by Marie Hall
Where the hell was Julian?
Had he gone home already? But if so, how? He couldn’t call…
The second she thought it, she wanted to smack her forehead. Even if he couldn’t talk, he could text. God, when had she become such a freaking idiot? What if she’d said that in front of him too? She’d already hurt his feelings once.
“Hey.” Joey gave her a slight nudge. “You ready to go or what?” He sounded exasperated this time.
Realizing she couldn’t continue to ignore him, she sighed. “Yeah, but let me see what the boys want to do first.”
His eyes narrowed and he tapped the table with his finger. Clearly not happy that she continued to insist on including them in their night, but she wasn’t going to just leave without telling them goodbye first, either.
Getting up from the table, she walked toward Christian and tapped his elbow. “Chris!” she called over the roar of the crowd and music.
Turning to her with a happy smile on his face, he lifted his brows. “Heya, hottie. Wanna boogie?”
She snorted. “Not really, you dork. Look, I think I’m gonna go to that after party now. You guys want to come?”
He bit his lip and glanced over his shoulder at Roman, who was dancing behind a twerking redheaded female, his blue eyes full of mischief and exuberance.
“I don’t think there’s any way in hell I could drag him away from that, do you?”
Chuckling and shaking her head, she patted his arm. “Yeah, don’t think so. You guys have my cell, though, just call me when you’re ready to go home and we’ll come and—”
“We’re good.” He shook his head. “We’ll catch a ride with our boys.”
Just then a pretty blonde whom she vaguely recognized as being a junior walked up and tugged on Christian’s hand, trying to drag him toward the dance floor.
“Where’s Julian?” Elisa called as he started following the blonde onto the floor.
Miming like he was holding a phone, he yelled, “Texted Mom. Think he’s gone.”
With a sigh and shrug, she turned and walked back to Joey. “All right, I guess we can go. Jules left already and the other two are probably gonna hang out till it ends.”
Jumping to his feet, Joey fist-bumped his line backer and then hooked his arm through hers.
“Good, because I’ve been wanting you all to myself tonight.”
“You’ve had me all to yourself,” she huffed.
“Oh no.” His dark eyes gleamed under the glare of red lights. “Not really.”
Ever since elementary school, Elisa had had a serious crush on Joey Crawford. Mainly because he was cute, but she’d learned one glaring fact about the quarterback tonight: the man was as dull as a bag of rocks. If he wasn’t talking about football, or the size of his dick, he was making lewd jokes about girls.
Which, whatever, guys did that. But it sucked to learn that the guy she’d practically lusted over for most of her life was basically a giant prick. Tonight had sucked the big one.
On top of that, she hadn’t been able to stop worrying about Julian, no matter how many times she kept reminding herself that he was none of her business.
It wasn’t that she didn’t feel safe with Joey, she actually did. It was more the fact that she just flat out didn’t want to be around him any longer. If it weren’t for the fact that she wanted to see Chas, she’d have just asked him to take her home instead.
They’d go to the party, she’d hang for a little, and then she’d go home and try to forget this night had ever happened.
But when she got into the cab and he got in beside her, Joey had other ideas. Grabbing her face between his meaty palms, he slammed his lips down on hers, thrusting his tongue down her throat and making her gag. She tasted his steak dinner, the sugary punch, and the mint he’d eaten to try to mask it all.
She was going to throw up in his mouth if he didn’t take his tongue out of her throat soon. Banging on his chest with her fist finally seemed to make him realize she wasn’t kissing him back.
“Get off me,” she snarled, shoving him back and immediately wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand.
His breathing was heavy and labored. And even though it was practically pitch black in the cab of his truck, she could see the fury in his dark eyes.
“Dammit, Elisa,” he growled, “I should have known you’d be as cold as a fucking fish. Everyone told me to stay away from you. But I thought tonight—”
“What?” she snapped. “You thought you’d get laid? Get a fucking clue. That is not the way to do it. And if you’d wanted to get laid, then you should have probably paid more attention to me then your nose tackle all freaking night long.”
