He did have to admit, though, that he wasn’t sure about her ideas about the children. On the surface it sounded good, and what she wanted to do with the children seemed reasonable, because he was all for these kids taking responsibility for various aspects of their health, even at their young ages. Keera seemed to have an agenda, though. She’d alluded to a rough childhood and needing her independence to get through it.
Still, there was something bigger. Something deeper. Maybe something to prove? And that’s what worried him a little because the only agenda here was giving these kids everything they needed to be a kid in recovery. Simple plan with a single purpose.
He wasn’t going to stop her, though, because he did see the value in it. And maybe when he got to know her better, he’d be a little more trusting. Provided he got to know her better. Which he hoped he would.
“Well, Dr. Reid, for a pediatrician you’re a pretty darned good cook. My full stomach thanks you for the wonderful breakfast, or lunch, or whatever it was.”
“My culinary skills thank you for the compliment. And just so you’ll know, I can make a pretty good grilled cheese sandwich, if you’re hungry later on.”
“Good to know, just in case. Anyway, let me go sit with Megan for another ten minutes, then if you could ask Sally to come round?”
He nodded on his way out the door, stopping first at the sink to scrub his hands.
“And, Reid, the class is the right thing. I’m glad you’re going to let me try it. I know you’re worried, but I really believe these kids should take part in their care, and I want to get started because there’s so much to teach them and I’ve only got a few days.”
“I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was concerned, because I am. Yes, it’s important to empower them, but it could also be said that because their lives are so overwhelmed with their conditions they don’t need to do anything more than they already do. You know, give them time to be children.”
“How about giving them time to be responsible children? Because they do have to go about their lives differently, and you can’t deny that. That’s not robbing them of their childhood, though. It’s only adding another layer to it.”
“You don’t ever give in, do you?”
She smiled. “Not unless I’m backed into a corner.”
“No corner here. Although I’m going to warn you that for a woman who doesn’t like kids, you’re waging a mighty tough battle on behalf of these kids. Could it be the facade is cracking a little?”
“I don’t have to like kids to want to do the right thing by them.”
“You’re right, you don’t. But battles are waged because of passions, and you’re waging a battle for them, Keera. Seems like someone’s trying to fool someone, doesn’t it?” He gave her a wink then grabbed a paper towel to dry his hands. “Now, let me go find Sally.”
* * *
“Is her little girl sick like Emmie used to be?” Allie asked. She was sitting on the step outside when Reid left the infirmary.
“Aren’t you supposed to be in arts and crafts?”
Allie rolled big, sad eyes up at him. A gesture that always melted him right down to nothing. Even at five, she knew that. “I missed you.”
“And I missed you too, Miss Allejandra Lourdes Reid. But you need to go back to arts and crafts.” He scooped the child up into his arms and walked across the compound with her, heading to the building where Allie should be occupied with finger-painting and sculpting with modeling clay, while the older children were involved in basic agility exercises on the obstacle course. “And, no, Dr. Murphy’s little girl isn’t sick the way Emmie was. Do you remember what I told you about something being contagious? How when some people get sick, other people can get sick from being too close to them? What Emmie had wouldn’t make anybody else sick, but what Megan has can make people get sick if they get too close to her, which is why you can’t go inside the infirmary. I don’t want you getting sick.”
“Will you get sick, Daddy?”
“No.” And this was where he didn’t want to launch into the explanation of vaccinations and how some illnesses, like measles, you’d only catch once. Which he’d had. “Doctors have special ways to protect themselves.”
“Good,” she said earnestly. “Because I don’t know how to take care of you yet.”
“Yes, you do,” he whispered, as he headed down the back steps and handed the child over to Ciera, the arts and crafts volunteer. Hated like hell watching Ciera take Allie away.
Turning away to head off to agility training, he saw Keera watching him from the infirmary window, and wondered why someone like her didn’t like children. What had she missed out on in her life that had scared her off so badly from what he believed to be one of the fundamental joys of life?
“You just don’t know you like them,” he said to himself. “But you will. Another few days here, and you will.”
CHAPTER FOUR
“HOW DID IT GO?” Reid asked, catching up to Keera, who was crossing the compound, her arms loaded with supplies, on her way back to the infirmary.
“Pretty good. We learned all about thermometers, what a body’s temperature indicates, and how to take and read temperatures. I had them taking each other’s temps, and I think there may be a few budding doctors in the group. Including Emmie. She’s quite a little leader.”
“As in bossy?” he asked.
“As in taking charge and being helpful. She’s a sweet little girl, Reid. You’re doing a good job with her. Oh, and she and Allie and I have a date for lunch in a little while. They want to show me something. Sally said she’d sit with Megan, so I hope that’s OK? Because I asked the cook to pack us a little picnic. You’re invited too. Something about the wading place.”
He smiled. “The water’s nice there. Not very deep. And so clear you can see the bottom.”
