There was a meanness in her aunt’s voice that scared Autumn.
“What did you tell him?”
“I told him you’d give it up if he was patient. I told him he’d be the one to get your cherry. I didn’t count on you throwing it at the first customer to walk into the hotel before he got a chance to collect. That’s the reason he never paid your wages by the way.”
“That’s also probably the reason his wife treated me so badly.”
“That’s your problem, whore. If you spread your legs for married man, what can you expect?”
“But I didn’t spread my legs, not for anyone.”
Aunt Shirley laughed, a spiteful cackle that made Autumn’s skin crawl.
“You tell yourself that if you want, missy. We all know what you’re up to.”
“I’m not up to anything.”
“And I suppose you’re just with that man for the company.”
Autumn felt her cheeks turn red. It was true she’d had thoughts of taking things further with Grady, but what was wrong with that? She was a single woman. He was a single man. They were both clearly attracted to each other. She certainly wasn’t trying to use him to pay the medical bills, if that’s what her aunt was insinuating. And she doubly wasn’t going to have sex with him just to get herself out of the Raven’s Nest.
“I can’t believe you told Mr. Hildegard he’d get his way with me,” Autumn said, trying to change the subject. “If anyone was trying to whore me out, it was you.”
“Oh, you little brat. I was just trying to help you and your mother. Stop you from being a burden on the rest of the family.”
“We’ve never been a burden on anyone, Aunt Shirley, and we aren’t going to be now either.”
Aunt Shirley stormed off, leaving Autumn alone with Destiny. She looked down at the baby. She was still looking through the window at the other babies, utterly fascinated by them.
Autumn took a deep breath. She knew her aunt was bitter, she knew she could lash out in jealousy from time to time, but that never made it any easier to take when it happened. She closed her eyes, took deep breaths and calmed herself. She didn’t want to distress Destiny by panicking.
Besides, she knew in her heart that what Aunt Shirley had been trying to say wasn’t true. She liked Grady, yes, but she wasn’t a gold digger. She wasn’t using him to get the bills paid. And what’s more, Grady wouldn’t allow that to happen either. If he’d wanted, he could have slept with her already. She knew that much was true. She’d never been with a man before, she didn’t know exactly how those things unfolded, but she was smart enough to know that if Grady had made a move on her in the motel, she’d have allowed it. She’d have been like putty in his hands. She’d have shut her eyes, opened her legs, and given herself to him.
She still would, if he wanted her to.
CHAPTER 29
AUTUMN
Autumn spent the rest of the visit staying out of her aunt’s way. She knew where it came from. Aunt Shirley was her mother’s younger sister, and for some reason, had always been jealous of Autumn in the way a sister might be. It was something Autumn had learned to get used to, and she still knew she was leaving her mother in good hands by leaving her with Aunt Shirley watching over her. She could be spiteful when it came to Autumn, but she could be trusted to do the right thing when it came to her mother.
She noticed that Grady seemed to instinctively stay close to her, as if he sensed she needed his protection. She appreciated having him there more than words could express. And not just because he’d gone into the office with the doctors and arranged to settle her mother’s billing. It was more than that. It really did feel like she was there with Grady. He wasn’t just some stranger who’d taken her home as a favor, he was there because he wanted to be there, with her.
It was an emotional farewell saying goodbye to her mother. She hugged her the way a daughter hugs her mother when she knows there’s a chance she might never see her again. She didn’t want to think like that, in fact she refused to admit the truth to herself, but subconsciously she knew her mother was getting close to the end, even with the best doctors money could buy.
“I love you, sweet girl,” her mother whispered in her ear as they hugged, and she sensed there was more to it than the usual goodbye.
It was like her mother knew it might be the last time she said goodbye.
“You don’t have to leave,” her mother said, but Autumn knew differently.
“Mom,” she said, “we can’t rely on Mr. Cole to pay the bills forever. I have to go back to the hotel.”
“I don’t want you there,” her mother said, but there wasn’t much resistance in her voice.
It was as if she knew that things wouldn’t be as bad for Autumn when she got back to Montana. Maybe she, or even Aunt Shirley, had spoken to the Hildegards. Or maybe it was just hope, or the knowledge that if things got too bad, Autumn would take matters into her own hands. Autumn wasn’t sure why, but for some reason, her mother seemed to have greater confidence in her return.
Whereas the day before, she’d been determined never to let her daughter go back to that hotel, she now just smiled knowingly as she said goodbye.
Autumn looked at Grady, wondering if maybe it was his presence that gave her mother such newfound confidence. Did she think Grady was going to look out for her?
“Goodbye, Mr. Cole,” her mother said, and when Grady told her to call him by his first name, she smiled knowingly and said, “not yet.”
Autumn got into the car next to Grady and had to admit, his presence did make her feel like things were going to be better from now on. It felt like there was no way she could end up in a bad place, least of all the clutches of the Hildegards, when she had a friend like Grady Cole by her side.
The more she thought about it, the more she came to the conclusion he was the reason her mother had been so calm about sending her back.
