by Cee, Sammi
“Guests,” I said automatically. “Avi calls them our guests. He’s happy they come in to eat and that they trust us enough to help.”
“Yeah.” Caleb stared at me for a moment, then grinned, happily. “Yeah, I like that.”
And I like you. I kept that thought to myself, but this version of Caleb, this un-Chef Krankin, might just be more dangerous now than when he was merely invading my space.
* * *
I adjusted my backpack on my shoulder as we walked toward the building. Caleb tugged on it. “You could’ve left that at the house.”
“That’s okay. I take this everywhere I go.” Before he questioned that, I yelled out to the man and three kids walking in from the other direction. “It’s the Granger family!”
“Hey, Jasper,” the oldest boy, Joel, yelled as he ran toward me. His eight-year-old brother trailing right behind him.
“Watch for cars, guys,” Judson, the father of the three children, yelled in alarm.
“I did, Dad,” Joel yelled back right as his body slammed into mine for a hug. “Jasper, you’re okay. We were so worried about you the other night when it started sleeting.”
Adam came in from the side and slipped his arms between me and his brother to wrap around my waist. “Yeah, Dad called Avi because we wanted you to come stay at our house, but you weren’t here, and then I overheard Dad asking if anyone knew where you were—”
“That’s enough, Adam,” Judson said, cutting him off as he caught up to his kids.
“I want to hug Jasper, too,” little Megan whined from her father’s arms.
I dropped my arms down around both boys shoulders for a quick squeeze, then held my arms out to the precocious four-year-old. “Come here, sweetie.”
She leapt from her father’s arms, into mine, and if Caleb hadn’t put his hand on the small of my back, I would’ve stumbled. “Jasper. Jasper. Where were you last night? We came to see you, but you weren’t here.”
I hugged her and transferred her to my hip to address the whole family. “Aw. I’m sorry I missed you guys. Caleb let me stay at his house, and I was really tired so I slept a lot.”
The kids eyed Caleb curiously, but Judson stuck out his hand to the man. “Hi, Caleb. We haven’t met yet. I’m Judson, my kids and I are volunteers here. Thank you so much for going out in the storm the other night to get our boy.”
Color filled Caleb’s face as he shook Judson’s hand. “It was my pleasure.”
Judson smiled warmly, then dropped Caleb’s hand and gripped my bicep tightly. “You’re good, then? We were worried about you, kiddo.”
Swallowing down the emotions clogging my throat, I said, “I’m good. I’m sorry I worried you.”
“Worried Dad? We were all worried, Jasper. You’re our favorite,” Adam said as he attached himself back to my side.
“Truth,” Joel chimed in.
Judson rolled his eyes at his eleven-year-old son and bopped him on the back of the head gently. “Truth? If you have something to say, use a whole sentence, please.”
Joel hooked a thumb in his father’s direction. “Old people, am I right?” He looked to me with raised eyebrows for agreement.
Chuckling at the little family, I shook my head. “Nu-uh, my man. I’m not getting involved with this one. That’s between you and your father.”
“Alright, it’s too cold to be standing out here gabbing. Let’s get inside, kids, and see what Mr. Avi needs, okay?”
“Avi!” little Megan screamed into my ear. She choked my neck with her little arms before holding them out to her father and diving back into his. “Let’s go, Daddy. I want to see Avi. He always gives me special jobs.”
“He sure does, sweetheart.” Judson looked between Caleb and me with a grin, and I noticed the dark smudges under his eyes. As a social worker who worked hands on with abuse situations, I knew his job took a lot out of him, but he didn’t usually look so weary. “They love coming here,” he said as we all turned and started strolling toward the door. The two boys darted in before us, but since Judson was holding Megan, I decided it would have to wait until later to ask him if everything was okay.
Once inside, Judson directed his kids back to the employee lounge so they could hang up their coats; meanwhile, Caleb and I were rushed by Avi, Fisher, Jonathon, Ben, and Della, each one of them abandoning their post where they’d been finishing up getting ready to open the doors to our guests for dinner. As they all took turns hugging me close, to cover up the tears they were triggering, I teased, “Geez. What’re you all making such a fuss about?”
