by Trudy Stiles
“Why don’t we try to put together the first two bags tonight, and we’ll work on the rest of it throughout the week.”
I nod. “Yeah, this could take a while and it’s already dark outside.”
She rips open the first bag and dumps out the pieces. I immediately find the figures and assemble Darth Vader, Princess Leia, and Han Solo. There are a few Storm Troopers too.
Mom smiles as she begins to put together the pieces that will make up the Millennium Falcon. I play-fight with the figures. Darth Vader tries to beat up Han Solo, but Princess Leia kicks his butt.
I really enjoy these times with my mom. I just wish my dad could be here too.
Hopefully once those people get their money, he can come home, just like he said.
Sam
Past
Villanova, Pennsylvania
Age 7
“DADDY, LOOK!” I SCREAM as I’m about to jump into the deep end of the pool. He waves and his smile is huge. I know I’m going to make him so proud by finally being brave.
My feet hit the cool water first and I feel it rush through my toes and up my legs. I squeeze my nose closed as tight as I can, suck in lots of air and hold my breath. My heart is pounding as the rest of my body sinks below the surface. I kick my legs as fast as I can, trying to reach the sunlight through the water. The muffled sound of clapping hands becomes louder as my head pops out of the water and I take huge gulps of air.
“Great pencil dive, Sam!” Daddy yells from the porch. He’s surrounded by his friends from work. We’re having a party to celebrate his secretary’s retirement, and everyone loves her so much, they wanted to come and share this special day with her. Lucy is super sweet and she says she’s going to travel the world with her husband. She’s old, like fifty or sixty. I don’t know why she waited so long to follow her dream of seeing things like the Eiffel Tower and the Tower of London. Lots of towers. Kind of seems boring.
Her granddaughter, Cassie, is my age and she’s here too. She’s a really good swimmer and taught me how to jump into the deep end. Today’s the first day that I’m not wearing my swimmies.
“Woo-hoo!” Cassie says from the diving board. “It’s my turn now!”
My heart is beating fast as I try to paddle to the shallow end. My arms feel really heavy and it’s hard to keep my head above the water. My toes scrape along the bottom of the pool that is the slope leading to shallower water. I’m almost there.
“Sam, please stay in the shallow end when you don’t have your swimmies on,” my mother calls from the stairs. As soon as my feet are firmly planted on the flat surface of the shallow end, I turn and smile. “I’m okay, Mommy. See!” I throw my hands up in the air, splashing water around me. She smiles as she shakes her head and turns to pass a tray of food to one of Daddy’s friends from work.
“Cannonball!” Cassie yells from the diving board, pulling her knees to her chest. She lands in the water and doesn’t even have to hold her nose. Her eyes are open huge and she’s laughing as her face disappears beneath the waves that she just made. She doesn’t come up right away and I’m suddenly worried. Before I can say another word, I feel a cool hand wrap around my ankle and I’m underwater again, flailing and laughing.
We both surface while I cough out the water I just swallowed. “Hey! No fair. And no playing rough or your grandma will be down here before you know it,” I say to her as she pulls herself onto a large raft. It’s Mommy’s raft and is usually off limits to kids, but she’s busy with Daddy’s friends and probably won’t notice. Cassie paddles over toward me and I climb on next to her.
Our shoulders are touching on the raft. It’s really hot.
“I like your pool,” she says, covering her eyes with her arm.
“Thanks,” I say, doing the same with my own arm.
Cassie giggles and kicks her foot in the water, spraying it all over us.
“My dad is sad that your grandma isn’t going to work for him anymore. He keeps saying he doesn’t know what he’s going to do without Lucy,” I say and see Lucy and Mommy looking out from the deck.
“I know, Grammy is pretty sad, but she and Grampy have been planning their retirement for a long time. They said I can come on a road trip with them in their RV. I think they’re going to take me to Florida next summer and maybe to Maine.”
“I’m going to Disney World next month for my birthday,” I say and think about all of the fun things we’re going to do there.
