Over the weekend, she had finally announced her pregnancy. She’d told Makayla and Tami not long after taking the test, but she’d sworn them to secrecy. It had been a difficult choice to keep it a secret, but she had wanted to make it through at least the first trimester before telling others. Although if she’d thought she could have gotten away without telling anyone until the baby was born and she knew it was healthy, she would have. She lived in fear of miscarrying because then she’d have to survive more condolences. And in this particular instance, she would prefer to grieve in solitude if she suffered yet another loss.
But she’d made it, so with Makayla’s help, she’d spread the news. As she’d thought, most, if not all, the people that heard reacted with how fortunate she was to still have a piece of Franklin. And she was, but it was also difficult going through the milestones of the pregnancy without him by her side. Especially since he had been the one most eager to have a baby.
With slow movements, Grace opened the envelope and slid the small card out.
Congratulations on the baby, Grace!
You’ll make a terrific mom.
Bennett
She reached out to touch the soft petals of the flowers, thinking of all the ways Bennett had helped her over the past three months. Just like every member of his family, he’d been there for her whenever she’d needed it. Given the nature of their relationship, most of his help had come as her boss, giving her time off when she needed it. He’d been super understanding on the days when she just couldn’t make it into work. He hadn’t known about her pregnancy but had given her the time off regardless.
The morning sickness had continued to plague her, but thankfully it had become more predictable so that she was able to work her schedule around it. Combined with the grief, however, the tiredness had been more difficult to deal with. It had been fairly constant while the waves of grief had come at the most unexpected times. She was grateful that both the morning sickness and the tiredness had eased off most days now as the first trimester had ended even as the grief had continued.
Sometimes it completely overwhelmed her that she was going to be responsible for a baby all by herself. Oh, she knew that Makayla and her family would always be there to help, but at the end of the day, the baby would be her responsibility.
Her crazy hormonal emotions had remained consistent, however. Whether it was a particularly touching movie or a funny commercial, her emotions could swing without warning. Thankfully, the nightmares had become less frequent since she’d found out she was pregnant. She still had dreams that left her emotionally wrung out, but the horror-filled nightmares didn’t plague her like they had in the early weeks following Franklin’s death. She had no idea why they’d pretty much stopped, but she was grateful.
“Mom said she has the dresses out at the house,” Makayla said as she appeared beside her desk. “Oh, those are beautiful.” She leaned forward to take a sniff of the roses. “Who are they from?”
“Bennett,” Grace said as she laid the card and envelope on her desk.
“Really?” Makayla’s brows lifted as she straightened. “Well, that was…sweet of him.”
Grace nodded because it really had been sweet of him to do that for her. Flowers themselves were always nice, but to have him pick them out in that way with a color for each gender and then a white one said that he took the time to place the order, hadn’t just grabbed what was on hand.
Makayla settled her hip on the desk. “So, are you ready for the big move?”
“Sort of. I’m still not sure what to do with Franklin’s stuff. I just can’t bring myself to give it away.”
“You should just rent a storage unit and put it away for now. Maybe you’ll feel better able to deal with stuff at a later date. There’s no reason you have to rush to give it away or anything like that. I don’t think anyone expects that of you.”
Grace considered Makayla’s suggestion, and it felt like an option she could live with. She didn’t necessarily want to move all Franklin’s things with her, but she didn’t want to get rid of them yet either. Storing them, for the time being, was probably the best idea.
After the wedding—which was in two weeks—there would be a major shuffle at the Callaghan apartment building. Ethan and Sierra—who were staying in the two-bedroom apartment across from Bennett’s—were going to be moving into the three-bedroom apartment on the top floor with Makayla. Tami had decided to take the vacant one-bedroom on the main floor. That left Ethan and Sierra’s place for Grace.
She hadn’t been too keen on moving back into the apartment with Tami and Makayla again when Makayla had first suggested it, particularly with the wedding not too far in the future. But as her pregnancy progressed, the idea of being close to Makayla, Tami and the rest of the Callaghan-McFadden family had started to sound appealing. So when Ethan and Makayla had proposed the apartment shuffle, she had readily agreed. Once the couple returned from their honeymoon, they would begin to move everyone around. Tami had already started to move her stuff into the vacant one bedroom, but Grace’s move would wait until after the wedding.
“I called one of the agents Franklin worked with and met with him about listing the condo. He said I should have no trouble getting it sold for the price I want.”
“That’s good. A relief I’m sure.”
Grace nodded. “Everything okay for the wedding? No last-minute glitches on anything?”
“Nope. We’re all good,” Makayla said with a wide smile.
Grace was looking forward to her friend’s wedding, though she felt a little awkward being matron of honor since Bennett was the best man. It was hard not to think about the feelings she’d once had, and the decision she’d made all those years ago to never get into a relationship with Bennett. She felt guilty at times, thinking about her old feelings for Bennett even as she grieved for Franklin. But the feelings she had for Bennett went back so much further than the ones she’d had for Franklin.
