by Diana Nixon
If only she could kill me with a stare, I would have been already dead, because the moment Tara turned to look at me, her eyes were darting flashes of anger. "If you dare so say a word of what has happened here, I swear it will be the last word in your life!" she hissed.
"Really? Are you going to shut my mouth with another kiss?"
"Just stay away from me!" Tara turned to the door again. But I couldn't let her go like that. The kiss and the sweet talk were too enjoyable to end so soon.
"I will let you know when I decide how much my silence costs," I said before she left, shutting the door behind her. I shook my head, laughing, and started getting dressed.
"Evan, is everything all right?" Eileen asked, interrupting my memories.
"Yes," I replied absently.
"What are you reading?" Christian looked at me in the rear view mirror.
"Nothing special. Watch the road," I said. Apparently my response sounded too rude, because he and Eileen shared glances, feeling the changes in my aura.
Unlike Eileen, Christian was an expert in reading auras and I was sure he knew what I was thinking about at the moment.
I looked at the diary in my hands and smiled again at the memory of my first meeting with Tara. If I had a chance to repeat that day I would do everything just the way I did, without the slightest twinge of remorse. Or maybe I would change one thing after all - I wouldn't let Tara leave that room….
Chapter 3
January 20th, 2005
Everything went wrong this morning. I was awakened at the damn crack of dawn by a loud knocking. Someone had definitely knocked on the wrong door, because when I opened it, cursing everything in the world, no one was there. The next disappointment was waiting for me in the shower. The hot water was gone. As it turned out later it was a handiwork of some of the Wizardy jokers. Personally I thought it wasn't funny at all.
Damn you, future wizards! I swore under my breath. I thought it was already too much for one morning, but karma could be such a bitch sometimes! The moment I opened the door to the audience where my first class was supposed to be, a rain of multicolored confetti poured on me.
"Oh, God!" someone exclaimed. "We thought it was Jon, Jon Walders. Today is his birthday and we wanted to surprise him."
"How sweet," I muttered, shaking off the unfortunate pieces of a failed surprise. "Too bad Mr. Walders won't see any of this."
"Oh, no! What do we do now?" groaned the girl with wavy dark-brown hair. As far as I remembered her name was Tammy.
I wasn't supposed to be late and now I felt a little guilty about ruining their plans. I put a smile on my gloomy face and said, "I have an idea. We can use magic and raise the rest of the confetti into the air. What do you think?"
"Did you say magic?" Tammy asked, surprised. "But we don't use magic, Evan. We are Vero students, remember?"
So, the girl knows my name. Nice! Wait, they don't know how to use magic?
"You are the only hereditary Wizardy among us," David said. I knew the guy. We had already had some classes together. David was shorter than me and he had chestnut hair in combination with big dark-brown eyes.
"Right." I nodded. "I keep forgetting about that. But I can do everything on my own. It's pretty simple."
"How many spells do you know?" David asked curiously.
"Umm... a few," I replied, without going into details.
On that day I was predestined to soar to the heights of fame. Apart from new confetti that I created with the help of my magical power, I filled the air of the audience with millions of multi-colored sparks and dozens of balloons. My group mates were shocked and started asking questions about the one who had taught me all the above. We almost forgot about the birthday boy who entered the room a few minutes later. Anyway, the surprise wasn't ruined and we all were happy. In addition, I got a few new fans among girls, who wouldn't stop casting me sidelong glances for the rest of our lecture.
The day turned out to be very long, but despite the morning chaos, I came back to my room in a very good mood. I missed the dinner and wanted to grab a snack, so I returned to the dining room and saw that the lights were still on. Apparently, I wasn't the only hungry student. I opened the door and ran into Tara.
"My, my! What a pleasant meeting!" I said, grinning.
"Good evening," she replied without a ghost of a smile.
"I haven't seen you for days," I added quietly, blocking her way. "And something tells me that it wasn't accidental."
"There's nothing surprising here, Evan. We are students of different faculties." Tara tried to seem calm, but I could see her aura and I knew she was nervous. "Can I go now?"
"I still think it's strange," I said, ignoring her question. "Especially considering the fact that we eat in the same dining room, have classes in the same building and... oh, right! Your bedroom is just a few doors away from mine."
"How do you... well, never mind." She shook her head. "I'm in a hurry actually, so would you be so kind as to let me go?"
We were staring at each other as if challenging each other's patience. Tara didn't move, but she didn't step back either when I leaned closer.
"You are avoiding me," I whispered, without breaking the eye contact.
"You are giving yourself too much credit, Mr. Murray."
"And you are such a tease, Miss Mackenzie." I smiled slightly. "You can't even imagine how much I enjoy our sweet talks."
"I'm glad for you, Evan. But I really need to go now."
"Let me guess - you are having a date with my brother, aren't you?
"It's none of your business."
"Oh, really? Does Kevin know about our kiss?"
Tara's cheeks flashed. "He doesn't and he will never know."
"So you think lying is fair?" I knew I was pushing the limits of her patience, but damn I couldn't help myself.
"So you think it's better to tell him about me throwing myself at his half-naked brother in his own room?"