“Your mother is a good woman,” Grady said as they drove out of the town and back onto the interstate. “You sure you’re okay leaving her here with your aunt.”
Autumn nodded. “I have to. I can’t stay tied to her apron strings forever.”
“That’s true,” Grady said.
“Besides, despite your generosity, I’ve got to go back to my job. We can’t just let you foot the bill for everything. I’ve got to at least try to contribute.”
“You think there’s still a job waiting for you?”
Autumn had been worrying about that, but she hadn’t allowed it to stop her getting back in the car with Grady. Perhaps, just like her mother, it was because of Grady that she assumed things would go better for her on this second attempt to start a life in Montana.
“I don’t know,” she said. “They’ll still need someone to help them.”
“And you want to be that person?”
Autumn shrugged.
Grady smiled kindly.
“They’re kind of mean,” he said.
She nodded.
“I guess there are other jobs you could do.”
“Like what? The grocery store?”
“Yeah, the grocery store for one.”
“Or the diner,” Autumn said.
“I was thinking maybe something more in the field of childcare.”
Autumn looked at him. Grady took his eyes off the road briefly to smile at her, then looked away. She felt her cheeks flush. She wasn’t sure what he was offering, but something told her it had the potential to change the entire direction of her life.
“What do you mean?”
He said nothing for a minute and when he spoke he sounded strangely vulnerable.
“Just something to think about,” he said. “I’d appreciate having you around. I know you can bring happiness into mine and Destiny’s life.”
“Really?” Autumn said. “Happiness?”
Grady didn’t look at her but kept his eyes on the highway. It was his turn to blush.
They drove on and Autumn turned on the radio to fill t
he silence. Her mind was racing. What was Grady offering her? Did he want a live-in nanny to help with Destiny? Did he want a woman in his life to do more than help out? Was he looking for a relationship? There were so many possible interpretations to his statement and she didn’t know if they thrilled her or terrified her.
Did she want to move in with this man she barely knew? This man who’d obviously been through so much in his life, had a tumultuous past and a child from another woman? This man who had the power to make her heart race just by glancing in her direction?
The morning turned to afternoon and they stopped for lunch at a restaurant by the side of the highway. Autumn brought the baby inside in her arms and Grady carried the carseat. They set it up in their booth and Destiny slept through lunch.
When their food arrived, Autumn started eating hungrily before noticing that Grady was watching her.
“Do I have something on my face?” she said, wiping her mouth.
“Oh, no, sorry for staring, it’s just …”
“Just what?”
“Has anyone ever said you’re cute when you eat?”
She looked at him and a grin spread across her face. She couldn’t help it. She’d never known a man could be so sweet. Maybe if there’d been a man in her house growing up she’d have known better what to expect, but it was all so new to her.
“No,” she said. “My mother always tells me I’m unladylike.”
“There’s nothing unladylike about you, Autumn Lane.”
Autumn took another bite of her club sandwich but felt self-conscious. Grady laughed and looked down at his own food.
“Sorry, I’ll stop staring at you. I promise.”
She took a sip of her coffee and smiled. “It’s okay. I like it when you look at me.”
After lunch they drove on and something happened that took Autumn’s breath away. She was sitting next to Grady, same as she’d been for hours, when he reached down from the steering wheel and took her hand. It was beginning to get dark and she was thankful the darkness would hide her blushes. She felt so shy.
His hand was in her lap and she looked down at it, too scared to look at his face.
What did this mean?
His big hand held her smaller hand, and the weight of it on her lap was electrifying. She felt heat build between her legs, right beneath where his hand was resting, and when he squeezed her hand slightly she shut her eyes.
She’d never been with a man before and she knew what was happening.
“Grady,” she said, so quietly she barely heard her own voice.
“Yes,” he said.
“What’s going to happen?”
Grady smiled at her and then winked.
Autumn laughed.
“What’s going to happen?” he repeated.
“Yes. I’ve never done this before.”
“I’ll tell you what’s going to happen. What I’ve wanted to happen since the first second I set eyes on you.”
“Really?”
“You have no idea, Autumn.”
She felt a pang of guilt as she thought back to the night in Betsy’s room with Mrs. Hildegard. They’d spied on him. Then later, Autumn had crept back in and watched him masturbate. She’d touched herself. He had no idea it had happened and she wondered now what he’d make of it.
She felt the same way he did. It was as if this had been building since the moment they first met. It was almost like it was meant to be, and nothing they did would stop it from happening.
“Then what are we waiting for?” she said, and the second she said it, she threw her hand over her mouth.
She couldn’t believe she’d had the guts to say that.
Grady didn’t miss a beat. He got into the exit lane and they were off the highway and pulling into the lot of a motel a minute later. He grabbed the baby in the carseat and what little luggage they had and led the way into the hotel.
They got a room for the night, put Destiny’s carseat on the sofa in the seating area of their room, and threw the luggage in the closet by the door. Miraculously, Destiny was fast asleep. All the time Autumn had spent playing with her in the car must have worn her out.
Autumn stood in the center of the room watching Grady. He put a blanket on Destiny and then turned to face her.
