He looked skeptical.
I fingered the bow on a present. “We can talk about it sometime, if you're interested.”
“You managed to walk away from five lost years as a hero. The savior of the Terran race. I find that fairly remarkable.”
“Yeah.” I shrugged. “I was lucky.”
He squinted up through smoke. “So is my daughter. She finally divorced you and found a man who knows the meaning of responsibility.”
I bit my lower lip. “I just want to see Lisa. That's all.”
He gazed at the sky and frowned, looking inward, I think. “I spent the better part of my life on missions offworld.”
“I know.”
“Some of them took years to wrap up.”
I nodded.
He met my eyes. “I never left my family behind. They always came with me.”
I sat down. “I wanted Al and Lisa to come to Syl' Tyrria. I begged her. She said she was sick of that life.” I lowered my eyes and struggled with a twist of guilt. “I could've done research on Earth, but it wouldn't have been in my field, astrobiology.”
“What're your plans for the future?” he asked gruffly and drew in smoke.
“My job with the lab is still secure.”
“So you'll continue your work offworld?”
“That's usually where astrobiology is done.”
He smiled for the first time. He wanted me out of Al and Lisa's lives once and for all. I felt a sting of anger. He wanted me out of my daughter's life for good!
Abby stood silhouetted behind the living room curtains, wiping her hands on a dishtowel. She turned and walked toward the kitchen. I thought of the silver being, of his proposed rendezvous for reasons only he knew. I scooped up the presents. “I'm going in to see my daughter.” I went to the door.
“What's your problem this time, Jules? I can see that you've got one.” His voice came quietly through the darkness. He exhaled smoke. “I've still got connections.” Joe had always been an astute student of human nature, with a specialty in nuances. It was probably a prerequisite for his job. He was reading me like an open book. I kept my hand on the doorknob and felt my throat tighten. It was easier when he was angry. “You can't help me, Joe. Not unless you can rout out an alien who hooks your mind and reels you in as easily as a fish.”
Light glinted off his glasses as he turned to look at me. “One of Sye Kor's relatives?”
“No. But I seem to have an attraction for alien tels with mega problems.” I met Joe's gaze. “I don't know when I'll get to see Lisa again. Maybe…
“I cleared my throat and shrugged. Maybe never! I thought.
“You have five minutes to sit down and talk?” he asked.
I hesitated.
“Before you see Lisa.”
I sat down, fumbled presents and dropped one. I picked it up and absently rubbed a thumb across shiny blue paper.
Joe tapped his pipe on an ashtray. “It's illegal to enter a person's mind without his permission, you know. We put that one on the books a long time ago. So who's this crote who's been probing you?”
“I don't think this alien's read the book.”
”We could throw it at him.”
“We'd have to locate him first. He wants me to come to planet Halcyon.”
“Then he's a pretty damn strong telepath to have reached you here!”
“Oh yeah.” I stared at the presents and wondered if the IQ machinery, with its crystals, had anything to do with the silver being's ability to reach me telepathically. Would be nice if he were helpless to contact me without it. It seemed strange to talk of alien threats here on Joe's front porch, overlooking the pure blaze of Denver's lights. Lights that hid the squalor of the crumbling city. But then, most Earth cities were crumbling.
“But he's not stronger than the Worlds Court,” Joe said.
“If the Worlds Court can locate him. He'll know they're coming before the ship makes the jump. Now do you mind if I go in and see Lisa?”
“I read about your press conference.” He removed the pipe. “I agree with you on one point. NASA should be more cautious with its colonization program. There are dangers out there we never anticipated, and we should've.” He studied me. “I offered to go to Tartarus and drag you back by your ears but she wouldn't have it. What does this alien want?”
“I wish I knew. Whatever it is…” I watched the shimmering pool of city lights and realized how tired I was, weary as a spent day. “I doubt I'm telepathically strong enough to fight it…him. But I intend to try. I'm not keen on meeting this crote, or a trip to Halcyon, especially if it's one way.”
