BORDEN 2

by Lewis, R. J.

  A shiver wracked my body just then as I tried to visualize a naked body in the waters. For the hundredth time since I got here, the same thought swirled in my mind.

  Why is his home overlooking the river Kate died in?

  It had been a shock to me initially, and now I was just curious. Did he think of her every time he looked out? And how many times had I watched him look out in the first place?

  Dozens. I answered myself. Dozens of times.

  I frowned and shook my head. I was tired. Everything would feel normal again in the morning. I was jumping from one thought to the other, paranoia eating me on the inside sparked by that conversation in the office.

  Marcus Borden was a bad man, but I knew that already. I accepted it. I just didn’t expect to hear it.

  “What’s getting at you, doll?”

  His voice startled me. I turned around and found him standing feet away from me, looking briefly over my shoulder and then back at me. We stared at each other for a few overdrawn moments. Then he raised his brows, waiting for my response.

  “You already know,” I finally muttered.

  He didn’t flinch, or react. “You have something on your mind?” he asked me calmly. “Let it out.”

  I sighed, defeated. “Why did you make me hear all that?”

  “Would you have preferred I kept you in the dark?”

  I went to say yes, and then hesitated. I wasn’t even sure what my answer was because of course I would have wanted to know and yet…I didn’t like what I felt after knowing.

  Again, clusterfuck.

  “You’re close to me now, Emma,” he then said, his eyes searching mine. “You have to know who you’re with.”

  “And what if I don’t like who I’m with?” I blurted out without thinking.

  He went still, a flash of pain marring his face before he masked his emotions. That look alone made me want to quickly take those words back and kiss his pain away.

  “Borden –”

  “You told me you knew what you were doing when you wanted this,” he cut in.

  “That was before you admitted to murdering those men!”

  He scoffed at me. “Don’t be naïve, and don’t you fucking lie to yourself either. You always fucking knew, Emma, and deep inside it never bothered you. That was justice –”

  “Sounds more like revenge.”

  “Sometimes they’re the same.” He took a step closer to me, his eyes hard on mine. “You know you’d have walked the same path. If someone you loved was taken away viciously before their time and without reason, you’d have rained havoc on the fuckers responsible. Don’t lie to yourself. Revenge and justice work hand in hand when you want it to. Those fuckers didn’t deserve to breathe, and the streets are better for it now they’re gone. That’s justice, restoring balance in the world. Better justice than having them sit in a prison cell, getting their three square meals a day and a bed to sleep on at night.

  “Now being the personal one to put a bullet through their skulls after I knocked them around with my fists? That was my taste of revenge, and I don’t take a single second of it back. I’d do it again, and I will, when I find the people responsible for threatening the life of someone that is mine… regardless if that someone doesn’t like me.”

  Guilt filled my chest.

  “Borden,” I started contritely, “I didn’t mean that.”

  “No,” he said, shaking his head. “I know you didn’t. I get it. You’re frightened of me. You’re frightened of what I’m capable of, but you shouldn’t be. I’m not capable of hurting you. I feel too much when I’m around you. The mere thought of putting a finger on you in a way that you don’t deserve makes me sick to my stomach. You shouldn’t fear me. I’m the last human being on this earth you should fear. You gut me. You fucking turn me inside out, Emma. No harm will ever come to you by my hands. I’m simply incapable.”

  I swallowed hard at his words. I believed him. I knew in my heart he would never harm me. “In my heart I know that, but…hearing all of that tonight was overwhelming for me, Marcus.”

  He shut his eyes briefly as I spoke his name. He liked when I did it, and I didn’t do it often enough.

  “You could have told me everything without me being there,” I added.

  “No,” he disagreed. “I wanted you to witness it.”

  “Why?”

  “To give you an idea of what I do. You’re part of my world now, doll, and I’m not letting you out. Remember, I latch, and I’ve latched pretty fucking deep. I needed you to know the threat, to understand just how dangerous being with me can be. But also that I’ll go to the ends of the fucking earth to make sure nothing will happen to you. And mark my words, Emma, nothing will ever happen to you.”

  My heart squeezed in my chest. I couldn’t deny he’d done it for me. But… “You did something you didn’t want to do,” I whispered to him, blinking back tears. “You didn’t want those bikers in. You didn’t have to do it, Borden. You really didn’t.”

  He frowned and moved even closer to me. I hadn’t even realized how close to me he was until he was completely in front of me, his body nearly touching mine.

  Looking down at me, he explained, “The more people I have on my side, the better I can protect you. When you’ve got something to lose, everything changes. You’re right, I didn’t want to give them the port, but my want for you outweighs that. Can’t you see that?”

  I nodded. “Yes, I can see that now, but…”

  “But what?”

  “I guess I needed to hear it. That you care about me.”

  That you love me.

  Pressing his front against mine, he cupped my cheek, tracing his thumb along the outline of my face and to my long hair. He combed through it with his eyes pinned to the long strands running through his fingers. His warmth enveloped me, quieting my fears. I sank into him, pressing my face against his chest before he wrapped his arms around me.

