The Road Without You

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The Road Without You Page 14

by H. M. Sholander


  The song switches from a fast beat to a slow, sultry rhythm, and I spin her around, not wanting to see her struggling to let me in, perfectly forming her back against my chest.

  I keep my arm around her waist and use my other hand to intertwine our fingers. I move my hips behind her. It takes her a second to move with me, but when she does, my eyes close, rolling to the back of my head. Her ass rubs against me as the rhythm of the music flows through us, binding us together.

  If she were facing me, she’d be able to see the lust written across my face.

  Her arm snakes around my neck, and I bend my head down, burying my face in her neck. She untangles her hand from mine and winds both of her hands behind my head.

  My nose runs down the length of her neck, inhaling the scent of vanilla, and I tug her body closer, trailing one hand along the curve of her body.

  God, she feels so good, wrapped around me.

  Unable to take the tension anymore, I flip her around and seal my mouth to hers before she has a chance to protest. Her mouth immediately opens for me, and I swallow her whole, not wasting a single second. Her hips rub against me, and I growl in her mouth as my hand fists in her hair.

  Her hand travels up my chest, putting space between us, as she frees her mouth from mine. Grabbing my hand, she drags me through the mob of bodies, running into several people. As they direct their scowls at me, I wince, silently apologizing for the girl latched on to my hand.

  Once we’re through the throng of people, she leads me down one of the hallways on wobbly feet, weaving us through the twists and turns. She veers right, directing us down a vacant hallway, and doesn’t stop until we’re at the very end, all alone.

  “What are you doing?” I ask her, wiping the sheen of sweat from my forehead.

  She fists my shirt, stepping closer her eyes half-mast. “What does it look like?”

  She crashes her mouth to mine before I can question her.

  She backs me against the wall and fits herself between my legs as her tongue sweeps over mine. My hands land on her ass, pulling her fully against me so that she can feel what she’s doing to me.

  As her hips move, I slink down the wall, aligning my hips with hers, giving her something to grind against. I rip my mouth away from hers, running open-mouthed kisses down her slick neck.

  “Raegan,” I murmur.

  “Yeah?” she says, sounding out of breath as little moans slip from her throat.

  It takes everything in me to stop kissing her as I study her eyes. They’re full of desire, and I commit the image to memory, never wanting to forget the hunger in her eyes as she looks up at me.

  “You’ve been drinking.” I run my hand up her arm and over her shoulder, letting it rest on her cheek.

  “So?” she breathes out, still moving against me.

  I let out a low chuckle, but it transforms to a groan as she rocks harder against me. “You’re not thinking clearly.”

  “I am.”

  I shake my head. “I won’t take advantage of you.” This isn’t how it’s going to happen because I know, when she wakes up in the morning, she’ll regret everything.

  I want more than this with her. I want all of her mornings and to hear her laughter and know I caused each of her smiles. I don’t want just this night.

  “Then, stand there and let me take advantage of you.” She presses her lips to my neck before she bites down, causing me to hiss.

  I drop my hands to her waist, keeping her still. “Why are you making this so hard?”

  I’m fighting my desire to be with her, but she deserves my self-control when her defenses are down.

  She wiggles against me, trying to escape my hold, but she gives up, her body sagging against me, like the alcohol finally caught up with her.

  I kiss her, nipping at her lips, and she twines her arms around my neck, her tongue snaking into my mouth. I love the feel of her against me. It’s like I’m finally home, her fitting against me the way no one ever has.

  I place one last lingering kiss on her lips before I rest my forehead on hers. I lift my hand to her face, cradling her cheek. When I trail my thumb across her bottom lip, her mouth parts and eyes flutter.

  “Let’s get you home,” I whisper.

  “Okay,” she relents, peeling herself off me and letting her arms fall away from my neck.

  I wrap my hand around hers, keeping her close to me as I head toward the main hallway. I glance at the beautiful girl next to me, her movements easy. “Arya probably thinks I kidnapped you.”

