‘I’m ending it tonight.’
‘Really,’ he said, and then, ‘Interesting.’
Kyle whisked Hilary off to the dance floor where they danced alongside Peter and Abby. But they might have been in their own bubble.
‘Look at them, Jack. Aren’t they cute together?’
‘Adorable,’ he agreed with a grin. I jabbed him in the belly with my finger.
‘I’m going to the ladies’—dance with me when I get back?’
‘Of course,’ he said, smiling down at me.
I pushed my way through to the toilets. The room was crowded with girls fixing hair and lipstick, the thump of music competing with their gossip. With all the make-up and perfume around, I kept my distance, going all the way to the last cubicle. When I came out, Brittany was waiting for me. I stared at her, stunned. She had to have followed me in.
‘I wanna talk to you,’ she said.
‘Why?’
She used her body to block me into a corner, then, clutching my arm, put her face close to mine. It was round and red and seething. ‘You’d better watch your back, Smith.’
My blood pumped fast and I peered over her shoulder to see if anyone had noticed I was being held captive. Nobody had. The three closest girls were laughing and talking together as they repaired their make-up. I was on my own. I took a deep breath and fixed my eyes on Brittany’s.
‘What’s your problem, Brittany?’
‘You’re my problem and as soon as Jason’s finished with you, I’m gonna make you pay.’
‘You’re threatening me?’
She took a bottle of perfume out of her bag and sprayed her neck. I pulled back from her but there was nowhere to go and she was much bulkier than me—a skin full of muscle and fury. She held fast to my arm.
‘You bet I am,’ she whispered, leaning so close that her nose almost touched mine. Her perfume wafted up my nostrils, sweet and dangerous. I started to wheeze. She brought the bottle up to my face and took aim. It’d be dead easy for her to make me pay. I tried not to breathe and became giddy with the effort. A lungful of that perfume and I’d be back in hospital for a week.
‘You can go now,’ she said finally, releasing my arm when I was coughing and choking from no longer being able to hold my breath. She put her perfume back into her bag and turned and walked away.
Somehow I managed to remain standing as I scrabbled through my bag for my puffer. I found it and took a few good pulls as I hurried outside. I needed air. After a few minutes in the night to recover, I went back inside to join my friends.
‘What do you women do in the toilets?’ Jack asked, glancing at his watch.
‘There was a queue.’
I couldn’t tell him what had really happened, he’d go crazy. He took my hand and pushed a path to the dance floor. We passed Courtney dancing with Ryan. She gave me a filthy look.
‘What did I do to Courtney?’ I asked, when we found a space to dance.
‘Won my heart,’ Jack said with a grin.
I rolled my eyes.
‘I’m serious, she wanted to dance and I told her I was waiting for you.’
‘Gee thanks, that’s all I need, another jealous girl hating me.’ But I wasn’t really annoyed—I felt kind of good, which was a little bit mean and a lot confusing.
‘Speaking of jealous girls, check out Brittany and Simone,’ Jack said with an evil glint in his eyes. The girls were dancing close by—well, gyrating really and dressed in the skankiest fairy outfits I’d ever seen. ‘Imagine waking up and finding that pair collecting your first tooth. You’d superglue the rest to your gums.’
I laughed. ‘And you say you don’t bitch.’
‘I’m not bitching, I’m observing and I observe they’re one frightening pair of fairies. Brittany’s going to unleash one of her mammoth boobs any second. Look at them struggling to stay in her corset.’
‘She looks ridiculous anyway. A real fairy wouldn’t be able to open her wings with something like that in the way.’
Jack cocked one eyebrow. ‘Explain.’
‘Turn around,’ I said. He did. I reached under his cape and drew a line down his spine from between his shoulder blades to below his waist. I leaned close. ‘That’s where Leif’s wings materialised from. You see? That corset—impossible.’
Jack turned back to me. He had a wicked gleam in his eyes. ‘You’d pretty much have to get half naked to get your wings out.’
‘Pretty much.’
The gleam turned into a leery grin. ‘I’d like to see that. Get your gear off, Marla—show us what a real fairy looks like.’
‘In your dreams,’ I chuckled.
