“Fine,” Derrick and I said, turning to greet her.
“Miss Richardson, I need to speak with you.”
I gave Derrick one more smile of encouragement before I followed Mrs. Winston to a corner of the cafeteria where all the graduates were gathered.
“I read that speech you gave me at practice Wednesday,” she said, shaking her head and looking annoyed.
“What was wrong with it?” I asked. I really hadn’t expected her to read the notes I had turned in.
“It wasn’t a speech,” she said.
“Oh, I must have misunderstood you. Sorry,” I said, and smirked.
She put her finger in my face, and I took a step back. “Little girl, don’t play with me. You better not get up there and embarrass me.”
I laughed under my breath. “What are you going to do if I do?” I said. “It’s not like you can send me to detention.”
I knew she wanted to say something, but instead, she walked off and announced it was time to line up. Derrick and I took our places next to each other at the front of the line, and the graduation march began.
As we entered the auditorium, I thought back on the night Derrick and I had won All-District. I felt so happy that I was leaving school behind and getting on with my dream. I searched the crowd for my family, but there were so many people I almost gave up—until I saw the sign one of my cousins had made. I pointed it out to Derrick, and we waved.
The graduation ceremony was so boring that I wished I could sneak out. When we got to the part in the program where Derrick and I were supposed to speak, Derrick started getting really nervous and began bouncing his leg.
“Yo, Derrick, look at getting onstage like you’re about to do a rap,” I whispered. He nodded and flashed a grateful smile.
“And now it’s time to hear from our valedictorians,” Mrs. Winston said from the stage.
Derrick slowly walked to the stage, and he made it through his speech without tripping up. Finally, it was my turn.
Mrs. Winston gave me a look of warning, but I ignored her as I took the podium.
“Good evening,” I began. “Teachers, administration, family and friends and the Queens Academy’s amazing class of 2007.” I had to stop because the roar from the seniors was so loud no one could hear me. “I’m so happy to stand here and say we made it through. It’s time for us all to take things to the next level. Everybody go for yours, and don’t settle for anything less. Congratulations and good luck.”
My classmates gave me a standing ovation as I returned to my seat. Derrick just shook his head.
The rest of the ceremony was pretty much a blur, with the exception of the moment when Derrick and I actually received our diplomas. Mama was standing at the bottom of the stage to take our picture, and Mrs. Winston posed with us, like I was her favorite student. I didn’t say a word, because I knew I never had to see her again.
Afterward, we headed back to the house, where Mama had laid out a spread. There were oxtails, curried goat, rice and peas, fried chicken, macaroni and cheese and greens, all of which Derrick and I loved, along with an ice cream cake from Baskin-Robbins. I ate so much I thought I would be sick.
After Mama cut the cake, everybody took a seat in the living room.
“So what do you guys have planned for the summer?” Uncle Henry asked.
I smiled. “I have a job,” I said proudly.
“Really?” Uncle Henry said with interest.
“Yeah, I’m going to be deejaying at Twilight on the weekends.”
Uncle Henry looked at Daddy and raised an eyebrow. “Really?”
“Yeah,” I said.
“What about you, Derrick?”
“I have a job at Flushing Hospital,” he said, and Uncle Henry nodded his approval.
“An internship?” he asked.
“No, I’ll be working in the mailroom, but at least I have my foot in the door.”
Uncle Henry frowned. “Why didn’t you get an internship?”
“I thought I was too young,” Derrick said. “I didn’t find out that I could apply until about a month ago, and by then it was too late.”
“You need to be more proactive,” Uncle Henry said, and turned his head like he was dismissing him. “You know, Shawn has an internship at the White House for the summer; then she’ll be starting law school in the fall,” he said, nodding at his daughter and smirking at Daddy.
“Oh, that’s cool,” I said politely, although I really didn’t care.
“Daniel is going to London next week,” he added, smiling at his nerdy-looking son, who was a sophomore at Cornell.
