Living With Doubt
The Regret Series
Riann C. Miller
Contents
Introduction
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Epilogue
About the Author
Acknowledgments
Also by Riann C. Miller
Meeting The Unpredictable
Living With Doubt
Copyright © 2017 Riann C. Miller
Editing by Kristen Switzer
Cover design by Jersey Girl & Co.
Formatting by Riann C. Miller
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All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products, bands, and/ or restaurants referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/ use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
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For Aaron & Mandy.
Introduction
She’s hiding from everyone…
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I don’t need a happily ever after filled with fake promises, animosity and eventually a divorce to be content. I’m living the dream…my dream, regardless of what anyone thinks of me. My meager life was perfect until a cocky football player wormed his way into my existence.
* * *
Once upon a time, I played an unconscious role in my own life, a mistake I have no plans of repeating. I pride myself with my outspoken and frequently excessive nature. It’s the consistent reminder of the person I refuse to become ever again.
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He’s the ultimate playboy…
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Life is perfect. I’ve lived and breathed football since I was a kid, and now I’m making millions playing in the NFL. I keep women around for one reason, but never the same one. The only attachments I need are family and friends but life has a bizarre way of proving a person wrong. When a concussion leaves my best-friend’s life spinning out of control, the last thing I expected was to meet an outrageous woman who leaves me begging for more.
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She lives in New York.
I live in Arizona.
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She promised me one night, but I discovered that’s not enough. Now, I need to figure out if I’m a pro off the field because I’m about to play the biggest game of my life.
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Note from the author:
Jake and Lacey’s story started in Living With Regret. Reading Living With Regret will enhance your enjoyment of Living With Doubt however, both books can be read as a standalone.
Prologue
Lacey
There are moments in your life you’ll remember more than others. Personally, I have more memories I’d rather forget than recall. However, the day I knocked on Chase Adams’s door looking for my best friend is one I won’t soon forget.
I met Jordan Taylor our freshman year at NYU. That was on the heels of her breakup with her high school sweetheart. Jordan grieved the loss of her relationship with Chase far longer than anyone expected, and there were times when her behavior was a little unnerving. Somehow, she snapped out of the haze she had been living in and started enjoying life again.
That was ten years ago.
Now I’m standing outside her ex-boyfriend’s house in Phoenix, because somehow, after an accident that occurred during a football game, he managed to wake up in a hospital bed believing the two of them are married.
Jordan’s heart is bigger than the Grand Canyon—therefore, she did the only thing she could when she received a call that Chase needed her. She dropped everything and boarded a plane. That was days ago. So I came to slap some sense into her and take her ass back home to New York.
I lift my hand, ready to knock, when the door opens on its own, leaving a god-like creature before me.
“Well, hello,” the man says. “What can I do for you, sugar?”
The man before me has extremely broad shoulders, huge arms, and towers over my fairly short frame. His sandy-blond hair is cut short. His eyes are the color of whiskey and his voice…his voice sends a tingle I haven’t felt in years through my body. I gathered all that in a matter of seconds.
“Are you capable of speaking?” His last comment causes me to shake my head and snap back to reality. I don’t drool over men—ever.
“I’m looking for Jordan.”
The corner of his mouth turns up in a potent smile. “You’re going to have to join the party then, sweetheart.” With his long beefy arm, he motions for me to step inside, which I do.
My eyes quickly scan the lavish house my friend’s ex apparently lives in. After Chase dumped Jordan, he went on to become an NFL player. By the looks of this house, I’d say he’s done pretty damn well for himself.
“Where did you say Jordan is?” I turn to find the beast of a man staring at me like I’m about to become his dinner. Based on the way his eyes continue to eat me up, long after anyone would deem acceptable, makes it clear that “shy” isn’t a word in his vocabulary.
“I didn’t. It appears Jordan and Chase went on a trip of some sort.”
I roll my eyes. Damn Jordan and her complete lack of willpower. I grab my cell phone and dial her number. She hasn’t answered in days—therefore, I’m not surprised when it goes straight to voicemail. “Jordan, stop ignoring me. If you don’t return my call soon, then I’ll get ahold of your dad.”
I take a deep breath and slowly exhale. When I turn back around, I find I’m still being watched. “And who are you?” I question as his eyes dance back and forth while a slow sensual smile takes over his gorgeous face.
