He snuck up the back stairs and opened the door to his bedroom. Everything in him settled, seeing her silhouette against the French door.
Chapter Thirteen
“Rielle?”
She whirled around guiltily. She hadn’t heard Gavin enter. Right. She couldn’t hear anything over the pounding in her head. “Oh. Ah. Hey. Bet you’re wondering what I’m doing in your bedroom.”
Gavin shut the door and silently leaned against it.
“I’m sorry. There were just too many people. Too many kids. My God, what is it with the McKays? Are the women who married into the family having a contest to see who can pop out the most babies? And didn’t it seem like all the babies were screaming at one time? Guess what, they were. I timed it. There was a two minute window when no kids were yelling. Two minutes. That’s all. In the last two hours. So naturally a pause in the collective noise pollution was a signal for the adults to get louder. Laughing and chatting like they hadn’t seen each other in years, when I’m pretty sure they have some kind of crazy McKay gossip fest every couple of weeks.
“Then there were all these toddlers and school age kids running around. Climbing on the furniture like monkeys. Did the parents make the older kids go outside? No. They let those adorable, monstrous children race up and down my hallways. Up and down my stairs. Around and around my dining room table like it was a race track. All the while these kids were dropping potato chips and fruit and spilling ranch dressing on the rugs. I tried to stay out of the way and embrace the kids will be kids philosophy, but I wanted to run screaming out of my own damn house. But I couldn’t. So I came to the one place that’s always been my refuge.
“But when I got up here, I realized, this place no longer is mine. This is your private space and I’m sorry I violated it. But where am I supposed to go? So I stayed because I just needed a minute to breathe.”
Rielle placed her hands on her cheeks. Her skin was on fire. Or maybe she was having a hot flash. Better that than a panic attack. She vaguely remembered her parent’s advice about breathing techniques and visualization exercises to calm down.
Why the fuck couldn’t she remember how to calm the fuck down?
Her heart galloped and her pulse throbbed…maybe she was having a heart attack.
She grabbed the bottle of whiskey off the dresser and swallowed two huge mouthfuls before she set it back down.
That didn’t help. It just increased her feeling of burning up from the inside out.
Hot. Too hot. On fire. Can’t breathe. Skin is suffocating. Must get out of my clothes so I can get air to my skin…
Rielle unbuttoned the top two buttons on the sheer white blouse and pulled it over her head, leaving her in a floral patterned camisole and a gauzy skirt that hit below her knee.
She waited for a sense of relief to settle in.
Nada.
I need to take all my clothes off. Nothing constricting my skin.
When her fingers curled around the bottom band of the cami and she started to pull it up her torso, a hoarse male voice barked, “Jesus, Ree. Stop.”
She froze and glanced at Gavin, still plastered to the door.
Oh. My. God. In her panicked state of mind she’d started to strip in front of him; she’d forgotten he was even there. What must he think of her? Some crazy woman muttering and ripping off her clothes, sucking down his high-end booze after hijacking his bedroom to have a mental breakdown.
That’s when she started to hyperventilate for real.
Spots danced in front of her eyes and she swayed.
“Shit.” Then Gavin was right in her face, holding her upright. “Are you okay?”
She couldn’t speak.
“Rielle! Talk to me.”
“Too. Hot,” came out whisper thin.
He shook her a little. “Goddammit, what is going on?”
“Need. Air.”
He hauled her against his side and flung open the French door, dragging her onto the balcony.
She vaguely heard the door bang and hoped he hadn’t locked it, trapping them out here.
Gavin stood behind her, his strong hands firm around her upper arms, his mouth against her ear. “Breathe.”
Feeling lightheaded, she started to fall forward.
He made a grunting noise and placed her hands on the metal railing. “Hold on.”
The metal felt cool on her hands and some of the tension left her body, allowing her to sag against him.
“Huh-uh. Stay on your feet. Come on, honey. Smell that fresh mountain air? Suck it into your lungs.”
She opened her mouth and choked on the deep gulp of air.