  Raegan turns to me and grins, her eyes barely open. I pray she can manage to walk, but I’ll carry her if I need to. She loops her free hand around my arm and leans into me as we navigate our way back to the dance floor.

  She stumbles over her feet several times, so I coax her onto my back, not wanting her to fall on the nasty floor littered with beer bottles and shot glasses.

  Her legs hook firmly around my waist as I hold her butt in my hands. People stare at me as I stalk past them, but I ignore them, only concerned with the girl who has me wrapped around her finger.

  The loud music hits me as I step back into the main room, causing me to wince as my ears adjust to the noise. I spot Arya and Graham sitting in the same booth where we left them. I head in their direction, but my feet pause when Graham sticks his tongue down Arya’s throat. Every muscle in my body constricts. He’d better not break her heart, or Raegan will never speak to me again.

  When I reach them, I clear my throat, and they split like the Red Sea.

  “I think Raegan needs to get home,” I say, squeezing her thigh.

  “What did you do to her?” Arya asks, shoving Graham out of the booth so she can escape.

  “She just had too much to drink.” I adjust her on my back, feeling her slipping.

  “Raegan,” Arya whispers, brushing her arm, “are you okay?”

  I feel her nod her head, her chin hitting my shoulder each time her head bobs up and down.

  “Uh-huh.”

  “What were you guys doing?” Graham grins, wagging his eyebrows.

  If I had a free hand, I would punch him in the arm. “Nothing.”

  His eyes move from me to Raegan. He doesn’t believe me.

  He doesn’t have to. Raegan knows what happened, and she’ll thank me in the morning for stopping her alcohol-induced actions.

  “Did you guys drive?” I ask Arya.

  “No,” she answers, keeping her eyes trained on Raegan.

  “Get an Uber,” I tell Graham.

  He pulls his phone out of his pocket as I walk ahead of him and Arya.

  My arms start to burn from holding Raegan up but not because she’s heavy. Her body has gone limp, and she isn’t supporting her weight, meaning I’m doing all the work. But I firmly hold her, not daring to let her fall.

  When we make it outside, Graham runs out in front of me, scanning the curb lined with cars. “This way,” he says, pointing to the left.

  I follow him as Arya walks in stride with me down the sidewalk.

  “When I told you about tonight, I didn’t mean for you to get her drunk.” She crosses her arms and narrows her eyes at me.

  “We were just having fun.”

  “I’m sure you were,” she mutters, walking ahead of me to the car Graham is standing next to.

  Arya opens the back door, and I slide Raegan down my back, keeping a hand on her. I deposit her in the car and scoot in after her. Arya shuts the door and races around the back of the car, hopping in on the other side. Graham slides in the front seat, and the driver pulls away from the curb.

  Raegan leans her head on my shoulder, and I wrap my arm around her, pulling her into my side. I let my fingers trail down her arm, placing a kiss to the top of her head, savoring everything about her.

  I don’t know how I got here. I never wanted this, but it seems I have no choice in the matter. Raegan has taken the small, unoccupied space in my heart, and if I let her, she’ll take the whole thing without me realizing
it.

  “You’d better not hurt her,” Arya whispers loud enough for only me to hear.

  I stroke Raegan’s hair as her breathing evens out. “I won’t.” I settle my cheek on her head. “I won’t.”

  I’m certain Raegan could hurt me a thousand times worse than I ever imagined. There’s no chance in hell I’d intentionally inflict that kind of pain on her.

  Raegan

  I crack my eyes open, letting them adjust to the light as my vision comes in focus. My head pounds against my skull, and I lift my hand to my temple, applying pressure to subdue the ache. I yank the covers over my head, sinking into my bed, not wanting to let any more sunlight reach my eyes.

  What happened last night?

  All I can remember is Jax showing up at the club. Alcohol. There was definitely alcohol, and I’m pretty sure I drank too much, considering how nauseous I feel. I clench my arm around my midsection as I curl into myself, vomit threatening to come up my throat.