After that, I tuned him out. He was always bragging on his kids, and I was tired of hearing about it. When the room grew silent, I saw it as my chance.
“Can we leave now?” I asked Mama. Some of our friends were having parties, and Derrick and I had been asked to perform at quite a few of them, but we decided not to, since we wanted to celebrate just like everyone else.
Mama nodded. We said our goodbyes and headed out after Mama shoved some money into our hands. Kyle had rented a hotel room, and a bunch of kids were spending the night. We were supposed to be partying all night long to celebrate our graduation and our independence. I’d been surprised when Mama had taken us off punishment as a graduation present. It had finally hit her that we would be leaving for college soon, so she was starting to let us go. It felt so good to be treated like an adult.
The following Thursday, I spent the day chilling, since Derrick was at work and I had the house to myself. It would be my first night deejaying at Twilight, and I wasn’t sure what to expect.
By noon, I was bored out of my mind, so I decided to call Loretta and Kyle to see what they were getting into. Loretta’s voice mail picked up, but I hung up. Her message went on for like two minutes, because she listed every way humanly possible to contact her in case it was an agent or something calling. I texted her, and she responded that she was at a photo shoot and that we could hook up later.
I called Kyle.
“Hey,” I said after he picked up. “What are you doing today?”
“Just chilling,” Kyle yelled. I could barely hear him over the thundering beats in the background.
“You want to hang out?”
“Cool.” He turned down the radio, but not by much. “Where are we going?”
“There’s a record shop in Hempstead I’ve been meaning to check out. We could go there,” I said.
“Okay,” Kyle agreed. “You driving?”
“Yeah,” I said, wondering why he even bothered to ask. Kyle drove entirely too fast for me, and if at all possible, I avoided riding with him. “I’ll pick you up in twenty minutes.”
We hung up, and I ran to my room to change out of my sweatpants and baggy T-shirt. I threw on a pair of my favorite jeans and a T-shirt with a picture of a vinyl album on the front and the words, I’D RATHER BE SCRATCHING on the back, then ran a comb through my curls. I checked my backpack to make sure I had my notebook and then I was out.
Kyle was outside tossing a football with his little brother, Tony, who had on a Batman costume, when I pulled in. Tony ran over to me, cape flying, as I got out of the car. “Hey, Jas,” he said, giving me a hug.
He was only six, and Kyle said he had a crush on me, which I thought was so cute.
“Hey, Tony,” I said, returning the hug. “You hanging out with your big brother?”
Tony nodded as he smiled, exposing his missing front teeth. “Do you want to come see my room?” he asked. “Mommy bought me some Batman sheets.”
“Okay,” I agreed. He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside, and Kyle followed.
It didn’t take that long to check out Tony’s room. The floor was covered with action figures, so I had to watch where I stepped. As we were heading back to the kitchen, we passed Kyle’s room.
“Oh, I forgot to show you the flyer,” he said. We headed into his room, and I sat in his desk chair while he booted up his computer.
“
Jas, do you want some Kool-Aid? I made it,” Tony said proudly.
“Sure,” I said as Kyle shook his head.
Tony ran out of the room.
“You shouldn’t have said yes,” Kyle said.
“Why not?” I asked.
“He put too much sugar in it.”
I leaned back in the chair. “Oh, man.”
Tony returned a few minutes later with a huge cup filled with red Kool-Aid that was sloshing over the side. “Here,” he said, thrusting the cup at me, spilling the Kool-Aid on my chair.
“Thank you,” I said. I pretended to take a gulp and accidentally swallowed some. It was horrible. “Uh, Tony, could you go get me a paper towel so I can wipe up this Kool-Aid?”
“Okay,” he said, and ran off.
I looked at Kyle and silently pleaded for help. He shook his head, grabbed the cup, then headed off, I assumed to the bathroom. He returned a few seconds before Tony, and I pretended I was just finishing the Kool-Aid. “That was really good,” I said, patting him on the head.
He handed me the paper towel, and his smile was so big I could almost see his tonsils. “Do you want some more?” he asked.
