“Yeah, I remember.”
“If anyone should understand the situation, it’s you and Niko. You two know what went down all those years ago. You knew he wasn’t singing original work, yet his name is on every one of those songs in the credits as the song writer along with you, Kris and Niko. He didn’t even credit me and you know the songs on your last two albums were based on poems I wrote to him.
“So, when you get ready to call me a bitch or a cunt, remember I could sue him but I won’t. I’ll let him keep the money because I plan on taking this band farther than he ever could, and when I do, I’ll be given credit, so it’s no skin off my nose. They were all bullshit poems anyway, the meandering thoughts of a maudlin teenager. I’ve written better songs for Chyna Bleu without half the effort.”
“See you downstairs in ten minutes,” Linx finally said, after an uncomfortable silence settled between them.
“That’s fine. We’re gonna rock Tokyo tonight so chin up. Learn to smile. You’re a very sexy specimen when you do and women find confident alpha males attractive, Linx. Stop hiding under the emo-beta persona your ex-wife has superimposed on you, because we both know you were never that. I remember you when we lived in Boston. And it’s nice to know some people, like Cassidy, simply don’t have the capability to change, but you do. Know your worth and own it. You’re highly talented and you will get a lot more out of this life when you grab it by the balls, rather than trying to quietly get through life with the least amount of effort involved.”
Linx didn’t know what to say to a comment like that. Instead he said nothing and looked at her with a wry smile before he closed the door.
It was easier to take on life one day at a time. If he tried to focus on the bigger picture, it might just destroy his peace of mind and he clung to that with everything inside him. He couldn’t afford to be careless and he refused to allow anyone inside.
Love was a pain he couldn’t afford at the moment.
He finished getting ready and closed the door to his suite before he walked down the hallway and waited to board the elevator.
Niko met up with him as he stepped inside and smirked with quiet arrogance. “Tonight, I’ll let you call first dibs so you won’t get stuck with that skank like you did in Dubai. Deal?”
They slammed knuckles against one another. “Sounds like a plan, brother.”
Faceless sex with a random groupie was easier and it safeguarded his heart. He was still a man after all and needed to get laid.
What the fuck did love have to do with the pursuit of carnal knowledge anyway?
Chapter Seven
I WALKED AROUND Clooney’s patch party and thanked God this would be one of the last club events I would be forced to attend.
It had been exactly three hours since it’d started, and after a quick, sweaty session of urgent, angry sex in his room, we emerged and both mingled. I pretended I didn’t see my brother take him back to the room they used for church, and grabbed a Heineken after I chased a shot of strong Macallan with Keri before we settled on a comfy sofa.
“What do you think they’re talking about?” I questioned out loud, though I didn’t think she would have much to say.
She stretched, crossing long, slender legs out on display in a short white skirt, and the pink angora sweater showing toned stomach. The pink, patent leather knee-high, hooker boots she wore matched her sweater.
“You, darlin’. Trey is spelling it out to him that if he wants to stay in the club then he is going to back the fuck away from you and let you live your life peacefully at Stanford,” she replied as she drank half her Budweiser in a couple of swigs and burped loudly.
The blood in my veins began to boil. “You are kidding, right? Who the hell does he think he is?”
“Well, your older brother for one, and he doesn’t want you to become a piece of club ass. You’re better than that and he isn’t afraid to let anyone know that either. He’s incredibly protective over you and he isn’t going to let a newbie member like Clooney think he has any power. The first part of that lesson is stripping you from him.”
I drank from my Heineken before I stood and walked directly to the closed double doors. I heard nothing but the rush of blood in my ears and a thundering heart, which beat with wild intensity in my chest. I was so pissed at Trey, I could have killed him myself at that very moment.
I opened the doors and saw Trey and Clooney sitting close to one another. They both stood from the table before my brother said, “Close the fucking door, Trista, and join us.”
Who the hell did he think he was?
