"She wouldn't be happy at all," he answered abruptly and got to his feet. "Let's just keep it the way it is."
"But she's staying!" argued Danny.
The Moals had reacted. The young nymph girl ran from Freddie, twittering anxiously. The daksha called Red began to mutter nervously and to tug at Jerry's hand. Some of the blind Moals were already darting into the forest.
"They're telling me it's late. I have to go."
"Jerry," Danny persisted, "we're all staying, except for the hiber crew." He grinned ruefully. "If I had my druthers I'd choose the Earth for me and Freddie. There's just as much to do even there. But since we're all going to be Servers here, let's do it right. You owe it to Lalille."
Jerry's face hardened in unaccustomed anger. "I owe it to Lalille to stay to hell out of her life!"
"Bull! Where'd you get that idea?"
The pain-filled eyes sought them both. His mouth trembled from an inner conflict. "You heard the Lahas. Unrealized Man is the eternal contaminant! That's me. I'm a jinx, damn it! I'll keep things the way they are!"
When he turned to go, Freddie grasped his arm. "Jerry now you just wait a minute!" He stared at her, startled by the sudden firmness of her voice. "You damned fool, we love you! And so does Lalille!" He tried to pull away but she grasped both of his hands. "You come here and sit down, young man. There's something you've got to know about yourself!"
"Now look, Freddie, this is no time for a shrink session!"
"It's exactly the time," she insisted, "before you foul up your life for good!"
Danny moved in and helped to coax him back, gently forcing him to sit down. Freddie continued swiftly as she sat down to face him.
"You star jocks are so chauvinistic you forget a girl's professional shingle when she has one," she told him swiftly. "That story of Buli gave me a clue. I can't go into your babyhood – we'd need a couple of years." Again, Jerry moved to escape, but he sat down heavily when she added, "However, we can start with that time in sick bay, remember? The day you were practically bawling in my arms over the death of Fritters."
His eyes widened fearfully and he grimaced in desperation. "I don't want to hear it!"
"Great!" said Freddie. "That means you've got to. Danny, bat him over the head if he moves. This is a vital operation. It's been coming on ever since I made my graphs of the monitor tapes. I think I've got the clue to what makes Jerry run."
Danny could have loved her all over again. She came on like a chesty, aggressive sister to Jerry, deftly forcing her strength and persuasion on him, clinically opening his psyche to his own view – "like an onion", she said, "layer by layer."
Guilt was the basis of her attack. Maybe Jerry had fallen into a guilt pattern like many people, due to some infantile or childhood experience. There wasn't time to go into it but what usually happened was an intra-psychic struggle that put up obstacles to conscious knowing. Perhaps it was some such repression that had made him volunteer for the star trip. Then came Fritters' tragic death, and Jerry had blamed himself for that, as well as the death of Holberg later.
Danny wondered how all this tied to Lalille, but he quickly developed a new appreciation of psychiatry as Freddie went on, lancing into Jerry's secret wounds like a surgeon.
"You believed these things about yourself. You really felt you were a contaminant or a Jinx. But that got tangled up with your real nature. You're a deep type, Jerry, intuitive and sympathetic, but conscientious as hell."
A memory flash brought back Sam's words to Danny. "It could be a form of self-rejection. Ironical, since he doesn't see his own hidden strength." More than this he recalled the Lily's astrological comments on Jerry. "Cancer and moon resourceful, creative, protective, intuitive understanding, human sympathy and conscientiousness, wants peace and harmony above all. As for Scorpio rising: secret tenacity and aloofness. His buried star is Mars, God of war, defender of the innocent, scourge of evil."
As if to corroborate this, Freddie was saying: "That makes you a Galahad, a shining knight in armor, in fact, a thick-headed purist! Now I'm talking about sex, sweetie, and if you start sweating, just let it roll. We're getting down to basics."
Jerry got up in spite of her. "Stop it!" he yelled. "That's none of your business!" His powerful fist gripped his spear threateningly.
"Oh, isn't it? You're our business, passionate brother. You've got to hear it out!"
