by Susan Fox
She grimaced. “I did, but we were both at fault. We talked about it last week.”
“You talked to your ex?” There was more than a touch of jealousy in his voice.
“He invited me for a drink. We had a civilized talk about what went wrong.” She didn’t have to tell Aaron the rest of what Ray had said but to omit it felt deceptive. “He suggested we consider getting back together. But I knew that wasn’t a good idea.” She smiled across the table. “Yes, because of you. Not that I thought I’d see you again. But because being with you showed me that my feelings for Ray weren’t enough, or the right kind, for us to be happy.”
“Good.”
His expression of smug male satisfaction made her smile. But only momentarily. She sipped the wine—a delicious, fruity riesling that went well with the Thai food—and said, “So, anyhow, lesson learned. Relationships take work. Not just ones with sisters, but with, uh, lovers, too. Caring for each other is a great start, but it’s no guarantee things will work out. I know some things I’d do differently.” She put down her glass. “How about you? You said you’ve never had a serious relationship with a girlfriend.”
“No.” He rested his elbows on the table. “I’m pretty messed up when it comes to relationships. I have zero role models other than casual friends on Destiny who’ve managed to make things work. You’re the one who said I was capable of having a loving relationship. Until then, I didn’t think I was.” His lips twisted. “So you have yourself to blame for all this.”
“I don’t regret what I said. I don’t regret you being here. Even if we can’t make it work, I’m so happy you told me you have feelings for me.”
“See, that’s it. That’s the thing. My feelings for you. They wouldn’t quit. I’d always told myself I wasn’t a relationship kind of guy, that I didn’t want to share my life. Even now, I admit that a part of me is skeptical that I could ever make it work. The same with Miranda. We’re both pretty screwed up, thanks to the way we grew up.”
“Adults are capable of overcoming what happened in childhood.”
“If I didn’t think it was possible, I wouldn’t be here.” He stared her straight in the eyes. “Eden, I know I’m a risk. And you like things to be more predictable than risky. If you tell me to get out of your life, I’ll do it. But if you’re willing to take a mighty big chance on a damaged piece of goods like me, and explore what we might have together, I promise I’ll try my best to be a man who deserves you.”
What could she possibly say to that, with him laying his soul on the line? Haltingly, she started out. “This is all new to me, too. When Ray and I got together, we seemed so compatible and things were easy. Not passionate, not intense, not complicated. But with you, right from the beginning, even with our differences and squabbles, and the fact that it was only supposed to be a fling, I was drawn to you in a whole different way. I tried to keep things light and easy, but my heart wasn’t getting the message.”
He nodded, obviously identifying.
She went on. “I wanted more from you, but you made it clear you wouldn’t or couldn’t give it, so I tried to convince myself it was just a rebound thing. That I wasn’t really falling for you, that once we were apart I’d get over you. But then we talked on the phone and I learned more about the kind of man you are. How could I not care for that man? And now here you are, telling me that you care for me.”
“Complicating your life even more,” he said ruefully.
“Yes. Yes, you are. As you said, I like things to be organized, predictable, comfortable. And this isn’t. A future with you wouldn’t be.” But now she knew he had feelings for her, could she imagine a future without him?
He pressed his fingers to his temples. “I can’t lie. No, it wouldn’t be.”
“This has been a tough year for me,” she said softly. “Losing Nana hit hard, and Mom’s illness was horrible. I was—still am—scared. Trying to stay positive takes a toll. Then there was the breakup with Ray. I truly believed I didn’t have the time or energy for a relationship. Even if I did, shouldn’t it be a comfortable, supportive one, not one that presents so many challenges?”
“I’m supportive. I helped you find your aunt.”
“That’s true.” Did that mean he’d be supportive in other areas, like if she canceled a date because her mom needed her?
“You’re comfortable with me. Comfortable enough to try things you’d never done before.”
