I grabbed clean clothes and turned the shower as hot as it would go. I stood under it until the water cooled and goose bumps covered my body. I couldn’t hide up here all day. Besides, it’s not like Edge was going to tell everyone about what happened last night.
I could hear Jessa and Rainy in the kitchen. It reminded me of old times. They were bantering back and forth, bringing happy memories to mind. Memories of when things were simpler, calmer, before Lorenzo, before the book.
When I stepped into the kitchen, they both got quiet and stared at me, like they were waiting to see what I would do.
“Good morning,” I said, looking at them like they were crazy, “What’s up with you two?”
“Us? You aren’t serious, right?” Jessa asked. Her hand was on her hip and her shoulder was kicked back. A defensive pose I remembered all too well. But why?
“What? Of course, I’m talking about you two. Am I missing something here?” I asked.
Jessa and Rainy turned to look at each other, confusion dancing between them. Were they going to explain what was going on, or was I going to have to pull it out of them little by little?
“You tell me, slugger.” Jessa sauntered past me and pulled a coffee cup from the cupboard. Rainy just stared at me, biting her lip, like she wanted to say something but just wasn’t sure how.
“Spill it, Rainy,” I said, pulling out a chair at the table and falling into it.
“Don’t you talk to her like that, Jade,” Jessa snapped at me.
“How am I supposed to talk to her? Just what is the problem here?” I asked, trying to keep my voice level.
Julie burst into the room and got in my face. “You bitch! Look what you’ve done!” She pointed her finger at her swollen eye. It was purple and split at the corner. “I at least slapped you, sure it would have hurt for a little bit but you…you blackened my fucking eye!”
My cheek tingled as I remembered Julie’s hand cracking across my skin. I knew with out any doubt that I did not strike her back after she hit me. But her eye, purple and swollen, was a proof enough that I had indeed taken a swing at her. One more thing I would be apologizing for and didn’t know why.
I got up from my chair and gestured for her to sit. She glared at me in refusal. I found the drawer that contained some sandwich bags and filled it with ice and wrapped it in a soft, thin dish towel.
“I’m sorry,” I said, handing it to her. She snatched it out of my hands and gingerly placed it against her swollen eye, wincing when it made contact.
“If you’re really sorry, then find me a big thick steak to put on this. In case you didn’t know, ice hurts!”
Jessa and Rainy were upset with me. Julie looked like she was planning on how to get me back for decking her, and Edge…Edge was probably looking for a way to stay far away from me. How many others were involved when the book took over my body?
I cleared my throat to get past the huge lump sitting between me and what I needed to say. “I’m really sorry…for everything. I know I owe you all an explanation and I will give you one. But first, can you please tell me if I hurt anyone else?” I asked.
“You dotted this ones eye,” Jessa said pointing at Julie. “And then you pretty much told everyone off, before you fell to your knees and started sobbing about how sorry you were,” Jessa explained, “then little miss mother hen here,” she pointed to Rainy, “helped you to your feet and Edge picked you up and carried you to your room.”
I knew what happened after that. Me, Edge and the book. Apologies were going to have to be said to everyone for the outburst that came from my mouth but not from me. I looked each of them in the eye before I started my story. I wanted them to see the truth I was about to speak. They needed to know just how dangerous this could get, especially if the woman in the book could step in at any time and do as she pleased.
I told them everything I could up to the part where I ended up in bed with Edge. I didn’t know how to explain that the words on my arms were partially translated because of what had transgressed between him and me, so I left that part out. I’d need to speak to Edge about keeping that part of it to ourselves. Besides, until the spell was complete, I was in the dark as much as they were. No-one could really know what it might mean for us all.
For now, the woman in the book had stayed quiet and so had the book. It made me wonder if she’d drained herself when she stepped forward and took control of my body. Whatever the reason, I was grateful. It gave me a chance to speak freely and explain what was going on inside me.
Julie dropped the ice on the table and grabbed my hands. “I’m sorry that I lashed out at you. But you have to understand, when you disappeared, Edge was a madman. Everyone was scrambling around trying to figure out how we could get you back. Even Jude was blocked from entering the Nomad compound. We sat here completely useless, so when you stepped through the door, I just reacted. I was so angry that you’d put yourself in that kind of danger, without having some sort of backup. Do you know what Jude went through, knowing you’d submitted yourself to them?”
I didn’t know. I was just trying to do the right thing and the right thing was saving Jude. Edge would have blamed himself if Jude was killed because he’d found the book for Edge. I didn’t want anyone else to die because of me. I wasn’t going to be sorry for doing what I thought was right. I was, however, sorry for what I had put everyone through because of it.
“I won’t apologize for keeping Jude from the Nomads, but I’m sorry for making you all worry. I’m also really sorry that I can’t control what’s inside of me. Please know that I can’t keep her from shoving me out of my own head. I just have to figure out what she wants and then we’ll all be safe again, or, well, safer than we were before I absorbed this damn book.”