Jerry tensed but suddenly realized he couldn't harm the two of them. They had him then. He broke into sweat when Danny sat him down again. Soon he was listening, openmouthed, with tears in his eyes.
"You took a few more trips to the Pit after that," Freddie continued. "Your libido went all to hell. I'll tell you exactly why. The sex object becomes the thing you have to defend. Of all sex objects, Lalille is the ineffable sanctum sanctorum! I think you tried just once that night on the temple terrace, but when that blew up in your face, you had had it. The cage was the last straw, a transition point. You were so tortured by the pain or anguish you thought you had caused Lalille that you went into a second stage of suppression. That, my sweet, is technically known as surrogation. You hate violence, you love beauty and innocence and freedom and peace, the orchid bit and all that. So as the great conscientious protector, you punish yourself! This whole unbalanced hermit seclusion of yours is nothing but a negative sexual syndrome. It symbolizes withdrawal from the adored object of love. Hiding away from the world becomes a compulsion neurosis.
"Why were you able to get Buli pregnant? I'll tell you. In your mind she wasn't real. She was a fantasy surrogate for Lalille, someone who couldn't be hurt because you were both in fantasyland. That, my libidinous friend, is known as wish fulfillment!"
Jerry struggled up again, visibly shaken and gleaming with sweat. "I can't! I can't!" he pleaded piteously. "Please, don't say anymore!"
"Just one thing, Jerry. You really are a frigging Galahad. You're stronger than you think, and you're needed. Sure, these darling little people deserve your protection and strength, but so does Lalille!"
He turned but she stopped him almost angrily. "For God's sake, Jerry, quit shielding your soul! Go do something dirty! Face up to the ugly side of the world and know how really clean you are! In the dwelling places of evil you are not!"
He paused to stare at her as if entranced.
The spell was broken by his fairie retinue. Their twittering and chatter increased excitedly as they fled into the forest, alerted by something the humans hadn't yet sensed.
Suddenly, Kenny Makart came running breathlessly into the clearing. "Hey, Danny, where've you been? We've found something! Stockton had the air car rigged with a tracer. Do you know what that means?" He failed to see Jerry for the simple reason that he had vanished along with his little people.
There was no time for conversation because the next thing they heard was the roar of engines overhead. The scoutship was there, drifting and shifting about like an angry hornet. The bullhorn boomed out over the jungle.
"Attention, all members of the mission Attention – all Earthmen and natives who hear this! This is Marshal Pike speaking! In the name of His Majesty, King Alonso the First, the monarchy of Terra Nova hereby declares a state of war! This war is aimed at the enemies of the kingdom – that is, the Talavat Nation and all insurgents and traitors of the realm. Attention. Your only choice is unconditional surrender!"
The bulky convertiplane drifted slowly onward, and the brutal announcement was translated, probably by a Talavat slave. The native version called out to Ravano to recognize Alonso as his king. There was no time to talk because explosions were heard, followed by a widespread rattle of guns.
"Gas bombs!" yelled Danny.
"They're attacking by land, too!" shouted Makart, already on the run.
Danny grabbed Freddie. "Come on! Let's get to the air car!"
Freddie ran with him down the north trail as they followed Makart. The forest stillness was shattered by the sounds of bomb explosions, machine and single-shot rifle fire, a
nd the war cries of Earthmen, Golaks and Tallies alike. Apparently Ravano's Krias had forewarned him of this even before the Oracle. The woods were teeming with hundreds of charging lancers. Bjornson and Henshaw had been right. The Skipper had underestimated the Duke and the Pike. It was too late now. The die was cast.
Danny thought bitterly of himself and Freddie and their idyll together. Their dreams had lasted a fragile moment. Man the contaminant had entered Paradise, and war walked the land.
CHAPTER XIX
"The Skipper's been hit!"
Burt Henshaw's shouted announcement was almost lost in the strident sound of the running battle that had exploded around them. Yet for Danny it was like a sudden wound, seemingly flesh deep but subtly gnawing at vitals. As he clutched Freddie's hand and plunged through dark green foliage after Makart's darting figure, he sensed the fatality of those words. They affected the hand he was holding. Irretrievability, the shattering dream, a parting forever.