“Hmm. I hadn’t thought of it that way. I was thinking more of just normal life. Not kayaking and picnics but day-to-day living. Like, do you ever just sit back in a comfy chair and read a book?”
“I’ve always been a reader, ever since I taught myself, then Miranda, to read when we were little. But how about you? You’re the one who’s wound tight, always with something you need to be doing.”
“The past year has been like that,” she admitted. “But even so, I’ve found some quiet time for myself. A bath before bed or fifteen minutes of reading before I turn out the light.”
“See, I have you beat. I’m the laid-back one, remember? I can spend an hour on the deck reading, or even just watching the birds and the ocean. When it comes to books, my favorites are mysteries. I like trying to figure it out before the detective does. What do you read?”
“Mysteries too, and legal thrillers. Which is silly, because that’s so far away from the kind of law I practice. All the same, they intrigue me.” And now she could imagine herself and Aaron reading companionably in the evening. Before going to bed and making multiorgasmic love. “Okay, so we have more in common than I thought. But there’s still one huge obstacle. I can’t imagine leaving my parents and Ottawa’s their home. I’m guessing you feel the same way about Destiny Island and your sister and niece.”
“People move all the time,” he said tentatively.
“People who have as strong ties to their homes as we do?” She knew it happened, but she honestly couldn’t imagine either of them doing it.
“You’re the one who said relationships take work. There need to be compromises.”
She crossed her arms. “Is that your way of saying I’d need to move to Destiny Island?”
“No. Though that would be wonderful. I mean, if things worked out with us. But no, I’m saying we’d both need to think seriously about it. You’ve seen Destiny. There are things you like about it. Now I’m here in your city for a week. Show it to me, Eden. Show me what you love about it.”
A week? He’d taken a week off work during his busiest season? “It’s a great city, but mostly what I love is my family. Are you willing to meet them?”
“Of course. I want to.”
But did she want him to meet them? What could she tell her folks? If she said Aaron was an acquaintance, she’d be deceiving her parents. But if she told her family that she and Aaron had feelings for each other, her parents would worry that she might move to Destiny Island to be with him.
“You’re overanalyzing again,” Aaron said.
“That’s because it’s complicated. I don’t know the right thing to do.”
“Feelings like ours might only come around once in a lifetime. Isn’t it worth facing all those complications and challenges?”
Eden’s heart said yes. She wanted to be with Aaron. But her common sense said it couldn’t possibly work. And yet, what if it could? How amazing would that be? On the other hand, if it didn’t work . . . Well, she’d been there already with Ray and survived. She and Aaron had known each other only a short time. Maybe they’d find their feelings for each other really weren’t that strong and it’d be relatively easy to walk away.
“Maybe it is worth it,” she finally agreed. “You’re here in Ottawa. So let’s spend time together and see where things go.”
Before she’d finished speaking, he was on his feet, coming around the table and bending down to hug her. “Thank you.”
His touch felt so right. She smiled at him. “Thank you, too.”
A twinkle ignited in his eyes. �
�As for where things might go, I have an idea where we should start.”
“Where?”
“Your bedroom.”
Oh yes. She wanted to be naked with him, to make love, but she couldn’t resist a moment’s teasing. “You’ve barely touched your dinner and I thought you were starving.”
“Right now, I’m starving for you. After that . . . well, you’ve got a microwave, right?”
“I have a microwave.” She rose, a quick motion that caught him off guard as she more or less launched herself into his arms. In that moment, she banished all her concerns—or at least deferred them—and vowed to wholeheartedly enjoy this reunion with Aaron. Her lover, and just possibly her future love.
He held her close, tighter than he’d ever held her, like he never wanted to let her go. Her head was tucked under his chin, her cheek against his chest, and his arms were strong bands around her back. She didn’t feel confined, though. More like cherished.
Everything about this was different from before. They were on her turf, even if she felt as off-balance as she had on Destiny Island. They’d confessed feelings, had a serious discussion, and made a commitment of sorts. Rather than setting a time limit on their relationship, as they’d done when they’d first gotten together, they were braving a future.
