We all turn to each other gob smacked at his inhuman comment. Elise reeling the most. "Did he just say what I think he said?"
Sophia try’s to play it down. "Oh come on, he didn't mean it like that."
I shake my head in exasperation as Elise pinches the ridge of her nose. Only Sophia could stick up for him being so cruel.
"And you wonder why I think he's such an asshole?" Elise scoffs.
Sophia is too quick to defend him again. "He’s not an asshole Elise that’s our dad you’re talking about."
“Soph, you would defend ‘your dad’ to your death. Do you realize any normal person would not make a comment like that? And you say he’s not an asshole?”
“No he isn’t. Just because you have this, somewhat hatred towards him, don’t try tarnish us with the same brush.”
Elise inhales deeply getting furious. They always have a little animosity between them but they have never had it out. “Have you ever asked yourself why I act this way towards him? You’ve always been too wrapped up in his world to ask about anything else. Yeah, Sophia the daddy’s girl. Sophia who thinks her dad is God! Sophia the fucking spoiled brat.”
Sophia crosses her arms laughing like Elise has gone insane. “I know what this is, jealously. Always has been.”
Elise shakes her head in amazement. “Jealous? Have you lost your fucking mind?”
Sophia points her finger accusing Elise. “You have always been jealous of mine and dad’s relationship. Ever since we were little, you’d always try make out that dad was some kind of monster.”
“Because he fucking is!” Elise loses patience.
I don’t know what to say to try defuse the situation. Maybe it has been a long time coming.
“How can you say that? He’s always done his best by you Elise, and you chuck it back in his face. You’re a cruel cold bitch. Just like mom was.”
I gasp at Sophia’s bitter harsh comment and look straight towards Elise whose body has gone stiff. She hardly ever gets angry, but right now she looks ferocious.
“I hope you choke on them words one day. The truth is, dad is the cold cruel bastard you speak of. Sophia the daddy’s girl? Oh yes, you are alright.”
Sophia recoils at the harsh remarks seeming hurt. Elise turns her back on her and heads for the front door. I follow her out.
“Elise, you Okay?”
Her smile is tight. “I’m fine. You call me if you need anything." She warns me a little teary. I nod, sucking in my bottom lip. If I speak no doubt I’ll cry.
I give her a quick but firm hug and walk back into the front room.
"Okay," Sophia asks puzzled. “What was that about?"
Is she really that stupid?
"You know exactly what that was about." I snap. She’s really grating on me.
Oh god. Mauricio is back in the living room and by the look on his face he's overheard the whole argument. He stands there in his black suit pants and white shirt thinking he’s the fucking don. His eyes flare at me with suspicion. "Have you got something to say?"
I stand up to him. I won't be intimated by him anymore.
"Yes, I do as a matter of fact. Don't you care that someone has been killed not far from here? The way you’re going on is so cold and callous. What is actually wrong with you?" I can’t keep the irritation out of my voice or the rage I feel towards him.
He looks at me patronizing, like I’m a stupid little girl.
"It wasn’t one of mine so why should I care?" He notes the disgust on my face, but I don't answer him back, the look says it all.
"Oh and by the way, welcome home Olivia." He walks out of the room, half amused, laughing quietly to himself.
My eyes burn into Sophia, my nostrils flaring in uproar. I don’t want to argue with Sophia, so I storm off instead. She pulls on my arm before I leave for my bedroom. "Olivia, don’t believe what Elise says about dad, you know he’s a good man right?” She looks at me in despair. I think maybe, she must feel a little ashamed of her father’s remarks, but then again, I don’t think she is.
"I don’t care what you say, normal people don't say things that like. He laughed at someone’s death? Even the most cold-hearted must surly feel some compassion when they hear news like this. You just can't see any wrong in your father, it's shocking.”
“That’s because he doesn’t do any wrong. I don’t blame him for being a little miserable from what has gone on with his clubs and what not. Elise has no idea what’s been going on.”