Ben glared at me. “Don’t you give us that, young man. You’re important to us, and an important part of how this place works.”
Della, one of my favorite people in the world, a sassy no-holds-barred woman of a certain age with gray hair and a pleasantly plump build, pulled me into her softness. “Don’t you dare make light of this,” she whispered into my ear. “We were all so worried.”
Even the normally stoic Fisher looked relieved. “This isn’t going to work for us, Jasper. We’re going to have to talk about your living arrangements. You do too much around here to—”
Caleb cleared his throat loudly, interrupting him. “He’s actually staying with me.”
Avi focused on my face with hawklike intensity. “Is that true?”
I tried not to squirm under his scrutiny. “As long as he doesn’t mind.” I glanced at Caleb self-consciously. “I’m sure someone else would, you know…”
“I’d really like you to stay. You know I have more than enough room,” he replied softly.
Everyone else in the room faded as I melted under the sincerity shining from the depths of those dark eyes. I’d heard eyes were the windows to the soul countless times in my life, and I’d always kind of thought that was crap. It was more like their overall countenance, the expression on their face, and how their eyes narrowed or widened that told you what they were thinking. In that moment, I learned how wrong I’d been. Caleb’s eyes spoke volumes, probably more than he realized.
The room jerked back to focus when I heard Della say, “Yeah, I think Jasper’s covered.”
Embarrassed, I waggled a finger between her and Ben. “So whose idea was it to park that blue monstrosity out back and fill it with blankets and snacks?”
As one, they all said, “Ben.”
Ben raised his hands in surrender. “Don’t get mad, Jasper. I know you didn’t want us interfering, but”—he pointed at Della—“this one’s worrying was driving me crazy. I didn’t have a choice but to supply you with somewhere to hide from the weather.”
Della rolled her eyes. “Don’t you listen to one word he says, Jasper. The old man was as concerned as I was. He was scheming all kinds of crazy ideas to keep you safe before he found that clunker. I just made sure it was stocked with blankets to keep you warm, and the protein bars, and water in case you were hungry.”
They all stared at me anxiously, probably waiting for my explosion. Before the other night when Caleb literally rescued me from possibly getting really sick, I would have had a tantrum. I glanced at Caleb and thought about how he didn’t apply for this job out of some great contribution to humanity, but for his own personal escape. Then I pictured how sheepish he was when he’d admitted that. Right then and there I understood that it wasn’t just wanting to keep an eye on Miss Emma and the boys—although they were important—but it was stubborn pride and shame.
“Thank you.” Various degrees of surprise appeared on their faces, and Caleb nodded his head. I didn’t know if it was finding me naked in the back seat of a car or his own recent epiphany, but it showed on his face that he understood how hard, and how necessary, it was for me to acknowledge what they’d done for me positively, instead of being an ungrateful dick and throwing it back in their faces. To dispel the heavy of the moment, I added, “Especially for those, Twinkies.”
“Twinkies? What Twinkies?” She gave Ben the stink-eye. “Did you go back out there and put Twinkies in that car after I told you n
ot to?”
We all laughed at the two besties as they continued fussing at each other, and then everyone went back to finish what they’d been doing. I walked Caleb around and introduced him to the volunteers who were here tonight, and then we walked the line after the doors opened so that I could introduce him to some of the guests who frequented the soup kitchen more nights than not.
Caleb and one of the guys I’d seen around a lot in my time on the streets shared a look and a nod of respect that I’d have to ask him about later. Then the people I’d really been waiting to see crept cautiously through the door. The sight of my quasi-family settled the restlessness that had been buzzing through my veins since the minute we left them outside the church. Miss Emma had kept her promise—as I knew she would—and as long as I stayed with Caleb, they’d come here to eat. As they passed by and we greeted them, Caleb followed my lead and didn’t let on how important they were to me. I didn’t know how he knew, but I was thankful for it. Being able to visually confirm that they were alive and unharmed, I relaxed further and took on helping Caleb learn the world that I knew like it was my job.