I did as I was told before I walked over and stood between the two men, one being my over-protective brother and the other being my boyfriend and first “love”, if I could call being mildly infatuated with a guy I was used to having sex with, love.
Trey grabbed my right arm and pulled me toward him before he glared at Clooney with cool hazel-green eyes. “Don’t you have something to tell my sister?”
Clooney’s face turned beet red from the neck up as he mumbled, “You don’t belong here and you should go. We’re through. I’m ending what we have right now.”
What. The. Fuck.
My boyfriend was dumping me, when all along I planned to dump him when I arrived at Stanford. I felt guilty as hell about my decision, but no longer, as his steel gray eyes met mine and they were cold as frosted glass.
The tears came whether I wanted them to or not and soon I had torn my arm from Trey’s grip and embraced Clooney. “You don’t mean that. I don’t know what could happen but there might be a future between us. You never know!”
He grabbed me by the shoulders as he stepped back out of my personal space. “You and I both know there is nothing between us. I love you but I can’t make you live a life you don’t want and we both know you will never be any man’s old lady.”
I wiped the tears away savagely and gathered my dignity off the floor. “Fine. You want to end it like this? It’s done and we are fucking over!”
“Trista, the club has to come first and I have no choice—”
I didn’t bother to stick around for his pitiful excuses. I was too drunk to drive the family Ford Explorer but I got in and sped out of the compound like my ass was on fire.
Clooney was a free agent now because he’d ended it with me and not the other way around. The sudden change of events had me seeing red but I drove cautiously and blasted Winter’s Regret latest album.
“You’re a soul destroyer and you kill me with kindness and sweet kisses but in the end, you’ll just leave me. I don’t want to believe in you, but I have no choice if I want to be free. Inside your eyes, your soul is pure and bright. Don’t you dare put out the light and leave me empty and bleeding. I would never recover and love is so fucking fleeting…promise me you’ll always be here for me! Kiss me, take me, fuck me, be fake with me but just don’t leave me.”
I turned up the song, “Ugly Love” and the tears slowly leaked from my eyes again. I knew it was Trey’s doing and Clooney didn’t want to end it with me. Unfortunately the club didn’t work that way and since my brother was Sergeant at Arms, he could order anything he wanted. I despised him at that moment, though he’d forced me to keep the promise I’d made the day before.
Clooney and I were officially over and the only thing I could do was cry. I felt pretty pathetic.
I ARRIVED HOME to an empty house.
My parents weren’t there and I wondered if they were working late. I was also concerned about where Tristan and Taryn were and immediately voice dialed his phone.
“Yo, what up, baby sis?” he greeted in an enthusiastic voice.
“Where are you and Taryn?”
He immediately picked up on my maudlin attitude. “We’re with Mom and Dad. Remember I told you about wanting to ask Taryn to marry me? I need to get their permission first and if they agree then we’ll have a huge engagement party.”
“What about Dizzy Cox? You aren’t worried about becoming engaged to h
is niece and what he might do?”
“Maeve gave her permission it was okay…she’s Taryn’s mother. I don’t give a fuck what Dizzy thinks to be honest.” He was obviously outside, as I heard noises around him and knew he was smoking since he was talking in a normal voice.
“Sounds reasonable,” I murmured, before the tears tumbled down my cheeks. There I was, little Ms. Waterworks crying yet again like a freakin’ sixteen year old who had been dumped by the quarterback in high school.
“Oh, man…so Trey followed through and spoke with Clooney, huh?”
I grabbed a handful of Kleenex and wiped my eyes before blowing my nose. “How did you know?”
“Dad called him this morning and he told him if he wanted access to this family again, he would make that no-good bastard end your relationship. Trey has always hated how Dad turned his back on him. He wants to be part of our family again—don’t you understand that?—and what a better way to do it? I’m sorry you got hurt in the process but I thought you were going to dump him when you got to California?”
“I was,” I said in a soft voice, “but it would have been my decision to make and now that it’s been taken away from me. I’m unreasonably resentful and angry.”