I don’t understand her defense, I really don’t. I narrow my eyes at her keeping her well informed with the irritation I feel towards her. “But you don’t see him taking it out on you do you? You have no idea how he makes me feel. I won’t be talked down to anymore. Elise understands more than you Sophia.” I throw my hands up in the air exasperated. She licks his ass so hard.
“He’s still our father Olivia. We still have to respect that.”
“He’s not my dad." I shout at her letting go of all my anger towards the situation.
She blinks out of shock but it’s the truth. I sigh shaking my head at her ignorance, and leave the room.
"What’s gotten into you?" She calls behind me.
"Just leave it." My answer is snappy as I head up into my room.
I lay resting on my bed, feeling drained. But more than most, emptiness.
I know why I feel like this. I know why I feel empty. I know why I feel the loss, the devastation.
What I don't know is, what I can do about it.
I hear a knock on my room door. I feel too exhausted to lift my head up from my pillow and I don't want to talk. I wish Sophia would leave it out but instead, she knocks again.
I throw my arms over my head and snap. "Go away Sophia."
The door opens and I look up ready to have another bitch but it's my mom. Today she looks awful, again. God her mood and dress choices recently are giving me a headache.
The women needs to sort her life out.
"Can I come in?" she asks softly.
I roll my eyes groaning. "You’re in anyway."
She ignores my comment and sits at the end of my bed. "Are you Okay?" She's wary. So she should be.
"Mom, I’m absolutely fucking fantastic."
I don't think I could have emphasized any more sarcasm into that answer. She moves up the bed towards me, her tone staying soft.
"Olivia, please don’t curse. What I wanted to say was, well, I can’t apologize enough for what happened the other day. I hope my action's wasn’t the reason to why you stayed down Elise’s. I know you might not want to talk to me right now but I came to apologize all the same, that’s all. I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you know matter what happens, but you already know that right?"
I raise my head a little from the pillow and arch my brow. "Actually mom, no I don't know that. It’s what you keep saying but not doing. All that comes out of your mouth is lies. Or is it the truth? Because I can’t tell the two apart any more. I don't think anybody in this family knows what truth is. For months now you’ve been acting strange. I’ve told you this and you won't accept it. Your mood swings are obscene."
She looks abashed and hurt, but somewhere in the middle she knows I’m right.
"It's you Olivia."
I throw my head back down exasperated, and cover my face with my hands. Here she goes again, pinning the blame on everyone else but herself.
"I’m serious don’t look like that, since you met that boy...”
"Calvin!" I shout abruptly sitting up, pointing towards her with my hands to articulate his name. “His name is Calvin and I’m not with him anymore, so have you anything else to blame? Oh, maybe it's because he's broke my heart that's the problem now? I’ve become a disruption. Like you said, how could a man like him possibly love me anyway? So yeah, in that case, I’ve been a stupid reckless little girl. You want to blame me? Go ahead if it makes you feel better, but stop bringing up how I was acting when I with Calvin because he’s gone mom
. Gone."
She pats her hair in place trying to act prim and proper. "I did not say that. I meant he was never good enough for you, and you couldn't see it."
My eyes are full of heated fury and I’m beginning to shout. "You didn’t even give him a chance." I can’t believe her audacity.
"Well, now it's over can I get my little girl back?"
"So you’re admitting you never gave him a chance?" She looks down at her hands shamefully.
"I just knew he wasn’t right for you Olivia, so no, I didn’t give him a chance."
The realization of knowing she was never going to give the man I loved the time I asked her too strikes too many emotional chords with me. I just don't get her decision. I don’t understand her reasons.
"Why?" I choke.
"Because...” She shouts, but stops mid-sentence.
"Because..." I question her uneasy. Trying to force her to tell me but she shuts me down.
"It doesn’t matter now. Anyway, me and your father have been talking..." She takes a deep breath which tells me I’m not going to like what she’s about to say, but she isn’t changing the subject again, I won't let her. I need to have this out with her once and for all.
