“You thought you were helping a friend. And you were. There’s no harm in that.”
“There could be.” If he knew how much she yearned to crawl in bed beside him, he’d be shocked. The knowledge shocked her. “You’d better go back to sleep. You need your rest. I should sleep, too.”
He shrugged. “If you insist, but I’d rather talk to you. I’ve hardly been able to speak with you since we arrived.”
“I know. Perhaps tomorrow. You had a hard day and tomorrow morning will come too early for you.”
He groaned and let his head fall back against the headboard. “These ranchers are tough. I may die trying to keep up.”
Backing to the doorway, she said, “You’ll be fine. I have a feeling you’re tough, too, in your own way.”
He smiled. “Thanks, I hope you’re right.”
She stopped in the doorway. “At least tomorrow is Saturday.”
When he raised his eyebrows in question, she said, “Everyone quits early on Saturdays so there’s time to go into town.” She hoped he’d choose to say at the ranch with her.
“Thank God. Maybe I can keep up with Storm for part of a day.”
“Good night.” She pulled the door closed behind her and hurried to her room.
***
Nate had already left with the other men when Sarah came into the dining room. She wondered if she would have been able to meet his gaze after what happened in his room last night. Sighing, she wished she’d had the opportunity to see him. He’d said he hadn’t had a chance to talk to her alone and that was true.
She chewed her lip and wondered at the effect he had on her. All her life she’d acted with propriety, especially since coming to Kincaid Springs. She wore a corset if she went to town, always appeared neat as a pin and in the proper dress for the occasion and time of day. On her trip to see about Mama, though, something changed.
Of late, two beings warred within her. The old Sarah, so careful to act properly at all times, offend no one, too shy to speak up for herself, did battle with an emerging and blossoming entity. This new-sprung Sarah wanted to protect her children, to make a home for them. Moreover, the just-out woman longed to expand her experiences.
Watching Mama die forced Sarah to evaluate her own life. Lily’s abandoning her might have added to this change. Certainly finding her children drove her to seek changes in her life, required a set of new situations.
And Nate. Handsome, strong, wonderful...dangerous Nate. What about him created this yearning, a desire to do outrageous things that involved much more than kissing? She’d have to watch herself, be far more circumspect.
This evening she’d ask him to walk with her down by the river. Surely that was proper, right here near home. They’d be alone and Nate could talk to her all he wanted. Would he kiss her again? She hoped so and planned to give him the opportunity.
After all, there was no harm in flirting or kissing in a genteel way, was there? Her conscience asked, even if the kisses set her on fire and made her feel all sorts of things she didn’t understand? No, she’d be proper, she simply wouldn’t think those things. She’d kiss him and they would talk, that’s all. That matter settled firmly in her mind, she told Fiona about Grandpa’s job offer.
Fiona shook her head. “Oh, now wouldn’t that be lovely? But, I couldn’t possibly take the job.”
“Why ever not?” Sarah gasped.
Fiona looked close to tears, and shook her head again. “It would never work.”
Frustration shot through Sarah. “Why? Tell me why?”
“Sure and I saw the big house you pointed out on our wagon ride from the train station. Big as a castle it was.” Fiona shook her head.
Sarah loved that house so much she found it impossible to keep the enthusiasm from her voice. “It’s really charming inside. Drake loves to tell how Grandpa ordered it from a catalog. The pieces were shipped all the way from Chicago. Then, Grandpa hired a decorator who brought things from all over the world.”
Sarah sighed. She always enjoyed staying in the lovely pink and white room reserved for her. Though she’d never let on to Pearl, she’d always wished she could live with Grandpa in town.
“What did I tell you?” Fiona asked.
Snapped from her reverie about Grandpa’s house, Sarah said, “I don’t understand. Isn’t this what you’d hoped for?”
“In all my born life I’ve never so much as set foot in such a fine house. God love you for trying, but I’d be in bits every minute, don’t you see? What would the likes of me be doing in a house like that? No, I thank you all the same, but I’ll not be taking the job.”