“Really? Oh, I wish I could come!” Cassie whines and splashes me again. I laugh and try to shield my face from the cold water from the pool.
“I bet you’ll go there when your grandparents take you next summer.”
“Yeah, maybe.” She sighs.
We float quietly around the pool for a while. I shiver when a breeze tickles my feet. “Goosebumps!” Cassie screeches and rolls off the raft with a splash. I’m about to do the same when I notice we’ve floated into the deep end. “C’mon in, it’s so much warmer than the air.” She dives and disappears under the water.
I look up at the deck and my parents aren’t there. I see a lot of people that Daddy works with. I lean a little on the raft and see the deep water below me. Shadows from the trees make it look deeper than it really is. Cassie is now sitting all the way across the pool on the stairs and tosses her head back to sun her face. I can do this.
I lean a little further so I can easily slide off the raft when suddenly I’m under and water fills my mouth and nose. Panic sets in and I kick my feet hard, but I’m not moving. I try to yell when my head pops out of the water, but I can’t, and I go under again. My screams are muffled by the water and my arms are flailing around me. I feel like I’m attached to something—my bathing suit is tight around my back, almost choking me.
I’m kicking and pushing and nothing is happening! I can’t scream anymore because I can’t breathe. I hear noises outside the water and Cassie’s voice yelling something. I keep kicking my feet, but I’m being pulled with a weight on my back. I’m stuck!
There’s a rush of water next to me and I feel the warmth from the air on my face again. I cough up lots of water. “Samantha! Are you okay?” My father’s worried voice is booming around me as my body hits the pavement next to the pool. Pain shoots up my back and I feel something tugging at me. I feel the raft tear at my bathing suit. Coughing takes over and I roll to my side, gasping for air.
His strong arms are wrapped around me, drying me off with a towel. “Sam, talk to me.”
“I can’t—” I choke again and cough for what seems like another five minutes. My mother’s voice comes from behind me and she says, “Sam, what happened?”
I’m still trying to catch my breath when Cassie chimes in, “I didn’t see it, Mrs. Weston. One minute we were floating together on the raft, and after I jumped off and swam to the other end of the pool she was in the water. I swear I didn’t see anything!” She starts to cry, worried that she’s going to get blamed for my accident.
Tears are flowing from my cheeks now and my chest hurts really bad. “It’s okay, honey,” my mother says as I’m pulled against her chest. “You’re okay. If you can cough, you can breathe. Take it easy and try to calm down.”
Cassie’s cries mix with my own and we’re both sobbing like babies. My father’s warm voice begins to overpower our tears and I rub my cheeks.
“You’re both okay. Let’s stop the crying and figure out what happened. Sam, it looks like the raft somehow became attached to the back of your bathing suit. When you jumped off, the raft flipped and must have pinned you beneath it.” He’s rubbing my back as my sobs begin to subside.
“I told you girls that the raft was off limits,” my mother scolds us.
“It’s my fault, Mrs. Weston. I took the raft. I didn’t think it was a big deal. I’m really, really sorry.” She bursts into tears again and throws herself into her grandmother’s arms.
“Girls, take it easy. Everyone is fine. And it’s a good thing there were adults around to help you,” Lucy says, an
d she looks over at my father. I turn to put my face into his chest and he’s soaking wet.
“Daddy, I’m sorry. You ruined your outfit.” I tighten my arms around his neck and he pulls me close.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. I have plenty more clothes and these will certainly dry.”
“Ben, why don’t we get the girls inside so they can change into dry clothes too,” my mother says, and I’m lifted into the air.
Within minutes, Cassie and I are dried off and in the house. “Samantha has plenty of clothes in her room, Cassie, if you don’t have any to change into.” We follow my mother upstairs, and soon we’re in my room. The thick pink carpet beneath my toes feels so good.
“Oooh, you have the Barbie Townhouse!” Cassie exclaims as my mother quickly pulls a sundress over my shoulders. She unties my bathing suit and hands me a clean pair of Barbie underwear.
“Go finish getting changed and you and Cassie can play all you want inside for the rest of the night.” I grab my undies from her hand and march into the bathroom.
