“You?”
Her smile seemed to freeze. “I had a little more unconventional upbringing. I lost my father early, my stepfather and stepbrother were, to put it nicely, bullies without souls and my failed engagement…well, let’s just say that I have major trust issues and I won’t ever be a bride. I don’t want to be. So, I guess you were right, after all. I do steer clear of men.”
“Except for Toby.”
“He’s a baby.”
“He won’t always be a baby.”
“I know.” She sounded sad.
“You don’t want him to grow up?”
“Of course I do. I just—I won’t…he’s yours, Dillon. Not mine.”
She wouldn’t see him grow up.
“I’m sorry about that.” And he was. Genuinely. She cared about Toby, and already Dillon was inclined to think favorably of anyone who liked his child.
“It’s not your fault,” she told him. “You’ll take him away when you go, and if I were in your shoes…if he were mine, nothing would stop me from taking him home and claiming him. You shouldn’t even think about apologizing for that, just as I’m not going to apologize about the fact that I’ll miss him when he’s gone.”
“Good. I prefer honesty.” He’d had too little of that with Lisa. Or maybe he’d been the one lying, thinking they were a match when they were no more suited than he and Colleen Applegate were.
She nodded. “Well then, the honest truth is that this bed is probably not almost comfortable as I implied earlier. Looking at it now, I’d say you’re going to have a very restless night.”
He shrugged. His comfort was the least of his worries these days. “I assume you’ll want to lock the door, but will you call me if you need me in the night?”
For a second those dark eyes looked startled and sensually aware. That wouldn’t do. Not when he was already too aware of her as a woman. His concentration from here on out had to be on Toby. Unlike his parents, he would put his child first. He would actually care. His choices would be made carefully, logically. No whisking women in and out of his life. No risking Toby getting attached to someone who was temporary. In fact, no more risking making the kind of mistakes he’d made with Lisa. Besides, Colleen definitely wasn’t the kind of woman who would welcome a drive-by fling. Apparently she wouldn’t welcome any kind of fling. A good thing.
“I won’t need to call you. I’ve been handling things for three months,” she argued.
“Yes. But I’m here now.”
For several seconds they stood there, toe-to-toe. It was obvious that she didn’t want to give up her control. Maybe it was because of those soulless men she’d known. No matter. He sympathized but he couldn’t compromise with his son.
“I’ll call you if there’s an emergency,” she said.
Which wasn’t exactly the same thing, but it would do. He and Colleen were going to be tangling with each other for the entire time he was here, Dillon thought.
It should have made him angry. Instead he was intrigued.
Watch it, he told himself. This woman is fire.
Unfortunately, he seemed to be attracted to fire, because when she turned to leave he had an insane urge to call her back.
Dillon lay on the sleeper sofa the next morning and scrubbed one hand through his hair. He was tense and uneasy in more ways than one and none of them had much to do with the bumpy metal frame of the sleeper sofa biting into his back.
No, sleeping on Colleen’s porch last night, he had discovered that the walls of the house were thin. There might be a door separating him from the building, but with the porch only covered by a screen, he’d been privy to a view of the windows. Even with the extremely faint and undefined shadow showing through on her light-dimming window shade, he’d been able to tell that Colleen’s bedroom was just off to his left. He’d heard her humming and had been unable to think of anything except for the fact that she was getting ready for bed.
Heat had seared him as he’d tried to force himself to think about the business matters he needed to tend to when he had time tomorrow.
And when he’d awakened moments ago, his first instinct had been to look toward Colleen’s window. His first thought had been to wonder if she realized how her silhouette had fueled his fantasies.
Don’t be an idiot, he told himself. The woman had a ranch to run, a baby to take care of, employees to supervise and a clueless man to train as a father. She had too many things on her plate to add seduction to the list. Besides, there wasn’t a coy bone in her body that he could tell, and with her ranch located off the beaten path, no one would, under ordinary circumstances, ever see anything at all. If she even thought about the possibility that he’d caught a glimpse of her body’s outline on the shade, he knew she’d be appalled. She was already uneasy about him being in the house. Those pretty caramel eyes of hers might spark amber when she looked at him, but if not for Toby, she would never have let him into her house at all. This ranch was clearly a hideout for wounded women and Colleen’s reasons for mistrusting men seemed to go deep.
He understood her need to steer clear of unwise entanglements. Caring for Toby, making sure he had free and clear custody of Toby and preserving his business for Toby was all Dillon could concern himself with from now on.
With that admission, he shoved himself up off the couch, slipped on his jeans, got up and knocked on the door.
When Colleen opened it, she was wearing a white fluffy bathrobe that had seen better days but still reminded him that she had only recently been lying in bed. Her hair was slightly tousled as if some man had plunged his fingers into all those untamed curls. With that image, Dillon’s good intentions took a nosedive. Somehow he forced a good-morning smile to his lips.
She smiled back, even though he noticed that her hands were fidgeting with her belt.
“Where’s Toby?” he asked, trying to get his mind back on track.
“He’s a very early riser, so he’s already been up for a while and had his breakfast.”
