by S A Monk
“He feels like this is all his fault. Wants to fix it by himself.”
“His fault? That’s crazy.”
Eli shrugged. “Brad has always been his problem— his thorn in the side.”
She didn’t understand. She shook her head. “Well, partners help each other out, not leave one another to resolve trouble by themselves.”
Eli shrugged. “I expect he wants you to be proud of him, not bailin’ him out.”
Jenny tried hard to understand Hawk’s reasoning over the next few days. He was a proud man, but there were times in anyone’s life when, despite their best efforts, they needed help; when problems got too big to tackle alone.
That bit of wisdom felt sadly ironic to her. She’d spent years alone after being separated from her father; years when there had been no one to help her deal with her feelings of anger, loneliness, and vulnerability.
Hawk had come close to despair last night. She’d been there, too, once long ago and even more recently after her father’s death. She was surviving and coping because of Hawk. She wasn’t going to let this new setback destroy him.
The cattle buyer showed up the following day. The stock they were selling had been sorted into holding pens next to the scales. Eli and Steve handled moving the animals through the pens and chutes, onto the scales, while Jenny and Hank recorded and logged their weight beside the buyer.
It took all day to get the three hundred and forty head of cattle weighed. The tabulation at the end was a good one. They got a little more than expected. The buyer was more than fair, giving them a good price per pound for their beef. The cattle they’d sold had put on some weight over the summer. All in all, Jenny and Hank and Eli were pleased. Steve sat on the fence watching and listening, his handsome face expressionless.
Jenny looked over at him and wondered what he was thinking as he observed their happy high-fives. Maybe he felt left out. Hank and Eli had been with the ranch a long time. They were like family. Steve had never really fit in that way. He didn’t seem to want to fit in that way.
But Hawk was the one who really should have been here with them celebrating a good sale. He was on another of his hunting trips. Market day was the culmination of a year’s worth of hard work on a ranch. It was what everyone worked towards. Their big once-a-year payday. If not for all the damages and setbacks this year, the sale would have been more than enough to cover expenses for another year. As it was, sadly, it wouldn’t be enough to keep the wolf from the door, so to speak.
That didn’t dampen Jenny’s high spirits, though, so after accepting the check the buyer handed her, she made arrangements with him to begin the shipping process the next day, then invited everyone up to the house for a drink. All, except Steve, accepted.
It would feel good to give Hawk some positive news when he got home. He’d only been gone two days. He had two more to go, and she missed him like crazy. In bed, warm and comfortable, she thought about him sleeping at the chilly line cabin and tromping through the mountains. She imagined him sitting with his corporate clients at night, not having much in common to talk about, except deer hunting.
He was probably worrying about how he was going to fix things; how he was going to replace a burned out barn. The first snowfall could arrive any day. Where would he put his horses, his sick animals, his feed and tack? They could probably clear out the old barn, but what condition would all the farm equipment be in next spring?
For the hundredth time, she wondered what Hawk would say if she fixed things? How angry could he get? He was backed up against a wall. She had to approach him one more time about letting her help financially.
Another investigator from the fire department returned on Friday. He gathered ashes and debris and, of course, the burned gasoline can. When he was finished, he removed the yellow crime scene tape and left, promising to get back to her as soon as he had any further information. Jenny had no idea how fingerprints would survive such an inferno and therefore didn’t hold much hope in actually getting lucky enough to get a name attached to their arsonist. But she supposed anything was possible, even an occasional miracle.
Not long after the investigator left, Brad Caldwell called. She was sure he had to have known Hawk wasn’t home. He never would have risked talking to him. He told her he’d heard about their fire, and wanted to personally tell her how sorry he was. Jenny was waiting for him to ask if he could do anything to help because she had an answer for him, but he never asked. He wanted to meet with her, but she doubted he’d reveal anything too incriminating, and Hawk would be furious if he found out, so she decided against it. It wasn’t worth the risk. She didn’t need Brad to help her solve their problems.
He wasn’t happy with her refusal. By the time their conversation ended, she could almost feel his fury over being thwarted.
