by Marian Tee
“If there was something I could do – any of us could do to stop the pain, we’d have done it for you. You know that, don’t you?”
“Y-yes.”
“But there’s nothing. There’s nothing except this.” He pressed his lips to his sister’s head. “You can’t live the rest of your life with this much pain in your heart. It’s impossible. You must find the courage to face him again, Annie – if not for your sake, then for us. Do it for us.”
Chapter Three
“You will likely say I am being biased again, but you have progressed a lot since the first time you came to me, mio figlio.”
“You’re right, Padre Adolfo. I don’t believe you.” Marcus’ tone was faintly ironic, but the twitch of his lips effectively softened the words. “You are a priest before a psychologist, I think. Being optimistic is intrinsic in your line of work.”
The bespectacled white-haired man seated in front of him laughed. “You, on the other hand, are too hard on yourself.” Leaning forward, the priest gave his young and most generous benefactor a brief pat on the hand. “You are a changed man, Marcus.”
The Italian billionaire didn’t speak.
Leaning back, the priest said with an understanding smile, “I may not be as pessimistic as you are, but you must also remember that my, err, line of work prohibits me from lying.”
There was a moment of silence before Marcus inclined his head, saying with a faint grimace, “Touché, Padre.”
“Know that the words weren’t meant to score a point. They’re only to open your eyes to who you’ve become.” Standing up from his armchair to signify the end of their counseling session, the priest offered his hand to the younger man, saying firmly, “No more looking back, Marcus. You are a different man now. Not perfect, but then only God is. What you are now is the best man you can be – and you can only be better when you finally take that leap of faith we have been preparing the entire year for.”
The priest’s words remained with Marcus even when he had long left the parish and was boarding his jet for a half-day flight to Europe. Padre Adolfo made it sound so damn easy, but he knew that when the moment to take the said fucking leap came – he wasn’t sure at all if he would be able to do it.
The last twelve months had not been good to Marcus Ravelli. Every damn day was still a constant struggle, and when he was alone – like now – he couldn’t help questioning himself. Even if he did change – even if he had changed – was that enough to make him deserving of another chance with Anneke?
Being served divorce papers had brought Marcus to the lowest point of his life, and he had ceased caring about anything, anyone, and certainly not himself. His company would’ve gone belly-up if not for Jaike urging her husband Derek Christopoulos to make a timely intervention. The couple had been the only ones unafraid of him – and cared enough for him – to keep Marcus from self-destructing. Even so, he had resisted their every effort to help him, his manner violent and abrasive until that one day the Greek billionaire had bailed him out of jail.
“Drunken fights are your thing now?” Derek asked pleasantly as soon as Marcus stumbled inside the limousine after him.
“Fuck you.”
“You’re welcome.” As the limousine sped away, the younger man suggested, “How about a bargain?”
Marcus only looked at the Greek billionaire, and when the other man raised his eyebrow at him as if expecting an answer, he said derisively, “I’m supposed to be the drunk one here.”
“You are, but my offer also stands true. Let me tell you a story, and if you still choose not to straighten up your act, then we’ll stay out of your hair, permanently.”
“You’re either fucking pulling my leg or you’re insane. Do you think you’re fucking Scheherazade and you can change my fucking mind just because of one goddamn story?”
The younger man only shrugged. “Take it or leave it. That’s the only offer you’ll get from me.”
Marcus shook his head, muttering in disgust, “Suit yourself. Talk away.”
“Well then---”
“Aren’t you going to start with ‘once upon a fucking time’?” he sneered.
Derek only smiled. “If you think it matters, then why not?” Turning away, the Greek billionaire settled his green gaze on the passing scenery outside the car window. “Once upon a fucking time, I treated Jaike like a slut.”
Marcus stiffened in his seat.
But it had only gotten worse, and every goddamn word was like a bucket of ice-cold water pouring down his head. Marcus had thought he was long past feeling anything, but with every word Derek spoke---
He realized he could still feel.
And when the Greek billionaire was done, Marcus could only ask numbly, “Why?” Why would Derek Christopoulos reveal to him such a thing?
“Because you’re acting like you’re the only man who could hurt the woman he loves.” Derek’s lips twisted. “But as you now know, that’s not true at all. In fact, between the two of us – which do you think is the bigger monster?”
When Marcus didn’t speak, the younger man only smiled. “You pushed your wife away because you cared for her. I nearly destroyed Jaike because I thought she betrayed me – when she did not. And yet---” Derek splayed his hands wide open in a gesture of fatalistic acceptance. “I’ve lived to be the luckiest bastard in the world. I’m still with Jaike, and for the strangest reason, she actually loves me back. And do you know why?”
Marcus still didn’t answer.
“Because I fought to get her back, one last time.”
On the day that should have been her first wedding anniversary, Anneke flew out of the country, wanting – needing – to be alone. As she settled down for the flight, Anneke immediately plugged her ears and began browsing for a movie to watch. She feared she’d go mad if she allowed her mind to dwell on the fact that a year had already passed – and she was still Mrs. Ravelli.