“Through your nose. Nice and slow. That’s it.”
Rielle closed her eyes.
“Dammit, don’t hold it in. Let it out so you can take more in.”
Inhale like sipping water through a straw; exhale like you’re blowing in a lover’s ear.
Rielle didn’t know where that advice came from, but she focused on it. Practiced it. Used it. Imagined turning her head and breathing in the scent of Gavin’s skin. Then angling her mouth up to send a stream of air across his ear.
“Just like that. Good. Keep going. Breathe in slow.”
Finally, after heaven knew how long, she was breathing almost normally.
Gavin still had hold of her. But instead of having a firm grip on her biceps, his palms skated up and down her arms, a barely there touch that sent goose bumps cascading over her flesh.
She shivered.
“You’re cold. Let’s go in.”
“No.” She pressed back against him. “My breathing is better but I’m still hot. I want to stay out here.”
“Okay.”
He was a talker, so she expected he’d grill her on why he’d found a near-hysterical woman in his room.
But he didn’t. He just wordlessly stroked her. Soothed her.
No man had ever done that for her. Largely because she didn’t allow it. She was self-sufficient with a capital S.
Rielle remained against his body, her back to his chest. Gavin was solid. Not ridiculously muscle bound, but toned. His expelled breath flowed across her bare shoulder and he kept up those teasing caresses.
She tipped her head to look at him, but his eyes were squeezed shut. “Gavin?”
“Hmm?”
“I like your hands on me.”
His eyes flew open. “What?”
“I like the way you touch me.”
His fingers circled her wrists. “So it calmed you down?”
“Yes.” Her heart beat hard for an entirely different reason. “But it’s also revving me back up.”
He seemed to consider her response. “So what does that mean? Do you want me to keep on touching you?”
“Yes.”
“Like this?” His warm lips connected with the ball of her shoulder and he dragged a painstakingly slow kiss up the side of her neck, stopping at the start of her jawline. Then his breath tickled her ear. “Want me to stop?”
“No.” Rielle turned her head and nuzzled his cheek. “Please, keep going.”
His deep groan reverberated through her entire body. Then his hands landed on her hips and he slid his palms up her belly and over her rib cage while his lips and tongue tasted the skin at the base of her neck.
She felt him bump his hips forward, showing her how hard he was. For her. She wiggled her backside and he sucked in a swift breath.
Gavin pulled the stretchy cami down, exposing her breasts. Then his hands were on her, his thumbs stroking her nipples, his mouth leaving biting kisses down the slope of her shoulder.
Rielle ground her ass into his erection, her breaths short once again, her skin on fire from where his hot mouth worked her, and that heat arrowed straight between her legs.
Then he spun her and pushed her against the side of the house, his wet mouth suckling strongly on her nipples, moving back and forth, squeezing her breasts as his tongue licked and laved the tips, and driving her insane with need.
Clamp
ing her palms on his head, she stopped those deep sucks that made her breasts ache, and tilted his face up to look in his eyes. “Gavin. Please.”
“One step ahead of you.” He fished the condom out of his pocket and held it between his teeth as his fingers worked his belt. The sound of his zipper was loud in the still air. His jeans and boxers hit the pavement. He ripped open the package and rolled the latex down. His hands were on her ass and he panted, “Hang tight,” in her ear.
A little squeak escaped as Gavin picked her up and pressed her back against the siding. Rough-tipped fingers followed the curve of her ass and the backs of her thighs, then the insides of her thighs.
Gavin’s mouth was attacking her neck as he maneuvered their lower halves. He bit off, “Move the skirt.”
Rielle couldn’t think straight, but somehow she yanked the material up around her waist. Immediately something brushed over the crotch of her thong.
“Jesus, you’re wet.”
She blushed.
He jerked the tiny scrap of fabric aside and took her mouth in a hungry kiss as he steadily fed his cock inside her and stopped.
Holy shit that burned. It’d been a long time. She felt Gavin shaking and then all that hardness slipped back out fully and slammed into her again.