CHAPTER 20
Despite all the ups and down of the past week, Jenny stood on the front porch, brimming with excitement as she watched the truck and horse trailer rattle down the gravel road toward the house. Her horse was arriving from California.
The young wrangler who transported Dark Shadow pulled up in the middle of the yard and stepped out of his truck. He looked barely out of his teens. He also looked tired and grumpy. Jenny walked across the lawn, through the gate, and across the dirt to greet him.
She frowned as she got closer to the the horse trailer. It was old and small. Inside, her horse was neighing and shifting his big body around. Jenny couldn’t believe the stable where she boarded her horse would allow the animal to travel so far in such an uncomfortable, cramped space. She’d paid them good money to ship her horse. The more she listened to Dark Shadow, the angrier she became.
“How long has he been this upset? And why wasn’t he given a better trailer? This one’s too small!”
The young cowboy pushed his hat back off his forehead and sighed as he stopped in front of her. “There wasn’t any other rig available. Your horse isn’t a very good traveler, ma’am. He didn’t like all those winding mountain passes. It was a long drive.”
Jenny stared at him rigidly, trying to control her temper.
The young man eyed her and shrugged. “We drove straight through. Haven’t you ever had him in a horse trailer before?”
“You didn’t stop to give my horse a break?”
“We don’t usually, and he’s been too skittish.”
“Geez, I don’t believe this!”
She spun away from him and moved toward the rear of the horse trailer. As she passed the side window slats, she reached in to stroke and soothe her distraught animal. Her voice calmed him a bit.
“Easy, fella. Easy, does it.” She continued talking to him as she opened the rear doors of the trailer.
The young man helped her put the ramp down. “You don’t have a wrangler?”
“Aren’t you one?” she shot back.
Together they managed to get her horse out of the tiny trailer and into the yard.
The big black gelding was calm while Jenny stroked and petted him, all the while holding onto his halter, but he was trembling and exhausted from the long confining ride. He was also uneasy in his new surroundings, even though he recognized his owner and her voice. She might have gotten him safely to the corral nearby, if the young cowboy hadn’t moved so suddenly behind the gelding. Dark Shadow reared and whinnied, startled by the man who should have known better than to come up from behind like he had.
Beginning to dislike him as much as her horse did, Jenny grabbed for the leading rope she had clipped onto Dark Shadow’s halter. With a hard tug, she attempted to get her horse under control again. Unfortunately, she didn’t have the strength, and the inexperienced cowboy was no help at all. His presence only seemed to agitate Dark Shadow further. She was getting desperate by the time Steve Walker rushed over to help out. He grabbed for the rope. Beset with yet another stranger, Dark Shadow swung and pranced sideways, and Jenny jumped out of the way.
“Whoa, boy, whoa,” she cajoled, replacing Steve’s ha
rsher voiced entreaty. The younger wrangler tried again to help, but Jenny motioned him away. Finally, she and Steve managed to bring Dark Shadow under control somewhat, so she took the reins from Steve and lead the gelding to the corral.
She was opening the gate when her horse suddenly shrieked and reared. Spooked by something or someone, the horse fought the bit, yanked the leading rope from her hand, and trapped her against the wooden gate.
With the wind knocked out of her, Jenny was pinned and trapped. From her side, she caught sight of a truck skidding to a sudden halt near the corral. She tried to wiggle free just as Dark Shadow reared again. Someone shouted and cursed. It sounded like Hawk’s voice.
Her poor horse was so distraught and frightened by that point, he was simply locked in place. Jenny began to fear she might be crushed at any second. How could that stupid wrangler have let him get into such an agitated state!
For the third time, Dark Shadow screamed and reared on his hind legs, hooves pumping. Jenny finally managed to lunge out of the way. She took a step into the corral and was clipped in the back of her shoulder with a hoof. It was a glancing blow, but it drove her to the dirt onto her hands and knees. Instinctively, she brought her arms up over her head to protect herself.