“We’ll just have to keep a closer eye on you and come up with a way to tell if it’s you or her we’re dealing with,” Jessa said.
“We should come up with a safe word. Something she won’t guess,” Rainy chimed in.
“She listens to Jade’s thoughts. She’ll know it as soon as we decide on one,” Jessa corrected.
“I think we’re safe right now. I don’t know how long it’s going to be before the book comes back to life. I think it took a lot of energy for her to do what she did and she’s recharging her batteries, so to speak. I can’t guarantee that she won’t pick through my thoughts later and figure it out,” I explained.
By the time Dagger found us, we were chatting away like I hadn’t flipped out last night and made a complete ass of myself. He looked at all of us like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to join in on our conversation or dart out of the room. I chuckled at his confusion.
“I’m going to go find Edge. Can you guys fill Dagger in on everything?” I asked. They waved me away with the reassurance that they’d tell him just how crazy I really was. I tried to offer an apology to Dagger, but he just waved it off. He wasn’t upset with my outburst. Maybe it was just a guy thing and it took more to rile him up.
I checked the security room, but Edge wasn’t there. Instead, I found Jude and Micah catching up on the Nomads Council issues.
“I’m looking for Edge, but I’m glad I caught you both. I owe you an apology Jude, and an explanation,” I said, trying to meet his eyes, but found myself staring at the floor.
“What you did was stupid,” he replied. Where was the Jude that cracked jokes? He sounded pretty angry and he had the right to be. After all, I’d shoved him to the floor after he’d been beaten pretty badly. I’d also left him to deal with a very unhappy group of people to answer to.
“I’m sorry, Jude, but there was no way I was going to let you die for me,” I said.
“I’m thinking…and correct me if I’m wrong, but you’ve totally earned the title She-Rah.” He let out a hoot of laughter. Now that’s what I wanted to hear. Jude was upset with me, but wasn’t going to hold it against me.
“What ever you say, Robin,” I said, tossing him a smug grin as I left him and Micah to continue
searching for Edge.
I found him walking along the shore. His jeans were rolled up so the water could lap over his feet. I let myself take in the sight of him as I replayed the conversation I’d just had with Jessa, Rainy and Julie. We’d finally managed to come up with a question that they would ask me if they thought I was not myself. I shuddered, thinking back on what it would be. If they thought I was acting all weird again, they would ask me if I was hungry and did I want Eggplant Parmesan. I absolutely can not even think about that dish without wanting to lose my lunch. It probably stemmed from when Jessa had made it and gave us all food poisoning.
They wouldn’t even have to wait for my answer because I would visibly shudder at the thought of it. Rainy had done a good job at coming up with something so repulsive to me that they would be able tell right away if she had taken over again.
I jogged down to the shoreline and fell into step with Edge. My hand reached for his and he slipped his fingers between mine. I couldn’t help the feeling of relief that flooded through my body.
“I’d like to keep working on using my magic,” I said as we stopped to let the water wash over our feet.
“Do you think that’s a good idea?” he asked.
“I think it will help. It might even keep her from taking over again.” I tipped my face to the sun, absorbing its warmth.
“It’s possible, and right now I want to do anything I can to help you.” Edge released my fingers and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. I leaned in, enjoying the connection. A huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders when he didn’t turn away from me. Maybe it was a preordained thing, but then again it could just be an Edge thing. Either way, I’d take it.
One thing was for certain and the woman in the book had made it all too clear. The partially translated spell on my arm needed to be completed. I could only hope that she would leave me alone long enough to take the time I needed to get to know Edge a little better.
It all circled around time. How long would we have before Lorenzo found out I had the book? How long would the psychotic woman in my head leave me alone? How long…how long? The words chased themselves around in my head on a never ending loop. One question over and over again, creating my own little slice of madness.
If Lorenzo was still attacking the Covens, then there wouldn’t be anyone left. And if the spell had something to do with the book being unbound, would that mean it would go back to its original form? Could that mean the woman who berated me at every turn would be silenced? I had no answers, none that would tell me what made the book so important.
I fit into this somehow, as did my parents. They died because of it, so it had to be something worth the cost of so many lives. My mother had bound my powers and hid me. She’d died at the hands of the Triad, just as the woman in the books family had. I kept plucking away at the memories. Eventually something had to stand out in the jumbled mess of information I was given.
And what was the deal between Dagger and Edge?
“How do you and Dagger know each other?” I asked.
Edge pulled me over to sit on the sand, away from the waters reach. He draped his arms over his knees and looked out over the water.
“We were, at one time, best friends,” Edge said, picking up a shell and tossing it into the waves.
“You were? What happened?”
Edge snorted. Pausing for a second, he picked up another shell and held it out to inspect it like it would help him gather his thoughts.
“My father died when I was six. My mother tried the best she could after he was gone. Most days, she was hardly home and I was left alone. Dagger’s dad stepped in and helped raise me. I was there more than I was home. Well, up until I hit my teenage years. We were inseparable, Dagger and I, back then anyway.”
