by Emma Dean
Her words hurt more than she thought they would. She pressed a hand to her chest to try and ease the ache. The truth had been a thorn in her side for cycles, but here was a chance Varan may actually be interested in her and she had to throw it away. She had to tell him in no uncertain terms she could never be his. “I don’t know what you know about the race of courtesans, but it is never a simple matter of what I want.”
Nadyah tucked her shreve in her pocket and reached for her cloak. Her heart hurt and she tried to hide it as she concentrated on clasping the cloak around her shoulders. The material fluttered and then settled. She braved a look up. His face was blank and Varan was as still as the Gentle God himself.
“What would you say if I told you of my feelings?” he asked quietly.
Her heart leapt and then she felt sick. If he told her he loved her she might risk it. Nadyah would risk the chance of losing her status.
A courtesan was not submissive or dominant, but fluid and flexible to balance those around them. It was rare, but part of their genetic programming altered this flexibility when they found their mate. It was so rare most had forgotten about it, but courtesans could never afford to. Her feelings for Varan and her desire were strong enough to warn her away from him. If Varan were her true mate the genes would be triggered when he filled her with his seed. She would settle on submissive or dominant, whichever her mate required of her and the fluid dance from one end of the spectrum to the other would end abruptly.
Nadyah still owed Jael five more cycles on her contract. She loved her job, both of them, and despite the fact she may lose her true mate to some other female, Nadyah wasn’t ready to throw away everything she had worked so hard for to become mated to Varan, but the bond was one-sided.
He could choose not to marry her and then where would she be?
She shook her head and blinked against the tears filling her eyes. “I don’t know how that would make a difference, Varan. I am and always will be a courtesan. How I personally feel will never matter.”
Nadyah swallowed the lies and left his office as quickly as she could before she gave in to her traitorous heart and damned them all.
Nadyah
House of Kismet
Planet Draga Terra
The sting of the slap whipped Nadyah’s head to the side and it hurt, but not as much as her pride. Her knees dug into the stone floor under the thin carpet. She had known better and still she had given in to her personal desires.
Varan would be the death of her.
“How dare you?” Jael didn’t have to yell. Her calm, icy words cut deeper than hot anger would. “I am disappointed in you Nadyah d’Lara. You were my best pupil and now you shame me?”
She winced as Mistress Jael paced her office with barely restrained fury. “You should have consulted me before entrusting the thief. If anything happens as a result of your foolishness you know what must be done.”
Nadyah trembled but she kept her palms flat on her thighs and her head bowed in complete submission to her superior. She deserved everything Jael gave her and more. She was lucky her Mistress hadn’t opted to use the whip for her punishment.
Why did she have to love him?
Jael stopped before Nadyah and yanked her head back by her hair, exposing the delicate skin of her throat. “What must be done, Nadyah d’Lara?” the Spider hissed.
Nadyah kept her eyes closed to ensure she didn’t challenge her Mistress. “My life will be taken from me one piece at a time,” she whispered.
Every courtesan/spy knew the penalty for treason. Even a mistake that resulted in treason had the same sentence.
“My life will be removed from me starting with my fingers and toes, and ending with my organs until the last drop of blood quenches the thirst for vengeance.” Her stomach roiled and Nadyah nearly lost her last meal. “Justice will be done.”
Jael released her hair and smoothed back the blonde curls. “Yes, and it will all end when you watch as I remove your still beating heart from your body.” Her nails raked against Nadyah’s face and then she whipped around to prowl towards her desk.
Finally Nadyah allowed herself to take a breath and let her head fall, chin to her chest. Blood dripped onto the red carpet from the deep lines on her cheek. The carpet was a dark color for a reason.
Jael flicked the blood and pieces of skin from her nails, and then tapped Nadyah’s shreve. “You are lucky, dear one. The thief gave you excellent and accurate intel.” There was a pause and Nadyah knew her Mistress studied the monsters Varan had spoken about.