She glowered at him.
Turning around he gripped the steering wheel and stared straight out the window as his jaw muscles clenched over and over.
“Take me home.” She looked to her right, staring at the rows of cars. No way could she handle another hour with him. She was so over Joey Crawford.
“Get out,” he snarled.
“What?” She twisted in her seat.
“Out of my goddamn truck, now!”
“Oh God, you’re a piece of work, you know that? I don’t know what I ever saw in you.” Practically kicking the door open, she hopped out. She’d barely even gotten it closed before his rubber tires squealed off.
She slipped her jacket back up her shoulder. His manhandling had caused it to almost come off. It was ridiculous that she suddenly felt the overwhelming need to cry. He’d stopped when she’d told him to, but she couldn’t help but wonder what he’d tell everyone at school after this.
What lies would he spread about her?
As much as she hated him, Joey was the most popular guy in school, so everyone would believe whatever he told them. She squeezed her eyes shut. All she’d wanted was to have her senior year end with a bang. Who knew what the hell would happen now.
She was just reaching into her purse for her phone so that she could call her mom and ask for a ride home when a gentle hand latched on to her elbow and turned her around.
It was Julian. He was breathing heavy, glancing between her and the spot where Joey’s truck had been. His hands gripped her shoulders and he gave a gentle squeeze.
She knew immediately what he was asking.
“I’m okay,” she nodded. “I’m fine. It’s okay, Jules.”
His jaw was clenched and there was a fire in his eyes she’d never seen before. Hooking his finger at her, he turned and walked under a street lamp. She knew he wanted her to follow, probably because he wanted to talk. The minute she joined him he grabbed her hand and turned it over and placed his fingers along her palm. Her sign was still not very strong, so he spoke to her in alphabet, in the only way she knew how to understand him.
“Dick.”
Her lips twitched and she laughed. “Did you just call him a dick?”
His nostrils flared and the tears she’d felt like crying before were suddenly gone, replaced by gratitude and an overwhelming feeling of calm. Julian might not be able to tell the school what’d really happened tonight, but at least he knew the truth.
Wrapping her arms around his neck, she yanked him in for a hug. And when his arms banded around her waist and she felt the shudders roll through him, she heaved a heavy sigh of relief.
“I missed you, Jules,” she whispered, knowing he’d never hear.
~*~
The boys celebrated their sixteenth birthday just a few weeks later. Mrs. Wright had bought them an old, beat-up cream-colored Toyota Corolla. One to share between the three of them. Again, she’d been surprised to learn that even hearing impaired, Julian was legally allowed to drive.
At this point, she shouldn’t be shocked how much he could do; just because he was technically handicapped, there wasn’t much about him that was that different from the rest of the world. He couldn’t hear and he couldn’t see in color. Julian was proving to her that neither of those issues was as big of a deal as she’d
always thought they were.
Now, he rarely drove. But that mostly because neither Roman nor Christian were inclined to give up their throne. Not that she minded. Because now that they had a car, she got to ride with them, and, bonus, Julian rode in the back with her every day.
The best part of the rides for her was that he’d help her practice her signing. It was a point of pride how proficient she was becoming in such a short amount of time. With each week that passed she got better and better, to the point where she could sign phrases rather than relying only on the alphabet.
Julian was finally coming out of his shell with her. He was still quiet at school, but he also seemed to seek her out whenever he could. Walking her through the halls, sitting with her at lunch, and if it looked weird to others to see them talking in sign, no one ever really said much about it either.
Other than the fact that Chas couldn’t understand what Elisa saw in Julian, to her friend Jules was weird, distant, and broody. But that just wasn’t the case. Not with her, anyway.
