by Becky Harmon
“That wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be.” Kathleen smiled at Cassie. “Aren’t you glad we came here instead of the mall?”
“Yes, having less to choose from avoided a lot more vetoes.”
“I liked the poster Kaitlyn picked.” Chase smiled at them both.
Cassie ruffled his hair. “Don’t even think about it. It would be vetoed for your wall as well.”
When the girls returned, they checked out. Kathleen, Cassie and Dani pushed the three carts loaded down with their purchases. Chase ran ahead to push the store door open and held it for them. After the carts went through, a man pushed his way into the store through the door Chase held open, separating Morgan and Shaun from everyone else.
“That was rude,” Shaun said, looking back at the man who stopped and stared openly at Shaun. “What are you looking at?”
Cassie heard Shaun raise her voice behind them and motioned Kaitlyn to take her cart and keep moving. She turned and quickly appraised Shaun’s tight fists as she stared at the man. Cassie stepped between them, facing the man. “Shaun, go to the car.”
Shaun hesitated for a second and then followed Cassie’s directions.
Cassie met the man’s eyes. “Everything okay here?”
“I’m fine. Ask him.” He motioned toward Shaun’s retreating back.
Cassie knew Shaun could still hear their conversation. “I will talk with her when we get home.” Cassie turned and herded the kids across the parking lot toward the cars.
* * *
Shaun was sullen during lunch, slamming her tray on the table and pushing every door harder than required. Cassie and Kathleen attempted to engage everyone in conversation, but Shaun’s behavior was distracting. Cassie’s instinct was to air the situation and clear it up immediately, but Kathleen gave her a headshake when she approached the subject.
On the drive back, Cassie was distracted with her thoughts on how to handle Shaun’s behavior. Pulling into the driveway, she swerved to avoid hitting a fast-moving black car with tinted windows. Cassie watched her rearview mirror until the vehicle was past Kathleen and had pulled out on the highway.
While the girls unloaded the cars, Cassie tracked down Shelley in the office. “Did you talk with whoever was in the black car?”
Shelley groaned. “Yeah. Did you see him?”
“We passed him on the way in. He was leaving so fast I almost hit him head-on. What did he want?”
“He was inquiring about renting a cabin.” Shelley rolled her eyes. “He didn’t look like a nature person. His hair was slicked back with way too much gel, and he wore a cheap suit. I offered to show him one of the cabins but he said no. I don’t know why he even stopped.”
A door slamming in the house reminded Cassie of Shaun and the impending explosion.
Shelley raised her eyebrows.
“We had a bit of a confrontation at the store,” Cassie explained.
“Oh?”
Kathleen entered the office before Shelley could ask any questions.
“We need to separate her from the other girls until she calms down,” Cassie said, prepared for Kathleen to disagree with her.
“I agree. Do you want to or shall I?”
“I got this,” Cassie said, entering the house. Kaitlyn and Dani were standing in the kitchen, and before Cassie could ask where Shaun was she heard another door slam upstairs. She took the stairs two at a time and pushed open Shaun’s door without knocking. “Shaun, follow me. Now.”
Cassie exited the room, leaving the door open, and went out the front door. She left it open too without even looking behind her to see if Shaun was following. Dillon gave her a questioning look as she entered the barn, but she shook her head and grabbed two halters from the tack room. Cheyenne wandered over as soon as Cassie approached the fence line, and she placed the halter over the horse’s head. Handing the reins to Shaun, she haltered Angel, who stood nearby.
“Have you ever ridden before?” Cassie asked her.
“No.”
“Are you scared?”
“No.”
“Good. Then climb up those stairs right there.” Cassie pointed to the riding steps. “And swing your leg over.”
Shaun hesitated for a moment and then did as Cassie directed. As soon as she was on, Cassie handed her the reins and swung onto Cheyenne. Cassie radioed Shelley to mark the white board with her and Shaun on a horseback ride. They rode silently for about thirty minutes before Shaun spoke.