The fabric of her thong was stretched tight across her clit, the edge rubbing perfectly on that hot spot, so by his fifth thrust, she was coming.
Rielle came in silence as Gavin kissed her crazily. Her fingers digging into the back of his neck was the only outward change, because she’d make damn sure nothing took this moment away from her.
A few more long, deep thrusts and Gavin’s body stiffened. He broke the kiss abruptly, letting his head fall forward as a long, “Fuck,” drifted from his mouth.
Breathing hard, bodies shaking, they remained locked together. Then he sweetly pressed his lips to her temple.
If they hadn’t been so still, they might not have heard, “Dad? Are you up here?”
She squirmed to be let down in case Sierra stepped onto the balcony, but Gavin rasped, “Don’t move,” directly into her ear.
Loud knocks sounded on the bathroom door and Sierra raised her voice. “Dad? People are starting to leave. You need to come say goodbye.”
Gavin didn’t move until he heard the bedroom door slam. He carefully lowered Rielle to the ground and eased out of her body.
She sucked in a sharp breath at the sudden stab of pain and Gavin finally looked at her. Guiltily.
He broke eye contact and yanked up his jeans, which he left unzipped and unbuckled because he still had to ditch the condom. “Sorry. I have to go.”
“I heard.” Keeping her head down, she fixed her thong and straightened the layers of her skirt.
“I… We’ll… Dammit. We’ll talk about this later, okay?”
Rielle nodded.
After Gavin left the bathroom, she snuck back into the room and picked up her blouse. She checked herself in the mirror in case she ran into anyone.
Yeah, try and explain why you’re coming out of Gavin’s room looking like a train wreck.
That’d feed the McKay gossip coffers for a few weeks.
Her mouth was a little puffy. Her hair a lot unruly, but besides that she didn’t look like she’d been fucked hard and fast against the wall on her balcony.
How could the best sex of her life also be the most humiliating?
Chapter Fourteen
“I suck at sex.”
Ben stiffened at Gavin’s announcement and reined his horse to a stop. “You wanna explain that?”
This would be one of the most embarrassing discussions he’d ever had. Now that he’d brought it up, maybe he shouldn’t have. Maybe he’d freaked Ben out.
The man had been a Dom in a sex club for a decade. Chances are high he’s seen it all and done it all.
Gavin tried to get his horse to stop but the damn mare just kept moseying along.
“Gavin? Where you goin’?”
“Nowhere, but this horse won’t obey.”
Ben trotted up alongside Duchess and said sharply, “Jerk the rein back hard. She’ll think she’s in charge until you prove otherwise. Go on.”
He pulled the reins much harder than before and Duchess immediately stopped.
“See? That’s the first step of mastering her. Get her to do exactly what you want with a combination of firmness and praise.”
Gavin had a strange feeling Ben wasn’t only talking about horses. “Thanks.”
“So, back to your comment. Did some chick say you were bad in bed or something?”
“Not exactly.”
When a moment of silence passed, where Gavin couldn’t even look at Ben, Ben sighed. “You know I’m the last guy who’d pass judgment on anyone. I assume that’s why you wanna talk to me?”
Come on, Daniels, don’t be a pussy. You’ve been a pussy your whole life, which is why you haven’t gotten any pussy. Own up to all you don’t know.
“Yeah. Remember when Dalton staged that intervention after the incident at the club and I said if I ever found my balls again and started dating that I’d come to you for advice? Here I am.”
Ben gave Gavin a considering look. “I ain’t much help on dating, but sounds like it’s sex advice that you’re after anyway.”
“It is. And I have to admit, this is so far out of my comfort zone I may as well be on another planet.” He inhaled slowly. “But I’m ready to figure out a way to fix it.”
“You want my help, I’m gonna expect you to be completely honest about everything—and I mean everything, Gavin. Good shit, bad shit, the shit that you’ve kept bottled up inside, the shit you don’t think anyone will understand, the embarrassing shit. All of it.”