Joe got up and shook his head. He opened the door and gestured for me to follow him down the hallway. I knew he wouldn't ask for more information but would wait for me to offer it.
Not on his life. If this silver being could reach a non-tel on Earth, and I gave Joe specifics, it could mean Joe's life.
“Lisa's in the den,” he told me as I followed him. “Kid looks at more vis than the real world.”
We went past Abby's office with its shelves of program cubes. The lit monitor displayed a human pancreas organic. I wondered what modified cells she was designing into it.
Lisa sat cross-legged on the rug before the vid's small holo stage, her back to us as we entered the den, which was paneled in real wood. She held a stuffed Cleocean doll with mock white downy fur. Its six violet eyes blinked at me from over her shoulder and its twin tails protruded from beneath her arm. I wondered if Cleocean children went to bed with stuffed humans tucked under a flipper. A fire blazed in the stone hearth. The log was fake, I knew, but it crackled, sparked, and emitted a smell of burning wood.
A Siamese cat curled on the woven rug watched me with jade-green eyes. My heart was thumping as I gazed at Lisa's blonde curls, her small, fragile body. She needed a good father, I admitted to myself. Someone who loved and protected her. I lowered my head, afraid to face my daughter.
“Lisa?” Joe said. “There's someone – “
“I'll go to bed after Space Bears!” She hunched forward as though to plant herself. “I promise, Grandpa.”
“Your father's here to see you,” Joe said softly.
She turned. Her eyes widened and she hugged the doll, then buried her face in it. Joe went to her and picked her up with a grunt, doll and all. “It's all right, sweetheart,” he said gently. “Say hello to your Daddy.”
She peeked out from behind the doll's flipper and hugged Joe's neck. “Hello. Mommy showed me holos of Daddy,” she told Joe.
I remembered the presents. “Uh, I bought you some presents, Lisa.”
She stared at the bright boxes. “Did you bring them back from pig Tartas?” she mumbled into the doll's cloth body.
Joe grimaced. “Everything's pig this week,” he told me.
I smiled. “Well. One's from Tartarus.” I told Lisa and extended a wrapped sea shell. “Do you want to open it?”
She pressed her head against Joe's neck. “Can I, Grandpa?”
”Sure you can. Suppose you and your father open them together?”
She stared at the presents and nodded. He put her down on the carpet. “Grandma's in the kitchen and I'll be in my study.” He bent stiffly, hands on knees. “Is that all right with you, honey?”
She looked from me to the presents and nodded again.
“Good.” Joe patted her head. “I'll call a few friends,” he told me casually and left the room.
I knew just how serious Joe would turn when he got on the link with his friends. People from the Pentagon, W-CIA, the Worlds Court. Probably Interstel itself on planet Alpha, the seat of the Worlds' government. What could they do about a being they couldn't locate? But Joe never did give up in the face of a small thing like futility.
I sat on an easy chair armrest and watched Lisa pull at the ribbon of the shell present. The armrest groaned as it tried to conform to something heavier than an arm. I closed my mind to any possibility of tel-reading her thoughts. There's such a
thing as privacy, after all.
On the holo stage, bears twirled and sang against a backdrop of stars as they skated on beams of sunlight.
“Uh, Lisa?” I began. “Is it OK if I come and sit next to you?”
She looked up, a solemn expression on her round face, her blue eyes still mistrustful. “I guess so. You can sit there.” She pointed to a spot away from her.
I sat where she'd indicated, legs tucked, and put the other presents between us.
She played with the stubborn ribbon. “Mommy has lots of holographs of me and you and her, but Charles made Mommy put them all away.”
“Oh?” I suppressed a dark thought.
“Mommy says you were just sick and couldn't come home but that you still love me.” She tugged at the ribbon. “But Charles says you should go to a doctor if you're sick. Did you go to a pig doctor?”
“No.” I smiled. “But I do love you, Lis'. I always have.”
“Were you really sick? Sometimes Mommy tells me right lies 'cause she doesn't want me to feel bad.”
“I must've been sick if I didn't come home to you,” I said softly. “That's white lies, Lis'.”
