by Tijan
“What are you thinking?” His voice grew rough. His heart picked up its pace underneath my hand.
I sighed to myself. It was soft and quiet, but it was everything. It was my surrender. I closed my eyes and I stepped into him. His arms wound around my waist and then my head rested on his chest. It was right to be in his arms.
“Emma. You need to talk to me.”
I nodded, choked up now. My hand wound around his waist and formed into a fist on his waistband. As I bit my lip in a poor attempt to hold myself from jumping him, I lifted my head and gave him a fleeting smile. “I wanted to forget for the night.”
He nodded, his eyes darkened even more.
I couldn’t look away now that my eyes had connected with his. The words tumbled free now. “I wasn’t hiding from you. I was hiding from everything. I’m sorry that your men contacted you and you had to come back from Greece.”
My heart skipped a beat. He had come back for me.
I continued, stumbling over my words, “Everything is different, Carter. Nothing’s the same. Even my job changed yesterday. It’s all,” better, “different. Everything is different. I’m different. I’ve changed and I,” don’t know how to handle that, “don’t know what to do now.”
I clasped my eyes shut against my thoughts.
“Hey.” His hand skimmed up my arm to caress my cheek. “When my men called and said you had disappeared something changed in me too. I would do anything for you, Emma. I thought Dunvan found out about you and took you. I was ready to come back and start a war. When they told me you were having drinks with your co-workers, I could’ve gone back, but I didn’t. I came home. I needed to see you. I had to make sure that you were okay. You were in bed when I got home. You were sleeping. You looked so innocent. I wanted to murder Jeremy Dunvan for what he did to you.”
I shook my head. “He was hurting Mallory—”
“He hurt you too.” An alarming tone came from him. “He changed your life. For that alone I will not stop until all of his men are in the ground.”
My hands fell away from him. What was he talking about? I shook my head again. “You can’t.”
“I can,” he growled. His hand flexed against my back and he held onto me as I had with him. “When you came to me, I wanted to torture Jeremy Dunvan, but I couldn’t. You already killed him. His father won’t stop, Emma. He’s still searching for what happened to his son and they know about Mallory.”
My eyes bulged out and I bent over. I couldn’t breathe. Panic filled me.
His hand didn’t move from me. He kept me chained to him. “They know he was with a girlfriend, it’s only a matter of time before they find her.”
I gasped for breath. It wasn’t coming. Something was blocking my air.
“I can’t protect her—”
I shook my head, fully panicked now. I gasped out, “You promised me. You said that—”
He jerked me against him. His eyes drilled into mine. “I said what I needed to get you here. You never would’ve left her if I told you the truth.”
“NO!” I ripped out of his arms. Then I turned and started for the door.
“No,” he growled as he grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
I struggled against him, but he lifted me in the air. He carried me further into the room, into the shadowed corners, and he pressed me against the wall. I was trapped again. I had nowhere to go. He held me up as he had held me in the bed that first night. His legs paralyzed mine and my arms were helpless under his hold. His chest was against mine again. He lowered his head to my neck. His nostrils flared and he skimmed my skin with his lips.
I shivered as sensations flared inside of me. But no, Mallory—I tried to struggle again, but it was useless. I was melting instead.
He whispered against my neck, “You can’t go to her. You can’t, Emma.”
I whimpered. My legs started to soften.
“That man wasn’t your boyfriend.”
I shook my head, but it wasn’t a question. Another whimper left me.
“I found out who he is and where he works. I know that he works with your roommate. He loves her, doesn’t he?”
Another nod. Another submission. I groaned and my head fell against the wall. I was starting to need only him now.
Carter whispered against my neck, an edge in his voice, “That man would do anything for her. What do you think he would do if Franco’s men took her?”
Agony speared me. I already knew.
“He would give you up in a heartbeat,” he clipped out. “You know that. You know what he would do. He wouldn’t even give you a heads-up, Emma. They would take her and he would walk into Franco’s office without a second thought. And that will happen. Franco’s men knew Jeremy was with someone, they’re searching for her right now. As soon as they question her, and they will, your name will come up. If she doesn’t give you up, he will.” His hand had a cement hold on me. He was claiming me. “He will do that to make sure the woman he loves is safe. And I would do the same for you.”
My heart stopped. Had he just—I opened my eyes and saw the stark need in his.
“I have been protecting you since you were a child, Emma. I’m not going to stop now.”
It was for AJ.
My stomach dropped as I realized that. This was all for my brother. It was like he reached in and squeezed my heart. It was a painful hold that I couldn’t stop. He kept squeezing as he continued, “My men have to know where you are at every minute of the day. They’re going to come for you, Emma. It’s only a matter of time, but when they do, they’ll learn who is protecting you and it should stop them. Once they find me at your side, this becomes another matter. Franco Dunvan will take his claim to his Family Elders and they will make the decision on whether or not he can pursue retribution for his son. If they do, they’d be starting a war against me.”