“When I turned sixteen, everything changed. I was able to work and ease my mother’s burden. So I started doing odd jobs and ended up getting myself tied up with the Triad.”
“Tied up with the Triad how?” I asked.
“I’d found an easy way to make money, good money. At the time, I didn’t realize that I was working for the Triad. I was approached by a man one day when I was working at a fishery. He needed someone who not only was strong, but quick and street smart. I guess I fit the description. He offered me a lot of money to help find things that he claimed were stolen from his boss. I tried to blow him off, even told him that he needed to go to the police. He stuffed a bunch of cash in my hands. More than I’d make in a year at the fishery, with a promise of more to come, if I found his bosses prize possessions. I realized later that it was just a test. The real job came after I was in it so deep, that I couldn’t get out.”
“It changed me. I thought I was a real badass. I saw less and less of Dagger. He confronted me one day. He demanded to know what was going on. But I was so deep into the Triad at that point, I couldn’t tell him. I knew he’d turn his back on me if he knew the truth.”
“He followed me one day and found out what I was up to. He was so pissed at me. I left the Coven that day and started out on my own. I worked for the Triad for a few years, until I realized what they were really up to. I overheard a conversation that made me run back to the safety of my Coven, back to my mother. For months, I looked over my shoulder. Waiting, just waiting. I should have never gone back.”
“The Triad found me. Lorenzo and a handful of his Enforcers showed up on my doorstep one day, and hauled me out of the house and drug me through the yard by my feet. To this day, I don’t know what they had planned for me because of my mother’s interference.”
“She threw herself at Lorenzo, begging for him to leave me alone. Something happened, it just clicked, and the next thing I knew, I was being stood up on my feet and Lorenzo was taking my mother away.”
“Dagger was furious. He vowed that day to never speak to me again, called me a traitor. Matheson, he just stared at me in disappointment. I did the only thing I could do. I walked away from my Coven and spent a year wandering from place to place, looking for the one thing I thought he would want in exchange for my mother.”
I couldn’t help the sadness that crept over me. The Triad had stolen Edge’s innocence by force and he felt cut off from his Coven because of it. He had to live with all the wrong choices he’d made for the right reasons.
“By the time I gave up on finding the book, it was too late and Lorenzo…they were preordained. Not only did I betray my Coven, but I lost my mother to that monster in the process. Up until two years ago, she protected my life with hers. She made him promise not to lay a hand on me, and in return, she would be his wife.”
Now I knew all of Edge’s secrets, I realized why he’d been so standoffish when we’d first arrived. He really hadn’t had anyone he could trust. He’d lost his best friend and his mother all in the same day. He still harbored so much guilt because of it. The pain of the loss was clearly etched along his brow as he fought his inner demons. The book inside me had caused so much damage and I couldn’t wait to be free of it, to destroy it like it had destroyed so many others. There wasn’t one person I knew of that the book hadn’t affected, and that was while it was still bound. What would happen if it were released? I shuddered at the thought. I couldn’t let that happen.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
For three days, Edge and I spent our time down by the water. When he wasn’t helping me with my magic, we were talking, learning about each other, and trusting each other. And with every day that passed, I was falling a little more for him. He was like the other half of me, which made me wonder if it was based off of a mutual feeling or because we were preordained. And how did one really know that they were preordained?
I asked him about it one day while we sat side by side on the warm sand. We’d been practicing for hours with no real improvement on my part. It was very frustrating to know that somewhere locked deep inside me was a magic I could not touch.
Edge nudged my shoulder. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I said with a quick grin, �
��I was just thinking…well more like wondering about something.”
“What would that something be?”
“You said you think we’re preordained, but how do you know if that’s in fact what we are?”
Edge pulled me onto his lap. “Close your eyes,” he said. “Now pay close attention,” he said, capturing my lips.
The swirling sensation grew, like it always did as I was warmed by the euphoria that always came with being this close to Edge. It was intense, yet comforting. It made me want to do whatever he asked because he asked me, without question. It consumed me.
Edge pulled back slowly and I opened my eyes. “That feeling, the one that takes over all reason and tugs at all your senses…that’s what tells us we’re meant to be together, that we’re preordained. That feeling will never go away. There will never be anyone else for me but you.”
I melted. He was right. There was no other for me either. When I finally realized what that meant for us, I wasn’t so scared anymore. I could relax in the knowing that he was as affected by this as I was. With that knowledge, came the understanding that the spell would be completed soon. There was nothing we could do to stop it, short of moving to opposite sides of the planet. Even that wouldn’t keep us apart. We would always find each other. Besides, the book wouldn’t allow us to be apart. I had to get it bound, but we had to complete the spell first.
“How do you think she can take control like that? I mean, she’s bound in a book, she shouldn’t be able to interact with me right?” I asked.
“I don’t think the Originals that bound her, thought she was strong enough to counter the spell.”
“You think she spelled their spell?” It made sense. If they bound her because of her madness, and her madness was because of losing all that she loved, that would mean her counter spell would hinge on the one thing that drove her over the edge. Love.
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