by E. L. Todd
“Volt, this is heartbreaking.” She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed. “How do you do it?”
“I don’t know…” I really didn’t have an answer to that.
“Well, if he’s a sophomore now, he’s almost done with school. You can get him a decent score on the SAT and help him get out of his situation. In a few years, he’ll be in a better place, and this will seem like a distant nightmare.”
“True.” I just hoped I could get him a good score on the exam. If his grades reflected his skill level, then I could only assume he was failing everything. Then the score would carry even more weight.
Taylor stared at me, sympathy glowing in her stunning eyes. “How are you? Besides all of that?”
Miserable.
Confused.
Lost.
“Good. You?”
“All the kids did great on the exam, but now I’m worried that might get me into trouble.”
“How so?”
“Well, they all got As. And that’s suspicious.”
It was.
“It makes it look like the test was too easy…which it was. And now I’m afraid when they move on, they won’t be prepared. I’m afraid the kids will talk about me in the hallway and say how easy I am. The other teachers won’t respect me, and when the principal realizes that, he’ll start to reevaluate me.”
All of those were valid points. “But it’ll get the parents off your back.”
“Frankly, the parents are the least of my problems right now.”
“The principal has to deal with parents all day long. Trust me on that. The less often he sees parents about you, the more he’s going to like you. Maybe this test was too easy, but you can make the next one a little more challenging. The parents won’t be as alarmed because they know you’re fair.”
“I didn’t realize teaching was so political…”
The sky was infinite in that regard. “It’s just as political as anything else you hear about.”
“Great…”
“But again, when you’re tenured, you have a lot more freedom to run your classroom how you want. Just don’t sleep with any of the kids and you’re good.”
She narrowed her eyes on me.
I chuckled. “I’m glad that’s not your thing.”
“That’s not even funny to joke about.”
In my short teaching career, I’d never come across anything like that, thankfully. If it happened to one of my students, I would be livid. If it happened to Clay, I’d see red. And if it happened to my own son or daughter…I’d be on trial for murder. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”
She closed her folder and shoved her papers inside her bag. “Have plans tonight?”
I was hoping to spend every free hour with her. “No. You?”
“Nope.”
I wanted to invite her back to my place in the hope she would make another move on me. This time, I wouldn’t turn her down, and I would enjoy every second of those beautiful lips against mine. But I knew that was wishful thinking. Even if she did come on to me, I would have to turn her down because I knew that wasn’t what she truly wanted…but it was fun to imagine. “Can I take you out to dinner?” I immediately hated myself for wording it that way.
Taylor didn’t seem to notice anything. “I think I should take you out to dinner—and for a drink.”
There’s nothing I wanted more. “I’d love that.”
***
I forced myself not to stare at her too much over dinner. My eyes naturally wandered to her face, particularly her lips, and I needed to get a hold of myself before I freaked her out. I was coming to realize I was obsessed with her.
And I’d never been this obsessed with a woman.
“Have you moved on from the Drew incident?” She seemed to be in better spirits than she was three weeks ago. She was smiling just the way she used to, and that bubbling sense of life was bright in her eyes.
“Yeah. I’m over it.”
“Good.” I sipped my wine and returned to my new favorite hobby—staring. “He’s an idiot for letting a woman like you go.” I hated myself for the stupid shit I was blurting out, but I could never stop myself in time.
She smiled before she took her drink. “I actually started dating again.”
My heart fell into my stomach quicker than the snap of a finger, and the nausea immediately followed it. My fingers were so tense I almost shattered the glass in my hand. I wanted to flip over the table and throw a tantrum, but I managed to restrain myself. “Oh…”
“It’s actually a funny story.”
Like ha-ha funny? Or blow my brains out funny?
“I started online dating—”
“Why the hell are you doing that?” I exploded like an active volcano. My anger had been building since she mentioned dating, and now I couldn’t hold everything back. I didn’t want her to date anyone, especially random strangers she met online. “Only losers do online dating. You’re so much better than that, Taylor. I would never date someone who lowered herself to that level.”
Taylor held her glass near her face but didn’t take a drink. Her narrowed eyes showed her irritation as well as her unease. I could feel her pulling away without her actually moving.
Fuck. I’m an asshole.
She finally took a drink to mask the tension. Her eyes drifted away, growing more uncomfortable by the minute.
“I’m sorry I said all of that. I didn’t mean it. I just…” Don’t want you to date anyone but me. I want to take you home right this second and kiss you like no man ever has before. I want you to be mine forever. And I want to be yours. “I’ve had too much to drink.”
Taylor took another drink before she set her glass down. “It’s okay. I know you’ve had a stressful day.”
Only Taylor could forgive me for being such an asshole. “That’s not an excuse.”
“Really, it’s fine. Let’s just move on.”
The tension fell on the table all over again. I was determined to sabotage this relationship every chance I got. I tried pushing her away and I succeeded, but not in the way I wanted. “So…did you meet anyone online you like?” I only asked the question to be polite. I wasn’t sure if I could tolerate her answer.