Still smiling, he put his arms around my waist and brought me close.
‘Mmm, sometimes,’ he murmured against my ear.
Outrageous flirt that he was, I never could tell when he was being serious. In any case, a shiver ran through my body, silencing me for a while. When I found my voice again I said, ‘I don’t even know what made me think about that. I’ve been so good at forgetting Leif lately.’
‘Who wouldn’t think about undressing when I’m around?’
‘I’m fairly sure you’re the one who mentioned undressing, Jack.’
He laughed and gave me a squeeze.
‘Wouldn’t it be amazing if Leif were real?’
‘Not for me.’
‘Why?’ I asked, looking up to him.
‘Well, Kyle’s already nicked one of my girls. It would be nice to keep you for myself.’ His face wore that mischievous lopsided grin that never failed to make me smile.
‘So I’m your girl.’
‘Well, aren’t you?’ His face was all serious again.
‘I guess I kind of am.’
A moment later the song changed to a slower one. Jack held me closer still and we slow danced for a while. His breath was warm against my hair and his body pressed to mine felt nice. No—more than nice, it felt lovely. Hmm, if he offered me something more than friendship right now, I wouldn’t be able to resist. I closed my eyes and lay my head on his shoulder, turned my face so that my lips just touched the base of his neck as I swayed in his arms. I wanted to kiss him and did, just a little. Subtle—I didn’t think he’d notice. But he might have, because a moment later I felt his hand slide up from where it rested on my hip to caress the bare skin between my shoulder blades. I shivered in his arms and held my breath as he leaned in and pressed a soft slow kiss to my temple. And then another. I could feel his breath at my ear, his fingers splayed on my skin. I knew that any moment now, Jack was going to whisper the words that would change our friendship to something else. We were just about to cross the line mum had drawn for us five years ago, and I realised suddenly how much I wanted to, had been wanting to.
‘Marla, I . . . ’ he started. But I didn’t get to hear what he was going to say because Jason came and spoiled our moment by cutting in. Jack resisted for a little while, held me to him as his eyes kept mine. Somehow I knew exactly what he was thinking—we had all the time in the world. There was no hurry. He smiled and squeezed me closer for a moment before leaning down to kiss my cheek. It was a chaste kiss—one that brought me back to our friendship. He released me then and I watched him step away.
‘Don’t know if I liked the look of that,’ Jason said as he put his arms around me. The words were light but his tone was anything but, and the way he held me practically screamed mine.
‘Jack’s my best friend,’ I said, noticing for the first time just how much shorter than Jack Jason was.
‘Relax,’ Jason chuckled. ‘What’s up with you tonight anyway?’ He took my arms, which hung by my side, and put them around his neck before returning his to my waist.
‘Nothing’s up.’
He leaned close and whispered, ‘Are you sure? You seem pissed about something.’
‘What was with you not wanting to see my parents tonight?’
‘Is that all it is?’ He laughed.
‘No, but I think if you liked me you’d want to get to
know them.’
‘I do, but I want to get to know you first—that’s all babe.’ He leaned towards me and I knew he was coming in for a kiss. I’d managed to avoid it so far. I went to pull away, but he was fast, his lips locking to mine before I could protest. And then all I could think about was Leif. I could hear him in my mind, his voice calling my name and for an insane moment, I felt like I was betraying him. And then he was yelling, demanding I get away from Jason, his voice getting louder and more persistent until it was an all-consuming booming in my head, drowning out every other sound in the room.
‘Marla!’
I was torn apart from Jason who, in the same moment, lay sprawled on the floor. And outshining all else around him was Leif, exactly as I recalled him from my dreams—stunning, naked from the hips up and breathtakingly beautiful. I had to be dreaming—either that or I truly had succumbed to madness. I stared up at him, squeezed my eyes shut, opened them again, scrubbed at them with my fingers. But the vision remained—Leif, my betrothed, in all of his radiant glory, his dark and hypnotic eyes holding mine prisoner. And then I realised he didn’t look exactly as I remembered him. He was simmering with anger. No, that was an understatement; his eyes glittered and flashed with a wildness I’d never seen before.