I liked the idea. "I'd rather say at his TOTALLY naked brother. If you hadn't noticed there wasn't anything under that towel, except for...."
"That's enough, Evan!" Tara flared up, turning red. "What do you really want from me? To break up with Kevin?"
Her question made me angry. I moved closer so that now our faces were inches from each other. “I don't give a damn shit about your relationship with Kevin. The only thing I do care about is the confession."
"Whose confession?"
"Yours. All I want is you to admit that you did enjoy the kiss. Or, well, that you don't mind repeating it." I winked at her.
"What?" Tara burst out laughing. "You still hope I will admit it? And I thought you were smart enough to realize that this is the last thing I will ever do. Now, get out of my way, Evan! I don't have time for your stupid illusions."
I didn't say anything in response. I moved away, letting her escape. Yes, escape was the only word I could use to describe Tara's behavior. Just as the first time we met, today she felt something inside her heart. And so did I. The only difference was that I was brave enough to admit it. And at that very moment my conscience was sleeping peacefully somewhere at the back of my mind, giving me carte blanche for everything I wanted to do. On the one hand, I realized that I shouldn't have behaved like a selfish jerk, provoking Tara and betraying my brother. But there was something so attractive about the girl I couldn't resist.
"For God's sake, Evan! Do you still remember that all your feelings reflect in me like in a mirror?!" Eileen groaned aloud. "So if you don't want to watch me throwing myself at Christian right in front of your eyes you'd better stop reading whatever you are reading there!"
I chuckled, shaking my head. "Sorry, Love. I promise to control my thoughts. At least I will try."
"I wish the way to Norfield wasn't that long," Eileen muttered. "I can barely stand being with you when you are so...."
"Excited?" I suggested, still smiling.
"Exactly! And please, Evan try to control your thoughts in Amanda's pr
esence. She's not as patient as I am. And we don't want this Christmas to turn into another fight between you two."
"Well, I can't promise anything, Eileen. You made me go with you, remember? So whatever comes next will be your fault."
"Can I ask you guys what thoughts you are arguing about?" Christian asked.
"No!" Eileen and I replied in unison.
"Okay, but despite the fact that I can't read minds, I still can read auras. And Eileen's feelings. And whatever comes from both of you significantly complicates my driving."
"Just watch the road, Christian," I said, giving Eileen a meaningful glance. It was one of those moments when I realized that with all the bonds we shared, we could kiss our privacy good-bye.
Chapter 4
The moment our car stopped at the entrance to Christian's house, I regretted coming there. All I wanted was to run away unseen. Eileen would be upset of course, but I doubted I was ready to stand so many fairy lights, smiles, food and wishes.
"Just relax, Evan," Eileen said, watching my inner struggles. Every step to the front door felt like a shot straight to my heart. People were laughing inside the house and the sound of their laughter made me sick. I didn't belong there.
"Sure." I tried to smile, suppressing the impulse to escape. "Keep sneering, Dear. It surely stops me from killing you right away. What the hell, Eileen? You were supposed to be my friend! Kind and understanding. But you dragged my ass here and now you ask me to relax? And the only thing I need to call this night successful is a meeting with our beloved Amanda."
"Everything's gonna be okay, Evan. Don't worry," Christian said. "You know how much my family loves you. They will never make you feel unwelcome."
"Well, thank you, my friend! You always seem to say the right thing to lift my spirits." I rolled my eyes. "I'm pretty sure this time their attempts to cheer me up will end up with me locking myself in one of your rooms to sit out this damn Christmas there."
"I doubt Eileen and Amanda will let this happen."
"Ah, women! They are walking troubles for someone like me."
Christian laughed, opening the door. "You just don't realize how lucky we are to have them in our lives."
"Sure, sure," I muttered, ignoring Eileen's meaningful nodding.
***
Surprisingly enough, I liked that night. Eileen's and Amanda's presence didn't bother me. Rather on the contrary - their happiness was filling my heart, significantly improving my bad mood. Amanda looked very calm. Apparently, a few weeks spent at home helped her to get used to the idea of reading our minds.
Everything was fine. Even perfect. As if all of those present tried really hard not to mention our numerous problems so as not to ruin the celebration. We still had no idea how to find the old spell, hidden somewhere in Dever that the Dragons brotherhood needed so much to become immortal and almighty. That reminded me of my father being one of them too. It was really hard to accept the reality of his cruel nature and all those terrible things he was doing while heading the brotherhood.
There was one more thing I couldn’t stop thinking about. My brother’s involvement into our parents’ death. His words said to Tara a few weeks ago about the truth I didn’t know, were still ringing in my ears. I didn’t want to forget them, repeating every word again and again and hoping that it was just another lie, and neither he nor my father had anything to do with the Dragons and their crazy ideas of becoming almighty. And I badly wanted to be right….
Some time later I found myself standing in the middle of the room that Amelia had prepared for me. It was decorated in light-blue and gray colors. It reminded me of my room in Dever. My guess was that Christian’s parents wanted me to feel comfortable and that’s why this guest room was prepared especially for me. Everyone knew about the tragedy that happened to my parents and I was grateful for everything they had done to make this Christmas different from all those lonely holidays I used to spend in Dever.