She had truly come to love Franklin, and the feelings she’d had for Bennett had definitely faded…but apparently, they’d never gone completely away. And now that she was finding herself in situations where Bennett was present a lot more, memories of those feelings had begun to surface. The problem was that she didn’t want them. They would be the last thing she needed on top of everything else she was dealing with.
“Well, I guess someone beat me to it,” Mitch announced as he strode toward them, his gaze on the vase of flowers on her desk. In his left hand, he held a bouquet of roses. “These are for you, Gracie.”
With a smile, Grace stood and took the flowers from him, motioning for him to lean over the desk so she could press a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you, sweetie.”
Mitch had a grin on his face as he straightened. “So, who beat me to the punch?”
“That would be Bennett,” Makayla informed him.
With a sigh, Mitch crossed his arms. “That dude is so on top of everything, I can’t imagine why he thinks he needs his own secretary.”
Grace frowned as she turned to look at Makayla. “Bennett is getting a secretary?”
Makayla was also frowning…at Mitch. She turned back to Grace, a placating look on her face. She held out her hands as she said, “It’s just something that’s being discussed. After all, you’ll need to train someone to take over for you while you’re on maternity leave.”
Grace hadn’t thought about how that would work. She couldn’t really envision—at that particular moment—taking the full maternity and parental leave she was legally entitled to, which could be almost a year. This job was important to her. She’d had it since she’d graduated from the University of Winnipeg with a fairly useless degree in English once she’d decided not to tack on the necessary courses in order to become a teacher. Steve Callaghan had offered her the job of receptionist at their company when Makayla had stepped into the role of office manager with her business administration degree. It had worked well for the past eight years, but what if they brought in som
eone to cover for her who they ended up liking better?
“Hey.” Makayla nudged her shoulder. “It’ll be fine.”
Grace clutched the flowers as she sat back down, not feeling at all reassured. Usually, she wasn’t insecure about things like that, but right then with so much uncertainty in her life, she didn’t need it in her job as well. It had been the one place she’d felt safe, and that was why she’d decided to come back to work after Franklin’s death. Now she didn’t know what to think. What to feel.
“Seriously, sweetie,” Makayla said as she rubbed her back. “You’re always going to have a place here. You’re irreplaceable.”
She nodded, needing for Makayla to move out of her reassuring mode. If Makayla kept up with it, she was going to end up crying. Grace looked up and gave her friend a smile. “Of course I’m irreplaceable.”
Makayla stared at her for a moment then smiled back. “Well, we’d better get Mitch’s flowers into a vase. Can’t have them wilting by the end of the day.”
“Sorry, I didn’t even think about bringing a vase,” Mitch said as he rubbed the back of his neck.
“I think we have something in the lunchroom we can use,” Grace said as she stood back up, the flowers in her hands.
Makayla went with her, and they were able to find something that would hold the flowers. Once she’d set them back at Grace’s desk, Makayla headed back to her office leaving Grace alone with her thoughts.
She tried to work through her usual morning routines. Email. Phone calls. Opening mail. Sorting it. All the while, her stomach churned, but it wasn’t from the pregnancy for a change.
Finally, she pushed back from her desk and headed down the hallway to Bennett’s office. She wasn’t sure why she was coming to him. Maybe because she thought—hoped—he’d be straight with her while Makayla would keep trying to protect her feelings.
As she stepped into his open doorway, Grace stood watching Bennett for a moment. He had abandoned his suit coat and just wore his light gray button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled to his elbows. He was on the phone and looking down at his desk where he was making notes as he talked. She had just decided to come back later…if she still felt the need to…when he reached out to hang up the phone and spotted her. He froze for a moment, his brows drawing down over his dark eyes.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Grace asked before her nerve completely deserted her.
Her words seemed to shake Bennett loose from whatever had caused him to freeze at her appearance. “Yes. Of course. Have a seat.” He got to his feet as he gestured to the chair across from him, waiting until she’d sat down before settling back into his own chair. “What can I do for you?”
“First of all, thank you for the flowers. They’re beautiful.”
Bennett smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “You’ve very welcome. And congratulations again.”
“Thank you.” Grace shifted, pressing her fisted hands into her lap. “Uh. Mitch mentioned that you’re going to be hiring a secretary.”
Bennett’s expression smoothed out as he grabbed the pen he’d been using just a few minutes ago. “Yes. We have been discussing that. Since Denton Homes had that scandal about the quality of their work, we’ve ended up with a lot more inquiries and potential work. That means we’re going to get busier because we’re not going to let this opportunity pass us by. Getting someone else to help you out will make sure you’re not overwhelmed.”
“You don’t think I can handle it?” Grace asked, well aware of the defensive tone in her voice but seeming unable to control it.
“That’s not it at all, Grace,” Bennett said as he sat forward, resting his forearms on his desk. “We had been discussing it already, but the news of your pregnancy has just reinforced the fact that it would be a good idea. This way, you’ll have help as the pregnancy progresses in case you need to take time off. The job as receptionist is always yours, Grace, but you may find your priorities shifting as your due date gets closer. This way you can feel free to focus on other things because you know there’s someone who can cover for you.”
