging down the hall, but I didn’t miss the prince’s stormy expression as I passed.
My apology to Ian was a slap to everything Darren believed. We’d fought hard and we’d done what needed to be done. For me to take it back… I didn’t let myself ponder it as I started to run.
There were no winners on that battlefield. Least of all me.
DARREN FOUND me later that evening as I was concluding my evening drills.
“Ryiah.” The prince reached down to take my wrist, but I pulled away before he could touch me. My heart began to race, slamming against my chest.
“You can’t blame yourself for using every possible advantage to get us that victory,” he said quietly.
“Not every advantage is worth it.”
“This is about him?” Darren’s jaw clenched. “You’re better than this.”
“You’re right.” My chin rose defiantly. “I’m not you. I shouldn’t have traded a friend for victory.”
“You’re Combat.” Frustration rose in his throat. “It’s not about friendship. It’s about winning.”
“So if it’d been me? You would have done the same?”
“I wouldn’t hesitate.”
His answer hurt, and that was part of the problem. I shouldn’t care that it did. And what of Ian and what I’d done to him? That look that passed before I betrayed him in that cave? “Not everyone can be as heartless as you. Power isn’t everything.”
Hurt flared in his eyes, but a second later it was replaced with arrogance and scorn. “Power is who we are, Ryiah.” Darren gave an unfeeling laugh. “If you can’t accept that, then you don’t belong in this faction, and neither does he.”
5
The next couple of weeks flew by, though they certainly weren’t without their grievances. The prince and his mentor continued to silently feud for the rest of the month. There was a budding rivalry, and somehow I’d gotten caught between it. They weren’t happy with each other, but that was nothing new.
Now they refused to so much as look at me. Ian was still disappointed and Darren was still… self-righteous and scowling whenever we passed.
Master Byron continued to take out his mounting frustration on me. For once I didn’t mind. Drilling until I was ready to collapse was a ritual that brought me peace of mind. Running laps and drilling until my palms were blistered and bruised was a comfort I could grasp. Shouting? Nothing new. All of it was better than dealing with two adolescent boys I didn’t understand.
There was also a rumor going around that the master had lost the last Candidacy, coming in third after a former lowborn named Kara.
“I heard he still harasses the Council to exclude women from mage studies because of it.” Ella nudged me over a steaming course of venison and buttered greens. We ate well as apprentices; nothing like the slop the staff served first-years. We even had a separate dining hall. “And then you strolled in like Marius’s personal exception.”
“No wonder he hates me.”
“You do seem to have a way of bringing out the worst in people.”
I snuck a look around our table before turning to her. “You didn’t just say that!”
She grinned.
“Poor, sweet Ian? Really, Ry? He won’t even talk to us anymore.”
“I apologized!”
“He’s upset because he cares.” Her gaze flit to my brother and back, but I saw it still.
“Like you and Alex?” I countered.
She tilted her head. “Well played. Seems you and your twin have something in common after all.”
My victory wasn’t as satisfying as I hoped.
Alex had been moping and hiding it for months now. Would that be me someday? I didn’t want that mock battle to destroy a friendship I’d just barely begun. Would it have been something else one day with Ian?
I refused to even think about the prince.
Later that night, I found myself lurking outside the stables waiting for Derrick to make an appearance. Apprentices didn’t have a curfew or restrictions, but that didn’t apply to first-years. Lucky for me, my younger brother was a rule breaker like his sister.
I was blowing into my hands to stifle the winter chill when he finally arrived.
Derrick shook off the snow from his cloak. “I hate this blasted school!”
“Bad day?” My heart hurt for him; every time Alex or I snuck out to see him, his progress only seemed to get worse. I’d hoped his magic would be as promising as ours, but his stamina had dropped dramatically, and he was still the worst in the class halfway into the year.
Derrick scraped the ice off his boot with the fence post. “I don’t think I’m good enough to be a mage, Ry.”
“I felt that way many—”
“I want to be a soldier.”
I paused. “Not a knight?”
“I don’t want to go through a trial like this again. If I’m not named at the end of the year…” Derrick shrugged, but his expression belied his carefree attitude. My brother cared, but he was just too proud to admit it. “At least the Cavalry has better odds.”
Gods, he was just like me. I wanted to hug him but I knew he wouldn’t appreciate that now. He’d left home for a war school; he wasn’t my little brother anymore. Younger, yes, but little, no. In another year, we’d probably be the same height. His voice had even started to change.
“If that’s what you want.” I swallowed as my mind raced for a happier subject to end with. Tomorrow night was the solstice, and then Alex and I’d be gone. This would be our last visit before his trials at the end of the year.
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