  I feel Stella jump on the bed. She steps on my legs to maneuver herself around before putting all her weight on my side. I groan in protest, and she whimpers, trying to snuggle closer to me, like she can help ease the pain.

  If only.

  Knocking sounds at my door, seeming as loud as a jackhammer, and I want nothing more than to hurl my pillow at whoever is making so much noise.

  “Raegan.” Jax’s voice falls over me.

  I let out another groan. His footsteps move through the room, and I swear, the sound of a pin dropping would sound like a gun going off next to my ear.

  I wonder why he’s here, but I don’t ask, my mind too muddled to comprehend anything he will say.

  He places something on the nightstand as the bed sinks, causing me to roll toward him. A moan moves up my throat at the motion, feeling like I’m on a waterbed.

  His hand snakes under the comforter and finds my forehead. His thumb strokes my heated skin, and I relax under his touch.

  “I brought water and painkillers,” he whispers. “Come out to take them, and then I promise, you can hide from the daylight.”

  I grunt in answer, keeping my eyes shut tightly as I peek my head out from under the covers.

  “Open,” he murmurs, his thumb stroking my bottom lip.

  I do as he said, and he places two pills on my tongue.

  “Water.” He guides my hand to the glass, and I grasp it, lifting it to my mouth and taking a long gulp.

  My mouth feels like a desert, so I drink the entire glass before he takes it back, placing it on the nightstand.

  I quickly hide under the covers as his body shifts next to me. Before I comprehend what’s happening, he’s sliding next to my body, his right hand wrapping around my hip.

  “Go to sleep, Red.”

  I let myself succumb to sleep, forgetting all about how hungover I feel as Jax holds me close, protecting me from the outside world.

  I wake up for the second time, alone, except I know I didn’t fall asleep that way.

  My head is no longer throbbing, and I can tolerate the sunlight filtering in my room. I throw my hands above my head, letting them fall to my pillow, as my hair fans out around me. I stare at the popcorn ceiling and contemplate how many little bumps I can count before I give up, but I don’t.

  Instead, I try to remember what I got myself into last night. There was terrible dancing and then hot, blow-my-mind dancing. And then there was kissing. God, his kisses get better each time our lips meet.

  Stella stirs next to me, stretching her tiny body, before she props herself on my chest.

  I rub my hand down her back, stroking her fur as she watches me.

  “Stella, why do I do stupid things?” I sigh. “I can’t stay away from him, no matter how hard I try. Do you think this is life’s way of playing a joke on me?”

  Her ears perk up.

  “I mean, maybe I’m fated to fall for the same guy over and over. The charmers who dazzle me with their looks before sweeping me off my feet with words that would make any girl melt into a puddle. Then, they drop me like a stack of bricks, laughing as I crumble to the floor.”

  She licks my hand, comforting me. I think about all the ways I’ve been repeating my mistakes, wrapped up in a guy who I don’t know any better than a stranger walking down the street.

  I flip the comforter off me, burying Stella in the covers, and she barks until I fish her out and place her on the floor.

  I notice I’m wearing the same clothes from last night, which would explain why I reek of alcohol, but that could just be my rancid breath.

  I drag my feet, walking out of my room and heading down the stairs. I stop when my bare feet hit the landing. A gorgeous guy with rumpled brown hair is sitting on the couch with my laptop resting on his knees and a pencil tucked behind his ear.

  I squeeze my eyes shut and open them again, thinking my mind is playing tricks on me, but he’s still there. His focus is trained on the screen, so he doesn’t notice me gawking at him like a complete lunatic.

  Stella runs past me and jumps on the couch, landing in Jax’s lap. She sits on his hand, keeping him from typing on the keyboard, and I bite my lip, stifling a laugh, as I watch him try to move her out of his way. He relents, giving her his full attention.

  “Is your mom still asleep?” he asks her as he scratches her belly.

  She gnaws on his hand with her tiny teeth, holding him in place with her paws so she can chew on him.

  I step up to the couch, clearing my throat, and his head turns in my direction.