“Are you going to yell at me?”
“No, but I don’t think I have to tell you that your behavior was wrong.” Shaun didn’t respond so Cassie continued. “Can I ask you something?”
Shaun didn’t look at her, but she nodded her head.
“What do you think people see when they look at you?”
Shaun shrugged.
“Okay. How about a simple question? Why did you shave all the hair off your head?”
Shaun shrugged again.
“I’m not judging you, Shaun. I’m only trying to get you to think about your actions.”
After a few more silent minutes Shaun finally answered. “I thought it would be cool.”
“And is it?”
“Not when people act like that man did today. Then I just get embarrassed and angry.”
Cassie nodded. “It made me angry too.”
Shaun looked at her in surprise. Cassie continued, “Not angry at him exactly but angry because he upset you. People do stupid things. You can’t control what they do, but you can control how you react.”
Shaun remained silent.
“It’s okay to be upset, but it’s not okay to take it out on the people and things around you. You made a decision to be different in your appearance, so you have to be adult enough to handle close-minded reactions and not lose your temper.” Cassie turned Cheyenne back toward the barn. “We should head back.”
They made the return trip in silence. Cassie wanted Shaun to talk but understood that she might not be the person Shaun wanted to talk with or that Shaun might not want to talk at all. She mentally thanked her mother for the “control of your own emotions” lesson. Newly identified but still in the closet teenage Cassie found every excuse to lash out at the world. She didn’t have a lot of great mother-daughter memories but that was one that had stuck with her. It was the first time she realized she had control of her life.
Greg met them when they returned to the corral, and Cassie handed him the reins as she jumped down. “Thanks, Greg. I need to help Kathleen with dinner. Can you brush her for me?”
“Sure. Want me to do Angel too?” He looked at Shaun.
Cassie spoke for her. “No, I think Shaun would like to help you. Maybe you can show her.”
“No problem.”
Cassie turned to Shaun. “If you want to talk, let me know.”
Shaun nodded.
Cassie turned and headed out of the barn, stopping at the doors to look back. Greg was telling Shaun how to dismount without using the stairs or help. She turned back toward the house, thinking about what she had said to Shaun. She was upset with Shaun’s behavior, but she also wanted Shaun to think about how others perceived her appearance. All three of the older girls had outward appearances that would make conservative minds think poorly of them.
Cassie could give the tolerance lecture in her sleep. She spent years listening to the words being regurgitated out of the mouths of supervisors who then went out on the street and did whatever they wanted. As chief, she had made it personal for her men and women, holding her own lifestyle up for appraisal. She and Nett were well-liked and faced little resistance in their small town. Any of her officers who exhibited signs of discrimination in their work were asked to adjust their behavior and if that didn’t work they were fired for failure to comply with departmental policy. Her officers were expected to follow instructions and put away their personal biases—something it took her parents too many years to learn. She would check with Kathleen but maybe they could have a group
discussion with all the kids about it. Tolerance was something everyone needed to learn. The girls needed to understand the people who would be judging them as much as they needed to accept they might not always be judged for who they were.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Cassie found Kathleen and Shelley still in the office. Kathleen looked up first. “How’d that go?”
“Fine. I guess. I talked, she listened, but she didn’t have anything to say.”
“That’s pretty normal for her. I think she was embarrassed more than anything.”
Cassie sighed. “Probably, but she can’t act like that.”
“Did you tell her that?” Kathleen asked.
“I think so.”
Kathleen and Shelley laughed.
“We sent the nontalker to talk with the nontalker. What were we thinking?” Shelley shook her head at Kathleen.
Cassie blushed. “I talked.”
“I’m sure you did, honey.” Kathleen touched her arm and then quickly pulled away.