He didn’t say anything and Autumn wondered how long it would be before he broke the tension of the silence. She’d have said something herself, some comment on the room or the weird kid at the front desk who’d checked them in, but she felt too nervous to speak.
When Grady walked toward her, she stopped breathing. She didn’t realize she was holding her breath until she felt his strong hands on her face.
“I’ve wanted to kiss this mouth so badly it’s been driving me crazy,” he said.
Autumn tried to respond but words escaped her. She couldn’t believe what was happening. Who was this man? Strong, muscular, tattooed, rich? She felt like he’d lived a thousand lives and knew everything about everything. He’d been to all parts of the country, had been involved in all sorts of adventures, and had seen violence that she could scarcely imagine.
Compared to him she really was a child. Not just because she was younger, but because she was so much less experienced.
What was he going to do to her? She couldn’t begin to know what was coming.
He crushed his smooth, soft lips against hers and she felt butterflies in her stomach like she’d never felt them. His kiss made the rest of the world disappear. All that existed was his mouth on hers, his lips pressed against hers, the light stubble of his face against her chin, and his tongue running along her lip.
He lifted her up and carried her to the bed, his lips firmly placed on hers the entire time.
When he threw her down on the bed she felt as if the entire world was spinning. She lay there and looked up at him, her arms spread above her head and her legs hanging over the edge.
She knew what was coming and she couldn’t wait another second.
“Grady,” she said.
“Yes?”
She looked at him but couldn’t form any other words. She just giggled and he grinned back at her and pulled his shirt off over his head. His torso was so sexy, his bare chest, the muscles of his arms and shoulders, the tattoos. He was like something out of her deepest, hottest fantasies. She couldn’t believe what was happening to her and if it was a dream, she never wanted to wake up.
“You better strip right now, Autumn. Otherwise I’ll rip those clothes off you and I know you don’t have anything else to wear.”
Autumn giggled as she spoke. She couldn’t believe she was really having this conversation.
“Maybe you’d like having me naked in the car tomorrow. That way you could get whatever you liked.”
Grady laughed. “Such a naughty girl. I’d like it but I’m not sure what the state troopers would say if we caused a backup on the interstate.”
Autumn crossed her legs as if that might protect her.
Grady leaned down on the bed and put his lips on hers again. She leaned into him this time, the entire weight of his body on hers. She pressed herself against his hard body, his bare muscles, his throbbing crotch. She ran her hands down his back, all the way to the waist of his jeans, and when she reached the waist she let her fingers reach inside his pants and graze his ass.
He pulled her shirt off and she looked up at him, terrified of what he’d think of her breasts. If he had any complaints, she couldn’t see them from the look on his face. He looked into her eyes and then gazed down at her breasts. She arched her back and let him unclasp her bra. He tore it off and flung it across the room.
“Oh God,” she moaned as his mouth fell on her nipples, sucking and licking them like he was starving for her.
“Autumn,” he sighed, sucking her exquisitely.
She wrapped her legs around his waist and threw her head back as he continued licking her nipples, his tongue running in rings around them.
She began opening his jeans, unbutto
ning them and pulling off his belt. When his pants fell open she reached for his cock and for the first time, felt it beneath the cotton fabric of his shorts. She gasped when she felt the size of it in her hand for the first time.
How was that thing ever going to fit inside her body?
Grady growled when she squeezed it and she let go instantly, as if she’d just caused a wolf to growl.
He got up and pulled off his pants and shorts while she got out of the rest of her clothes. He looked at her, completely naked, and his jaw dropped. Autumn was so shy she wanted to shut her eyes but she forced them to stay open.
The way he looked at her filled her with emotion and caused her to tremble. There was a lust, a hunger in his gaze that she’d never seen before. He was going to devour her. He was going to dominate her. He was going to make her completely his.
And she couldn’t wait.
She couldn’t wait to feel the pleasure of making love to this man. She couldn’t wait to be his. She couldn’t wait to moan his name in the throes of pleasure.
He came back to her and pulled her up onto the bed so that her legs were no longer hanging over the edge. She felt a rush of anticipation. He was getting her into the position he wanted her in and she knew what it meant.
He was over her, straddling her naked body, and she looked up into his eyes as his powerful cock grazed the sensitive skin of her stomach for the first time.
“Oh God,” she whispered.
“You’ve never done this before?” he said to her softly.
She shook her head.
He smiled. “Well, try to relax. You’re going to love every second.”
She giggled, more out of nervousness than the funniness of the joke.
“But if you need me to slow down just say wait and I’ll slow right down. Got it?”
She nodded and his mouth came to her neck, kissing her passionately and sending butterflies through every part of her. From her neck, his kiss slowly moved down her body, over her breasts, over her stomach, and to the secret folds of flesh of her clit.
She’d never been touched there before, and when Grady’s lips softly passed over her she shut her eyes and clenched every muscle in anticipation. Then he started kissing her, making out with her clit like he was kissing her mouth in a passionate flurry of licking and sucking. She tightened her stomach and clenched, the pleasure entirely new and completely overwhelming.
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