I don’t date. I don’t have time in my life for a man, and when I go out looking for a way to relieve my sexual tension, I don’t choose men who have legs the size of tree trunks. But this one happens to turn me on in a way I haven’t experienced in years. If we were back in New York, I’d be willing to gi
ve him a try—just for one night.
“I’m Jake Girard.” He sticks out his hand to greet me.
When I slip my fingers into his, the hair on my arm stands to attention.
“Nice to meet you,” he drawls.
My breath gets caught in my throat as I stare at his lips.
“And you are…?” He trails off as my brain desperately tries to remember what he asked me.
“I’m Lacey Davis.”
“Well, Ms. Davis, it’s damn nice to meet you.” My eyes widen as he crosses his colossal arms over his chest.
“You must work out. A lot.”
Jake smiles as he rubs his jaw. “You really don’t know who I am?”
I step back as my eyes roam down his body once more. Nope…I would definitely remember meeting this man. I shrug, hoping I appear unimpressed. “Why would I know you?”
He studies me closely. “You’re from New York, correct?”
“Yes…”
“New York happens to have two NFL teams. Are you seriously telling me you never watch football?”
“Football?” I distractedly question.
“Yes. I’m Chase’s friend, but I’m also his teammate. I play for the Arizona Cardinals,” he proudly states, to which my mouth drops open. He’s a football player. He’s a humongous football player who thought I would recognize him from either his face or name.
“Nope…” I pop the P louder than necessary. “Never heard of you before. I guess out of the almost nine million people who live in New York, you were bound to find someone who doesn’t give a damn about football.”
He makes a sound of disbelief before giving me a subtle wink.
“Jake, who is this?”
I turn to find a sweet little lady, who looks like she’s in desperate need of a good night’s rest, watching us.
“This is Jordan’s friend Lacey.”
“Oh.” The woman’s face lights up. “How nice to meet you. I’m Donna, Chase’s mother.”
I force a smile and shake her hand. I decided years ago to hate Chase Adams and his entire family on principle alone. Hurt my friend and you’re dead to me. Probably not the best attitude to have, but it’s one I’ve mastered well.
“Where’s Jordan? I hope your son isn’t attempting to brainwash her.”
I instantly regret my comment as her smile fades.
“Sorry. You’ll have to forgive me. I met Jordan a few weeks after your son ripped her heart out and stomped it to hell before he took off to play the big man on campus. I’m a little protective of her, that’s all.”
Jake whistles under his breath. “Please, don’t sugar coat anything on our behalf.”
I almost laugh, but I force myself not to. “Believe me, that was the sugar-coated version. If I really told you what I thought of Chase, you’d probably ask me to leave, and that’s not happening without Jordan.”
I’m a bitch, plain and simple. The crazy thing no one seems to believe is I don’t actually set out to dislike anyone. Unfortunately, it comes naturally to me. “Look, I could apologize for my comment, but I would hate to lie on top of acting rude. Last I knew, Chase was some football hero living a life that didn’t include my best friend, and I’d like to keep it that way.”
“So you do keep up with football then?” Jake says with a laugh. “Everyone loves football. It’s America’s favorite pastime.”
“That’s baseball,” I challenge.
“No, it was baseball. Now it’s football.” He cocks his head to the side. “And you better not tell me you like the Mets over the Yankees.”
“What? No.” I shake my head. “I don’t watch baseball, either.” I don’t have time for anything other than work. In fact, I might have to live in my office next week just to make up the hours I missed from flying out here.
“Please, I’m begging you, tell me you’re a huge basketball fan.”
My nose turns up in disgust.
Jake sighs. “Hockey, soccer—hell, I’ll even settle for golf if it means you like an actual sport.”
I dramatically roll my eyes before shaking my head.
“You’re telling me you live in a city where you can watch professional sports year round, and you don’t like any of them?”
A booming voice interrupts our conversation. “Who the hell are you?”
The three of us glance at an older man who has a miserable expression on his face.
“This is one of Jordan’s friends,” Donna answers.
“Good, you can take her ass home.”
My shoulders tense, and my guard instantly goes up.
“Steven,” Donna snaps.
I take a quick glimpse at Jake and find him staring at the man with one brow quirked. He appears to be seconds away from rolling his eyes.
“Chase better hope he gets his ass home soon, and when he does, that troublemaker of a girl better leave him alone.”
