Our friend, Lucas, came to the hospital to take some photos as we were leaving the nursery. He captured the moments beautifully as we stepped out of the doors and put the babies in their car seats ready to embark on the short journey back to the hotel. My heart was pounding, not only because the babies were strong enough to go home now, but also since we were actually ready to get home and bond as a family, together in the peace and quiet of our apartment. The future beckoned, and in a few short minutes we would be on our own. I had flashes in my mind of all the great times we would spend together. I could see them in the future off on their bikes and us chasing them. I got the nurses a gift of some tea, biscuits and chocolate to thank them for having looked after the babies all this time. I had watched them intently for days, and I knew how hard they all worked and how difficult but rewarding their job was.
We clicked the car seats into the back and gave the nurses big hugs. Once again I had to hold back tears of joy. I was shaking as I placed my foot on the accelerator with Krzysztof, Leo and Olivia in the car. We pushed off into the Bangkok traffic, and as we rolled along the highway back to the hotel, I was the happiest I had ever been. What a perfect moment to share as a family. I looked across to Krzysztof and into the back. I could hear Leo and Olivia gurgling away and wondered what they must be thinking after being plucked from the hospital.
The hotel had arranged the most marvellous surprise homecoming anyone could ever have wished for. Here we were, set free as a family in the first few hours away from the hospital, and the hotel manager, Vivian, Blossom and her team had a big warm welcome arranged. As we pulled in towards the lobby, we could see all of the staff lined up ready to welcome us back. It was a superb sight, and I couldn’t get out of the car quickly enough to introduce Leo and Olivia to them. We were presented with the most beautiful garlands each, and I placed Leo’s and Olivia’s onto their car seats and excitedly looked on as everyone welcomed us as a new family.
When we got into our apartment, there were nearly thirty people there. It was a fantastic homecoming party for the twins. Even some of our friends were there to meet us too. The apartment had been decorated in pink and blue balloons, and bundles of presents, flowers and cards were there to greet us home. An enormous chocolate cake reading ‘Happy family’ sat there, soon to be enjoyed. The hotel had had two blankets made too with the babies’ English and Thai names embroidered on them, which was a delightful surprise. I was so overwhelmed and I wanted to say a few words to everyone, but all I could muster were tears of joy. I think the miracle of being home finally hit me; I just wanted to sink onto the sofa and cuddle with Krzysztof and the twins.
Luckily, our day nanny, Leah, was on hand to help us sort everything out as we began feeding and changing the babies and enjoying our time at home as a family. People drifted off after cooing for ages over the babies and, finally, it was just us in the apartment. That afternoon our friend, Larissa, who works at the hotel, had arranged for us to take some garlands to the spirit house in front of the hotel for a blessing in our new home. We took the babies down in their pram for the first time and Leah joined us for the time we spent there. It was dreamlike to think that we had made it home and were having a blessing with our friends from the hotel to welcome us there. We couldn’t have felt more cared for. I really enjoyed the blessing, being there with the babies and taking the time to be thankful, just as I had with Grace each Sunday in the hospital’s spirit house.
The afternoon passed so quickly and soon it was dark. Our first night at home had begun. I read the twins their first storybook that I had brought from London, and we put them to bed in special cots attached to our bed with the sides down, so we were all face to face with each other as we slept. I was exhausted and wanted to go to bed, and as our night nanny, Nora, took over at 7pm, bottles were prepared and lots of organisation was going on quietly in the background. Krzysztof and I went to bed, and I lay there staring at them both, not quite believing that they were ours and they were home. I texted Grace, as I had done over the last few days since she went home, to let her know that the twins were now out of the hospital too and we were about to try to go to sleep for an hour or two at least.
The first few hours were surreal, and the night more so – perfect, warm and joyful. Seeing both Leo and Olivia sleep, wake for milk and then snuggle for safety and warmth from us both was intimate and beautiful. I couldn’t quite believe that we were in such a breathtaking place for our family to begin – I could only have wished that our entire families had been there to share those moments with us. Our iPad kept ringing, though, and we answered all our friends and family. At least they got to spend a few moments with us as we experienced our first few hours at home.
I was relieved to hear each baby wake up and want to be fed. I had been so worried about them for so long. Now I could place my hand on them to comfort them, or talk to them, or look at them. I didn’t need to text or worry or read between the lines. Our babies were home with us, and the mammoth task of looking after newborn twins was our amazing reality now.
I knew it would take some time to get to know how we would work together with Leah and Nora, but they were both so attentive and warm towards the babies. We soon saw how differently such newborns were cared for in the East. They were wrapped up warmly and placed in a cool room in darkness, swaddled in blankets or towels – it all seemed strange to me but second nature to our nannies. I was hesitant to question it because we both tired quickly, and the amalgamation of routines seemed to work for the babies and us for the most part.