"Because what mom?" I ask again through gritted teeth impatiently but she looks up to the ceiling sighing in aggravation.
"Why did you hate him so much?" My voice is softer this time. I need to try and get through to her, so by changing tactics I might get somewhere.
I stare at her patiently waiting, but she purses her lips and say’s nothing. She’s waiting for me to drop it. She’s testing my patience.
"You know I will get to the bottom of it." I declare when I realize she isn’t going to talk.
Her eyes narrow. "There is nothing to get to the bottom of Olivia. I have no relevant explanation to why I didn’t like him, Okay. I just didn’t, now drop it."
Oh. My. Gosh. She’s unbearable.
"Okay, I will drop it, seeing as he’s gone now. But tell me this, if you can do it without lying."
"Olivia, watch your mouth."
"How did my real dad die?"
She pales and stays silent as I continue my interrogation. "Was he murdered? Or did he die of alcohol poisoning?" Now she looks edgy.
"I...I didn’t mean what I said it was in the heat of the moment... it was the rage talking."
Does she think that will convince me? That’s her choice of explanation?
I give her one last chance, asking her slowly and clearly this time.
"How. Did. He. Die?"
"I told you.” She barks, her head shaking in fury and she stands from the bed. Whoa.
"You’re lying, who killed him?" I pressure her.
She turns her back on me trying to tell me this conversation is over, but it’s far from it. "I’m done with this." She swats her hand in midair.
"Who killed him?" I shout at the top of my voice, losing patience and it gets her attention as she springs back around to face me.
"Why do you even you care? You didn't even know him."
"I care because besides everything, whether I knew him or not, he was my dad. I’m only human mom and need to know. I don't want to be lied to anymore. Just give me something."
She closes her eyes exhaling exhausted, and for the first time, I notice tears fall down her cheeks. When she opens her tear filled eyes again she looks haunted by memories. I think she’s about to tell me, so I watch on in hope, trying to give her reassurance that it’ll be Okay. Whatever she tells me.
She opens her mouth to speak, but shuts her eyes again, then says nothing.
I give up!
"Just go mom." I breathe sighing in disappointment. She has pain engraved all over her face as she watches the way I’m acted towards her, with reason but she doesn’t explain it.
Instead she pats her hair back in place and dabs her eyes carefully.
"Your dad wants to speak with you, so could you go and see him."
Erg. "What does he want? Why can’t he ask me himself?"
"I don’t know Olivia, Okay. I don’t know." She screams at me, this time losing her temper. I watch my mom in utter disbelief as she leaves my room.
I go into a frustrated rage, throwing anything I can get my hands on in my bedroom and then fall onto my bed crying out of frustration.
Chapter Nine*
Mauricio. What the hell does he want now?
I wait a little while before going to see him and brace myself for whatever he's about to throw at me. I’m ready for it.
I walk into his office downstairs, knowing that's where he will be. That's where he spends most of his time.
I walk in and freeze at the sight of him sat in his swivel chair with my cell phone in his hand. He's casually twirling it around between his fingers.
"What are you doing with that?" I bark at him almost jumping over his desk trying desperately to retrieve it.
"Ah, Ah, Ah," He sings mocking me, moving it out of my grip. I stand back infuriated.
He’s had my phone this whole time!
"You know, it's not nice when something you love dearly is taken away from you, is it Olivia?"
I narrow my eyes at his bitterly twisted words. "What are talking about? Mom tells me you want to speak with me and now you have my cell? Where did you find it?"
He stares at my cell for a moment with a sardonic smirk across his face. He’s playing with my head before answering me.
"I wanted to ask; how was your little stay at Elise's?"
I know by the calculating tone to his voice that isn't what he wanted to see me about.
"Just get to the point." I fret with firmness, anxious to get my phone back.
He stands slowly from his chair. I watch him place my cell in the side draw on his desk.
I bite my lip refraining from screaming at him.