“Excuse me?” I snap.
Donna exhales a long breath as the man she called Steven walks over to me. “You heard me. Every damn problem my son has had in his life stems back to that girl, and now more than ever, when he should be focused on his career, he’s off doing God only knows what with that brainwashing slut.”
I gasp, ready to give the man a piece of my mind, but Jake reaches out and softly places his hand on my arm.
“That’s enough,” Donna screeches. “I don’t know who the hell you are anymore.”
Listening to Donna causes some of the tension surrounding me to fade. She doesn’t only sound upset…she sounds hurt.
“His doctors said he won’t be playing ball anytime soon, so it doesn’t matter if he left for a few days,” she adds.
“He needs to be practicing. He needs to be here talking with his coach, with his team, not off taking vacations during the fucking season. Playoffs are coming up. They need him.”
“But his doctors said—”
Steven’s face turns a nasty shade of red. “I don’t give a damn what anyone said. He needs to be here with his damn team.”
I open my mouth to say something, but Jake tugs on my arm and whispers, “Let’s go to the kitchen and get a drink.”
With a deep breath, I will away my anger. Even though I have three older sisters, Jordan is by far the closest person in my life, but I can tell that anything I have to say to Chase’s father will fall on deaf ears.
“Thank you,” Jake says once we’re out of the room.
I don’t say anything, only stare at him in question.
“Steve…” Jake points to the other room and shakes his head. “Chase may never play football again, and his dad isn’t taking it very well.”
“And that gives him the right to be an asshole? Jordan is probably the best human being I know. Whatever problems Chase has, she’s not to blame.”
Jake holds his hands up in surrender. “I happen to agree with you. Steve is just having a hard time accepting the truth. I kind of get the impression Chase’s career in the NFL means more to his dad than it does to Chase. We just need to give him time.”
I start to open my mouth to argue as Jake closes the distance between us. He nearly towers over me as his dark-brown eyes gaze down into mine. I want to reach out and touch him. I want to know if his body is as hard as it looks, but I can’t—or better yet, I shouldn’t.
My body, however, feels like it’s on fire, and even though Jake’s not my type, I’d attempt to make a move on him if we were in a club. If I had a few drinks in my system, a reason to justify my foolishness. A reason to give myself one night with a man like him.
“You have the most incredible eyes.” Jake reaches for my hand and gives it a light squeeze.
My heart momentarily stops, or at least it feels that way. I enjoy sex. I enjoy what a man can do to my body, but I’ve never had this all-consuming type of reaction to someone—not even with him—and especially not with someone I just met.
“And your hair is fucking beautiful.” His other hand twists a strand of my hair between his fi
ngers.
Jake’s eyes return to mine as a smile plays on his face. I’m ready to sag into his arms, demand him to give my body what it suddenly needs.
I open my mouth, but I’m momentarily at a loss for words, and that never happens.
“Oh dear,” Donna says as she steps into the room.
I jump away from Jake, almost like he’s on fire and I’m about to get burned, which is probably close to the truth.
“Can I fix you two something to eat? I stocked Chase’s kitchen with food yesterday, so I can fix you almost anything.”
I glance back and forth between the two of them. “I’m fine. Thank you, though.”
“How about you, Jake? You’re a growing boy. You have to be hungry.”
“Thank you for the offer, ma’am, but I’m good.”
Donna starts to say something when Chase’s father starts yelling in the other room, effectively silencing her.
I rush past Donna in time to hear Steven in action again. “You don’t take off like a crazy fucking person, that’s for sure. What did she do to convince you to leave with her?”
Chase and Jordan are in the living room, standing next to the front door, and the bastard has his finger pointed directly at my best friend.
“No, it wasn’t like that,” Chase mumbles as Jordan’s face pales. Her reaction paired with this man’s anger causes me to snap.
I step closer, gaining their attention. “Why the fuck would you go on a trip with him? Huh? Seriously, I don’t get it. The only asshole on this planet that has the power to hurt you, and you just walk right back into the lion’s den and hand him a whip? Jesus, Jordan, you’re smarter than this.”
“Don’t come into my son’s home and call him an asshole, especially when she’s the problem.”
“Be quiet, old man. No one, including your precious football playing son, asked for your goddamn opinion.”
Living With Doubt (The Regret Series Book 2) Page 1