“Uh…” She wrapped her fingers around the stem of her glass and stared at it. “No. I haven’t met anyone.” She took a long drink of her wine, finishing it off. “Natalie told me to give it a try, but I didn’t come across anyone I liked.”
What a relief. “Maybe it’s too soon to date anyway. Take your time. There’s no rush.”
“Yeah…maybe.” She poured herself another glass of wine.
Our natural chemistry still hadn’t returned, and I spoiled the entire evening when I lost my temper. I got upset when I thought she was dating, but I had no right to be upset. I wanted her, but I didn’t want to have her. So why would I have any right to be pissed?
At least she hadn’t met anyone she liked.
I still had time to figure this out.
Chapter Fifteen
Taylor
Sage walked me to my door at the end of the night. His hand was wrapped in mine, and he pulled me close to him, wanting our bodies to be as close to one another as possible.
Without warning, he dug one hand into my hair and pulled me closer. He rubbed his nose against mine in the sexiest way imaginable before he leaned in and gave me a fiery kiss.
It started off slow and gentle before it escalated into something deadly. I was panting into his mouth and gripping his biceps so I wouldn’t float away on my high. His kiss was almost as good as the one I had with Volt, and I suspected it would soon surpass it.
“Can I come inside?” he breathed into my mouth.
It was our second date, but we had a connection from the beginning. He was charming, funny, and oh-so-sweet. I loved everything about him. He made Drew look like a troll.
I wanted to invite him inside.
But I remembered everything that happened with Drew. We moved
way too fast, and as a result, I got my heart broken. I thought Sage was different, and that’s why I wanted to make sure I didn’t sabotage it with a hasty decision. “I would love that…but maybe we should get to know each other better.”
Instead of being disappointed, he gave me a gentle kiss. “Whatever you want, sweetheart.”
Now I liked him even more.
He pulled me in for a hug and held me that way for a long time. “Never knew I would be happy about being stood up.”
“Me neither.”
He kissed me on the temple as he pulled away. “Are you free on Friday?”
“Yeah.”
“Have dinner with me.”
He didn’t need to ask twice. “I’d love to.”
“Great. I’ll see you then.” He gave me a kiss good-bye before he walked away.
I watched him go until he turned down the hall, treasuring the sight of his nice ass the entire way.
I walked inside and immediately called Natalie.
“How’d it go?” She insisted that I call the second the date ended.
“Great. Really great.”
“You managed to say no to a sleepover?”
“Yeah…and it was hard.”
“Good for you. I’m sure that wasn’t easy.”
I plopped down into the chair and realized I already missed him. “I really like him, Nat.”
“I can tell.”
“I think this could go somewhere. And he seems to really like me too.”
“Why wouldn’t he?” she asked. “You’re perfect.”
I rolled my eyes.
“When is Volt gonna meet him?”
I held back the laugh that tried to escape my throat. “Never. I’m not telling Volt about this.”
“Why not? I thought he was your best friend.”
I remembered that awful conversation we had just a few days ago. “I started to tell him the story, and I began with the blind date part and he flipped out on me…more than I thought he would.”
“Really? Why is that guy so judgmental when it comes to you?”
“I don’t have a clue.”
“Well, he’s going to find out eventually.”
“I know he will. But at least I don’t have to tell him.” And deal with his shit afterward.
“Gotcha.”
“Well, I should go. I need to call Sara and tell her everything I just told you.”
“You called me first? Aww.”
“But she’s not going to know that.”
“Or maybe you did call her first, but you’re just playing me…”
“Hmm… I guess you’ll never know.”
She laughed. “Such a player.”
Chapter Sixteen
Volt
Derek ran down the court and dribbled the ball past me.
I faked to the right then darted to the left, stealing the ball right from underneath his fingers. I charged down the court and made a slam dunk into the net.
It was nothing but air.
“Traveling!” Derek yelled.
“Was not traveling,” I argued.
“You so were,” Derek argued.
“I thought it was clean,” Jared said.
“Oh, shut up.” Derek rolled his eyes then retrieved the ball.
“I’m done.” Jared wiped his face with his t-shirt, removing the sweat and dirt.
“I think I’m done too.” I sat on the bench and downed my water bottle. It was an unusually hot day in the city for this time of year.
“If anyone asks, I won.” Derek spun the ball on his finger for a second before he lost his balance and dropped it.
“We weren’t keeping score.” I squirted water in my face to cool off.
“Well, I was,” Derek said.
He was a sore loser, so I let it go.
Jared sat beside me on the bench. “So…is Natalie still seeing that guy?”
The question came out of thin air, and it was so jarring, I actually looked at him. Did he suddenly have a thing for Natalie? Because he hadn’t noticed her once for the past five years. Why did he notice her now?
“Yeah,” Derek answered. “She and Taylor went on a double date last night.”
Say what?
“They did?” Jared asked. “How did it go?”