She knitted her brows and watched me. “Sometimes Mommy looks at your picture and then she does this.” She shook her head from side to side.
“You, uh…” I shifted uneasily. “You want me to help you open that present?”
She scratched her cheek, brows still furrowed. “I can open it.” She got up and gave me the Cleocean. It had a sweet perfume aroma. From my experience with Cleoceans on Syl'Tyrria, rotted kelp would've been more authentic.
She sat closer this time and I waited quietly while she undid the ribbon and tore apart wrapping paper. She rounded her lips and drew in a breath as she uncovered the iridescent whorled shell. “Mommy and Charles took me to the beach.” She giggled, her tongue between teeth. “I went swimming and you know what?”
I grinned. “What?”
She clamped the shell to her small ear, more intricate than the calcified souvenir. “I can hear the ocean. Listen!” She came over on her hands and knees and shoved the shell against my ear.
I winced as it scraped, and listened. And almost shrank back from the memory that sound evoked. The echo of long waves hissing like virulent thoughts.
“You hear that? That's the ocean!”
“I hear it, Squiggles.” I pulled down her shirt, which had ridden up her belly, and extended my hands. “Can I have a hug?”
She looked toward the kitchen. “Where's Grandma?”
I lowered my hands. “She's in the kitchen, and Grandpa's – “
“Making link calls.” She pursed her lips and deepened her voice. “Hello Mister Secretary.”
She giggled as she got up. She sat on my crossed legs and leaned against me as she turned the shell over in small hands.
I put my arms loosely around her, gently kissed her forehead, and felt a welling of love, sudden and strong. This was my child. My Lisa. I stroked her fine light curls. This was my flesh. To love. To protect with my life.
She pressed the shell to her ear and I rocked her.
My Lisa.
“Daddy?”
I smiled at that. “Yeah, Lis'?”
“Are you gonna live with us?”
“No. But I'll…I'll visit you.” I hoped. “And bring you presents.”
“Are you gonna go away again?”
I swallowed to force down the tightness in my throat. “I might have to, baby.”
“Are you gonna get sick again?”
“No, I don't think I'll get sick. And this time I'll try real hard to come back and see you.”
She stuck a finger inside the shell, probing. “Can I come to pig Tartas?”
“Tell you what, someday we'll go to the beach and look for more shells.”
“On pig Tartas?”
“How about California?”
“OK.” She yawned.
“You want to go to bed? You can open the rest of the presents tomorrow morning.”
“Do I have to?” Her whine was well rehearsed.
I looked up and saw Abby in the doorway. “Oh. Hello, Misses Hatch.” I managed a smile. “How are you?” I started to lift Lisa off my lap to get up, but Abby motioned me down.
“I'm fine, thank you.” Her hair was a bit grayer, neat as ever. Her face showed a few more wrinkles. Same mild eyes and kind smile, though. The apron was tied around a waist as narrow as in the wedding portrait on the mantle. Abby was one of the few constants in a world sliding into decline. “How are you, son?”
God, I wished she hadn't called me that. It tore at my tenuous composure. “I'm all right, thanks. Uh, how are things at Bio Tech?” I knew she loved her work.
She tilted her head, nodded in a familiar gesture that made me yearn for times lost. “Politics and poker, as usual. Did you have supper? There's mock stew and fresh rolls. Wouldn't take me a minute to fuse it.”
“No thanks, I've eaten.” I lowered my gaze. I always do when I'm lying. I had given my burgers to Tickbag.
She glanced down the hall. “Joseph's busy making calls. But he'll be going out to buy a newspaper. Our text transmitter went down. I can't understand it, we just had it serviced.” She looked from Lisa to me. “Well, help yourself to some cookies, Jules. They're still hot.”
“Thanks.”
Abby has the non-judgmental nature of a Buddhist monk. I guess she lied too, about the transmitter. I figured she wanted to give Lisa and me some more time alone. I never deserved this family. I guess I only deserved losing it.
“All we can get is the price of hogs from Arklahana,” she said with a smile. “I'll just go along and keep Joseph company. We'll be back in twenty minutes.”