She took a deep breath, pushed back against his encircling arms, and raised her head to his. “Let’s make love.”
Never would she grow tired of seeing Aaron’s smile or take it for granted. He freed her except to hold her hand, their fingers firmly entwined. Joined only in that way, they walked down the hallway. The apartment had two bedrooms. When she and Ray had lived here, they’d used the large one as a shared office and the smaller as their bedroom. After he’d gone, she’d reversed things. Now she had a spacious bedroom with a queen-size bed, a long, low bureau with a mirror above it, and a reading chair by the window.
Even though she and Aaron had made love several times before, her nerves fluttered.
He took her by the shoulders, turning her so she faced him. Gently, he brushed her hair back from her face. She went up on her toes as he leaned down and their lips met. It was almost like a first kiss. Sweet and pure, just lips to lips, conveying greeting and appreciation. Even so, arousal sparked inside her.
His tongue teased the crease between her lips and she opened a tiny bit, a soft sigh of breath escaping. She let him woo her, persuade her, their mouths repeating the story of how they’d first come together. Then she took control herself, catching the tip of his tongue between her teeth and nipping, not hard enough to hurt but enough that he’d feel it.
He moaned and ground his hips against her, showing her how turned on he was.
She twisted against him, her own body taut with sexual tension, yet at the same time soft and liquid as it readied itself for him. Impatient now, she stepped away, reaching for the hem of her leopard-print top. She pulled the top over her head and ran her fingers through her tousled hair, wanting to look good for him even though she knew that once they hit the bed, her hair would be hopelessly messed.
When she undid the front clasp of her lacy black bra, Aaron’s hands were there to peel off the garment and then cup her breasts. Her nipples were already hard, but when he teased them they tightened further, to the point of pain.
With a soft moan, she attacked the buttons of his shirt. A nice shirt, white with stripes that brought out the blue in his eyes. But it had to go. And so did the tailored trousers, because she wanted what was trapped behind that bulging fly.
Somehow, with hands getting in each other’s way, with muffled curses and breathy laughs, they managed to get each other stripped naked. And then they were on her bed, still tangled, legs twining, hands stroking greedily, kissing and smiling. They rolled, facing each other, then her on top, then him. At some point he’d had the foresight to find a condom, and when he picked up the packet she took it from him, ripped it open, and rolled the sheath onto him in a long caress that had him cursing again.
And then he lowered himself as she raised her open legs to wrap them around his waist. He entered her in one slow, steady thrust that took him straight into her core, and she let out a sigh of relief and satisfaction. Her man, here and now, their bodies merged.
As he thrust in and out, she met his movements, tilting her pelvis up, twisting so he hit every pleasure spot. The only sounds were wordless ones: sighs, whimpers, moans. All the words had been said and now their bodies took over, communicating in a language more primitive and straightforward. Speaking of lust, yes, but also of trust, affection, and commitment.
As tension peaked in her body, Eden wondered if the day would come when, at the point of climax, she would cry out, “I love you, Aaron.” Right now, it seemed entirely likely.
Even if she wasn’t ready for those words, she couldn’t keep quiet. “Oh yes, Aaron,” she whispered against his cheek as he pumped harder and faster, stroking every humming nerve to fever pitch. And then, as her body clenched around him and burst apart, she cried, “Oh, yes!”
Chapter Seventeen
“It’s pretty out here, isn’t it?” Eden sounded a little surprised as she glanced up at him.
“It is,” Aaron agreed. It was Sunday, late morning, and they were walking in Gatineau Park, a wilderness park covering more than 350 square kilometers. “I can’t believe you never came here and it’s less than half an hour’s drive from downtown.”
“I’ve never hung out with outdoorsy people. I’m glad Kelsey knew about this place.”