Julian, she was discovering, had a whole lot going on behind his pretty face. He was an amateur artist and wanted to go to art school someday. He still hadn’t shown her any of his work, but the way his eyes would animate when he’d talk about the different styles of art made her realize just how passionate he was about it.
She’d finally gotten up the nerve to ask him about his tattoos and learned that he’d let a friend of his back in New York practice on him. Something Mrs. Wright had gotten super pissed about, apparently.
And Elisa knew that Julian was finally starting to get comfortable with her when one day he laughed.
Julian was always buttoned up, rarely letting his emotions out. It wasn’t hard to figure out why. Even as a kid he’d always been extremely private and shy. Because when a deaf person laughed, the sound was unlike what someone who could hear would make. It was a soft, snuffling kind of noise.
The moment he’d done it, his eyes had widened and he’d looked at her as if expecting her to laugh at him.
But she hadn’t.
Elisa had merely wrapped her arm around her middle and laughed right back, signing with her hands that he was too silly and the joke hilarious. Once he’d realized that he could trust being himself around her, it was almost as if they’d never even been apart. It was like being with the old Julian.
Gradually he began showing up every night for dinner, and every school morning he’d walk over to the house to pick her up for a ride.
It was like the four amigos all over again and for a while Elisa was content.
But as the days marched on and winter turned to spring and graduation happened, and then to summer and her university acceptance letter came in the mail, a sad realization began to dawn.
In just two short weeks, she’d be gone.
She’d been accepted with a full ride athletic scholarship to her father’s alma mater—Ashe College in Portland. Which was a two-hour drive from Sunny Cove. And as excited as she was about that, she couldn’t help but worry about Jules.
He was still a loner, and while it was probably none of her business, she didn’t like him being like that, either. She wanted him to make friends, to become as popular as his brothers. She never worried about those two the way she did him.
Getting up early one morning and glancing out the window, she smiled at how sunny and beautiful the day was. The sky was just beginning to turn pink, and the sea would be nice and calm and cool.
A perfect day for a long swim.
It wasn’t even eight in the morning yet, but she was sure the guys would be awake by now; they were always up in the morning causing a ruckus on their front lawn.
The idiots knew what they were doing by throwing around the pigskin and laughing and yelling right outside her window. They were trying to be as obnoxious as possible to wake her up. Not to play with her—they weren’t little kids anymore—mostly to just be douchebags and wake her up at the ass crack of dawn.
And now it would be her time to turn the tables on them.
With a chuckle under her breath, she dressed in a simple, all-black two-piece bikini, and blue jean shorts. Then jogging downstairs, she grabbed a glass of orange juice, downing it in five quick gulps before jotting off a quick note to her parents to let them know where she was going. Walking across the lawn to the Wrights’ bright yellow Cape Cod home, she whistled under her breath and knocked on the door.
Julian answered a moment later.
He was shirtless and wearing only a pair of checkered sleeping pants. For the first time she noticed that his tattoos sleeved up the entirety of his arms, but also partially covered his scrawny chest.
She snorted when he ran his fingers through his bed head, causing the feather-like tips to lift up in many different directions.
Frowning, he glanced over her shoulder and began to sign.
“What are you doing here?”
“I want to swim. It’s beautiful out. You guys need to come too.”
He curled his nose. “Nah. Too cold.”
“Jules,” she said and palmed his chest. “Stop being such a baby, it’s perfect. Go get Chris and Roman.”
Shaking his head, he gestured furiously. “Passed out upstairs. Mom doesn’t know, but they were out drinking at the Korbit barn last night.”
“Oh, jeez.” She rolled her eyes. “Those dorks.”
He gave a soft chuckle.
“Then you come.”
“I don’t know.” He wrinkled his nose.
“Please,” she said and then clasped her hands together before vocally saying, “Pretty please. I’m leaving soon. Please. Please. Please.”
Rolling his eyes, he held up a finger and turning on his heel, quickly trotted upstairs.