The grainy vids were enough to give Nadyah nightmares for the rest of her life. They were some kind of demon monster. A smooth oblong head with no eyes, but two rows of razor sharp teeth below small slits for nostrils. The limbs were what made her the most uneasy. The limbs were too long for their bodies and angular. It moved like a spider would but with a ferocity and speed that devoured anything in its path.
She had wasted precious moments retching behind a building after watching a vid depicting the monsters shredding through people on a transport ship. Their long, black tongues licked and chewed and…she forced her mind to go blank. Nadyah couldn’t afford to be sick again and certainly not in front of her mistress.
“The lost prince is safe in the palace?” Jael asked as she transferred all of Nadyah’s gathered information.
She took a moment to carefully consider her words before answering. “For the time being.”
The Spider turned back to her and leaned against her desk. Her flowing gown twisted about her legs in a pleasing way and Jael knew it. Every move she made was calculated. “Ensure his safety,” Jael ordered. “I don’t care what you have to do, but there needs to be a legitimate heir to Khara Prime and it cannot be the usurper. The Neprijat will take and then defile. Prince Nash is the only answer.”
Nadyah desperately wanted to ask if Jael thought Nash had murdered his own family in accordance with the false king. She ground her teeth and kept her mouth shut. If Jael thought he should be king then she thought he was innocent. To question that innocence would earn her more than lines on her face.
The deep scratches stung, but they would heal in a few hours. Nadyah would have to avoid her princess until then. The Spider floated towards her and didn’t stop until Nadyah’s eyes were on her embroidered slippers. The glittering skirt of her gown swished and Nadyah did not dare look up.
Jael’s smooth and delicate hand caressed the cheek still dripping blood and Nadyah hid her flinch. “Your report states that Princess Adelina spoke up for the lost prince. I want you to cultivate their relationship. Support her and teach her the ways of the Corinthians as well. You never know, the skills might be of use to the young princess.”
Nadyah felt bile rise to burn her tongue. She hated the way Jael thought she could command lives as if they meant nothing to the ones they belonged to. The courtesan kept her mouth shut and waited for her orders. After all, they both served and protected the Crown and the royal family.
“Acknowledge you understand what I’ve said.” Jael’s fingers tilted Nadyah’s chin up until she was forced to look into her mistress’s eyes. “Vow to me you will remain loyal and dedicated.”
“I, Nadyah d’Lara, swear fealty to Jael d’Melarque. I vow to remain loyal to the house of Draga and all that entails. My dedication will never waver. Only the way of the Goddess matters.”
The Goddess of love and wisdom—there were two sides to that goddess. She had one side of light and love. The dark side did whatever was required to achieve the end result. She reflected the true heart of a female; dual personalities. They were all capable of darkness and light, and occasionally a situation required the two separate sides of a woman to act as one. Wisdom could be attained through the darkness or through love, the goddess didn’t particularly care how and neither did Jael.
She only wished she knew why the goddess would bless a courtesan with love for a man that contradicted her vows. There had to be a reason, she just didn’t kno
w what it was yet.
Nadyah remained still as Jael sealed her vow with a kiss. The taste of the Spider lingered and Nadyah licked her lips. The dark red wine remained and Nadyah’s belly fluttered.
The ache Varan left was tempered with the pain Jael had inflicted and the fear of what would happen to her if she failed her mistress. Nadyah only hoped the threat of her execution would help her stay away from the Prince of Thieves the next time she saw him. And Nadyah knew there would be a next time. The goddess enjoyed torturing her too much to allow anything less.
Nadyah watched Jael return to the information on her shreve. She had wanted to ask about Adelina’s strange reactions, but her Mistress was too keen on the possible match between Adelina and Nash for Nadyah’s comfort. Mistress Jael didn’t seem to care the union could put her princess in danger and Nadyah would never forgive herself if Jael wanted to use that information against Adelina.