She didn't see it at first, being only conscious of his firm grip and the need for shelter. A ragged clatter of machine fire had preceded them, indicating a concentration of combat around the fallen air car. Many of the insurgents had arrived with heavy weapons to counter the land attack, and the lancers had come in countless numbers, driving the enemy back. Silvery wisps of nerve gas were drifting ominously through the branches overhead, and the immediate need was to seek refuge inside the aircraft itself. She was distracted, too, by Stockton's staring eyes. She had to step over his corpse and duck around the Talavat spear shaft that was implanted in his chest.
Inside the air car was another confusion. There was an overcrowding of sweating, bearded and bronzed insurgents, all of them trying to center on Lyshenko who was babbling insanely.
"Crisis call, mode one!" shouted the wounded Skipper. "All officers and crew to stations! P.Q., take an entry! This is war!"
He was blinded by the blood welling from a crash across his brow. His yellow uniform was also turning crimson as other bullet wounds in his chest slowly spilled out his life. Freddie took over the duties of medic and helped strip off his jacket.
"He's going fast!" said Poyntner worriedly.
Lyshenko's mind cleared momentarily after Freddie managed to stanch the bleeding and give him an energizing hypo. He recognized Danny's supporting hand and grasped it.
"Captain Troy – you're first in command!" he rasped out urgently. "Where's the transcorder?" When they argued with him, trying to get him to relax, he struggled up against restraining hands, still powerful in spite of his waning condition.
"No time for this!" he protested stubbornly. "I am the law! Give me my transcorder!"
Weak as Elliott was, he gave him the instrument, and Lyshenko clutched it to him in feverish desperation. "Log entry," he started to say, but he was interrupted. Danny's transceiver was buzzing wildly.
Boozie's voice was far away, but at maximum volume. The words came through a crackle of static. The Skipper grasped Danny's wrist to listen. Boozie was speaking to them from outer space.
"We had to grab the shuttle," he reported swiftly. "It seems Alonso wants to block any experiments with the cosmoscope – and that's not all, baby. His Majesty has flipped his royal wig. I think he's out to pull a historical precedent, the Cortez bit. The life-pod's in danger. If any of you can get through the battle lines, your last chance for a hiber trip is now!"
Lyshenko snapped questions at him and got a few quick answers. Boozie and Bruno had made it out to the star ship's main frame in synchronous orbit. They were installing the last available fuel cores in the laser pile. In the confusion of escape, both men had lost track of Fitz.
When Boozie signed off, Danny and Poyntner had to shout for silence as everybody tried to talk at once. In the middle of this came a pounding on the door. The gas danger had evidently abated. When the hatch opened, there were Vinet and Zellon, and in came the most unexpected visitor of all: King Ravano in person.
He stood in the low-roofed entrance, longhaired and copper-toned, wearing his golden headband and kvakule feathered symbol, with the multiple necklaces of his royal office dangling down his scar-marked chest. Aware of his station and the burden of responsibility at this moment, his penetrating brown eyes took in Danny, Lyshenko, Poyntner, Elliott, and Frederica, recognizing their need for a final answer.
Instead of speaking at once, he moved forward to Lyshenko and squatted down beside him while touching his shoulder. "The Dragon Chief turns to the sunset path at a time of change, when last words are spoken in truth."
Danny translated as the brief conference reached a bleak conclusion. Ravano maintained that he had fulfilled his pledge. His armed forces had driven back the misguided enemy, and war was done. The winged vessels of Kimbu Dyota (the White-haired One) were now assembled and the rest of the fleet was ready. The main emigration was underway. He offered asylum for the Dragon Chief's people and promised his protection.
When Danny and Lyshenko both insisted that the main battle was still to be fought, that the monarchy was to be overthrown, Ravano firmly refused.
"I am to watch the signs of prophecy," he answered. "The gods of prayava-kutami have spoken in their wrath. Maitluccan must go to his home again. I stand at the crossroads and look for the star of the ancient Oracle. Since it has not come, I must go forth with my people."
This was his decision. He refused to argue the point and soon withdrew. His final word was that his warriors were standing by to escort the orphaned Star Sons to the ships, should they decide to join him in the new land to the north. His parting glance was at Frederica.