Shelley gave Cassie a sympathetic smile. “I think Dillon and I will get out of here. Guests were quiet today. Joe and Lori took out bikes before lunch, but I saw them come back about an hour ago. I didn’t see much movement from Cabin Two.”
Shelley left the office and Cassie realized for the first time in days she and Kathleen were alone. She resisted the urge to pull her into her arms and headed for the Keurig instead.
“Cup of tea?”
“Sure. Can we go out back?” Kathleen asked. “I’d like to sit in the quiet for a few minutes.”
They made their tea and crossed back through the house. Cassie erased her name from the white board before following Kathleen onto the back porch. They sat side by side without touching, and Cassie glanced at her.
“What?” Kathleen asked with a smile.
“I’m happy you’re here.”
“Me too.”
“That said, though…I still want more.”
Kathleen smiled again.
“You have no comment?” Cassie asked.
Kathleen winked at her. “What could I say?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe you want something more from me too.”
“Oh, I want something more all right.” Kathleen gently slid her hand down Cassie’s arm entwining their fingers. “I’d give anything to take you to bed right now.”
Cassie squeezed her hand and, leaning back in the chair, closed her eyes. “I can imagine the house to ourselves and that happening right now.”
Kathleen stroked her thumb across Cassie’s hand.
Opening her eyes, Cassie looked at her. “I want more than that though.”
Kathleen raised her eyebrows.
“When the girls leave, I want to explore this relationship. I’ll respect your request for distance as long as we can sneak moments like this occasionally.”
“This is fine. You just can’t kiss me.”
“I know.” Cassie sighed. “But I want to.”
“The feeling is mutual.”
Cassie savored the feel of Kathleen’s touch against her skin. “Why is it so quiet?” Cassie asked, opening her eyes.
“The girls are rearranging their rooms and washing bedding. They were very unhappy with me when I said everything needed to be washed before being used. I haven’t seen Chase since we unloaded the cars.”
Cassie laughed. “I’m glad you thought to tell them that. Chase is probably in his room reading. It was a full afternoon, and I’m sure he needed time away from the girls.”
Cassie had barely finished speaking when Greg interrupted them. “Have you guys seen Chase?”
Cassie stood up. “Not since we returned. I thought he was in your room getting away from the girls.”
“He’s not there,” Greg said. “I just checked.”
Kathleen stood up too. “Anything on the white board?”
Greg went back into the house with Kathleen and Cassie behind him. Cassie studied the empty spot beside Chase’s name.
“He didn’t come to the barn when he got back,” Greg said, the panic growing in his voice.
Cassie took the stairs two at a time and knocked on the girls’ doors as she passed. Doing a quick check in her room and Kathleen’s, she met the girls in the hallway.
“Has anyone seen Chase?”
The girls looked at each other. “He helped carry all the bags in but then we came upstairs,” Dani said. “What’s wrong?” She looked at Kathleen and Greg standing at the foot of the stairs.
“Let’s separate and check outside,” Cassie said, sending everyone in different directions. As she started to head outside too, Kathleen grabbed her arm. “I haven’t seen Zoey and Pandy since we returned either.”
“That’s good then. It means they’re with Chase.” Cassie walked from cabin to cabin, checking with guests and entering the empty ones, then she called Dillon and Shelley. They returned immediately and began helping to search.
It took almost thirty minutes for the area around the cabins to be checked and everyone to return to the porch. Cassie forced her panic down and sent the girls into the house.
“I don’t see any reason not to call the sheriff’s department,” Kathleen’s voice wavered.
“All the bikes are here.” Dillon nodded his agreement.
“Not that he would take one, but all the horses are here too,” Greg added.
Cassie pulled her cell phone from her pocket and punched in a number. She stepped off the porch as Deputy Steph Williams answered her call. Cassie quickly explained that a ten-year-old was missing. After a few minutes, she returned to the porch.
“Deputy Williams has issued an Amber Alert and will be here in a few minutes. She thinks we should widen our search area.”