He reached for me wordlessly, and as I slipped my hand inside of his, hot tingles pinged through my fingers and up into my arm. I cried out, unsure whether the sensation was more pleasure or pain. Everyone around us had stopped dancing and stood watching the spectacle before them, but Leif only had attention for me.
‘Marla, I have gone to great lengths to find you. Do you know how many humans possess the name of Smith in your region? I have come to meet with you and this is how I find you? Sharing yourself with this . . . human.’ He shot Jason—who’d since clambered to his feet—a condemning look before turning his fury back to me. ‘You belong to me!’ He clenched a fist to his heart, paused for a moment before demanding, ‘What have you to say?’
I was vaguely aware of the scene we’d created, of the attention Leif was commanding, of Jason, my friends and a horde of others watching, mesmerised. But how could any of this be real? It couldn’t.
‘Am I dreaming, Leif? Is that what this is?’
The anger seemed to leach from his eyes and his voice was softer when he said, ‘You do not dream. But what have you to say of how I find you?’
‘You’re real? I thought you were just a dream.’ I shook my head and pinched myself hard, sending a shot of pain through my arm and a grimace to my face.
‘Ah, don’t do that.’ He touched my arm and the pain was replaced with soothing heat.
Jason looked at Leif and said, ‘Hang on a minute, mate, I don’t know who you are, but Amy, is my girlfriend. What’s with this Marla crap anyway? It’s bad enough her fag friend calls her that.’
I wanted to slap him.
Leif turned his attention to Jason and watched him as though he were the most loathsome of bugs. He was more than a full head taller than Jason, and must have been a formidable sight to him.
‘Leave now,’ Leif commanded, in a way that made it clear he was accustomed to being obeyed. Jason looked nervous, but I had to give it to him, he stood his ground.
‘I don’t think so,’ he said. He was shaking in his Prince Charming boots and tugging at my arm, trying to make me release my hold on Leif’s hand. He looked like a pussycat standing up to a tiger. ‘Amy’s my girlfriend.’ It was almost a whimper.
Leif’s eyes became impossibly intense as they swept rapidly around the room. Then his attention returned to Jason for a short moment before coming back to me. I became hypnotised by him, but was vaguely aware of a change in the room. Everything seemed to be speeding up, becoming frantic. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jason grip his head and fall to the floor as the people who had been watching us stopped and started running around madly, bumping into each other and yelling incomprehensible things. Leif just stood where he was, holding my hands, his eyes locked with mine as Jason leaped up and ran screaming from the room.
This scene went on for a few more moments, during which time Leif leaned down and kissed my forehead. ‘I must go,’ he said and released my hands.
‘Don’t!’ I reached for him, hooked my fingers into his jeans. ‘Please stay.’
‘I will come to you tonight, Marla.’ He ran his fingers down the side of my face, removed my hand from where it was tangled into his belt loop and kissed my palm. Then he turned and walked away, weaving his way through the heaving mass of teenagers.
I stood stunned for a moment, watching the door through which he’d disappeared. Leif was real and he was coming to see me tonight. I grinned a stupid big grin and turned to Jack, standing nearby.
‘He’s real, Jack.’
‘Who’s real?’
‘Leif, of course! Who’d you think it was?’
Jack pressed his hand to my forehead. ‘Are you all right?’ I might have laughed but he was serious.
‘That guy I was just with was Leif,’ I told him, growing anxious as I waited for a response. ‘You know: tall, built, no shirt. I saw you looking straight at him.’
‘Maybe he was one of the firies,’ he said, looking doubtful. ‘But you said no shirt, right?’
‘Firies?’
‘The place was full of them.’
‘Huh?’
Jack pointed to the stage. ‘The castle was on fire. It was crazy, fire shooting out the windows . . . ’ He frowned. ‘How could you not notice?’
‘The castle looks fine to me.’
‘Yeah, it does.’ Jack ran his fingers through his hair and scratched his head. ‘Well, the fire brigade did get here fast.’
‘Jack, can you take me and Ash home? Jason’s disappeared. I think my insanity has scared him off.’ Not that I cared. All I wanted to do was go to bed and curl into a little ball of self-pity. ‘I’m pretty sure we broke up tonight.’