Miraculously, the horse didn’t strike her again. Scurrying out of the way on her hands and knees, she reached the fence and pulled her legs tight up against her chest, locking her arms around them, beginning to feel shaken. Her shoulder was bleeding, throbbing, and she suddenly felt light-headed. Black spots appeared before her eyes, and she gulped a few deep breaths to stem the nausea that hit her stomach all at once, which she quickly attributed to not eating.
She watched Hawk run up to her wildly prancing horse, shoving Steve and the young cowboy, out of the way. He had a furious expression on his dark face, and yet when he grabbed Dark Shadows’ leading rope, he spoke to her horse without a hint of that anger. Finally, he brought the animal under firm control.
Jenny sighed with relief and tried to regain her equilibrium. This was not her horse’s fault. He’d been treated badly, and was undoubtedly frightened and tired. As soon Hawk put her horse into the corral adjoining the one she was sitting in, he rushed over to where she was still slumped against the fence, on the ground. After sinking into a squat, he ran his hands gently over her face and arms, turning her carefully to check her injured shoulder.
“Christ, honey, you look ready to pass out!”
With his help, Jenny pulled herself to her feet, using the wooden rails for support. “Help me to the other side,” she responded. “Let me see if my horse is all right.”
“You need to come inside.”
“Just let me see if Dark Shadow is okay.”
Hawk put an arm around her waist and assisted her the short distance to the far side of the corral. Her horse immediately came up to the fence that separated the two corrals. She put her hand through the slats and rubbed its nose. “Poor baby,” she cooed. “I’m sorry this has been so stressful for you. You’ll like it here, though. I promise.”
Steve came up to her. “Are you okay, Jenny?”
She turned to him, but swayed dizzily, then staggered when she tried to step away from the fence. The ground rushed toward her fast. In the next instant, she found herself scooped up in Hawk’s arms. Her head rolled back against his shoulder, and her eyes drifted shut, but she heard him speak angrily to Steve.
“I saw you slap that horse as it went through the gate. That was fucking stupid, damn it! Jenny wasn’t out of the way, and she didn’t have the strength to control that animal in the condition it was in.” Hawk stood squarely in front of his ranch hand, his legs braced wide. “Get your gear and get off the ranch, Walker. You’re fired! And you damn well better hope she’s not hurt too bad, or I’m going to come looking for you and rearrange that pretty face of yours.” When he reached the young man near the truck and trailer, he came to another stop. “You better get the hell out of here, too! Get another job, kid. You’re no good at this one!”
Jenny heard the barely restrained fury in Hawk’s words, but they sounded as if they were coming from far away. And she still felt too dizzy to open her eyes and focus.
“You think you’re such a big man, Larson,” she thought she heard Steve call out behind them. “Well, fuck you!”
Hawk raised his middle finger, but otherwise made no response as he carried her into the house and up the stairs.
In her bedroom, he laid her down carefully on the bed, adjusting the pillows behind her back and head. He was removing her blouse to look at her shoulder when Eli and Hank came into the room. Hank stepped back when he saw Hawk lift her arms out of her shirt sleeves.
“Give the doctor a call, will you, Hank?” he asked his ranch hand over his shoulder. “Tell him I don’t want to move her, and that she got struck by a horse. She’s got a wound on her shoulder and could have some bruised ribs.”
Eli came up beside him. “Here’s some antiseptic to clean that cut.” The old cowboy handed the younger one some cotton and a bottle of peroxide. “How bad did she get hurt?”
“Dark Shadow didn’t mean to strike me. He tried to avoid hitting me with his hooves. He just grazed me. That young wrangler drove straight through with him. He didn’t even stop to break him.” She tried to rise, but everything began spinning. Hawk pressed her gently back down. “I’m all right— just a little woozy. It wasn’t Dark Shadow’s fault,” she repeated. “He’s a good horse. He is. He wouldn’t hurt me. He was just scared.”