“Well, apparently I need to go wading, and as I’ve never been, I’ve got able volunteers who want to teach me. All with your permission, of course.”
“Something about being around a strong woman seems to be bringing out the best in my girls.”
“I’m not overstepping the mark, am I?”
He shook his head. “They asked me first. I said yes.”
“And you’re coming?”
“I’ll try. I need to do a physical on one of the kids, but that shouldn’t take too long.”
“Something wrong?” she asked.
He shook his head. “Physician request. It happens all the time.”
“Good, then I’ll see you at the wading place. But be warned, we might be talking girl things most of the time.”
“See, that’s the part of single parenting that’s tough. They need a woman’s touch, and it’s just not there. I don’t have a sister near by, and my mother and dad are in South America right now, running a medical clinic in Ecuador. No aunts or female cousins either.”
“No girlfriend?”
“Had a fiancée for a while, but she didn’t like the idea that I adopted a sick child. She thought it would take too much time away from her. And she was correct about that. It did. So she was right to dump me. Haven’t really had time for a social life since then.”
“Which leaves two little girls without a female influence in their lives.”
“Right. It’s amazing what you can pick up in the parenting magazines, though,” he said, grinning. “I’ve got a whole stack of them, if you’d ever care to...”
She shook her head. “I was talking to social services a while ago, and they’re going to place Megan with a nice foster-family as soon as she’s medically able. And don’t even begin to think I can be as generous as you and take her in, because I can’t.
“She’s the...well, she’s not the reason my marriage ended, but she was one of the factors. My husband’s secret baby. So while I know i
t’s not her fault what her daddy did, and I totally understand that she’s the only true innocent in a very ugly situation, I can’t spend the rest of my life looking at her, knowing that...”
“That you failed?”
“Yes, I failed. But that’s not even it. I didn’t even know how to try. And Megan’s that reminder.”
“So you’ll let her go to some stranger because of something you perceive as a lack in yourself.”
“Fostering that little girl has never been an option for me. My lifestyle won’t allow it.”
“Yet you’ll go on a lunch date with my little girls. That seems to conflict with your no-kids-allowed rule.”
Stepping into the infirmary, Keera dropped her armload of supplies on the nearest desk, then spun to face Reid. “You did a good thing adopting your girls. You’re a good man. A generous man. A very caring man. And that’s all you.
“But I don’t want the responsibility, OK? I feel sorry for Megan. My heart is breaking for her and I want to make sure she gets into a good situation. But that’s not me. I work. I sleep. Then I work some more. Nothing there’s going to change because I don’t want it to change.
“So don’t think that because I’ve agreed to give you one week of service here, and go on a picnic with your girls, that I’m going to come out of it with some big change of heart. My life is fine the way it is. It’s not empty. I’m happy.”
“And pretty damn defensive about it, too,” he added.
“And pretty damn honest about it, Reid. I know what I can and can’t have, and what you have...” She shook her head. “I can’t have that.”
“But can you have dinner? Tonight, after the kiddies are asleep? I’ve got enough people on call to cover us, I’m sure Sally will be fine spending an extra couple of hours looking after Megan, and there’s an amazingly elegant little café about ten miles down the road. It sits on top of a mountain, and they say the sunset is breathtaking.”
“In scrubs?” she asked. “Because that’s all I have to wear.”
“There’s a little mercantile on the way. We could stop and do some shopping. Maybe for Megan as well, because she’ll be up and out of bed by tomorrow or the day after.”
An evening out with a man sounded surprisingly good. So did shopping for Megan. And while she and Reid didn’t see eye to eye on a lot of things, she really liked him. Was curious to see him away from his element. “This isn’t you asking me out on a date so you can get some personal satisfaction that you broke down my code a little, is it?”
He laughed. “Are you always so ungracious about what’s just a simple gesture of friendship?”
“Not ungracious.” She tilted her head up to look him straight in the eyes. “Just cautious.”
“I don’t want anything from you, Keera, except the days you promised me. Because, believe it or not, I’m as cautious as you are. Maybe even more, since I’ve got my daughters to consider.”
“Then I suppose it’s a date.” She smiled. “Cautiously speaking.”
* * *
“Eat one more bite,” Keera encouraged Megan. Who would have guessed one bowl of soup could have taken so long? But Megan was being stubborn, and Sally was standing ready to swoop in and take over as soon as Keera admitted defeat.
“Maybe she’s not hungry,” the older woman said. “It doesn’t always do to force children to eat if they don’t want to.”
“She’s going to get too weak,” Keera protested. “And it’s just soup.” She felt totally defeated, failing at such a simple task.
“But does she like the soup?” Sally asked.
It had never occurred to her that Megan would have food preferences. Which just went to prove, even more, that she wasn’t the one to take care of this child. “Do you like the soup?” she asked Megan.
Megan shook her head, indicating an adamant no.
“Then is there anything you would like to eat?”