No, she would keep her suspicions to herself. Nadyah and Adelina would find the answers they needed without the help of the Spider. Until then she would say nothing, and only with the permission of her princess.
Nadyah sighed internally as her mistress waved her hand, dismissing her. She would have to tell Princess Adelina about the secret work she did for Jael.
It was not a conversation she looked forward to.
Chapter Nine
Adelina
Draga Royal Palace
Planet Draga Terra
Adelina watched Giselle and Nash leave the breakfast table. No one paid her any mind as she followed after them. Thankfully breakfast was a relaxed affair that was more of a banquet than a proper sit down. Adelina nodded to Raena who was in the middle of a conversation with their mother.
Per her original schedule she should be assisting the staff in preparations for her coming-of-age party, but Giselle would take them her notes and plans. The housekeeper was more than capable. As she left the royal dining room Adelina passed Alpha. He was a silent shadow next to her.
Giselle had told her to meet in the library where she would pass the prince off to Adelina for the tour of the palace. Giselle had training to attend and she had to stay on top of it if she wanted to pass the physical test for entry to the Army. Their parents and Raena disapproved, but Giselle would wear them down eventually and when it finally happened she would be prepared.
As they walked through the halls, Adelina glanced over at Alpha. “Did you receive my cast?” she asked.
Alpha nodded. “I did, Princess. I still do not approve.”
She refrained from sighing. Adelina hadn’t expected Alpha to be such a pain about this. It had been six months and they both had moved on from their intense but short romance. He was still one of her best friends, but Alpha was overbearing. Ever since the bombs he’d been relentless about her safety.
“You do not have to approve to obey my request,” she said as gently as she could manage. By the way he stiffened it was clear she’d angered him. This was where they still had to improve. She commanded his life by her rank if not by her will and Adelina hardly ever used that power. But on occasion she was forced to. “I am more than capable of keeping myself safe, I do not need you to escort us both.” Adelina stopped outside the library doors and turned to face her long-time friend.
Crossing his arms, he frowned down at her. “This prince is only here out of courtesy and the wish of the King. His request for sanctuary will not be granted and your life is too valuable. Leaving you with him alone is a risk I will not take.”
How could she convince him to leave? Nash would not open up to her if Alpha trailed behind him with the glare he had on his face. She waved her hand over the pad and the doors opened, giving her time to think. “William’s eyes will be on us and I trust him,” she said quietly as they made their way to the domed center, sunlight streamed through the stained glass.
Alpha made a rude noise of disagreement. “Well I do not trust that Kharan cula-boy. For all we know he could be in league with the Neprijat.”
It took every ounce of Adelina’s control not to whip around and slap Alpha across the face as hard as she could. “Hold your tongue, or I will hold it for you,” she hissed. His look of surprise and shock snapped her out of her anger. Where the fierce protectiveness she felt came from was a mystery to her.
“Lina – I’m—I’m sorry. I only worry,” Alpha stuttered.
Guilt crashed over her and with a sigh she opened her mouth to apologize. Someone cleared their throat behind her and Adelina turned. Her face flushed with embarrassment and she dropped her eyes to the floor as Giselle studied her with amusement.
She could feel Prince Nash’s gaze on her and she looked up, and up until she finally met Prince Nash’s gorgeous green and yellow eyes. The sparkles of red had her staring for far too long before she realized her mistake, as the submissive she should have dropped her gaze long ago. The way he studied her – his eyes were sharp and intelligent. They did not allow her thoughts to reach her tongue so she could form words.
Goddess, he looked haunted.
He simply watched her without saying a word and she had no idea what went through his head. Adelina wished she could help him, but there was nothing she could do to ease his pain. It marked his face and she could see it in the way he held himself, so stiff and formal. Even the muscles in his jaw were tight.
The silence stretched.
“Adelina, Prince Nash is ready for his tour.” Giselle bowed and left her alone with both males.