I blinked back tears. I didn’t know what to think anymore. He was right, this was beyond me, but he was doing all of this for me. Then I shook my head and I cleared my throat. I had to think again. I needed to push all emotions aside. I had to focus.
I rasped out, “And what about your family?”
“What do you mean?”
I pushed him back an inch. He was a force in himself on my sensations. Already my body wanted him back again. “When Franco finds out that you’re protecting me, it’s not between him and you. Right?”
He nodded.
“And he has to go to his family for approval to come for me?” A searing pain stabbed me as I realized what they would do to me if that happened. I pushed past it. “So if he needs approval with his family, then don’t you? Doesn’t your family need to approve of you protecting me?”
His eyes softened and his hand touched my throat gently. He murmured as his thumb rubbed against me, “They already have.”
“What do you mean?”
Moving closer, he rested his forehead against mine. “I’ve been protecting you since I joined the Mauricio family. You were why I joined them in the first place.”
What? I—what? My eyes implored him for further explanation, but I couldn’t speak.
He grinned to himself and moved to press a kiss at the corner of my mouth. He didn’t move away like he had before. He stayed there and I felt his tongue brush against my mouth. “Those men were hunting you down after they killed AJ. They wanted his family wiped out. I killed them and then I went to Mauricio. Your safety was part of my condition to join his family. You will always be safe. That’s been my first priority, even over the family itself. My elders know that. Anything I do for you will always be cleared with my family.”
But—I couldn’t think. What he said—it didn’t make sense. None of it made sense. He had been protecting me this whole time? But—
He pressed a kiss to my cheek and sighed. His hand trailed down my arm in a caress. “I tried to keep you safe. I wanted you to live your life free, but when you came to me, I couldn’t allow you that freedom anymore. You have to be with me. You ha
ve to stay with me and let the men know where you are at all times. I can’t risk the chance that Franco might go against his family and take you without their approval. He’s crazy enough to do that. And if he does, if he gets through my men,” he shuddered against me. His arms tightened their hold on me. “I need you safe. I need to be able to contact you at all times.”
I nodded and flinched at the same time.
“What’s wrong?”
I couldn’t tell him. I didn’t even know. A storm erupted inside of me and as he explained more and more, the storm spread throughout me. Then I started to break down. I couldn’t understand all of it, not the fullest extent, so I clung to the bits that made sense to me. I needed to stay with him. Franco Dunvan could still come after me. I needed Carter. That made sense to me so that’s what I held onto.
“Emma.”
I looked up as some of the panic started to subside. I could breathe again. I could think. But, my heart started to thump in my chest. His hand rested there, between my breasts, and my heart doubled its pace. I choked out, “I won’t hide anymore. I understand.”
“You do?”
“Yes.”
Then he sighed and his forehead dropped back to mine.
I couldn’t leave, not even if I wanted to, but I stopped thinking there. I couldn’t think about the possibility that I was starting to not want to leave. I distracted myself and asked, “What about Mallory?”
He frowned. “What about her?”
“What do they know about her?”
He tensed again. “I have someone on the inside. He said they don’t know much about her, but they know Jeremy had a girlfriend and they’re looking for her.”
“What if he had lots of girlfriends?”
“He did, but they know there was a girl he saw on a regular basis.”
A lightbulb turned on. “Do they know her name?”
“Not yet.”
My chest tightened as he held something back, and then I knew. My heart grew heavy. “But they will, won’t they?”
He nodded. “I’m sorry, Emma.”
“How long do you think?”
He gave me a sad smile. “I don’t know. I don’t think it’ll be too much longer before they find Mallory.”
A sob hitched in my throat. “Are they going to hurt her?”
He didn’t respond.
I knew my answer.
Then he lifted me into his arms again, but this time his embrace was for comfort. He brushed some hair from my forehead. “They might let her live if she gives you up.”
I couldn’t speak. The pain was too much. For the first time, I couldn’t believe that I hoped for my roommate and best friend to stab me in the back. Then she would be safe. Jeremy wouldn’t be able to continue to hurt her anymore. I nodded. I was okay with that, if it meant she would be safe.
“Carter.”
His arms tightened around me. “Yeah?”
“Would you sleep with me?”
“Of course.” But as he carried me from the room, he didn’t go to my room. He took me to his. The sun had started to rise so his room had some light inside, but I didn’t look around. I kept my eyes closed as he placed me under the covers and slid behind me. He curled me back into his arms. “When do you have to wake up?”