“OK.”
”Nice to see you, Jules. You're looking well. A little thin, but well.”
”You're looking well too, Misses Hatch. It's good to see you, too. Abby?”
“Yes, Jules?”
“Be careful walking out there.”
She nodded and thickened her Southern drawl. “Ah have always depended on Joseph an' the kindness of stinglers.” I knew she carried a snub-nosed flashrod in her purse. We laughed and she turned and left. I heard her in the hallway, talking to Joe in subdued tones. “He's her father, Joseph. And it's only for twenty minutes.” Joe's deep voice rumbled something. ”Oh, for heaven's sake, you've been a government agent for too long,” I heard Abby say. “Sometimes you just have to use your good judgment. He was never abusive or unpredictable, Joseph. Don't you remember how gentle and loving he was with Lisa for those first five months?” A point in my favor. His answer was indistinct. ”Yes, Joseph, before he left.”
Joe mumbled something.
“All right, irresponsible, true,” I heard her answer as the front door closed behind them. I mentally wiped away my one good point.
Lisa giggled at me as though we shared a secret. She held the Cleocean at arms' length and talked to it. “Now, Ab,” she imitated Joe's deep voice, “there's no need to go walking around those dangerous streets spending money on pig stuff.” She giggled again and I hugged her close.
“Grandpa's newspaper pig thing is broken.”
“Oh?” That was not the only thing that was broken. I could not shake the sadness in me. Lost years of not being part of my daughter's life.
She gazed up, her smooth cheeks pink in firelight. “Can I open the rest of the presents now?”
“Sure, Squiggles.” I stifled a yawn.
“You want to go to bed, Daddy?”
“Do I have to?” I used a whiny voice.
She stared at me in surprise, then laughed.
“I think I'll stay up late.” I stroked her hair. “And watch you open presents.”
She handed me the Cleocean again and tore into the boxes. A miniature hovair; a stuffed white rabbit and the black box with our galaxy and a protruding zoom lens that could home in on all known star systems with inhabited worlds. Cube recordings gave information on each planet
. I couldn't resist adding that educational toy.
On a hunch I lifted the box, adjusted the lens to my eye, and went through the toy's itinerary of newly discovered planets, searching for Halcyon.
A green light beeped when I found it.
I lowered the toy, smiled at Lisa as she looked up from opening the last present, then I went back to the box and turned on the cube.
“Halcyon is the second world of the four-planet Demeter System. Demeter is a Class G star slightly above the galactic plane. Halcyon was discovered on January 6, 2127, by a Borzian probe. Since the planet was suitable for human habitation but not for Borzian habitation, the Borzians graciously gave it to Earth as a gift of their friendship.
“The planet was explored by NASA and rated CW for colonization world. Four years later Halcyon was named and settled by a group of environmentalists called GreenWorlds. GreenWorlds strongly believes in not harming the land, water, air, animals or plant life of any planet. They have named their Halcyon colony Laurel, because the Laurel plant and wreath symbolize honor and achievement.
“If you wish to learn more about this world, ask your parents or teachers to check out cubes for you about Halcyon.”
A small revolving planet holo showed an Earth-like gem of a world with forests, mountains, plains, deserts, and seas too blue to be believed. Lush white clouds swirled.
Zooming closer I witnessed a parade of alien life forms, none amorphous or silver. The holo paused on a group of natives standing before the stone portal to a cave. The aliens were tall, humanoid, with skin like yellow and orange crepe paper.
“The Kubraens are a gentle, almost timid non-technological people,” the narrator continued, “who depend heavily upon fibrin trees and gathering native roots and tubers for food, and clothing, which is woven from shredded fibrin. These vegetarians are peaceful by nature and non-territorial, with a strong belief in the oneness of all Kubraen villages. The closest Kubraen village is twenty kilometers northwest of Laurel. With few predators and no wars on the planet, this placid race never developed the concept of weapons.”
Halcyon Nights (Star Sojourner Book 2) Page 4