“Cassie, here is a dress for you too.”
“It’s okay, Mrs. Weston, my Grammy has my clean clothes downstairs. I’ll go get them. Be right back!” I hear Cassie run down the stairs, calling for her grandmother.
“Sam, are you okay in there?” my mom asks through the bathroom door.
“Yes.” I slowly open the door and step back into my room. “I’m sorry for not being careful, Mommy.” Tears fill my eyes again and she pulls me into a huge bear hug.
“You’re okay. That’s all that matters.” She pushes me away from her gently and places her hands on my shoulders. “Promise me something?” she says, her eyes soft but stern.
“Yes, Mommy?” I look up and feel bad that I let her down.
“Promise me that you won’t take chances like that without me or your father around. I mean, until you can swim strongly without your swimmies, you need to be supervised. Okay?”
“Okay, I promise Mommy. I’m sorry.” I throw my arms around her waist as warm tears flow down my cheeks once again.
“Hey, hey. No tears, okay? I’m proud of you for trying your best and being brave, but we want to make sure that you’re strong enough to swim on your own.”
I wipe my tears on the back of my hand and sniffle back the boogies that are about to fall out of my nose. She puts a tissue in my hand and hugs me again.
“Cassie’s a nice girl, isn’t she?” Mommy asks and leads me over to sit on my bed while I finish cleaning up my messy face.
“She sure is. I wonder how she learned to swim so good. I wish I was as strong as her.”
“I bet she started swim lessons much sooner than you. Mommy and Daddy didn’t think to get you swim lessons when you were younger and before we put in the pool. I’m going to call someone tomorrow to make sure you get stronger throughout the rest of the summer.”
I hear Cassie’s footsteps in our hallway and she’s back in my room before I know it.
“Let’s play summer vacation! How many Barbies do you have?” she asks as she pulls out the canvas storage boxes from underneath the hutch in my room.
“I don’t know. Maybe twenty or thirty?”
“I’ll leave you girls to play. I’ll come get you when dinner is ready. Have fun.” My mother kisses my forehead as she lets go of my hand.
Cassie pulls out all of my Barbie dolls and pets. “I also have the Barbie Beach House. Let me get that out of my closet.” I open my closet door and pull out the house along with a Jeep.
“This is going to be awesome!” Cassie exclaims. “Our girls will live in the city and head out to the beach on the weekends. Just like my parents.”
“Cassie, we don’t live in the city.”
“I know that, silly, but my parents are always out at our beach house in New Jersey. That’s where they are this weekend. Maybe you and I can go with them one weekend. Would you like that?”
“Oh yeah!” I say, excited.
“Cool. I love the beach. Especially the boardwalk and the rides. My favorite ride is the rollercoaster!” She stands up with one of my Barbie dolls in her hand and pretends to have her ride an imaginary rollercoaster in the middle of my room.
“I’m not sure about rollercoasters, but I do love the beach,” I say hesitantly.
“Hey, if you could jump into the deep end today, you can ride a rollercoaster.”
I smile as I begin to set up the furniture in the townhouse. The plush sectional couch barely fits on the second floor, but I make it work.
“We’ll see, Cassie.”
She leaps through the air with the doll and gives me a huge hug. “I’m so glad you’re okay, Sam! I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you.”
“I was scared, but I’m okay now.”
“You almost drowned! You were coughing up so much water I didn’t know what to do. Thank God for your Daddy. He was in the water and pulled you out so fast. He saved your life.”
“Yeah, I guess he did.” I smile.
Thank God for my Daddy.
Garrett
Present
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Age 26
“YOU CAN’T GO BACK THERE!” Our driver, and sometimes security guard, Mick’s voice booms from the front of the tour bus. The fog begins to lift as the naked body next to me shifts. “Garrett?” she asks quietly. I open my eyes and try to identify where the soft voice came from. A mess of blonde hair is draped over my chest.
Shit.