Sarah felt like screaming. “I don’t understand. Please explain to me why you don’t want the job.”
Fiona’s face showed surprise. “Not want it? Sure and I’d like it plenty. But, dearie, I would never be able to do a proper job of it.”
Fiona pulled a handkerchief from inside the cuff of her sleeve and dabbed at her eyes. “Imagine me telling other women what to do to make a fine house like that run proper. Why, they’d...they’d laugh at me.”
“Nonsense. Emily and Polly are both used to having someone tell them what’s expected. They need supervision.”
When the look on Fiona’s face showed no change, Sarah tried another tactic. “And I’m worried about Grandpa. He’s done so much for this county and here he is in his late years with his home in chaos. It’s affecting his health, poor man.”
She had Fiona’s interest now. Fiona asked, “Is he ill then?” She clucked her tongue. “And he looks such a fine strapping man.”
“Pearl has to keep him supplied in tonics. His diet needs to be carefully monitored, but there’s no one to check on it. My Aunt Lily was so particular about everything. With her gone, I worry so about what will become of him.” Sarah wondered if exaggeration counted as a lie. She hoped not.
“Well...I do know how to plan a man a good meal. I haven’t forgotten so much as that. And I know about cleaning. I kept a good house, that I’ll admit.”
Sarah sighed. Finally they were getting somewhere. “You know how to clean, you’re very organized, you’re neat...And, Fiona, you need this job.”
Fiona wiped her nose and smiled. “All right, dearie. Sure and I’ll give it me best try. May the Lord have Mercy on us.”
Sarah patted her arm. “You’ll do fine, Fiona. Now, are you ready to talk to Grandpa?”
Fiona exhaled a giant sigh. “‘Tis nervous as a cat I am, but we might as well talk to Himself and be done with it.”
***
That evening, Sarah and Nate walked slowly along the riverbank. She touched the branch of a willow heavy with buds, but no green showed. A few more warm spring-like days like this one and the trees would leaf out.
“You’re limp’s better. Are you getting used to riding again?”
Nate looked back where the house stood. “You may have to hitch up the wagon and bring it to get me back up that hill.”
She laughed. They passed the makeshift fort and waved at the youngsters. So far, the children all played well together. Pearl’s boys were younger than Joe and Luke, but several of the vaqueros’ children were near their ages.
“I’m surprised you didn’t go into town with Storm and some of the other men,” she said.
“Too early for my associates to be there. I’d rather relax here and talk to you.”
He took her hand in his. The sensation of his strong warm hand and the strips of cloth protecting it made her think of last night in his room. She wished she could have stayed there, could have explored the delights he might offer, the lessons he had to teach. What those delights might be, she could only guess from what she’d read and overheard of married women’s conversations.
What would it be like to lose herself in abandon to him? Would the tingles she experienced at his touch heighten? She gave herself a mental shake. Such fancies could only lead to bad results. She meant to act properly in the future and not lose his respect. Gently retrieving her
hand, she walked beside him on the worn pathway.
She ducked her head, but watched him through her lashes. Beside them the river glistened in the light of the setting sun. The same light caught in his hair and painted more gold into the browns.
“You folks sure have pretty sunsets out here,” he said. “Sunrises, too.”
“You should see it when there’s been a thunderstorm with some of the purple clouds still in the sky. That’s how my brother got his name, you know. His mother thought his eyes looked like the rolling purple clouds of a storm so she named him Eyes Like Storm Cloud. He shortened it to Storm Cloud.” She gave him a sidelong look and said, “Oh, dear, I seem to be babbling. Anyway, it really can be breathtaking.”
He stopped and gently pulled her to face him. “I doubt it could compare to the breathtaking sight I see now.”
Myriad sensations shot through her—pleasure, astonishment, wonder, sheer stark terror. What should she do? What should she say?
She stammered, “You...You’re being kind.”
Trees screened them from the house now. They were alone with only the birds and animals to keep them company.