Dillon frowned. “I should be doing that. Feeding him, I mean. I’ll have to get up earlier. I apologize.”
She wrinkled her nose. “Don’t apologize. It’s your first full day of daddyhood. Besides, I love being the one to give him his first meal of the day. He’s so alert and fun to watch. Not that I won’t willingly turn the task over to you. You have the right, and yes, you need to get used to his hours, but for today, it’s fine. Millie’s reading to him.”
Dillon lifted a brow. “Isn’t he a little young for books?”
She laughed, the sound deep and husky and delicious. “You say that as if he’s already graduated to sneaking the underwear sections of the Sunday ads. Babies like to be cuddled, and while they’re being cuddled, they especially like listening to you and feeling your voice as it rumbles up through your body. Add in the bright colors of a picture book and you’ve got a winning activity. Plus, Millie loves reading to him as much as I do. She has children but they’re all grown and none of them want to have kids.”
An odd, sad sensation slipped through Dillon. “I’m lucky that you and Millie were the ones to take him in. Not every woman would have cared for him the way the two of you have.” Including, apparently, Toby’s mother.
“I think most people, when faced with a child in need, grow to love that child at least a little.”
“That hasn’t been my experience.”
She blinked, and he realized that he had let something slip that he had never shared, because he wasn’t referring only to Lisa’s treatment of Toby but his own childhood experiences. Bad move. It was the kind of remark that seemed to require an explanation, but he wasn’t prepared to share more than he had already offered, so he merely shook his head, dismissing his hasty words.
Colleen looked troubled but she merely nodded. “You’ll probably want to spend as much time as possible with Toby today. I think just being with him and letting him get used to you will be enough for one day. You’re the first male in his life, so after you’
ve had breakfast and taken a shower or whatever else you need to do, I’ll let Millie know that you’re on dad duty until nap time. She’ll step in if he needs his diaper changed. Later today will be soon enough to tackle the big stuff.”
“You think I can’t handle it yet?”
Her lips curved up in an entrancing smile. “You told me you’d slept in the mud, so I’m sure you can handle a little mess. I’m just not sure if Toby’s ready to be traumatized by a crooked diaper yet.”
Dillon couldn’t help smiling back at her. “Already criticizing my skills, Colleen?”
“Everyone needs practice. Have fun.” With that, she turned toward the back of the house. When she came back a few minutes later, Dillon was finishing his breakfast. He looked up.
Colleen was wearing blue jeans that weren’t exceptionally tight, but that emphasized the length of her legs and the curve of her hips. The cherry-red shirt tucked into the jeans fit where a shirt should fit a woman. She was wearing some sort of green polished glass on a black satin cord around her neck, and he remembered seeing it yesterday, too. In fact, there seemed to be a lot of brightly colored polished glass in the house. Sun catchers and wind chimes hung here and there, the golds and reds and blues and greens turned warm by the light.
“I have to go into town for supplies,” she said, “but I’ll stop in before I head out onto the range again. Toby will go down in an hour or so. Then he’ll take another nap this afternoon, so if you have other things to do, that would be a good time to see to them.”
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll figure it out or I’ll ask Millie. Toby and I will be great. Everything’s fine.” Except for the fact that he had—again—noticed too many things about Colleen that he found attractive. What was wrong with him? He had no intention of getting into a long-term relationship with a woman again, so he needed to get this “problem” under control.
His phone rang, and Colleen gave him a wave as she headed for the door. Dillon looked down and wanted to swear. The call was from Lisa. She hadn’t called him since she’d asked for a divorce and even then she hadn’t called. He’d gotten the message in an e-mail. So why was she calling now?
Anger filled him. Lisa was one of those people who changed their minds about what to wear ten times and then spent all night worrying that they had made the wrong choice. Had she heard that he was coming to Montana to get Toby? How would she react to that? Would she change her mind and decide that she wanted the baby now?
By the time he’d decided that there was no point in speculating about anything at all about his ex-wife and never had been, the phone stopped ringing.
Ten seconds later, the phone in Colleen’s house began to ring. She had already stepped onto the porch and was just closing the door, but she turned around, came back inside and looked at Dillon. Then she walked toward the phone and glanced at the number registered there.
Slowly, she raised her chin and looked into Dillon’s eyes. “It’s her,” she said. She didn’t have to say more.
“I realize that this is your house, but I just think you should know right now,” he said, “that I’m not letting her near Toby.”
Colleen frowned, those pretty brows drawing together. “You shouldn’t drag your child into a battle between you and your ex-wife.” Somehow, the way she said that made him think she had some experience of such things.
Slowly, Dillon shook his head. He walked over to her and stared down into her troubled eyes, taking her hands in his own. “This isn’t about Lisa ending our marriage. We were people whose goals and interests were too different for us to stay married, and I should have realized that before I proposed. We weren’t a logical fit, but I asked her to marry me, anyway, so I’ll take my share of the blame for the failure of the marriage.