  “When did you get there?” he asks with a playful smile as his eyes shift between me and Stella.

  “About twenty seconds before she attacked you.” I nod in my dog’s direction, watching as she rolls around on the couch, attacking Jax’s arm.

  I move around the living room and plop on the couch opposite him, covering my still-jean-clad legs with the blanket lying on the couch.

  “What are you doing here?” I play with a loose strand on the blanket, keeping my hand occupied.

  He shuts the computer with his free hand and sets it on the coffee table. “I wanted to make sure you were okay. You crashed pretty hard before we even made it out of the club.”

  I scrunch my face, trying to remember what happened after the soul-searing kiss he planted on my lips on the dance floor. I come up empty. “And Arya?”

  “She went to work a few hours ago.”

  Oh, right. I should have known that. It is Tuesday after all. At least, I think it is.

  “What were you doing?” I point at the discarded computer.

  He runs a hand over his face. “Working on our project. I figured I could get some work done while you were recovering.” He smirks, leaning back into the couch.

  I wince, hating that I made him work alone while I nursed a hangover from hell.

  Stella lies on his lap, curling into a ball and closing her eyes.

  What am I going to do with her?

  “You could have waited for me.”

  He shrugs. “I wasn’t doing anything else.” He pets Stella’s head, and I swear I see her smile. “I actually think it’s almost done, believe it or not.”

  “No way,” I say, skeptical at his admission.

  We only worked on it together for one day. It’s not possible for it to be almost finished.

  “Yeah.” He taps the side of his head. “I’m a genius.”

  I laugh at that.

  “Don’t believe me?”

  “Not a chance.” I stretch my legs out on the couch, turning my body to face him.

  “There’s a lot you don’t know. I’m more than good looks.” He wags his eyebrows as he throws his arms on the back of the couch on either side of his head.

  “Then, tell me something, Jax Andrews.” I cross my arms. “Who are you really?”

  “Would you believe me if I told you I was Superman? Average man by day and superhero by night?”

  Stella shifts on his lap, letting out a low whimper.

  “Only
if you believe that I’m a secret warrior, capable of kicking any guy’s ass, no matter how big he is,” I counter.

  He beams, showing off his perfect teeth, as his gray eyes crinkle in the corners. “I totally believe that. Remind me never to piss you off.”

  His phone beeps from the arm of the couch, and he picks it up, staring at the screen.

  His hand grips his phone, the other hand fisting on his thigh. His shoulders tighten as he shoves his phone in his pocket, staring out ahead of him, seeming to get lost in his own world.

  I uncross my arms, and my brows dip together. “Are you okay?”

  He looks at me, his face void of emotion. He nods, but his gray eyes cloud with worry and what looks like disappointment. He scrubs a hand down his face and gives me a forced smile, nothing like what I witnessed last night. His smiles and laughter made me feel light and happy.

  The night before comes rushing back to me in one giant flood, sweeping over me before I have a chance to realize what’s happening.

  Bodies touching, hands searching, and lips meeting over and over again. My intense desire to drown in him as he escapes in me. Grinding and moaning in a vacant hallway in a busy club.

  My cheeks heat from the memory, embarrassment coating me, as I recall the way I mauled him.

  But he kept me at bay, not acting on my advances.

  I blow out a breath, thankful he didn’t oblige me last night. I guess that means he really isn’t like Travis. Because I would bet anything Travis would have screwed me in the hallway, not caring who walked by.

  I bite my lip, willing the burning on my cheeks to subside, as I remember the way Jax tasted, like fresh mint.

  I push my humiliation aside, focusing on the mysterious guy sitting on my couch. “Do, uh”—I wave my hand at the laptop—“you want to keep working?”

  “No.” He removes Stella from his lap and gets to his feet. He straightens his shirt before running a hand through his disheveled hair. “I should go.”

  I throw the blanket off me and head to the front door. “Well, okay.” I shift on my feet. “I’ll see you in class?”

  He nods as I open the door, baffled as to how our playful demeanor changed to tense in less than five seconds.

 

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