“Far from it. Sarah, you’re one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen. But more than that, you’re intelligent, interesting, and, well, spunky.”
She let out an exasperated sigh. “Spunky? People keep telling me that. What does it mean?”
He laughed at her chagrin. “You aren’t afraid to stand up for what you believe. Look at the way you rescued the children.”
Her gaze met his. “I couldn’t have managed it without your help.” She wouldn’t have wanted to.
In spite of his bandages, he took both of her hands in his. “Yes, you could have. I know you would have saved them against any odds.”
“Would you like to rest a bit?” She gestured to the trunk of a giant cottonwood felled by a storm. Drake had stripped the limbs and hauled them away, but left the massive trunk as a sort of bench. This was her goal. Here they could sit side by side again and discuss anything they wished in private.
They sat and she smiled up at him. Oh, dear, what should she say? “Um, did I thank you for helping me?”
“Yes, several times. I can think of another way, though,” he said and pulled her near.
His gaze watched hers as he lowered his head. Shuttering her eyes, she leaned into him. She wanted this kiss, wanted to reclaim the sensations he aroused last night. Probing tongues danced together and fused in the fiery kiss.
Heat coiling in her core intensified and exploded through her. She forgot her earlier resolve to remain calm and proper. For the moment she couldn’t get enough of him. Her hands caressed his chest then slid around his neck.
He broke their kiss to swing his leg over and straddle the trunk, then snuggled her to him as he reclaimed her lips. She didn’t understand her need for more from him, but she ached for whatever he offered her. The power of her desire astonished her.
When he worked his fingers loose from the bandages and let them fondle her breast, she moaned with the pleasure of his touch. He gently rubbed his fingers across her nipple and she pulled him closer. Even through the fabric, his touch seared her skin.
She craved more, more of this wonderful rapture surging through her. When she felt his fingers at her bodice fastenings, she didn’t protest. Instead, she sank into his kisses and helped with the tiny buttons. He pushed the offending cloth down off her shoulders.
Whatever was to come, she wanted to experience all of this man and savor this moment. He broke the kiss to move across her face, down her neck, and across her shoulders showering kisses as he moved. She threw her head back and arched to allow him complete access to her exposed heart. So transported was she that his mouth on her bared breast came as a surprise. The exhilaration spiraled through her.
She gasped and cried, “Nate.” Not asking him to stop, only registering her pleasurable astonishment.
His hand touched her ankle, then moved slowly up in circular caresses. She knew she should pull away, should stop him immediately. Captured in his spell, she couldn’t force herself to halt his lovemaking. Like the rabbit caught by the wolf, she was powerless to escape—only she had no wish to flee.
He slipped his fingers through the slit in her drawers and touched her most private place. She would have protested, but his lips reclaimed hers and she was lost. His finger moved across her feminine nub and stars exploded in her brain.
When his finger slipped inside her, she melted. He moved his mouth back to her breast. The suckling of his mouth and tongue strokes against her nipple kept pace with the delving of his fingers inside her. She had an almost overwhelming urge to move her hips in time to his strokes, but feared she would fall from the tree trunk and end this magic.
His arousal pressed into her side. If she had bones in her body she would have touched him, explored him as he explored her. She thought nothing could ever be more wonderful, but a new thrumming built inside her. Growing, blossoming, wave after wave of ecstasy grew. My stars, she had no idea anything could feel this good. She lost control, felt her body leave in an ascent to paradise.
“Nate?” she panted.
When his gaze met hers, his eyes were dark with passion. “Give into it, sweetheart. Let yourself go.”
He sought her other breast. Only his arm bracing her kept her from dissolving across the tree trunk. With his fingers probing, he used a thumb to rake across her nub.
A flick of his tongue and he raised his head from her breast long enough to murmur, “That’s it, sweetheart. Let yourself flow with the feeling.”
The sensations increased until she neither heard nor saw her surroundings. She burst with pleasure and sank against him.