“Shhh,” Hawk murmured. “It wasn’t your horses’ fault. Steve made a stupid move when he tried to get him through the gate to the corral. Don’t worry about Dark Shadow. We’ll look after him and take good care of him. Right now, let us look after you. I called the doctor. When he calls back, I think he’ll probably want you to go the hospital for some x-rays. I want to make sure your ribs are okay. You got pushed up against the fence pretty hard. Does it hurt there?” His hand tenderly probed the area below her breasts.
“Just a little tender. I managed to avoid Dark Shadow’s full weight.”
“Thank God for that.” He stroked the hair off her forehead and rested his large warm hand against her cheek.
She gave him the best smile she could manage. “I missed you. I’m glad you’re home. No problems? No one took a shot at you?”
He chuckled. “No problems. I’m fine.”
Eli came over with a cool wet wash rag for her forehead and some more cotton to clean her shoulder with. “That’s good. She’s talking and making sense. Don’t let her go to sleep.”
She heard them talking to each other, but it sounded faint and distant. She felt sleepy, but Hawk wouldn’t let her close her eyes or drift off. After the doctor called, they drove into town for an exam and an x-ray. No broken ribs or major injuries. No stitches were needed, and she only had a minor concussion. The back of her head had apparently hit the gate, but there was only a small lump there. On the way home, Hawk let her sleep.
She didn’t wake until hours later. Hawk must have put her to bed. The room was dimly lit when she woke up, and she could see it was dark outside her bedroom window. She was dressed in her pajamas, beneath the covers. Her shoulder throbbed. She touched the bandage and scooted up against the pillows. At least her head felt clearer.
She looked around and found Hawk slouched down in the armchair on the far side of the bed. His long legs were stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles. His arms were crossed over his chest, and his head had fallen forward, onto his chest. He was sound asleep, snoring lightly. He looked exhausted. That chair couldn’t be too comfortable, but she didn’t have the heart to wake him.
A few moments later, Eli came quietly into the room. He carried a tray with some soup and crackers and a cup of tea on it. He set it on the night stand beside the bed.
“How you feeling, darlin’?” he asked as he sat on the edge of the bed.
Jenny took his gnarled old hand and squeezed it. “I’m
okay. The nap helped. My shoulder throbs a little, but I feel much better.”
“Take a couple ibuprofen,” he said, handing her two. “It’ll help the pain.” He handed her a glass of water and watched her swallow the pills. “See if you can eat a little.” He traded her the soup for the water.
“What are we going to do about him?” she asked, indicating Hawk with a nod of her head. “We can’t let him sleep there all night. He’ll have a kink in his neck in the morning.”
“Well, sweetie, you could marry him and put him out of his misery,” Eli chuckled softly. “Might as well since he can’t seem to leave your room anyway.”
Jenny raised an eyebrow. “Marriage is a bit premature.”
“Not the way I see it, missy.”
She understood what he meant— that he knew they’d been sleeping together, but she didn’t comment. “Has he eaten?”
“Yeah, I brought him up something a while back.”
“He’s been here the whole time?”
“Hasn’t left your side,” Eli confirmed. “I think you scared him to death when he drove up and saw you trapped against that gate. Steve’s lucky Hawk had his arms full with you, or he woulda been seein’ the Doc himself.”
“Hawk fired him?” Jenny thought she recalled him doing that, though she didn’t think it had been the wrangler’s fault.
“He had it comin’. Nobody liked him much. Hawk wanted to get rid of him a long time ago. He’ll probably just go back to his real boss anyway.” She gave Eli an uncomprehending look. “Brad Caldwell. We all think Steve was Brad’s boy— his plant,” he went on to explain. “‘Course nobody can ever prove nuthin’ around here.” Eli took the empty cup of soup from her and handed her the tea. “It’s that herbal stuff you like— chamo…chamo something.”
“You’re such a sweetie, Eli.” Jenny leaned over and kissed his whiskered cheek.
“Gotta take care of my girl, now don’t I?”
She patted his cheek and finished her tea, appreciating the fact that he’d laced it with honey. When she was finished, he told her to get some rest, picked up the tray with the empty dishes on it and left, turning out the light behind him.