Wait, hold on. Taylor told me she wasn’t seeing anyone.
“Natalie likes her date, but I guess Taylor is totally enamored by this guy she met,” Derek said. “They were both on blind dates that didn’t show up, so they hooked up instead.”
Hooked up? “How long has this been going on?”
Derek shrugged. “I don’t know. Two weeks?”
Fuck.
Jared watched me. “You okay, man? You look sick.”
I ignored his question. Taylor was already dating someone while I sat around and tried to figure out what the hell I wanted. Now that I knew she was already being wooed by some other guy the second she got out of a relationship, I realized how much time I had wasted. I could have swooped in before anyone else had a chance.
I had the perfect opportunity.
But I blew it because I was too stubborn and stupid.
I wasn’t ready to be in a relationship, not after the way I was betrayed. But I couldn’t let Taylor walk away. I couldn’t lose out on the chance to be with someone I was so fond of. She was my best friend, the only person who had stepped into my inner circle so fluidly. She was special.
I couldn’t let her go.
I had to do something before it was too late.
***
I didn’t stop to shower and change my clothes. I went exactly as I was, in a sweaty t-shirt and basketball shorts. My palms were covered with dirt, and lines of sweat streaked down my forearms.
But I didn’t have time to mess around.
I knocked on her door but didn’t get an answer. So I rang the doorbell a few times and became the most obnoxious person on the planet. She still didn’t answer, so I rang the doorbell once more for good measure.
I had to accept the fact she wasn’t home.
Now I didn’t know what to do.
It was getting late so she should head home soon. She wasn’t out with me, so she must be out with whoever this dreamy guy was.
Or she might be staying at his place.
The thought made me sick.
I paced in front of her door so I had something to do. It was impossible for me to stand still for even a second. My heart was pounding painfully in my chest, and I could hardly catch my breath.
I had to fix this.
If I just told her how I felt from the beginning, I wouldn’t be in this situation. When I kissed her on my bed, there was more chemistry there than the damn periodic table. It was an explosion of feeling. There was no way she didn’t feel it too.
I knew she was attracted to me when we first met, and once romance was off the table, we became friends. So, I did have a chance. If I offered to give her more than just one night, she might take it.
But I was an ass to her.
Would she ever want to be with me after I insulted her? Would she want to be with me after I waited so long to figure out how I felt? Would she want me after I spent most of my life as a manwhore?
Was I good enough for her?
The elevator opened, and voices echoed down the hallway. I knew exactly whom they belonged to without even seeing them. Taylor and her date headed right my way, whispering to one another like longtime lovers.
Fuck.
Taylor spotted me by the door, and she immediately dropped the guy’s hand.
I didn’t look at her. I looked at him.
He was my height with dark brown hair. He clearly hit the gym several times a week, and he dressed to impress. Confidence radiated from his body in waves. I could feel his immediate dislike for me the second he laid eyes on me, some stranger standing outside Taylor’s door.
I didn’t like him.
I didn’t like the fact he was good-looking.
I did
n’t like the fact he wasn’t afraid of me.
I didn’t like the fact he grabbed Taylor’s hand again when she purposely dropped it.
And I didn’t like the fact he was a threat.
Taylor immediately came to me, concern written all over her face. “Volt? Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I just…wanted to talk.”
“About?” she asked.
“Can we talk inside?” Away from this asshole.
“Uh…” She glanced at her date before she turned back to me. “I’m kind of on a date right now. Can it wait?”
“No.” It couldn’t wait another second.
“Um, alright.” She turned to her date and lowered her voice. “I’m sorry about this. Can I call you tomorrow?”
A scowl was still on his face. “Are you going to introduce me?”
“Oh, I’m sorry.” Taylor turned to me. “Sage, this is my friend, Volt. Volt, this is my friend, Sage.”
She didn’t call him her boyfriend—and that was music to my ears.
He extended his hand to shake mine. “Nice to meet you.” He gripped my hand firmly, threatening me.
I did the same back to him. “You too.”
We both pulled our hands away quickly.
Sage turned to Taylor and gave her a kiss. “Call me tomorrow.”
“I will.” She kissed him back.
And I wanted to die.
Sage walked down the hallway and didn’t look back until he got into the elevator. The doors closed, and he was finally hidden from view.
Taylor got the door unlocked and walked inside.
I followed behind her. “Look, I—”
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about him.” She tossed her clutch on the table. “But when I brought up the online dating thing, you got hostile with me. And when I was dating Drew, you were an ass about him every step of the way. I just didn’t want to deal with it.” She blurted everything out a million miles an hour until she was out of breath.
Her face was contorted with stress, and somehow, I thought she looked beautiful. I always thought she looked beautiful. “You had every right to feel that way, Taylor. I was an ass. I don’t blame you.” It hit me in that moment how much I didn’t deserve her. This guy wanted her the moment he saw her, but it took me four months to figure out she was a piece of treasure sitting right in front of me. She wanted me, but I didn’t want her.