Adelina curtseyed appropriately, remembering he was now the crown prince and higher than her in rank. Alpha bowed, and Nash returned the niceties though he seemed annoyed by them. His silence made her anxious. Hopefully she wouldn’t be this tense once the tour started.
She turned to Alpha and hoped he wouldn’t make this difficult. “Thank you for escorting me here,” she said as politely as she could, knowing Nash had probably overheard their furiously whispered conversation. “I will be fine from here on with the Prince as my escort.” William’s assignment also ensured the guards would watch them despite the appearance of privacy.
Alpha’s face was blank, and if she didn’t know him so well she would never have known the look was a mask for his anger. The lines around his eyes and the clenched jaw told her exactly what he thought of her subtle orders. He couldn’t outright deny her with others present without breaking protocol and suffering punishment. He bowed first to her and then to Nash before exiting the library.
She watched Alpha go with mixed feelings. Adelina didn’t like the friction between them. When she turned back to Nash she found him studying her closer than she would have liked.
What should she say? Adelina clasped her hands in front of her and stared into his gorgeous eyes as she thought. She decided she could at least let him know he was not completely alone in the palace. Quickly she wrapped her arms around his waist before she could second guess herself and gave him a hug, a small bit of comfort. She squeezed tight, her head resting on his chest – he was so tall – and then she released him before he could react; before anyone saw her transgression.
Adelina bowed her head slightly, noting the look of shock on his face. “My condolences Prince Nash, I remember your family with fondness from the few visits we’ve had over the cycles. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to make you more comfortable here.” She straightened gracefully. When she met his eyes again there was a shimmer she pretended not to see.
Still the lost prince said nothing. Adelina felt drawn to him. As if he was a planet and she the moon. The heat from his body settled in her stomach and she felt nervous. Flustered and embarrassed, Adelina turned to leave the library and lead him through the palace but the prince grasped her small hand in his large one. She turned back in surprise.
“I appreciate your kindness more than you know,” Prince Nash finally said. A dip of his head in deference to their rank and then he walked casually to the large doors of the library.
She watched his strong back bef
ore remembering she was supposed to follow him. “This is the largest library in the Draga galaxy,” she said softly, trying not to draw the ire of the head librarian, wherever he was.
Prince Nash was silent next to Adelina as they walked. She glanced sidelong at Nash and wondered if he even cared about the tour of the palace. He seemed preoccupied, lost in his own thoughts and she couldn’t blame him.
Despite the heavy silence she showed him the rest of the third level, then the offices, and the art gallery. They went down and saw the separate ballroom, the state rooms, the kitchens, and she even took him to the underground labs.
Most of the palace was busy in preparation for her coming-of-age party and she felt slightly guilty she wasn’t helping more. She sighed. Escorting the lost prince was more difficult than she had anticipated.
Adelina took him up the lift once again to the fifth level and one of her favorite places. She ignored the offices and took him straight outside. The wraparound balcony on the fifth level gave magnificent views from every angle one could possibly wish to see.
“The palace grounds cover half of the planet,” Adelina went on, gesturing to where the fields began. "The Obsidian Mountains--or Notte Ossidiana--protects the backside of the palace. Our forest is heavy with animals and the hunting games might be of interest to you over the next few weeks.” She trailed off when he didn’t even look up as they passed the gloriously dark mountains.
Perhaps if she could get him to open up to her they could find an activity he might like. “Is there anything else you would like to see?” she asked him, stopping in front of her favorite mountain peak. Adelina placed both hands on the balcony and leaned forward, breathing in the cooler air.
Nash dutifully stood next to her, staring, but not really seeing the mountain. “No, Princess. I appreciate it but I remember my way around from the last time my family and I visited the Draga Palace.” His soft words hurt her heart. It wasn’t long ago Nash and his brothers and sisters roamed the palace with them, playing games and enjoying each other’s company.