‘What a shame,’ he said with a fake sad face. But I just wasn’t in the mood.
‘Please, Jack,’ I sighed.
‘Sure, come on, I’ve had enough anyway.’
‘Do you remember the tall dark-haired guy I was talking to?’ I asked Hilary and Kyle when we went to say goodbye. They had no memory of Leif either. But the thing was, I could remember them both staring straight at him.
The ride home was depressing. Ashleigh talked nonstop about some huge fight that had broken out inside the hall, while Jack’s conversation kept returning to the fire in the castle. Neither of them could believe it was possible that I’d missed both incidents. Though Jack hadn’t noticed the fight and Ashleigh hadn’t noticed the fire, they put that down to the two dramas occurring simultaneously. I wasn’t surprised I hadn’t noticed either fight or fire, as my attention had been all for my delusion.
For a brief moment tonight I had been elated, sure of Leif’s existence. Now all I had was the realisation that I was experiencing further deterioration in my mental health. I was loath to face the truth, but I had to. It’s not like anyone could have missed Leif had he actually been there. He’d outshone everyone around him. There was only one possible explanation—he hadn’t been there at all. I made a decision: in the morning I would speak to my mother about seeing a psychiatrist.
When we arrived at my place, Jack got out of the car and gave me a long hug. He held me close and stroked my back. But the magic was gone—he was my best friend again. I couldn’t remember ever feeling so miserable.
‘How was it?’ Dad asked as we came inside.
‘It was fun until most of the guys in my year got into this massive fight,’ Ashleigh told him.
Dad shook his head. ‘Nobody hurt, I hope.’
My sister tipped her head to the side as she considered. ‘I don’t really know.’
My father frowned and turned to me. ‘Did you see this fight, Amy?’
I shook my head and flopped onto the lounge.
‘You didn’t have a good time, love?’
I shrugged
. ‘Not really.’
‘That young man didn’t cheer you up?’
‘Jason?’
‘Not Jason. There was a young fellow came looking for you, seemed fairly keen to find you. I assumed he was a school friend. I hope he was a school friend!’ Dad frowned.
‘What was his name?’
He pinched his chin between his finger and thumb as he considered. I thought I might jump right out of my skin. ‘I must be losing my memory,’ he said finally. ‘But he was distinctive, that’s for sure, and very well mannered. He had a strange accent too, and no shirt on, of all things.’
‘Leif,’ I whispered, clasping my hands over my heart, my happiness restored in a miracle of a moment.
‘That’s it, Leif. He found you then?’
‘Yes! Yes he did!’ Euphoria filled me from the top of my head all the way to my toes—a great zinging joy that made its way through every fibre of my being, making me want to shriek. Somehow I kept it in but I knew my happiness showed in a grin that took over my whole face.
‘What is up with you tonight?’ Ashleigh said. ‘Your moods are all over the place.’
I couldn’t answer, was too crazed with happiness. I needed to be alone. I needed to scream. Leif was real! I wasn’t delusional. He was real and he was coming tonight. I couldn’t imagine him knocking on my door at this hour, so it must be to my dreams. I raced to my bedroom, changed into my nightie, jumped into bed and hollered into my pillow, then I shivered and trembled as I waited for sleep to come and take me to him.
An hour later I was still wide awake, my mind racing with questions. Was Leif a faery? It was a stretch but so was the fact that he existed at all. And if he was a faery, was I one too? I reached into the darkness and ran a fingertip around the outline of one ear. I’d realised a long time ago that my ears looked like they belonged on the tooth fairy. I smiled as the image of Simone and Brittany collecting teeth popped into my head. Another question occurred to me as Ashleigh climbed into bed on the other side of the room: Why couldn’t anyone remember seeing him? Was it because of the other things going on, the fire and the fight? I tossed and turned, impatient for sleep to take me to him.
Another sleepless hour passed. It was after one o’clock and I almost wept with frustration. I had never been so eager to fall asleep in my life. I heard my father heading off to bed, his footsteps passing my room, and a moment later, his bedroom door closing behind him.
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