It all sounded so logical, so why did Grace feel like covering her face with her hands and crying? It felt like decisions were being made about her life without even consulting her. She hated feeling so out of control—both of her emotions and her life. From the moment Franklin had died, her life had changed without her permission. And now she had to deal with this.
Taking a deep breath, Grace tried to gather her scattered emotions, so she didn’t melt down in front of Bennett. “Okay. Thank you for your clarification.”
Grace started to get to her feet, eager to escape Bennett’s office as she questioned the emotions that had driven her to come there in the first place.
“Grace, wait a minute,” Bennett said, getting to his feet.
She sank back into the chair, her gaze on her hands.
“Are you okay?”
Grace clasped her hands tightly together in her lap, hating herself for letting her emotions get the better of her. They were so near the surface all the time now, but she couldn’t let them dictate her actions like this. She took a deep breath, glancing over when there was movement beside her chair. Bennett had dropped to his haunches beside her, one hand on the back of the chair, the other covered hers. She looked down at their hands then up at his face, meeting his concerned dark gaze.
When she blinked, the tears that had been pricking at the back of her eyes spilled over. Grace tried to get to her feet, but Bennett tightened his grip on her hands.
“What’s wrong, Gracie?” His voice was low and heavy with concern. “Tell me what I can do to make this better.”
She shook her head, unable to speak. Then, without warning, Bennett slipped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. Grace closed her eyes and pressed her forehead against his neck and let the tears flow. Although let might be an inaccurate description. She had no control over her emotions, and she didn’t have the strength right then to fight them.
9
Bennett remembered that one of the websites he’d visited after hearing news of Grace’s pregnancy had said that an expecting woman’s emotions could be all over the map. It was just such a shock to see her meltdown like this, especially in his presence. Even in the time since Franklin’s death, he could count on one hand the number of times he’d seen her cry. And on two hands the numbers of times in total he’d seen her cry since they’d first met. Which was why it was a bit unnerving to have her crying in his arms.
It wasn’t that Bennett thought she hadn’t cried at all outside of those times he’d seen her, but it appeared that for the most part, she didn’t feel comfortable letting him see her reduced to tears. That thought would have hurt him immensely as a teen, but now, Bennett knew that experiences could dictate actions in a way others might not understand. For sure he hadn’t understood Grace’s actions when everything had happened—or hadn’t happened, as it were—between them all those years ago, but over time, he’d just stopped trying to figure it all out. It was less painful that way.
So while he understood that hormones might be fueling the current emotional meltdown, Bennett still wasn’t sure what to do with the weeping woman he held. He’d meant to give her a hug, thinking then she’d pull herself together and move on with her day. Now he had to figure out how to give Grace what she needed while protecting himself. He’d accepted that the feelings he’d had for Grace were still present in his heart, but he’d been working to figure out the balance between being a supportive friend while not getting too emotionally involved.
“Bennett, have you seen….” Makayla’s voice trailed off as Bennett looked up to see his sister standing in his doorway. “Grace? What’s going on?”
Wasn’t that the question of the century? He felt Grace take a shuddering breath before she began to pull away. Bennett made no effort to stop her movement, relieved that his sister was stepping in to help. He had absolutely no cl
ue what to do with a weeping, pregnant woman. No clue.
“Are you okay, sweetie?” Makayla asked as she dropped to her knees beside Grace. “Is this about us hiring someone?”
Bennett watched as Grace brushed her fingertips over her damp cheeks. She looked over at Makayla. “Who knows?” Her shoulders slumped. “I guess that’s part of it. I just…don’t want to lose this job.”
“You’re not losing anything, Gracie,” Makayla said. “But you have to admit that things are changing. You’re going to have a baby who needs you, and this job will not be as important. It will always be here for you, but we need to prepare for the times when you can’t be at the office. Whoever we hire won’t be there to replace you but to assist you. And you’ll be back at the apartment block with the rest of us. You’re not losing anything, sweetie. Change may be coming, but we’re right here with you.”
Bennett had never been so grateful for his sister. Makayla was often a pain in the neck, but right then, she had all the right words for Grace. Perhaps they should have included Grace in more of their discussions about hiring an assistant for her. He realized now that they had caused her even more hurt by excluding her.
Grace nodded as she took a deep breath. “I’m sorry.”
“Nothing to be sorry for,” Bennett said as he got to his feet. “I realize now that we could have handled this all a little better.”
She glanced at him, meeting his gaze for a couple of seconds. “Thank you for thinking of me.”
Always.
That immediate thought took Bennett off-guard. He turned and walked behind his desk, not wanting to think too much about that. He sat down, watching as Makayla took the seat beside Grace.
“Why don’t we have a meeting tomorrow,” Bennett suggested. “We can discuss how to make this all work. Your input is important, Grace, so don’t be afraid to give your thoughts. Okay?”
For the Love of Grace: A Christian Romance (The Callaghans & McFaddens Book 2) Page 8