After a few gasping breaths, she opened her eyes. “Nate, what happened? I never dreamed, I mean—“
He held her against him and nuzzled her neck. “Pretty powerful, isn’t it? Especially the first time.”
She raised her head to look into his eyes. “You mean you can make me feel like that again?”
He chuckled and kissed the corner of her mouth. “Anytime you’ll let me. There are other ways to give pleasure. It only gets better.”
Wonderful news, but what enjoyment had he received? “And what makes you feel that way?”
He took her hand and pressed on his arousal through his clothes. “I can show you.”
She moved her trembling fingers to fumble with the buttons of his trousers, eager to satisfy her curiosity as well as let him share her delight. He exhaled a sharp breath when she touched him. Her fingers tested the sensation of soft skin on his hard shaft.
Pearl had explained the ways of men and women long ago, and Sarah had seen statues of naked men pictured in books. Nothing prepared her for the transformation of the manhood part. She wondered how on earth it ever fit inside a woman’s small place. As she pondered this, she caressed up and down his sex. He moaned, his eyes closed.
His arms braced behind him on the tree trunk and he threw his head back. He appeared lost to anything but her touch, and she took pleasure in this new power she had over him. She gripped his shaft gently with one hand. The fingers of her other hand probed the tip of his manhood. A bead of moisture appeared and she massaged it around the tip. He moaned and she thought he might fall off the tree trunk.
No one had told her she possessed this ability to reduce a strong man to a moaning slave. The ability to induce such overwhelming emotion sent her spirits soaring. She wanted to laugh with delight. Had she looked this oblivious to the world when he had touched her?
Suddenly she became aware of a familiar noise and paused to listen. The jingles and creaks of a rig caught her ear, wheels crunching on the pebble strewn path.
“Someone’s coming,” she said.
She leaped up and straightened her skirt. My stars, she looked a sight. Quickly, she buttoned her bodice and smoothed her hair. Her heart still beat furiously and her stomach jiggled inside her. She shook her skirts, hoping the w
rinkles remaining didn’t give away her recent conduct.
He sat up and stared at her through dilated eyes that seemed unable to focus. In fact, he looked dazed, as if he hadn’t heard her or couldn’t register her words.
She pulled at his arm. “Nate, someone’s coming along the trail. Straighten your clothes.”
He shook his head and stood, tucking in his shirt and buttoning his trousers with trembling fingers. She stood beside him and took his arm. They strolled toward the oncoming buggy. She glanced down at her dress and smoothed out a telltale wrinkle.
The folly of what she’d just done struck her. What on earth possessed her to behave like a...a harlot? Yet, how could she regret the sensations she’d just experienced? She looked up at Nate. His composed features surprised her and his eyes wore that shuttered look he so often displayed. What did he think of her now? She wished she knew but she hardly knew what she thought of herself. They walked slowly while her mind whirled with conflicting sentiments. The rig approached rapidly with the horse at a trot.
“There you are, Sarah,” Peter Dorfmeyer said as he pulled beside them. “Your absence from the house surprised me. Surely you knew I’d come to call this evening?”
“No, Peter. How could I know that?” She turned to Nate. “Nate, this is Peter Dorfmeyer, the banker from town. Peter, Nate Barton is here on business and staying at the ranch for a few weeks.”
The two men eyed each other with hostility. Neither acknowledged the other with a greeting.
Peter looked at Sarah and said, “I’d been coming to call each Saturday for two months before your trip. It only stands to reason I’d resume my visits once you returned.” He glared at Nate and huffed an exaggerated sigh. “Well, you both might as well get in and I’ll take you back to the house.”
As Nate helped Sarah into the buggy, she murmured, “At least now you don’t have to walk up that hill.”
Chapter Ten
At the house, Nate helped Sarah from the buggy. He held her waist and gazed into her eyes. She saw the light of amusement glistening in his eyes' wolfish depths and they shared a smile before he released her. Peter fumed his way around the buggy to escort her into the house. From her point of view, the way to handle the situation was to walk ahead of the two men.
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