Tristan laughed out loud on the other end. “At the end of the day, does it really matter who ended it? The deed is over and done with, and now you’re free to find a guy who is worthy of your time and affection. You can mess with any guy at Stanford and you get to leave without that shit hanging over your head. It’s what we all thought you wanted.”
“I did but I wanted it to happen on my terms—not yours, not Dad’s and certainly not Trey’s. It’s like he started swinging his dick around because he has power in the club and could make Clooney do what he wanted him to do. Even Keri knew about it before I did. Why didn’t anyone warn me? There I was slobbering like an idiot for him not to leave me, and the decision had already been made by people way above his fucking pay grade.”
“Listen, I had nothing to do with it. This all falls on Trey, and to me, he did the right thing.” My brother sighed quietly. “Would you rather be with Clooney knowing what you were going to do or have Trey back in our lives? Properly, this time. No more sneaking around and going to the clubhouse to see him. Dad said he could come by whenever he wanted. I don’t know how you feel, but I have missed my older brother. There were times I could have really used him and every time I went to the clubhouse to see him, I felt guilty.
“I’m not a deceitful person by nature and I didn’t like defying Dad. This way, neither one of us have to, and if all it cost you was a boyfriend you were gonna get rid of anyway, then what’s the big deal? I know you’re upset now, but you know it’s for the best, and it’s one less burden for you take with you to Stanford. That’s all I have to say about the situation.”
“You’re right,” I replied, and wiped my tear stained cheeks. “We can talk about this when you get home but I really hope Mom and Dad allow you to marry Taryn. She’s a sweet girl and I really would love to have her as a future sister-in-law.”
“Yeah, she feels the same, especially when she found out Talia was our cousin. She loves Winter’s Regret and almost fainted when she heard they are going to re-record the first two albums with Talia singing.”
“I know.” I sat up in bed and stared at my Facebook timeline on my HP laptop. “I’ve seen some of the concerts they’ve performed on YouTube and I still can’t believe that is our cousin up there. She looks amazing and happy.”
“One day, you’ll be happy too, sis. The pain will go away because there is an irresistibly hot guy out there for you, and he is going to rock your world and turn you inside out. The beauty of the situation is you’ll never see him coming.”
I smiled at this statement because no matter how pissed off or immature I acted at times, Tristan always saw the silver lining in every cloud of despair. He was such an upbeat person and I was more than delighted to call him my brother.
“You’re right. I look forward to good news tonight.”
“I look forward to telling you some good news tonight—both Taryn and I do.”
“Bye for now and I love you, big brother.”
“I love you more, baby sister.”
He ended the call and I set my cell phone on the bedside oak table before I picked up my Kindle Fire HD and began the latest novel by one of my favorite indie authors. It was a rock and roll novel and I couldn’t wait to dig in after it’d seemed to burn a hole in my tablet for over a week.
I have always loved to read and enjoy it, though I had to admit I didn’t get to do it as much I would have liked. Now that I didn’t have a boyfriend, I could catch up on my endless To-Be-Read list and update my Goodreads page. It was little things like this—reading and listening to my favorite bands on my iPod docked into my clock radio—I’d missed while dating Clooney.
My favorite playlist was the perfect soundtrack for reading. A mixture of Winter’s Regret, Deftones, Fall Out Boy, Scarlet Fever and some “girl power” courtesy of Rihanna, Trilogy, Ke$ha, P!nk, and Ellie Goulding, I was in music heaven.
I must have dozed off because I awoke to Trilogy’s “Endless Pain”. My Kindle had turned itself off and I sat up before I placed it next to my phone. I paused the iPod and listened to the quiet house before I heard it again, hard knocks on the front double doors followed by an incessant ring from the doorbell.