“Eight o’clock.” But it didn’t matter. I never fell asleep, neither did he.
When his alarm went off an hour later, I rose from the bed and got ready for work. Carter handed me coffee and then we went to the car. He rode with me to work and squeezed my hand when we arrived. Mike, or a look-alike, opened the door for me, but I didn’t get out. I stayed in the car for another minute. No one said a word. The door was held open, waiting for me, and then as my heart sank, I started to go.
Carter pressed a kiss to the corner of my mouth before I went. A tear fell from my eye, but he brushed it away. As I left, I knew that my entire life had changed and this was the first time that I accepted it.
The rest of my week turned into a routine. I barely saw Mr. Hudson, which was fine with me, and worked almost solely with Theresa on the new project. We took our breaks and lunches together. By the end of the week she was quickly becoming a friend, which seemed like a good thing when I stopped receiving text messages from Amanda. Theresa and I went to the café for bagels one morning and Amanda was working. She never made eye contact with me and, as I watched her, I saw there were bags underneath her eyes. I wondered if something had happened to Mallory, but I couldn’t ignore Carter’s warning. There was no going back. It was best for everyone that I stepped away from my old friends, best for them and for myself.
I missed Mallory. I missed Amanda. I even missed Ben, just a little bit. There had been some good times with the four of us on the weekends, so when Theresa suggested pizza, wine, and movies at her place I was excited to go. Carter had left town for the weekend. He hadn’t told me where he was going, only that he would be back Sunday night so I wasn’t looking forward to spending it alone. I called him and relayed where I would be. He only said to make sure the men knew my plans for the evening. He had another guard added to my team. I started to realize the same men didn’t work 24 hours of the day. They switched at regular eight hour shifts, but they all looked the same. I had been calling three different guys the name of Mike. The real one had a scar on the inside of his left hand and his eyes were darker brown than the rest.
When we stopped at Theresa's building, the real Mike sat next to me.
I let out a shaky breath, trying to calm my nerves. He gave me a reassuring smile before he got out of the car.
I waited inside.
This was their routine for me. The car would stop at the back and one of the guards would get out. He would start a sweep around the building and when he cleared it, the car would pull to where I would get out. Then the guard who rode beside me would walk around to my side of the car while he did another visual sweep of the surroundings. He remained at my door while he waited for the third guard to get into place inside the building and then he would open the door for me. Once that happened, I went inside and forgot about the men.
They were always around. I never knew where they were, but they were close. Carter told me one night over dinner that he trained his men to be ghosts. They were supposed to adapt and blend into any environment; otherwise, he wouldn’t hire them for his security team. He never used them himself. When he left, he only had one man with him, named Gene. I never saw Gene, but I heard his voice a few times when he would call for Carter.
Gene was an enigma to me, but everything about Carter’s life was a mystery to me.
When Mike opened my door, I gave him a small nod in thanks and walked inside. Theresa’s doorman gave the guards a scared look, but he opened the door for me without a word. His hand trembled as he did so, and he flushed when he saw that I noticed it. I wanted to murmur my understanding, but I didn’t. I ducked my head down and followed him to the elevator. He pushed the button for Theresa’s floor and bid me a goodnight. He said that he would be announcing my arrival to her over an intercom from the front desk.
As with Mike, I gave him a nod in thanks as well, then stepped back and waited until the elevator stopped at her floor.
Theresa opened her door down the hall and stuck her head out. She waved at me. “Hey there! I’ve got a pizza on the way and two bottles of wine being chilled. I hope you like wine. I like the sweet stuff. I’m not a dry girl.”
The ball of nerves inside loosened at her easygoing laugh. As I stepped into her apartment, I was taken aback by the warmth. It was a three bedroom apartment with a simple layout.
“You want a tour?”
I flashed a grin. “I’d love one.”
“Here’s the kitchen.” She waved to the room we were standing in, with an island counter in the middle. “There’s the living room.” She had a white plush sectional sofa that curved around one corner of the room with a loveseat next to it. The wall was covered with a large flat-screen. She led the way through the
living room and opened her glass doors that led onto a large patio. “Here’s my balcony. Nothing special, but I like the view.” It was over a courtyard that was in the middle of the surrounding buildings. A pool glistened up at us.
“And here’s my bedroom.” She took two steps and opened another set of glass doors. We stepped inside to a large bedroom. She had matched her white comforter with the white couches in the living room. As she showed me her bedroom and the other two rooms used as an office and an exercise room, I noticed there were no guest bedrooms. The last stop was her public bathroom. She opened the door. “I’ve got a private bath off my room, but you can use this one. I never have guests so it’ll be like your own bathroom whenever you come over.”