I hate when they spend the night. Her warm hand moves slowly up my thigh and I quickly push that regret aside. She could be of use one more time…
The voices in the hallway echo as my head remains glued to the pillow. Footsteps quicken, and I hear another voice coming from the front of the bus.
Heath.
“Hey, can I help you with something?” he asks the nameless stranger who seems to still be barreling toward the back of the bus. It’s a rare event anyone can get past him. He’s six foot five and easily fills the cramped hallway of the tour bus. It’s also a rare event that anyone wants to get past him, especially girls. He’s the new lead singer of Epic Fail and is also the newest obsession for the endless groupies. He’s also my biggest competition for those groupies. Dick.
I never thought I’d say or think this, but I miss Alex. He would step aside and push the girls my way. There was never any competition with Alex for the girls. His heart only ever belonged to one person. And that one person is the reason why Alex is no longer on the road with us. Well, her and the family that they’ve built together.
I groan as loud banging echoes throughout the small cabin. I groan louder as the nameless blonde wraps her hand around my—
The door flies open as a gasping Heath is pushed into the room, and another blonde falls through the door. The light blinds me, causing me to momentarily forget about the soft hand that’s vigorously pumping my shaft. Another blonde. Jackpot!
I stretch my arms over my head, feeling victorious for what’s about to happen. Take that, Heath.
Cool air breezes over me as the pumping suddenly stops. The girl in bed with me scrambles to cover herself, partially tearing the covers from me. She’s hidden under the blanket now, turned away from me, and my erection deflates. I watch Heath struggle to grab the other flailing form in the room. “Mick, I could use your help back here!” he bellows. Wimp.
“Get your fucking hands off of me,” the intruder slurs and stumbles away from him. Her glazed eyes catch mine, and she squints trying to focus on me. She looks crazy. She is crazy. But, she also looks familiar. How do I know her?
She’s unsteady, swaying in place, and I immediately notice how dirty she is. And not the kind of dirty that I like. She’s filthy. Her clothes are torn in strange places, and there is a coating of dirt and grime on her arms, causing her intricate tattoos to seem veiled and blurred. Her fingernails are misshapen and dirt is caked underneath them. I remain fixated on her atrocious appearance and immediately
get itchy just looking at her.
Mick’s hulking frame fills the small doorway, causing me to divert my eyes to him. “Venue security has already been called,” he says calmly as he pushes past Heath and lifts the drunken blonde off of her wobbly feet. How did she get past them both? She can barely stand, but her arms are windmilling through the air, trying to make contact with anything. A flask and baggie filled with what seems to be drug paraphernalia flies from her open backpack.
“Calm down,” Mick says as he grabs both of her wrists with his left hand, making it look easy.
“Dude.” I chuckle, mocking Heath’s attempts to stop her. “Way to get this under control.”
Heath ignores my jab and turns to leave the room. “You got this now?” he asks Mick, who lifts his chin to acknowledge that he does indeed ‘got this.’ He continues to maintain his control over the crazy drunk chick.
“Garrett, you need to come with me,” Drunk Girl slurs. Blondie whimpers from beneath the sheets.
“Go with you? Where?” I ask, almost mocking her. I glance toward the heap of blonde hair poking out from the covers. I’m not going anywhere. I have unfinished business here.
“I’m Sadie…” A piece of paper falls from one of her clasped hands, and I watch it fall to the floor. Suddenly, her eyes roll back into her head and her body starts convulsing. She’s limp in Mick’s arms.
“Fuck,” Mick exhales and then calls out, “Heath, get me my phone. Now.” He grabs her chin, holding her head up as drool falls from her mouth. She gags as foam begins to drip from her lips, and I wonder what the hell this girl is on.
Sadie?
“What the hell?” I ask, sitting up in bed as Blondie rolls over, tucking the covers around her body. She gasps and turns to hide her face against my chest. Drama.
Heath emerges from the doorway and hands Mick a cell phone. He stares helplessly at the convulsing heap of a girl as Mick hits his speed dial. “It’s Mick. I need medical on Epic Three. Overdose.” He disconnects the call and slides his phone into his back pocket without dropping the girl. Sadie?