  “This isn’t easy for me,” he whispered in my ear, running his fingers down my spine, leaving tingles behind. “I’ve never been in a real relationship before. I’m trying, and despite all that you heard, I’m the same dick that chased after you, that forced you to work for me, that scared off that lady-boy that thought he could pack cock gloves in his wallet like he had a chance with you. I did all that while trying to get my head wrapped around the strange addiction you are to me.”

  An addiction. I was an addiction to him, just as he was to me. It felt damn good hearing it. “Don’t forget what you did to Joel,” I murmured.

  “He was dining with a woman I wanted, and he had seedy intentions that would make you hurl on the spot. The little dick deserved what he got.”

  I didn’t want to laugh, but I couldn’t help it. I shook in his grip, stifling the sound as best I could. Pulling away, I looked up at him and saw the amusement in his eyes, but also a softness I was slowly getting used to. Like the flip of a switch, I felt better. It should have unsettled me how fast he could reverse my emotions, but I was grateful for his ability. It meant he didn’t frighten me anymore. Not in this moment, anyway. My heart didn’t care what he did. It was too busy enjoying the high of him. And maybe that was wrong, but my feelings didn’t operate on right and wrong these days.

  He dropped his head to mine and kissed me. It was another soft, heart melting kiss, one that made my body drunk on lust. His tongue darted out, lapping at mine languidly. He stole my breath away, sucking it out of me and into his lungs, kissing me deeper as the seconds passed. Then he pulled back, his chest rising and falling faster as he stared into my eyes with that look again. “Come on,” he whispered, taking my hand. “Let’s go to bed.”

  My body unwound from tonight’s events as he led me all the way there with my hand in his. Once we were inside the dark room, he let go of my hand and turned to me. He was a large silhouette in front of me, already dominating the room with his sinister presence as he trailed his eyes over me.

  “Put your arms up,” Borden softly demanded
.

  I did as I was told and he moved closer to me. With a kiss on top of my nose, he carefully peeled my top off and let it drop beside our feet. I felt his finger trail the curve of my breasts, and when he reached the middle, he dug two fingers in my bra and pulled out my concealed switchblade. I saw his devilish smirk in the dark, and he muttered, “That’s my girl,” before tossing it on the dresser nearby.

  He unclasped my bra, giving me another swift kiss, this time on the corner of my mouth before he let that too drop. He didn’t cup my breasts or touch me sexually. He simply bent down and proceeded to pull my jeans off of me. I watched him with a small, inquisitive smile.

  “What are you doing?” I asked him.

  “Stripping my woman naked,” he answered, proceeding with my underwear. “What else does it look like?”

  His hands roamed delicately down my legs, bringing the underwear to my ankles. I felt his hot breaths on my inner thigh, and for a moment he stared at my sex. I waited for him to do something, like bury his face between my legs with his hot wet mouth, grab me by the hips, or…something! Instead, he pulled away and stood back up, leaving me completely nude and…a little disappointed.

  Then he began to take his own clothes off, and it was never old seeing his bare torso, at all the tattoos and solid tan skin. His abs strained as he threw the sweater in a basket by the ensuite bathroom, and even in the darkness I could see the trail of hair leading beneath his jeans. By now, he’d have ordered me to do something, like bend over or get on my knees. He did nothing, though. As he started to unbutton his jeans, he caught my look of confusion and smiled at me.

  “I’m not doing this for sex, doll,” he told me. “Your tight little pussy needs a rest for at least another ten hours anyway.”

  “That’s not for you to decide.” Ugh, I actually sounded pouty.

  “When I pounded you silly in the shower, you grimaced because you felt some pain.”

  “I like pain.”

  He chuckled. “While that’s a fucking huge turn on, I’m still not getting us naked for sex.”

  “So why are you doing this then?” I wondered.

  “I just like the feeling of my skin pressed against yours.”

  My heart skipped a beat. I studied him in the silence that followed. Was he being sarcastic? I waited for something else, but nothing followed. He was being completely serious, and sadly that only made me want to get ravaged by him some more.

  It was purposely chilly in the room, just the way he liked it. He brought me into bed and I snuggled under the covers, my back against his front. His warmth seeped into my bones, and I sagged into the most comfortable mattress known to mankind against the warmest wall of a man.

  This felt right.

  With his arm wrapped around me, his fingers entwined in mine. For a while, it was just this. Silence, warmth, quiet breaths. It seemed almost criminal to be in bed with a naked Borden and not touch him indecently, but I liked the intimacy without the heavy touching just the same.

  “I really didn’t like that biker,” I finally murmured, my eyes opening. “I’m not sure you should trust him.”

  “What makes you so uncomfortable about Hector? The fact that he’s a cunt, or the fact he had the ability to put you at ease despite being a cunt?”