“I can do that.”
“Start at the beginning.”
Gavin frowned. “Of what?”
“Of your sexual history,” Ben clarified.
Seriously? Gavin wanted to ask why that was relevant, but seeing the hard set to Ben’s jaw, he decided to start talking. “This’ll probably shock a guy like you, but I’ve never been that into sex. I had my horny teen years where I thought about sex twenty-four/seven and jacked off that many times every day. Got my first girlfriend, we had sex a few times but she wasn’t that into it. Of course, at that age I never imagined it could be my lack of experience which caused that reaction in her.”
Ben chuckled.
“By then I’d started college. I focused on academics and when I wasn’t in school, I worked for my dad, learning the real estate business. Prime time for my sex drive, right? Well, I was more interested in spreadsheets than finding a girl who’d spread her legs. After I graduated, I was even more driven to prove myself. I didn’t date, didn’t do anything but work.”
“Didn’t your family encourage you to find a woman and settle down? God knows the McKays are all about that.”
Gavin shook his head. “My dad married later in life, so as far as he was concerned, I was following in his footsteps.” He paused. “Then I met Ellen at a party. This young, gorgeous woman was all over me. It’s fucking pathetic, but I’d never been the guy the women look at and say I wanna get with him because he’s so fucking fine. Ellen’s attentions were beyond flattering; she slept with me the first night we met. Then she kept coming back for more. At that point in my life, having sex with her twice a week felt like I’d hooked up with a nympho. I fell for her hard, not seeing her for the manipulative, psycho bitch she was. After dating six months, she told me she was pregnant. Even then I hadn’t known I’d been set up from the start.”
“Lemme guess. You did the right thing and married her.”
“Yes. I thought I’d had it all. A job I loved, a hot wife who loved me and was pregnant with my child.” His hands unconsciously tightened on the reins. “Before Sierra was even born Ellen demanded we buy a bigger house. I wanted to make my wife happy so I opened my wallet and she proceeded to empty it. Sounds corny, but when Sierra was born my world changed.” Gavin re
membered the instant the nurse placed the screaming and pruny-looking thing in his arms. He’d also had a moment of anger, imagining his birth mother just handing over a helpless baby to a stranger.
Focus on the here and now.
“I never doubted that Ellen loved our daughter. But from the time we brought Sierra home from the hospital, I saw Ellen had no desire to learn to be a parent. If she couldn’t deal with Sierra, she hired a babysitter or called my mom and went shopping. Then Ellen started screwing around on me. By the time Sierra was five, I’d had enough of the bullshit and lies and divorced her.”
“So how was sex after you got married and after Sierra was born?”
Gavin shrugged. “Ellen claimed exhaustion a lot, which I forgave because I was tired too, so we were having quick, no-frills sex about once a month. Then it tapered off to once every two months and then the last year, no sex at all.”
Ben cocked his head. “Did it ever occur to you to cheat?”
“No. Any sexual urges I satisfied with my hand. And it wasn’t like the ladies were propositioning me anyway.”
“So you haven’t had sex since you were with your ex?”
“I slept with a woman at a weekend conference a few years after the divorce. Then after my mom died, there was a friend I ended up with for a few months, but she stopped calling. Now I look back and I wonder if it was because the sex sucked.”
Ben held up his hand. “First off, the past is the past. None of that matters. Is there someone specific you’re lookin’ at around here that you wanna impress with your sexpertise?”
“Rielle.”
“You’re with her? Or you want to get with her?”
“We’ve been together.”
That caught Ben by surprise. “How long’s it been goin’ on?”
Gavin blushed and felt like an idiot for it. “After I moved here, things started out slow, us talking and hanging out. Then we found an excuse to touch each other. Then we were making out like crazy whenever we were alone. And the night before last…we had sex. It happened so damn fast. Too fast.”
“Did Rielle complain?”
He groaned. “No, but she’s been avoiding me, probably because it lasted like a minute.”
Gone Country: Rough Riders, Book 14 Page 11