Eden had told him she’d asked her sister to recommend activities Aaron might enjoy. That was after spending all of Saturday downtown, with Eden giving him a city tour. He’d been interested to see Parliament Hill and the Supreme Court of Canada and had admired the old-world architecture of the Château Laurier and the artwork at the National Gallery. He’d been intrigued to learn that the Rideau Canal froze over in winter and people skated on it, including some who commuted to work that way. But it was all so city, and he’d had his fill of cities by the time he was sixteen.
Today, it was nice to smell country air as he and Eden walked along a well-used trail through a grove of maple trees. The park reminded him of Destiny’s in summer, being overrun by people. It was nice that so many folks were outside enjoying themselves this way rather than hunkered inside staring at video games, but he preferred more solitude. He thought with nostalgia of the secret spot he’d shared with Eden, and how they’d made love in the sunshine. Somehow, he doubted they’d find a secluded spot today. But maybe if he lived in Ottawa and explored the more remote areas of Gatineau Park—or, even better, rented a small plane and flew over it—he’d come across one.
He was doing his best to remain open-minded about Ottawa.
He and Eden passed a family group who were meandering slowly to accommodate a white-haired woman with a cane and a dad pushing a baby in a stroller. Okay, that was a nice sight, seeing three generations spending the day together.
His cell, tucked in his jeans pocket, buzzed. He extracted it, hoping there wasn’t an emergency at Blue Moon Air. No, it was his sister’s name on the screen. “Sorry,” he told Eden, “I need to take this.” He stepped off the trail and she came with him, standing a few feet away with her back to him, giving him at least the illusion of privacy.
“Miranda? Is everything okay?”
“I’m being evicted.” She sounded discouraged.
“What? But I sent you money for the rent.”
“I know. But I didn’t ask you until it was already overdue, and it isn’t the first time I’ve been late. The bottom line is, the landlord’s girlfriend wants the apartment, so he used the late rent as an excuse to evict me. Without a month’s notice. Ariana and I have a day to pack up and get out.”
“That can’t be legal.” He kept his voice low as the three-generation group wandered past.
She huffed. “And what, I’m going to go hire a lawyer?”
“I could help you with that.”
&nbs
p; “No, Aaron. For God’s sake!”
“So you’re calling to ask if I can front you the rent for a new apartment?”
When she didn’t respond, he said, “Miranda? Are you still there?”
“Yes. So, uh, I’m not looking for more money.”
“What, then?” Pride was, in general, a good attribute—but Miranda’s stubborn pride was hurting her and her daughter. As if to reinforce that thought, a young couple walked down the path with a little blond girl between them. The kid was dressed in shades of purple and her hair was neatly braided. Aaron wanted his niece to have the same opportunities in life as this child. The girl noticed him watching and gave a shy smile and a finger wiggle. He forced a smile and waved back as he waited for his sister to answer.
Finally, in a subdued voice, Miranda said, “Is the offer still open? To stay with you on Destiny?”
Really? She was actually considering it?
“If it’s not, no problem,” she said quickly, making him realize that, in his shock, he’d gone silent.
“No, of course you’re welcome. There’s a big bedroom for you and Ariana, with lots of light. I remember how you hate small, dark rooms.” They both did. There’d been too many of those when they were growing up. Cramped, dark, noisy, smelly. With cockroaches and sometimes rats.
“I do,” she said in a small voice, sounding quite different from her normal breezy self.
He moved a couple of steps farther, facing away from the trail and from Eden. Leaning against the trunk of a tall maple, he breathed in pure country air and watched the shifting patterns of light and shadow as the sun beamed through a canopy of leaves. On Destiny, his sister and niece could have all the light and fresh air they could imagine. But from the day he and Miranda had arrived on the island and faced their grandparents’ unconcealed resentment, she had hated the place. “Why now? Every time I’ve offered, you’ve said no. What’s different this time?”
He heard a sniffle, and when she answered her voice quavered. “I’ve reached the end of my rope. I need to give Ariana a better life and I can’t do it on my own.”