“Strawberries,” she said. “Want strawberries.”
“Which would be toast with strawberry jam.” She looked at Sally. “It’s what she had for breakfast.”
“And it’s what she’ll have for lunch. Let me run over to the kitchen, and I’ll fix some.”
“Is that all you want?” Keera asked Megan.
This time Megan nodded in the affirmative.
“They do have their opinions, even at that age,” Reid said on his way in, as Sally flew out the door. He pulled out a stethoscope and listened to Megan’s chest. “Bet you like peanut butter, too, don’t you?” he asked the child, once he pulled the earpieces from his ears.
“Yes,” she said. “And bananas.”
“Then we’ll see if we can find you some peanut butter and bananas for dinner. OK?”
Megan nodded.
“See, it comes naturally to you,” Keera said. “And I don’t have a clue.”
“Well, I have an advantage. Not only am I a father, I work with children every day of my life. Before I went to med school I didn’t have a clue, but I’ve learned. And that’s what it’s about, Keera. Learning. Trial and error, in my opinion, is the best way to figure it out. Oh, and she’s not as congested as she was last night. I think the medicine is working. And as she’s eating, it’s time to yank the IV. You want me to get rid of that nasty old tube in your arm, Megan?”
“It itches,” she said, nodding.
“Well, we don’t want you itching.”
Keera stood back and watched the natural interplay between Reid and Megan, and admired the way he was so at ease with the child. It was like he knew exactly what she wanted. In a way, she envied that as it was a rapport she didn’t have with her own patients. If ever there was someone who’d been put on this earth to work with children...
“Try,” he prompted Keera.
“Try what?”
“To find your way in. One little thing—that’s all it will take.”
“Except I don’t have a clue what that one little thing is.”
“There’s no specific one little thing. Like I said, trial and error. Think about something children love. Something you loved when you were a child.”
She thought for a moment then smiled. “Megan, after you eat your toast and strawberries, would you like...” she glanced over at Reid, then back at Megan “...ice cream?”
Megan’s eyes lit up. “Yes,” she squealed.
“Then ice cream it is,” Keera confirmed, feeling the same sense of accomplishment she usually felt after a long, grueling surgery.
“And you think you don’t have a way with kids,” Reid said. “One bowl of ice cream is going to go a lot further than you thought. Just wait and see.”
“One bowl of ice cream doesn’t make me parenting material. And even with that, you had to prompt me.”
He laughed. “When Emmie was younger, and on chemo, getting her to eat was maybe the hardest thing I had to do, other than standing around and feeling so helpless. Bribes were good, though. What worked as often as not was a good honest talk with her about the importance of taking a bite or two. Kids her age...even kids Megan’s age...do understand, and sometimes we forget that because we’re so busy trying to convince them in a child’s logic. But they live in an adult world as well, and you have to keep that in mind.”
The adult world she’d known as a child had been harsh, cruel. Unfair. “I think it’s better to let them live in their childhood world as long as they can, because when the adult world takes over...” She shrugged, then turned to Megan. “I’m going to get your ice cream now. Vanilla or chocolate?”
“’Nilla,” she said, then smiled for the first time since Keera had known her.
Beautiful little girl, beautiful smile. She did look like her daddy, though. Especially the depth she saw in Megan’s eyes. Kevin had always had that depth, had always seen thing
s so deeply. She thought about their marriage as she dashed to the kitchen to scoop up the ice cream. It had started so well, all the regular hopes and dreams and plans. Then had ended so badly she’d blotted out most of everything past the midway point.
How did something like that happen to two people? It scared her because while on one level she understood how they’d grown apart, on a much deeper level she didn’t understand it at all. Which meant she was doomed to repeat her mistakes—the reason why she wasn’t going to do that ever again.
“Where’d you go?” Reid asked her, when she returned with the ice cream, only to find Megan munching away quite happily on a piece of toast.
“What do you mean? I’m right here.”
“I don’t mean in the literal sense,” he said. “There was this look in your eyes when you came back in.”
“Ex-husband stuff. Megan looks like him.”
“And that bothers you?”
“Not really. But I was wondering how a marriage could go as wrong as ours did. There was a time when we were good, but it didn’t last very long. And from the point we started losing, there was no way to get any of it back.”
“But did you try?”
“Honestly, I don’t know. Wouldn’t have mattered, because he was already so invested in his other life.”
“But you still loved him?”
“I’d like to say yes, or even no. But I don’t know if I ever did, at least in the way you’re supposed to when you commit your life to someone.” She glanced down at the ice cream, and smiled. “But now I have his little girl, and I’m sure she’d prefer her ice cream not melted. So...” She stepped around Reid but stopped. “I’m not an indecisive person, Reid. Most of the time I’m probably more forceful than most people you know. Which is what made the end of my marriage so bitter, because it turned out that’s the trait he hated most in me.”
A Child to Heal Their Hearts Page 6