  I stilled. How did he know? He hadn’t paid attention to me once in that office after that biker came into the room.

  “I can read you better than you think, Emma,” he said, amused.

  “You weren’t even looking at me.”

  “I don’t need to.”

  “Well, anyway, he’s still a piece of crap, and you shouldn’t trust him.”

  “I don’t trust easily, but when all is said and done, Hector is a man of his word.”

  “Is this because he’s Hawke’s brother?”

  I felt him shake his head. “No, it’s partly because I’ve seen what he’s done to protect his brother.”

  “Like what?”

  Borden chuckled. “Some secrets aren’t mine to tell.”

  “Come on, I won’t say anything to anyone.”

  “You think that line is going to work on me? Has fucking me made you forget who I am?”

  “Tell me. I promise I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

  “And what do I get in return?”

  I bit my lip, considering that question before answering. “You get me crawling on my hands and knees to you. Sucking you off whenever you want it. You get to pull my hair, smack me on the ass, do unbelievably sordid things to me while I drag my nails down the back of your skull as you fuck me.”

  He groaned deep in his throat at my response, and then I felt his mouth at my ear, capturing the lobe between his teeth. I jolted in surprise before melting in him. He licked a trail from the bottom of my ear down to my shoulder and then back up again, stopping at my throat. He sucked lightly, and I let out an uneven breath, every tired part of me stirring alive. All the while, he kept his fingers entwined in mine, squeezing them gently as he tortured me with his tongue.

  Finally pulling away, he muttered, “I’m afraid I already get to do all that, babe. No deal.”

  I smiled lazily, every part of me flushed, as I breathlessly replied, “Fair enough.”

  I turned around in his arms and stared at him in the dark. His plump lips were up in a content smile, and for a few moments I traced my finger down the profile of his face, marvelling at his beauty. He loved my touch, and he briefly flickered his eyes shut, savouring it like a man that’d been deprived of an entire lifetime of affection. And he had been, I reminded myself. He’d lived a shitty life for the most part.

  I traced his profile one last time, then I ran my finger down his throat, and drew languid circles around his chest. He was solid as marble beneath my touch. I continued my lazy trek, running my finger over the bumps of his abs, and he smiled just then when I reached his happy trail.

  “You reach your destination yet?” he asked quietly.

  “Almost,” I responded almost inaudibly.

  I locked eyes with him as I journeyed that happy trail straight to his length. I wasn’t surprised to find him hard, but I was definitely surprised by the sharp breath he let out when I wrapped my hand around him. He was unusually sensitive, like us holding each other had riled him up more than all the other foreplay we’d done combined. It was hot.

  My body responded immediately. I felt aroused, felt my breasts swell and my body heat. I wanted to kiss him everywhere. I wanted my tongue swirling the tip of his cock. I wanted to eat his divine body up any way I could. I made to move down his body, to have my mouth there tasting him, when he abruptly pulled me back against the mattress.

  “No,” he told me breathlessly, moving his body halfway over mine. “I want your mouth against mine tonight.”

  He captured my lips with his, and we hungrily kissed. I felt his length against my hip and his hand between my legs. His finger teased along my folds, and I shook beneath him, moaning lightly at the sparks of pleasure he induced. The kisses turned wetter and hotter, all lips and tongue, while the rest of me buzzed with a consuming need for him to fill me. He fucked me with his mouth for what felt like forever, leaving me quaking with need beneath him before he finally settled over me.

  “Are you really ready for me, doll?” he panted against my mouth, his length skirting my entrance. “Because it’s going to be deep and slow, and I might take a while.”

  My hands dropped to his hips, and I urged him on, kissing him in response. “Yes, yes, fuck yes.”

  “Spread your legs wider,” he told me, his voice already turning urgent. “Yeah, like that.”

  I clutched him tightly as he pushed inside me. I stilled, mouth hanging open in euphoria. Always that first thrust. He filled me slowly, taking his time, pushing in all the way, that piercing rubbing me in all the right places.

  “Good?” he asked me.

  “Amazing.”

  After several moments of my walls hugging his massive length, he began to move, hitting
that sweet spot inside me. I was wrapped in all of him. His scent, his mouth, his hot breaths and warm arms. When he groaned, the sound triggered the ache in my core, driving me closer to orgasm.

  His lips turned feverish, his hand slipped beneath me, grabbing at my ass. He moved faster, pounding into me with solid, powerful thrusts. His cock was impressively hard. There wasn’t space inside of me he didn’t fill. His body betrayed his control as he shook over me. His face turned slick with sweat, his other arm, resting beside my head, strained as he moved. Tingles and warmth shot through me, coiling my insides. I dug my heels in the mattress, feeling that wave of pleasure closing in. My hands moved to his ass and I dug my fingers into him, eagerly pressing him into me for more. He moved harder and I stilled, crying out as the pleasure washed over me. He stopped moving, allowing me to relish in the feeling. My forearms ached from holding him to me so tightly.