“Uh, maybe next time,” I said. “Kyle and I are getting ready to go.”
“Can I come?” He climbed onto my lap and slung an arm around my shoulder, and in that moment, I realized how much he resembled Kyle.
“Maybe next time, little man.” His eyes got glassy, like he was about to cry. “What about if I bring you something back?”
Instantly the tears faded. “Okay,” he said. “I’ll make a surprise for you while you’re gone.”
“Deal.” I stuck my hand out so he could give me five; then he ran off, yelling, “Mommy, Jas is going to buy me a surprise, and I’m going to make her something!”
Kyle showed me the flyer announcing that Derrick and I would be competing at All-City, and after I made a few suggestions, he saved the changes and printed out the new version to take with us so we could make copies.
As we were heading out the front door, Kyle’s mother appeared in the doorway of her office. She was a writer, so she worked from home, which drove Kyle crazy because she was always there.
“Hey, Jas,” she said. “I’m sorry I didn’t speak to you earlier. I’m on deadline. Where are you two going?”
“Just to hang out for a while,” Kyle said.
“Where?” his mother asked.
“Just to the record store, Ma, dang.”
She looked at him, and he shut up real fast. “You guys be careful,” she said. She walked over and tried to give Kyle a hug, but he stepped back.
“See ya, Mrs. Adams,” I said, waving.
Kyle threw up his hand but didn’t say anything.
“What was that about?” I asked once we got to the car.
“She’s just getting on my nerves,” he said. “I’ll be glad when I move on campus.”
Kyle had decided to attend New York University, which really surprised me. When we were in elementary school, he used to always talk about going to California to go to school, but once we got to high school, he stopped talking about it. Now that I thought about it, it was after his dad died of a massive heart attack our sophomore year that the dreams of California had stopped. I realized Kyle wanted to be closer to his mother than he was willing to admit. Mr. Adams had owned a chain of doughnut shops and left them all to his wife. Kyle had told me once that with all the money they still made, his mother never had to work again, and he and Tony could go to any college they wanted.
When we got to the record shop, it was pretty much empty, which didn’t really surprise me. I headed over to the sale bin to see if there was anything good, and I almost lost my mind when I flipped through and found a copy of “Rapper’s Delight.” That song was way before my time, but I still loved it, and I was excited about adding it to my collection. I found a couple more albums, then headed over to Kyle, who was busy reading a DJ magazine.
“Hey, where’d you get that?” I asked, grabbing it out of his hand.
He snatched it back. “There’s another copy over there,” he said, nodding toward the register.
I had never seen the magazine before, and I flipped through, hoping I would learn some new technique or something, but all it contained was stuff I already knew. I put the copy back.
“You ready?” I asked.
Kyle nodded. He put back his magazine, then picked up a stack of CDs.
“You’re buying all those?” I asked. He had at least twenty of them in his hands.
“Yeah,” he said, shrugging.
“Why don’t you just download them to your iPod?” I asked.
“I like having the real thing,” he said. “I can’t study the liner notes if I download a song.”
Kyle really wanted to be a producer, and he really studied his craft. He was constantly sharing information with me that I otherwise wouldn’t have known.
As I stood around waiting for the cashier to ring up Kyle’s stuff, I remembered my promise to get something for Tony.
I spotted a candy rack near the register, and as I was looking at the selection, this fine guy came and stood near me.
“Hey, aren’t you Jazzy J?” he asked.
“You know it,” I said, deciding on a pack of M&Ms for Tony. I grabbed them and turned to head back to the register.
“Yo, I caught your performance at All-District. It was tight, ma.”
“Thanks,” I said.
“Yo, can I get your number? Maybe we can hang out sometime.”
“No,” Kyle said, scaring me. I hadn’t even seen him walk up.
The guy looked from Kyle to me. “Oh, it’s like that?” he said. “Sorry, man.” He walked away without saying anything else to me.
“Why’d you do that?” I asked Kyle as I went to pay for Tony’s candy.