Chapter Eleven
Caleb
Over the last two weeks, Jasper and I had settled into a harmonious rhythm. The biggest adjustment for him had been not going in to help out at the crack of dawn every day. He’d been anxious the first week, already showered and hyped up on caffeine by the time I’d gotten up and wandered into the kitchen to make myself a cup of coffee. It had taken Fisher, Avi, and me reminding him that the reason he used to go in so early was for warmth and somewhere to go. He was at my house now, so there was no reason for that.
When he’d argued that Fisher had always gone in pretty early too, Avi had patiently explained that he’d made him start his day later, too. Apparently, Fisher’s pet project was food deliveries to shut-ins or to those who didn’t have transportation. With me taking over the kitchen, he had plenty of time for that now throughout the day.
Even Avi, being in a new relationship with his boyfriend Zachary, had changed his hours and was coming in later. As for Jasper and me, we had to show up in time to prepare for whatever meal we had planned or to bring in food deliveries from various suppliers. Jonathon had assigned other volunteers to chip in and help out with some of the things Jasper had been doing during the day.
Thankfully, Fisher had been kind enough to arrange our schedule so that we worked together since Jasper didn’t have a car and my house was too far for him to get there easily. While paying for an Uber would be an option for a normal person, Jasper was anything but. The idea of any of us paying for his transportation was abhorrent to him, which frustrated us all since he still wouldn’t let Jonathon put him on payroll. I’d once again been impressed when Fisher told me that they’d been setting aside money for Jasper for months. He may not have wanted to take it for whatever reason, but they knew he’d earned it and considered him part of the staff.
The one concession I’d given Jasper was how we spent our days off. The Takoda Soup kitchen’s expansion into the Takoda Outreach Center was important to Jasper, the guys, and all of the volunteers. In fact, it had become important to me as well. On our days off, and on mornings when Jasper really was too stir crazy to relax, we went in and helped set up the new thrift store next door. In working hands-on with the guys and hearing all the ways they wished to help the community with the extra money, my admiration for all that they were trying to accomplish grew.
At night, we came back to my house and watched movies. He understandably hadn’t seen many in the last year, so I gave him full control of the remote or he’d tell me what he was in the mood for and I’d pick. We didn’t talk about anything serious since we were both generally tired after work, but we were getting more comfortable and attuned to each other. It sometimes amazed me that in leaving Rizziono’s to get more free time, in a lot of ways, I now had less. The difference was I felt more fulfilled than I ever had in my life.
My only real issues were my undeniably growing feelings for Jasper. At the beginning of his second week staying at my house, I’d convinced him to use my home gym with me when I went in for my morning workout. My motives had been purely selfish, wanting to spend every minute with him I could, but it had backfired on me horribly. He decided to give into my prodding and showed up the next morning in gray compression shorts and a Nike tank top that said Just Do It. I had wanted to just do it alright. He’d jumped on the elliptical, and I’d practically dropped the weight I’d been holding on my foot.
The rise and fall of his legs while he worked that machine showcased the months that he’d spent walking everywhere he went. His thighs were firm and corded with muscle, the flex of his ass cheeks were a distraction, but it was the crease that materialized between the two on the downward motion that had me salivating. I wanted to grasp him in that crease and hold him against the mirror that ran the length of the wall. Since everything in my workout room was designed to face that mirror, I knew there was no way he hadn’t caught me more than once losing my focus on my workout and stopping to ogle him.
After a couple of days, I’d done what I had to in order to preserve my sanity and presented him with a few pairs of baggier workout pants, one in blue and two in red, along with shirts that actually covered his offending backside. He’d gotten mad I bought him stuff, but I told him to suck it up.
“Hey, what do you want to have for dinner tonight?” I asked him as I wiped down the prep table.