He moves slowly, walking around his desk to the side of me making me move out of his way. He then shows his intentions of getting up, by shutting the door.
"Now, I guess your mom has told you already about your 'real' dad?" He speaks slowly and too calmly for my liking.
"Because you would know all about it?" I sass back.
He looks at me quickly, not liking my back chat but then moves back around to his side of the desk. I think he’s keeping a safe distance. His mouth turns into a disturbing razor sharp grin when he looks back at me. "Oh, I almost forgot. We have to tell you everything right? Tip toe around you, as you’re going through a hard time?"
He says again, patronizing me. I stand glaring at him, pursing my lips, waiting for my chance to go berserk. I can feel it building up inside. I don’t care anymore. I hate this man. He’s not my father and he never will be.
"Is there point to this? Are you going to tell me what happened? Because we both know what you’re like Mauricio, don’t we?"
He turns to me losing his patience. He picks up a paper weight from his desk and throws it towards me. It narrowly misses my head smacking into the door behind me. I don’t how I managed to stand firm, but I did. His features erupt into a frenzy. His eyes turn black.
"Is there a point?" he yells, "I’ll tell you the fucking point to this you cheeky little bitch. We are going to move away. Yes that’s right, move away, whether you like it or not. I’m fed up of your antics around this house. Questioning your mom, questioning me? Who the fuck are you to question me? No one ever questions me!" He shouts loud leaning on his palms over his desk towards me.
I walk backwards until my back hits the door. My heart is thumping. I try my best not to be scared of him, but it’s so hard.
"You think you’re so smart, so clever. You think I don’t know what 'Calvin'," he emphasizes Calvin’s names like its dirt, making me wince, “is doing?"
I shake my head loosely. "I... I don't know what you’re talking about Calvin’s gone."
"Oh yes you do. You’re the intelligent one aren’t you? You know oh, so well, what happened to your father? So you think? And then there’s Calvin..
.”
He paces behind his desk rubbing his index finger along his chin like he’s calculating.
“Since he’s been on the scene things haven’t been the same around here, but clever as you are, you knew that, didn’t you? I haven’t completely found out what his game is but when I do, he will fucking no about it and so will you. But until then, I think I might just have to remind him of whose boss. I’m going to give him a small taste of what will happen if he carries on fucking with me. You know what I mean by that don’t you, Olivia?"
No!
"You leave Calvin alone, he hasn’t done anything to you." I’m half shouting half pleading with him.
What the hell has he got against Calvin? What has he done?
Please leave him alone.
Mauricio turns his head laughing at me. "Too late, I’m due to have a visitor...” He looks at his wrist watch, “Any minute now.”
I narrow my eyes at him, angry and confused. "What’s that's supposed to mean?"
"You’ll see. You know you left your cell outside the front door that night you were so drunk you couldn’t even fucking stand. What a state! So I thought I’d take care of it for you. And as it goes, it didn’t stop ringing and fucking ringing. So being the caring step father as I am, I read your texts. Every single one from Calvin." Mauricio tells me on a gut wrenching wry grin. Tears swim round my eyes. Calvin text me and he read them all? I bring my hand up to my throat. I can’t speak.
"And it would seem, he is coming to see you. Right. About. Now." He adds merciless.
Just on cue, the door bells rings.
"Who is that?" I whisper, my voice cracking up. My heart has stopped.
Please don’t be who I think it is.
Mauricio’s mouth curves into a cruel ear splitting grin.
"You’ll see."
I hear Mayra open the front door, then hear a man’s voice.
My stomach curdles when the familiar voice speaks. I bend down crouching in pain. No!
Mauricio quickly brushes past me.
"Leave him alone," I sob, “please don’t hurt him." I desperately grab onto his arm but he pushes me off. I try to make a run for it to get to the door before him but he pushes me violently out of the way. He looks down at me smirking then locks me inside his office.
Confessions and Olivia (Olivia #2) Page 9