My first instinct was completely numbing, while my stomach twisted into knots and I felt like upchucking the food and alcohol I’d consumed earlier that evening. I sat up and crawled off the bed before I walked straight to the coat closet where my dad kept a .22 just in case. I knew how to use it like every other young person in the country. We lived in the wild heart of the North, where guns were still a necessity and parents didn’t lock up their stock; instead they taught their children about the power of guns and we learned how to handle the weapons with respect and a last resort measure.
“Don’t ever place a gun in your hand if you aren’t prepared to end someone’s life, you got that?” my dad had told me a long time ago, and I’d nodded vigorously.
If I hadn’t been the only person in the house, I wouldn’t have even thought about grabbing the weapon.
The hard knocking came again, followed by the doorbell chimes.
“Who is it?” I questioned loudly, while still ten feet away from the double doors.
“Sheriff Briggs, Pine Bluff Police Department, Ms. Lennon.”
I breathed a sigh of relief and slipped the gun inside my father’s black wool coat, which hung on a nearby coat rack. I smoothed my hair and opened one of the heavy oak doors.
The Sheriff stood there with two of his Deputies. Their police lights lit up the police cruisers parked in the circular driveway and they all looked tired and worn out.
The tears came, despite my best effort to stop them. “Yes?”
Briggs had an interesting face. Half-Washoe Native American, a quarter black and a quarter Irish, his café au lait complexion was smooth and clear while his light brown eyes and Washoe facial features made him seem almost like a wax statue. He was a stocky man, though he was pure muscle and could have been mistaken for Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s brother.
His wife was Welsh—the cousin of Lorna Hughes, Jonesy’s old lady—and although he wasn’t a bent cop, he let the Demon’s Bastards get away with a lot as long as they kept the violence out of Pine Bluff. He didn’t have much of a choice, due to his ties through marriage with the club.
“What’s going on, Sheriff?” I wondered out loud in a shaky voice.
I started to mentally count down from one hundred, just to steady my wildly beating heart and shortness of breath.
“Trista, I’m so sorry. It’s about your family and your brother’s fiancée…can we come in? You might want to be seated for the news.”
My chest heaved up and down as I began to have a full-on panic attack. The only sound that kept me grounded was the roaring of a Harley down our
circular driveway. Trey parked quickly, took off his helmet, and ran past the cops who tried to stop him before he ran to my side and embraced me.
“I came as soon as I heard,” he whispered in my ear, before he faced me with tear-filled, hazel-green eyes. “What’s going on, Briggs? The officers wouldn’t tell me a goddamn thing at the clubhouse. Only that there was an accident and my baby sister was at home alone.”
“Trey, I am going to have to advise you to take your sister into the living room.”
I still clung to my oldest brother before I whispered to him, “I need a pill before I hear the news.”
“Can you give me five fucking minutes alone with my sister?” he yelled at the Sheriff.
Briggs looked at his deputies, turned our way again and reluctantly nodded his head. “Make it quick.”
Trey and I walked to my room and I kind of sunk to the floor next to my open door. I was still in the throes of a full anxiety attack and it wasn’t pretty. I breathed heavily, my heart thundered in my chest and I felt light-headed and not at all like myself. He knew where my Xanax was stashed and slid a two milligram tablet in my mouth and shoved a bottle of water in my hand.
The pill dissolved in my mouth without the aid of the water and it tasted bitter and disgusting, the paste of it clinging to my tongue and throat.
“Drink some water, sweetie.”
I finally lifted the bottle to my lips and drank half the contents. I could feel it starting to numb me, but it wouldn’t destroy the pain in my heart, and I still didn’t know exactly what was going on.
Trey took me in his arms and sat next to me and as he stroked my hair. “I’m so sorry, honey. I can’t help feeling like all this shit is my fault.”
“What did you do?” I wondered out loud.
He didn’t answer.
“What the fuck did you do, Trey?” I began to beat his chest with my fists and he didn’t try to fight me, but two police officers came in and pulled me off my brother.
“Goddamn it, I need you two to act like adults here!” Briggs exclaimed as he entered my bedroom.
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