Kathleen nodded, taking her hand. “We should update the girls.”
Kathleen and Cassie entered the house. The girls stood when they heard the door. Shaun stepped forward, and there was anguish on her face. “Did he run away because of the way I acted?”
Kathleen dropped Cassie’s hand and pulled Shaun into a hug.
“He didn’t leave because of you, Shaun,” Cassie said. “He probably just wandered off and got distracted.” She prayed her words were true, but deep down she knew it was something more. Chase wouldn’t wander off any more than he would get distracted and forget to check in.
Cassie and Kathleen exchanged a silent glance. Cassie’s unspoken fear registered on Kathleen’s face, and she withdrew from Shaun, keeping her arm around the girl’s waist.
Cassie continued. “As a precaution we’ve called the sheriff’s department and they’re going to send some deputies out to help us search.”
“We want to help too,” Dani demanded.
“I need you guys to stay here in the house.” Cassie looked at Kathleen and she nodded her agreement.
* * *
Kathleen watched Cassie sprint up the stairs before she sank into the chair. She wanted to ease the girls’ fears, but she didn’t like the unease she had seen on Cassie’s face. When Cassie returned, she crossed into the office and returned with several radios. She handed one to Kathleen and pulled her into the kitchen out of sight of the girls.
“Please stay in the house and keep the doors locked,” Cassie whispered. “I have a bad feeling about this.”
Kathleen nodded.
“I have my cell on vibrate, so call it if you need me. Don’t use the radio unless it’s an emergency.”
Kathleen felt numb as Cassie pulled her into her arms. Her hands slid around Cassie’s waist, and she gasped when her fingers touched the cold steel under Cassie’s shirt.
“Why?”
“I’m afraid Chase didn’t leave on his own.”
Dillon called through the front door. “Steph’s here.”
Kathleen held on to Cassie a moment longer and then took the quick kiss she offered before releasing her. Kathleen moved to the door as it closed behind Cassie. Through the side window, she watched her pass Dillon, Greg and Shelle
y and head straight for the police cruiser and the blond, ponytailed woman standing beside it. Even in jeans and not her uniform she clearly was taking charge of the situation. Kathleen knew at a glance that this was the woman Cassie had mentioned that she dated. She watched the deputy touch Cassie’s arm, and she forced herself to remain behind the closed door.
Steph wasn’t a threat to Kathleen or her new relationship with Cassie. She was here to find Chase. The reassurances didn’t stop her heart from racing as she compared the two women. Cassie’s tan face held more maturity than Steph’s light features, and though they were the same height, Cassie’s shoulders were broader. Kathleen longed to hold on to her right now, but as another cruiser appeared she stepped away from the door and joined the girls in the living room.
* * *
Cassie told Steph everything she could think of concerning Chase, including the possibility he may have witnessed a murder and then stood back while Steph radioed her fellow deputies. When she finished giving instructions, she addressed everyone. “There’s a black Chevy Impala with dark windows sitting at the side of the road outside your gate. Nobody in it at the moment.”
Shelley gasped. “That’s the guy that was here earlier.”
Cassie explained about their visitor and then let Shelley give his description. “He asked about kids, but I thought he meant he wanted to bring his kids. He was so sleazy. I should have known!”
Cassie sat on the steps beside her and pulled her into a hug. “It’s not your fault, Shelley. I saw him when we came in, and I didn’t think about it either.”
Several deputies arrived and Steph left the group to brief them. Cassie sent Greg and Shelley into the house to stay with Kathleen.
“Can we use your horses?” Steph asked as Dillon and Cassie approached the group of deputies.
“Of course,” Cassie answered immediately.
“We’ll need four horses. We have a search and rescue group coming as well, but they’ll have their own horses and dogs,” Steph explained. “We’d like to go ahead and get out there though.”
Cassie and Dillon headed for the barn and began saddling horses while Steph and the deputies went over a map on the hood of her car.