Why, oh, why wouldn’t he just agree to the divorce?
Closure, her smoking-hot friend Alyx had once suggested to her. But since that girl was a closet romantic, Anneke didn’t want to think much of it.
Because he’s goddamn petty, her other friend Fredericka had put forward. But then again, the half-Russian state attorney was known to be quite clueless and dense about men, so Anneke couldn’t take Fredericka’s words seriously either.
Of course, there was also Willem and his little theory, but she didn’t want to think of that. She couldn’t afford to think of that, period. She supposed she could always try talking to her other brothers or even Fleur, but doing so simply didn’t feel right. It was bad enough to have Willem concerned about her, and so that left Anneke with---
Me, myself, and I to solve my problem, Anneke thought with a sigh, like always. As she took her luggage from the baggage conveyor and stepped out of Contini’s airport, she promised herself she would use this time away to properly reflect on her next move.
And so she should, Anneke thought dumbly the next moment, because it seemed as if her depression had finally gotten the better of her. Her mind was now playing tricks, making it seem like Marcus Ravelli was standing across the airport road, staring back at her.
But he wasn’t…right?
Anneke rubbed her eyes several times, but when her vision of him didn’t waver, she had to accept she wasn’t seeing things.
Her fingers tightened its grip on the handle of her luggage.
Marcus.
Her Marcus.
It really was her Marcus, right in front of her.
Chapter Four
Marcus’ body became rigid in his effort to remain still. One last time. One last time. One last time. He focused on the thought, a badly needed reminder of just how important this meeting was and why he should control himself and not succumb to the very basic urge to snatch her into his arms---
Dio.
He had missed her so goddamn much.
How beautiful she was, every inch the blonde, blue-eyed angel that had never
stopped haunting his dreams. She was dressed in a striped sweater that bared her midriff when she raised her arms, a pair of white corduroy slacks, and loafers – a look that was both laidback and elegant at the same time, one that spoke volumes of how different she was from other European heiresses. Most others only had beauty to speak of, but Anneke was – had always been, and would always be – more, in every way.
When she finally started to move, Marcus shoved his hands into his pockets and fought to keep his cool. Anneke was approaching him like a wary little animal about to bolt off any second, and he definitely didn’t want that to happen.
Anneke’s mind swirled with more and more questions with every step she took. Why was he here? Did he know she would be here? What would happen now? She could feel her mind reeling as she came closer and closer to him, and her heart – oh God, her heart.
Her heart was beating so hard and fast, it was as if it was making up for lost time.
And how silly, how oh so stupid was that?
Anneke nearly tripped over her own feet as she came to a halt before Marcus. He really was here, she thought dizzily. She knew she shouldn’t stare, but she couldn’t help it. Had his raven black hair always gleamed this brightly under the sun? Had his eyes always been this dark? And had his body always been this hard…this macho?
Even the fact that she had to crane her neck so much to meet his gaze was a surprise to Anneke---
So many little things, she couldn’t help thinking with a painful squeeze of her heart, that she thought she could – would – never forget but actually had.
When her blue eyes lifted to his once more, Marcus said quietly, “Ciao, bambina.”
Ciao, bambina.
The velvety sound of his voice, the faint Italian accent threading through the words---
It was this, of all things, that made her composure slip a little, and Anneke had an insane urge to laugh and cry at the same time.
It really was the simple things, wasn’t it?
She had lost count of the times she had dreamt of this moment, had imagined an infinite number of scenarios, of the things she would say or do if they ever bumped into each other---
But none of it had been like this.
None of it had been this simple.
This bittersweet.
After taking a deep breath, she said tremulously, “Hello.” And to her own surprise, she even managed a smile
Ah. The way Anneke’s lips curved threatened to knock Marcus off his feet, and he found himself blinking, like a man caged in darkness seeing sunlight for the first time in a very long while.
Anneke’s forehead furrowed at the suddenly stunned expression that had fallen on Marcus’ face. “Is – is everything okay?” she asked uncertainly.
The words had Marcus crashing back to reality, and he cursed silently in his mind. What the fuck did he think he was doing? He raked a hand through his hair, frustrated and more than a little disturbed at the way a simple smile could have him so disoriented.
He cleared his throat, feeling all the while like he had just reverted into a schoolboy in his first throes of infatuation.
Ah, fuck, who would have thought he could ever be this bad with a woman?
He was even worse off now compared to how he had been at eighteen.
Anneke’s confusion grew when all Marcus Ravelli did was clear his throat and stare at her. Her lips parted, “M---” But she caught herself in time, her face paling as soon as she realized she had almost allowed herself to say his name.
And she couldn’t let that happen.
She couldn’t.
Because it wasn’t supposed to be that easy – right?
Marcus’ eyes darkened. She had been about to say his name. He was damn sure of it, and he didn’t know why it was so but that she almost had – it mattered.
It just fucking mattered, and the anxiety presently strangling his heart slightly loosened its hold at the realization.
It mattered, enough for him to take a deep breath of his own – and try again.