Fidgeting with her fingernails she peered inside the familiar door, preferring to stand on the stoop instead of going inside. When the Wrights had left after the death of Mr. Wright, rather than sell the house off, they’d locked it up. Tossing blankets over the furniture and only sending cleaners out twice a year to make sure it remained in good condition.
The Wrights, Elisa had learned in later years, were fairly wealthy thanks to oil stock Mr. Wright had bought into long before the boys were born.
Elisa still couldn’t walk into the house without getting a lump in her throat at how familiar everything was inside. From the wooden coffee and dining room tables, to the navy colored overstuffed couch and loveseat Mr. Wright used to favor.
Mrs. Wright had more of a country flare to her decorating, thanks to Mr. Wright. She’d actually been born and raised in New York, but Mr. Wright had been a country boy from Tennessee and she’d adopted his style; she didn’t decorate like most coastal locals did with pale blues and sea-foam greens and brilliant whites. It was woodsy and more Americana.
Julian returned less than a minute later wearing gray swim trunks and a white tank top. The black swirls of his tattoos looked so striking against the plain shirt and for just a second her heart thumped in her chest.
Snatching the car key off the hook hanging just inside the door, she jingled it in his face.
“I’m going to make you pay for this,” he signed to her after he closed the front door and pocketed the house key.
Grinning from ear to ear, she tossed him his key. “No, you’re not. You like me too much for that.”
For a brief moment she saw something that looked like a flicker of heat glimmer through the depths of his sea-green eyes. And it was like a deer being caught in the headlights of an approaching vehicle. Her hands were shaking when he finally turned away.
What the eff was that? She hadn’t had another one of those weird Julian moments since the night of the homecoming dance. She’d thought whatever that’d been had passed, but apparently not.
She shook her head, hating how jittery she still felt.
Then he was starting the car and she got in beside him and for the first time Elisa wondered what she’d been thinking when she’d invited just him along.
>
But her worries vanished the moment they got to her favorite swimming spot. It was an abandoned quarry tucked away in the woods that had a rickety old pier jutting out toward calm waters.
Julian impressed her. He wasn’t as strong as she was, but he was good. Threading the water seamlessly with sure strokes. They swam back and forth along for a few hours. Laughing and splashing, until finally exhaustion made them both climb out. They laid out on a floating dock shaded by the large branch of an old oak tree.
The water had been frigid when they’d first jumped in, but now the day was getting warmer, and it was nice to close her eyes and sway up and down on the gentle tide as she inhaled the briny breeze.
Julian grabbed her hand and began to talk. “Do you remember the fireworks on the beach?”
She leaned up on her elbow, glancing down at him. His wet hair was plastered to his forehead and his breathing was smooth and even. Skinny as he was, Elisa could see that in a few more years Julian would be chiseled, and with his striking cheekbones and full lips there was a modelesque quality to his looks.
She frowned, uncomfortable with where her thoughts kept straying.
She’d just turned nineteen in May. This was really the very last thing she needed to be thinking about.
He shook his head and jerked his chin, indicating that he wanted her to lie back down. Nodding, she scooted over a little, needing to get some space between them. But he wouldn’t release her hand. It was the only way they could talk without looking at each other.
Ignoring the strange dips and rolls of her stomach, she closed her eyes. She was just nervous. Less and less, Julian, or even Roman and Christian for that matter, looked like the boys of her dreams. They were becoming men before her eyes and it was weird for her.
“Do you remember?” he asked again.
“Yes. Why?”
“Because we did this then, too.”
She smiled. “Did what?”
“We sat on the beach and we held hands and watched the fireworks.”
A huge grin cut a swath across her face. “I can’t believe you remember that.”
“I remember a lot of things, Smile Girl.”
It was the name he used for her. In sign there wasn’t always an exact way to replicate a name, so sometimes a name would become words that were associated with a person. Julian had told her that anytime he saw her she was smiling. Hence, she’d become Smile Girl.