Eileen was right. I had to move on without turning around all the time and thinking about my past. All I needed to do was to learn how to live thinking about something good, about my future.
I smiled sadly to myself. Coming to Norfield was definitely worth it. I needed to see all those smiling faces and hear happy laughter, coming from downstairs just to realize that life goes on, and there are so many things I miss separating myself from moments of family warmth.
Maybe that was Eileen’s plan. Despite the fact that she tried to be relaxed, I knew she was still watching me out of the corner of her eye, listening to my feelings and trying her best to save me from years of sadness that were consuming my soul.
I can’t but admit that her plan was good. I should probably say thanks one day.
I took my diary. It was time to get rid of it. But first I wanted to reread a few more memories. Most of them were very precious to me, and I knew they would stay in head forever, no matter how many times I burn the pages that reveal them.
Chapter 5
March 1st, 2005
The first day of spring, the beginning of Embry’s month. Every faculty of Dever has its month during which its students are competing to receive a degree of The Master of Talents. Masters are honored to show their individual performances at the annual Festival of Arts. Apart from all the above the first day of spring is associated with the Flowers’ festival and Spring ball.
I didn’t have the slightest desire to participate in any of those celebrations, but everything changed to moment I joined Tara and Kevin at breakfast.
“Morning,” my brother said, chewing his sandwich. “Have you already found a date for tonight?”
“Actually, I haven’t. Do you have anyone in mind?” I said, taking a seat next to him.
“I do. You can go with Tara.”
“What?” she and I asked in unison.
“My leg is still plastered after the unfortunate horse riding and I can’t accompany her myself. But I don’t want her to go with some stranger.” Kevin was too focused on his food to notice Tara’s and my frozen postures. “Don’t worry, Honey,” he added, patting his girlfriend’s hand, “Evan and I were raised by a very talented woman who taught us how to dance every known dance in the world. My brother waltzes as good as I do.”
Kevin was right. There was a time when Elizabeth Murray was torturing us by the long hours of dancing classes, saying that dancing skill was a key to every girl’s heart. That’s why now waltz, tango and foxtrot could be included into a list of our strongest points. And the thought of sharing one of those dances with Tara made my heart sing in anticipation of the upcoming night, and me, holding her in my embrace.
I looked at Tara and smiled slightly. This time I won’t let you run away.
As if feeling my wordless vow, Tara turned to Kevin and said, ”It’s not necessary. We can go to the ball next year.”
“No way!” he protested. “I will feel guilty for the rest of my life if you miss this ball. I know how long you’ve been looking forward to it.”
“Seriously, Tara what’s wrong with going to the ball with me?” I asked her, knowing that at that very moment she was mentally calling me every name in the book.
“Fine. I will go with Evan,” finally she said, meeting my joyful stare. Man, she was stunning in anger. “She you later,” she added, turning around and storming out of the dining room.
“She’s amazing,” Kevin said, smiling, with his eyes following Tara.
Yes, she is, I thought to myself and said aloud, ”I’ll take it for granted.”
Tara was an extraordinary young woman. Sometimes it seemed that she was making the whole world move in time with her. I didn’t recognize my own brother as if he were turning into a completely different person whenever she was around. He was more sensitive, kind and less egoistic. Tara held the key to his heart, melting its icy shell with her love and beauty.
No one had ever been able to get so deep under Kevin’s skin. But everything was different when it came to Tara. Kevin couldn’t think about anythi
ng else, drinking in her every word, her every breath and every move. And I was jealous watching them, because every time I saw Tara, I was feeling the same things as Kevin….
I was looking forward to every casual encounter, every glance and every touch. I was losing my mind trying to remember every moment we spent together. And despite the fact that she was still avoiding me, I could still feel the same excitement we both felt the day of our first meeting. She couldn’t hide it. And I couldn’t believe that Kevin didn’t see anything, as the vibrations of our auras were so intense, that sometimes I was afraid to move so as not to blow up everything around me. My guess was that Kevin was too blind to notice anything, because his love for Tara was the most powerful thing he has ever felt. And I understood him better than anyone else….
The rest of the day went faster than I expected. I was looking forward to the ball and I couldn’t make myself concentrate on more important things. I paid too dearly for my foolishness on the practical training of Managing elements. My group mate Tammy managed to knock me down a few times in a row without an effort. And every one of those times I landed on my back, completely forgetting about all the precautionary measures.
Professor Barkly groaned irritably, watching my pathetic attempts to block Tammy’s attacks, “For God’s sake, Mr. Murray, do you still want to go to the ball tonight? It looks like you’ve missed everything I’ve been trying to teach you during the last two months! Miss Vergaro, please try not to kill him. I want him to be able to leave this audience without anyone’s help!”
“I’m so sorry, Evan.” Tammy crouched next to me and helped me get up. “I thought you would dodge my blows!”
“Don’t worry, I’m fine.” I smiled, rubbing my aching ribs. “I’m out of speed today. Do you mind if we leave the part of kicking my ass for the next time?”
“Sure, no problem.” Tammy grinned, nodding. “But next time be ready to demonstrate your powers. I won’t take a dive and throw the fight.”