Then she knew. Danny saw it in her frightened, searching eyes. The inevitable was put into words by Lyshenko.
"That leaves me with one decision," said the commander, blinded by bloodied bandages. "Troy commands! The hiber trip will be made. Alfred, join him! As to your backup, Danny, get every insurgent you can find."
Freddie could only sit there and stare in dry-eyed futility as the desperate plans were swiftly formulated. Danny thought it pointless to trouble a dying man with problems, such as the fact that the hiber crew was incomplete. Few men were technically qualified for such a mode of spaceflight. Pike and Lyshenko were definitely out. There were only himself, Poyntner, Boozie, Bruno, – and Fitz, if he could be found. A sixth man was still needed.
"Find Ogden Hapgood," Lyshenko suddenly insisted. "Tell him I order him to go. Earth must know what we've discovered." His mind apparently began to wander then. He groped for the transcorder and began to gibber into it, proclaiming the imperatives of World Council authority.
Danny was only partially aware of the excited voices around him. The men were planning how to back him up when he and Poyntner would try to take the life-pod. Diversion strategy was discussed, how to fool the roborgs. He was drawn in horrified fascination to Lyshenko as he slowly died while muttering mechanically into his ship's log. Those who had come through the temple experience, even including Poyntner, had somehow been lanced by cosmic lightnings of star wisdom. They had been changed, driven to some new stage of consciousness. For each the package had fallen away and uncaged his own star, whatever it was.
But Alex Lyshenko was the package itself. Whatever he had been intrinsically had become a hollow shell, echoing the manufactured phrases of a world cult that had misinterpreted the human dream.
"...extension of World Authority under law," were his dying words as he still strove to legislate his solutions. Unable to be a solution, he was victim rather than villain, Danny thought bitterly. He swore that he would be a substance for the Skipper's emptied shell, bringing back to Earth the end results of the mission.
There was a movement now to get Elliott and Freddie out of the ship, to turn them over to the Tally escort. They were to join the others with Ravano, Akala, Noley, and Lalille.
Danny tore his gaze from Freddie when another commotion occurred at the open hatch. Bjornson and Henshaw had just gotten word from the last insurgents who had been searching the ridge for sur
vivors of the earthquake.
"Sam didn't make it," said Alex glumly. "He must have been caught in the temple cave-in. No trace at all."
This final sorrow tore away the last veil of pretense.
Death's irretrievability placed its mark also on the reality of parting. Freddie couldn't hold back her tears, but her new fear was for someone else.
"Poor Tallullah!" she said, grasping his arm. "Don't leave her there with that madman Alonso! If you can send her to us, Danny–"
"No promises, baby. We can only try."
When the last moment really came, outside with the mounted lancers, she flew into his arms, heedless of all the men and warriors around her while Poyntner and Elliott watched in silent sympathy. "Tell them to remember the Earth dreams, Danny!" She cried openly, staring at him and pleading. "Without their damned technology they're more primitive than the Tallies! Tell them to get off their slabs! If I have to live without you, tell them that! We're not alone!" She strove to control herself while he studied her tears and brushed them away. "And we're not contaminants, damn it, not when we know! Some of us will be Servers here, and ... and..."
"Maybe it's not all so empty," he told her. "Life is bigger than all of us."
When he left her and moved through the jungle with Poyntner, Bjornson, Henshaw, and twenty other men, he still saw her face and felt her lips. He remembered the temple terrace again, that night three years ago in the moonlight. The mother-father psychosis had been cleared by her experiences. The Earth dream was the child symbol, no longer contaminated by any futility except their own. Yet she had risen above the personal dream. She could find a universal purpose here as well as on Earth. He thought then of Holy Sam and his transition stages and thresholds, a time of intervention. His Great Ones had come, delivering a message that could change the world and worlds without end.
"This is why I'm going," Danny muttered grimly.
It took a higher-consciousness thought like that to brace himself for the suicidal gamble of a hiber run, back through the Barrier – provided there would be six of them who could rescue the star ship from Alonso's final madness.
Star Quest Page 24