He glanced over from the stove where he was stirring the escarole soup in one of the large pots. The weather was back to being unseasonably warmer than it should be, but the night chill still cut, and when I’d suggested making soup when we were working on the meal plan for this week, he’d begged me to make this one. “Aren’t we eating here?”
I smirked in his direction. “Jasper, are you whining?”
He turned away from the stove, facing me with his hands on his hips. “There’s a reason I wanted you to make this. It’s my favorite.”
It was a bit ridiculous how happy it made me that he liked my soup so much, so to hide how pleased I felt, I said, “We’ve had it at home three times since the first time I made it for you. I think you can pass on having it here tonight.”
“But—”
“Jasper, Della’s coming in to run dinner tonight. We have a whole night off. Come on, let’s eat at home.”
“Fine.” He huffed and I knew I’d be packing up a bowl to present him with later.
“So, what do you want to eat? We could stop for something fast or I could make something.”
He didn’t say anything at first, then turned to me with his emerald eyes gleaming. “I know. Do you have the stuff for your shrimp scampi? It sucks you really can’t make it for here, but I promise you that I’ll have not one issue devouring it on behalf of everyone.”
“You want me to make you shrimp scampi?” I asked, trying to play it cool even though my inner thirteen-year-old boy was fist-pumping at the opportunity to make something special for my secret crush. It really was one of my signature dishes and as much as I didn’t want to ever come across like Chef Asshole again, I wanted to show off for Jasper in that, I really want you to like me way.
Jasper snorted. “Of course. You’re, like, an award-winning chef, who happened to insinuate that he makes an extremely good shrimp scampi.”
I wrinkled my nose. “You can say what really happened. I bragged. I was being braggy, I’m too big for my britches, let me wow you all with my culinary genius whether you leave full or not.”
Jasper set the spoon he’d been using to the side and strolled over, stopping right in front of me, and poked me in the chest. He normally seemed like he was avoiding physical contact, so I almost missed his words since my whole concentration centered on that finger. “... seriously. Just stop it. It doesn’t matter why you applied for the job. You’re here now and you’ve added several recipes that people are loving and you’re getting out there and interacting as soon as you’
re done back here. Whatever your motives were, this place has charmed you into loving it as much as the rest of us do. You’re a real asset, and we’re lucky to have you, so please, for the love of all that’s holy, stop beating yourself up.”
At the end, he jabbed unnecessarily hard, so I grabbed his smaller hand in mine, engulfing it. Big Mistake. I’d swear on a Bible in a court of law that a jolt shot straight up my arm, and then jumped right into my pants as our flesh made contact. Jasper’s eyes went big as saucers causing me to question if he felt it, too.
The sound of a throat clearing drew my attention, and Jasper jerked his hand back at the same time I dropped it, and we each took a step back from each other. Ben stood right inside the doorway doing a horrible job of hiding a smile behind his hand. Jasper shuffled nervously, avoiding eye contact with either of us before announcing that he needed something from the lounge and darting past Ben and out of the kitchen. Ben waited for him to be gone, then rubbed his hands together gleefully and said, “So, what’s going on there?”
“Where?”
Ben smirked. “Oh don’t try that with me, son. I see the way you two look at each other.”
Ben may be a volunteer and not one of the founding members of Takoda Soup Kitchen, but he was definitely the reason Takoda Outreach Center was getting its start. When he’d closed his pawn shop and thrift store at Christmas, he had donated all of his merchandise to Avi’s cause. Apparently there had been quite the Christmas miracle love story between Avi and Ben’s faithful employee Zachary, who was now setting up and would be running the thrift store. They planned on providing more meals and establishing a food pantry with the extra funds, so him calling me son...solidified the feelings I’d been having that I’d found my place and I belonged here.
Then the rest of what he said pierced me straight in the gut. “Wait. Did you say ‘two,’ as in both of us?”
Ben shook his head. “You youngsters, always missing what’s right in front of your face.”