“But there’s something else I can’t forgive. She walked away from Toby when he had barely entered the world. She left him and didn’t seem to care what became of him. It couldn’t have been money. I gave her money in the settlement. She just didn’t want him. She didn’t even mention that he was on the way, so I’m not letting her change her mind and try to take him from me now. Especially not when she could change her mind again and do a one-eighty a few days later. What’s more, I’m not apologizing even though I know she’s someone from your past, so don’t ask me to.”
“You’re forgetting that since I’ve known her longer, I may know even more of how she operates,” Colleen said. “Lisa used to go through men like sticks of gum that lost their flavor quickly. The only time she came back to a guy the second time was when she thought he had something to offer her that she had overlooked the first time around.” She kept her chin high as she stared directly into his eyes and dropped this nugget into the conversation.
“Yes, that was her on my cell phone,” he told her, answering the question she hadn’t asked. “So, I’m one of those men she’s contacted a second time. What do you think she’s overlooked that she’s come back for? Do you think she’s developed an urge to raise a baby?”
Colleen’s smile grew taut. “I’ll help you,” she said.
“Why?”
She hesitated, then let out a deep, audible breath. “I suppose I have lots of reasons and some of them aren’t exactly admirable, but the main one is that Toby is a sweet, adorable little boy and…Dillon, he’s just a baby. A total innocent. No one should get to dump him and then turn around and pretend it never happened. When she left here, she didn’t even leave any way for me to get in touch with her in case something happened to him. It was…I don’t know…as if she didn’t even care.”
He digested that bit of information, and indignation for the child in the other room seared his soul. Toby wasn’t old enough to know his mother had abandoned him at birth but someday he would be old enough to realize the truth, and that would hurt him. Dillon wanted to swear, but he was a guest here and he needed to behave.
“Are you going to call her back?” Colleen asked.
“No. Sooner or later I’ll have to talk to her, but not today. I have other calls to make while Toby’s sleeping. Things to do with my firm.”
Colleen looked slightly uncomfortable. She fidgeted with her belt buckle. “I’m sure you have lots of things to do, business you need to get back to, and during the night, it occurred to me…”
He waited.
“Babies sleep a lot. There’s a lot of downtime,” she said. “And you’re a man who’s used to being busy.”
Dillon raised a brow. “How did you reach that conclusion?”
“You were a soldier who led other soldiers. You built structures and started running a company when you were barely out of college and still going to grad school. That’s all in your bio on the Farraday Engineering Web site. In fact, I think one of the articles said something about how you specialized in multitasking, but ranch life moves at a slower pace. That could be a problem. You might get bored here really fast.”
“Meaning I might want to leave here after only a few days.”
“Yes.”
“And take my son with me.”
Her eyes looked stricken. “Yes.”
“Maybe we should set a specific date. I do need to make sure that I know what I’m doing as a father, and I’m more than grateful that you’ve agreed to help me with that, but I can’t stay here too long. Being an absentee owner of a business has drawbacks, and while I did my best to take charge when I was bedridden, now that I’m mobile, it’s past time for me to take back the helm of the firm. If I name a time frame, at least you’ll know when the end is coming. Will that be best?”
Slowly she nodded.
“Three weeks?” he asked.
“That sounds good.” But her voice was a bit tight. Obviously, letting go of Toby would be difficult for her. “Now,” she continued, “is there anything you need while I’m in town? Something that will make the hours when Toby’s napping pass more quickly? Books? Newspapers?”
He laughed. “Pamper the rich, bored male, you mean? Eventually there will be
things I’ll need, but I’m not sure what will be on the list and when I know, I’ll have everything delivered.”
She looked startled. “That won’t be necessary. I have a pickup truck.”
“Yes, but I don’t think a load of lumber and roofing shingles will fit in your truck.”
“Lumber and shingles? I don’t understand.”
Dillon smiled. “I’m more than just a rich man, Colleen. I’m an engineer. I know how to build things and build them right. I can fix your porch.”
She blushed prettily. “I’m afraid I can’t afford it right now.”
“I can.”
“But you’re a—”
He put his finger over her lips to stop her from saying guest.
“You’re helping me. Let me help you. I’m going to do this,” he said. “And a few other things, starting with replacing that sleeper sofa.”
Now, he had her attention. She crossed her arms over chest, which was supposed to make her look stern, he was sure, but only served to draw his attention to her pretty breasts. “I can’t let you do that much,” she said.
“You can’t stop me, Colleen. I’m a man on a mission. Now go do whatever you need to do.”
And stop looking so adorable, he thought as she walked away.
CHAPTER FOUR
HOW am I going to survive this man? Colleen thought as she drove toward town. He had only been here less than a day and already he seemed to fill up her house.
What’s more, when she got to town she found that word of Dillon’s arrival had already spread. “Buying a lot of food, are you? Stocking up?” Alma Anderson asked at the grocery store. “Yeah, a man will eat you out of house and home, especially if he’s a big man. Is he a big man? Is he staying long?”
Colleen pasted on a smile that didn’t say anything but seemed to satisfy Alma.
“Wow, I can’t remember the last time I associated the word man with you, Colleen,” Barb Seltzer added. She was getting ready to expound on that and probably ask more questions when Colleen cut in.
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