“I have a car waiting. If it’s alright with you – perhaps we could talk somewhere?”
The invitation completely took Anneke aback, and she stammered, “N-now?”
Marcus nodded. “Wherever you want.”
She gnawed on her lip. What to do, what to do? This was a man she hadn’t seen almost a year, a man that she had also been married to for the same amount of time. This was the man she had once loved, the same man who had broken her heart by walking out on her after---
After---
Marcus knew the exact second Anneke remembered that moment. It was the way her body suddenly jerked, the way her face whitened---
And when her lips started to part, he also knew she was about to turn him away---
As she rightly deserved, Marcus acknowledged grimly, but unfortunately for Anneke, he wasn’t going to make it easy for her to get rid of him.
Before she could say a word, he said roughly, “Per favore, bambina.” If anyone had told Marcus he would one day act on love lessons given to him by Jaike Hepburn’s husband – a man who had also been his rival once upon a time – Marcus would have had that person committed.
And yet that was exactly what was happening.
This was the one most important lesson that Derek Christopoulos had taught him: selflessness was sometimes just another word for cowardice, for fear of rejection. Sometimes, true love – or at least fighting for it – required one to be shameless. Selfish. Dishonorable.
Like what he was doing now, Marcus thought with an inner grimace. The moment he had seen Anneke again, he had known that the sexual chemistry between them was there. And he might be an emotional fuckup because of his parents, but his parents were also the people who had taught him about the drugging power of sex.
And if that was what it took to get Anneke to say yes to letting him spend more time with her---
“I just want to talk, bambina.” He held her gaze captive as he spoke and didn’t hesitate to use the endearment he knew she loved. And when she looked visibly torn, he didn’t hesitate to press his advantage, reaching out to hold her hands in his---
The moment their hands came into contact, it sent a simultaneous jolt into both of their bodies, its strength taking even Marcus by surprise, and he sucked in his breath just as Anneke gasped out loud.
Unable to help it, his grip tightened on hers---
He expected her to pull away, but she didn’t.
And even though it terrified him to death---
He couldn’t help but hope.
Ah, these hands of hers.
Perhaps…he still had a chance to hold on to them, forever.
Chapter Five
Anneke fidgeted restlessly on her seat, unable to believe that she had allowed Marcus Ravelli persuade her into having coffee with him. This was such a bad idea, a really, really bad idea---
So was why she was still here, waiting on the table like a good girl just because Marcus had told her to?
She took hold of her luggage, but as soon as she rose to her feet, she heard the Italian billionaire drawl from behind, “Thinking of running away, bambina?”
Crap. Pride forbade her to admit the truth, and as soon as he came into view, she said stiffly, “Actually, I was thinking to check if you had run out on me.” And then she heard herself add, “Which you’ve already done in the past – oh!” Her hands flew to cover her offending mouth as soon as Anneke realized what she had just blurted out. Dear Lord, where had that come from?
She held her breath, mentally cringing at the many things Marcus could say, but instead he only handed Anneke her coffee, and she took it, stammering, “T-thank you.”
“Shall we?” He gestured to their seats.
She nodded jerkily and as soon as she took her seat, Marcus followed suit.
And then silence.
Crap, oh crap.
“Well, then…”
Anneke held her breath again.
“That was one
hell of an icebreaker.”
A small squeak of embarrassment escaped her. “I’m sorry,” Anneke blurted out. “I don’t know what came over me.”
“No apologies necessary,” Marcus said smoothly, “since it’s completely true.”
In a blink of an eye, the moment of lightheartedness between them came to an end, and a tense kind of silence fell in replacement.
So they were really going to do this then, Anneke thought dumbly. They were finally going to hash things out, here, now. As she raised the cup to her lips and took a sip, she felt his gaze settle on her, dark and intense.
As she lowered the cup, Marcus began, “I’d like to---”
Anneke cut him off, saying stiltedly, “Willem told me you were fighting the divorce because you wanted to ask me why. He said you were waiting for me to come to you, to ask you why you were doing the things you were doing.”
Marcus stilled.
“He said---” And this time, Anneke could no longer keep her voice from trembling. “He said you weren’t acting like a husband who had thrown his wife away on their first night of marriage.”
Marcus sucked his breath. “Anneke---”
She shook her head, forcing his words to a stop. “But we both know that’s exactly what happened.”
Marcus put his own cup on the table, fearing he’d accidentally crush it. Leaning forward, he said in a low, driven tone, “It won’t happen again.”
Anneke couldn’t help raising her gaze to his, asking incredulously, “That’s all you have to say?”
“No.” His tone was curt. “I can say with complete honesty that I haven’t fucked another woman since you left me. And that includes the woman you saw me with that night---”
“Liar.” Anneke could only stare at Marcus. What in the world made him think she was so gullible she’d fall for such a lie?
“I can prove it.” There was a slight pause, and then Marcus said abruptly, “And your brother Jaak can testify that it is so.”
The words stunned her into silence. Jaak? Her own brother could corroborate such a story?