“Man, don’t be messing with them fools,” he said.
“Oh, what, should I be messing with someone like you?” I said, and laughed. When Kyle didn’t say anything, I looked at him. “Man, why are you trippin’?”
He just looked at me and shook his head.
By the time I’d dropped Kyle off and made it back to my house, it was almost six o’clock. I grabbed the picture Tony had painted for me and headed inside, where I found Mama and Derrick sitting in front of the television.
“Where’ve you been?” Mama asked, not bothering to look up.
“I just hung out with Kyle today,” I said. “You still coming tonight, right, Derrick?”
He looked at me and nodded. “I guess.”
“What do you mean you guess? You have to be there,” I said. “You know I’ve never performed without you.” The thought of him not having my back really had me spooked. Derrick was like my good luck charm.
He sighed. “Jas, just chill. I had a long day at work today, and I just want to relax a few minutes. I’ll go with you.”
I nodded as I took a deep breath. Suddenly I felt nervous, which was never the case before I performed. I hurried to my room and pulled out the outfit I had selected. It was a red shirt that I was going to tie in a knot once I left the house so my belly button would be exposed, a pair of fitted jeans and some Air Force Ones. I thought about rocking some really nice high-heeled shoes, but I had learned my lesson one night a couple of years ago. By the end of that night, my feet had been hurting so bad I didn’t think I would be able to walk for a week.
I made sure all my equipment was together and added my new albums to my crate of collectibles, which never left my room. The other crates I would have Derrick load in my car.
“I’m ready,” I said a few minutes later.
Derrick hadn’t moved from his spot on the sofa. I walked over to him, and he was sound asleep. I shoved him to wake him up. “Derrick,” I whined, “you’re not even dressed.”
He just lay there for a minute like he was trying to figure out where he was. “Hurry up,” I said, glancing at the clock on the cable box. “I’m going to be late.�
�� It was already six-thirty.
Derrick took a deep breath and tried to stand up. Finally he flopped back down. “Why don’t you go by yourself?” he said. “I’m tired from running around and delivering mail all day.”
My mouth dropped open as I looked at him. “You can’t be serious,” I said.
“Jas, you’ll be fine. Loretta and Kyle will be there.”
“Yeah, but they’re not you. I’ve never performed without you,” I said. “I don’t want to jinx myself. You have to come. You have to.” I grabbed his arm and pulled him up.
He looked like he wanted to say something, but he changed his mind.
“Derrick,” I said, “we’re gonna be late.”
He walked out of the room without looking at me and returned a few seconds later with one of the crates.
“Aren’t you going to change clothes?” I asked. He had on a pair of khaki pants and a white button-down, both of which were wrinkled.
He shook his head. “I wouldn’t want you to be late,” he said sarcastically.
I rolled my eyes at him. “Look, I’m sorry if I’m acting funky, but I’m just a little nervous.”
Derrick’s attitude melted almost as quickly as it had begun. In a lot of ways, he reminded me of Daddy. They both had a soft spot for me, and I knew it.
We loaded the car and took the short drive to Twilight. The place was nothing like I had expected. It was actually my first time ever being in a club, and I guess I had imagined that they were all ritzy and upscale—at least, that was the way they looked on TV.
This one smelled like stale sweat and cigarette smoke, and it was so dark I wondered how people would see each other. The furniture looked like it hadn’t been replaced in years, and there was a huge crack in the mirror behind the bar, which was not a good sign. It just made sense to me that the only way that crack could have gotten there was if someone had thrown something—or someone.
“You okay?” Derrick asked, sensing my nervousness.
“Yeah, I’m cool,” I said. I took a deep breath and looked around before rubbing my hands together. “Let’s get set up.”
Derrick and I quickly unloaded my equipment; then I went to find the manager, who had let us in.
“Is there anything else I need to do?” I asked. The club wasn’t supposed to open for another twenty minutes, and I figured people wouldn’t start showing up until an hour after that, since no one wanted to be the first to arrive.
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