Our first day on our own was a Sunday – without the nannies as they both had Sundays as their day off. I wondered not so much how we would cope, but more that we would be late to feed or change one of them. We decided to venture out on our first day alone together as a family and went to a superb hotel on the Chao Phraya river for lunch; we enjoyed some delicious food, between feeds. The babies seemed to thrive in the fresh air and we were confident enough to stop at Dean & DeLuca for coffee and cake on our way home. I was well-practised at folding and unfolding the pram by now and getting it in and out of our car. I felt very accomplished that we had gone out so early after getting home and I had actually enjoyed our time without being too worried and had been able to relax. It felt perfect, and every time I looked across to see one of the babies or Krzysztof smiling, I was filled with happiness.
I wanted to take the time without the nannies around for Grace to meet the babies for the first time after their birth and do something special together. She had seen them at the birth, but only through the glass at the hospital after that and hadn’t held them yet. I so wanted her to enjoy the moment with the twins and not be conscious of anyone else in the background. I was worried about her bonding further with the babies but knew it was best for Leo and Olivia to have some time and cuddles with their birth mum. We decided to go to the temple that we had been to before and have a blessing with the same monk. So there we were, me driving, Krzysztof in the back of the car with the twins, and Grace up front directing me to the temple. When we arrived it was hot, so we had the babies covered up to protect them from the sun. I was more than a little worried about infection from all the birds, or the babies getting too hot, but seeing the monk and spending this time with Grace was important for us all. I was glad that our first trip out together was to the temple, and although I was consciously searching for any bonding between Grace and the babies, I was equally glad that there were no difficult moments at all, other than a little initial awkwardness or shyness. It was a special day for us all, and I’m glad we went for the blessing together and took the time to relax and not rush, which was important for the babies.
Our first trip to the hospital to get the babies weighed later that same week was an interesting one. Getting everyone together to leave the apartment and into the car for a five-minute appointment was exhausting, but we were so glad that after a week they had both put on about 300 grams each. The milk we ha
d ferried from the UK seemed to be doing the trick, and they were both enjoying it alongside the breast milk Grace had brought to us. Everywhere we went, especially at the hospital, we got stopped and people marvelled at the twins. I suppose the vision of three grown-ups - our nanny, Krzysztof and myself - arriving with the twins in their buggy contraption with the adaptor for having the two car seats attached on top did make a bit of a spectacle. I was getting used to it, but to see it for the first time did attract longer looks. People would often stare.
After the first week, we had our appointment at the Thai passport office. We were meeting Sadie, our representative from the clinic, to help with the Thai side of the paperwork, and Grace would need to meet us there, as she had to sign paperwork to produce the Thai passports for the babies. Sadie had helped us to get the birth certificates at the hospital and also to produce the translations and affidavit that would allow us to travel out of Thailand with the twins. We were glad of her help, as she had obviously done this many times before and for a small fee worked hard to get everything produced quickly. As we were called in to our allotted appointment for the passports, we had to prop each baby up with a white background in their car seats to get a photograph for their passport. They also had to do a toe print as their signature, which left big blue blot marks all over their clothes. I was grateful to have Grace’s help with the babies as they needed milk halfway through the application and it was cold in the room we were in, so I was running out of blankets to keep them warm with all the moving around. So, there I was, putting the formula into the bottles, with Grace enjoying feeding one of the babies the other bottle as we waited as patiently as we could to progress the applications. Krzysztof and Leah had to wait outside the room while we did all the paperwork – it seems that nothing can be done quickly when it comes to passport applications.
As we were ready to leave, the attendant confirmed that they would forward the passports to our lawyer’s office in a few days once they were printed and asked me to look over the paperwork to confirm everything was correct. Just as I was reading through the pages, I realised that they had mixed the babies up and had produced the paperwork for Leo with Olivia’s photo on and vice versa. I was shocked, but I didn’t want to make any trouble. Once they realised there had been a mistake, the supervisor came over and, after a lot of discussion, it seemed the entire applications had to be deleted and we’d have to begin again, right from the start. So, out came the white background for the car seats and more blue ink for their toe prints. After a few hours, with everyone tired and keen to get home, we said our goodbyes to Grace and Sadie and made our way back to the hotel.
As the days and hours progressed, feeding Leo and Olivia gradually moved in and out of sync. When they fed together, it felt a success, but when they were out of sync or one of the babies was feeding more slowly than the other, it was completely exhausting. The daytime quickly ran into the evening and into the night, and I was so grateful to Nora and Leah for the round-the-clock help. At moments I was petrified about how we would cope back in London. We managed to get the babies to feed around 3am, 6am, 9am, 12 noon, 3pm, and 6pm, with their last feed of the day at midnight. We bathed them along the ‘production line’ at around 5.30pm and then they would be hungry for their evening feed. We would then swap them from sleeping in their day beds in the living area to swaddle suits and let them sleep in the bedroom in their cribs attached to our bed. Krzysztof and I were so tired. My eyes hurt and my body ached. At least we knew where we were and who should be doing what.
Having the nannies there twenty-four hours a day allowed us to spend time soothing and comforting the babies, even while exhausted, as our nannies did all the washing and preparing in the background. I needed to sleep earlier than Krzysztof, so he would help Nora with the midnight feed and I would set an alarm to wake up after a few hours to feed the babies with Nora at 3am. Krzysztof would have had enough sleep then to do the 6am and, after the nannies swapped shifts, we would both try to do the 9am together, once Leah had prepared their bottles and milk and had everything ready to get them dressed for the day. It worked well, and the routine allowed us to go off to the shops between feeds or take some time sleeping in the daytime, as we all knew where we needed to be. We would settle down in the evening and watch TV and eat dinner, and it felt so warm and happy even though at times it was all but quiet! Olivia had a little colic and would struggle to sleep in the evening, whereas Leo was the opposite and would rush his bottle and be asleep after he had burped and his head rested on his bed.
Having the nannies do all the laundry and prepare all the bottles and milk for the babies allowed Krzysztof and me to spend time bonding with the babies and not get too caught up in the mountains of laundry and sterilising. We were lucky enough to be handed a cup of tea every time we sat down to feed the babies, and the nannies would take great pride in preparing us a fruit platter to nibble on during the evenings or afternoons.
With two babies, I had to remind myself to sit and spend time with each one in turn, as it was easy to get caught up with the one who needed his or her nappy changing. Now I would do my best to sit and cuddle or chat to the contented baby while they were awake. We were constantly aware of the clock and how long it would be until the next feed. We would monitor and record how much each baby was drinking, and we were meticulous in writing down the amounts and the times each of them had pooed. With two babies, it was easy to lose track or forget who had had what, or done what, so the journal was a great way to review the day’s goings-on.
Since I’d told her that Grace was pregnant, my mum had been waiting to get on the plane and come to Bangkok. She was so delighted that the twins had arrived safely, and I know secretly she had been as stressed as I was, waiting for them to arrive healthily and to get to spend time with them. It was to be her first trip to Asia, and I knew it would take its toll on her with all the excitement of meeting the babies too. As the day approached for her to leave Scotland, we were constantly sending her shopping lists and requests for things to bring with her. It was exciting to feel such a sense of occasion for her forthcoming arrival. Krzysztof and I planned to meet her at the airport with the twins as a surprise, as she was expecting to get the hotel car and to meet us when she arrived at the hotel apartment. We made it to the airport just in time, after fighting through lots of traffic, to meet her coming through into the arrivals hall. As she wearily approached us I could tell she wasn’t expecting to see us, and as soon as she set eyes on the twins she burst into tears. I passed Leo to her for her first cuddles, and it was amazing to see her meet Olivia too for the first time straight after.
We all made our way back to the hotel, and after my mum had got to grips with the jet lag, it was difficult to prise either of the babies off her. She would have them in the pram and take them off for walks around the hotel; it was great to watch as she bonded with both babies. Although I’ve watched her with my other nieces and Lily, this seemed different, and lots of sayings and stories that reminded me of my own childhood popped up all the time she was there. As we got to grips with us all being together, we planned to see as much of Bangkok as we could and have lovely times together at the apartment, relaxing and enjoying time with the babies.
We had planned a short trip to Hua Hin for a few days with my mum, and this was going to be our first few nights away on an adventure as a family. We’d see how we coped with travelling and staying somewhere else other than the apartment. In the back of my mind, I was thinking about, and taking notes on, how we would travel back to the UK; this trip would be our first test. I had booked a limo van from the hotel we were staying at to collect us all. We spent the night before packing everything we thought we would need – I had no idea that I could pack so many things. There were lots of suitcases, sterilisers, baths and boxes, and I wondered how we would even fit everything into the three rooms we had booked for us all. I enjoyed the journey down the coast as a family and had a vision of how it would be with Krz
ysztof and Emma, the twins and Lily, all heading off to the beach somewhere in the future. I was excited, and as we got closer to the resort I couldn’t wait to get everything unpacked and jump into the pool.
2 weeks old
Our nanny, Leah, was travelling with us and she would help us through the night as well. It was exhausting, but I was glad we pushed ourselves and got time to spend relaxing and going out at night in the hotel while Leah and one of the hotel babysitters helped to feed the babies. I finally believed we could do it and here we were, in one of my favourite resorts by the beach, and as we dozed off as a family of four in the afternoons, with the babies in their travel cots and the smell of the beach in the air, I was relaxed and happy and enjoying bonding time with my family. It was great for my mum to see more of Thailand too, and I think she was really impressed with the resort. We got to take some lovely photos of the twins outdoors and managed to get through the entire trip without them getting so much as one mosquito bite. Krzysztof and I, on the other hand, were not so lucky. Going to bed at night under the mosquito nets and pulling the cots in under the nets too, even though they were already covered by their own individual nets, was a huge effort but off to sleep we went and woke up with the sounds of the birds and animals outside. I sat by our pool and fed Leo his bottle as the sun rose and loved the fact we were able to be out of the air-conditioning with the babies and for them to be safe, and, of course, enjoy the warmth in the shade for a short while. The few days were over so quickly, but as we were packing up to go back to Bangkok, I was already planning our next trip – somewhere a little more adventurous which would really get us prepared for the trip back to the UK. We were all worn out by the time we got back to the hotel, and I was so glad to see Nora as she arrived in the evening and took care of the mountains of laundry that we had accumulated in such a short time.
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