The gentleman is learnèd, and a most rare124 speaker,
To nature none more bound125: his training such
That he may furnish and instruct great teachers,
And never seek for aid out of127 himself: yet see,
When these so noble benefits shall prove
Not well disposed129, the mind growing once corrupt,
They turn to vicious130 forms, ten times more ugly
Than ever they were fair. This man so complete131,
Who was enrolled ’mongst wonders — and when we,
Almost with ravished133 listening, could not find
His hour of speech a minute — he, my lady,
Hath into monstrous habits135 put the graces
That once were his, and is become as black
As if besmeared in hell. Sit by us: you shall hear —
This was his gentleman in trust138 — of him
To Wolsey
Things to strike honour sad.— Bid him recount
The fore-recited practices140, whereof
We cannot feel too little, hear too much141.
To the Surveyor
CARDINAL WOLSEY Stand forth, and with bold spirit relate what you
Most like a careful subject have collected143
Out of the Duke of Buckingham.
KING HENRY VIII Speak freely.
SURVEYOR First, it was usual with him — every day
It would infect his speech — that if the king
Should without issue die, he’ll carry148 it so
To make the sceptre149 his. These very words
I’ve heard him utter to his son-in-law,
Lord Aberga’nny, to whom by oath he menaced151
Revenge upon the cardinal.
CARDINAL WOLSEY Please your highness note
His dangerous conception154 in this point,
Not friended by his wish to your high person155:
His will is most malignant, and it stretches
Beyond you to your friends157.
QUEEN KATHERINE My learnèd lord cardinal,
Deliver159 all with charity.
To the Surveyor
KING HENRY VIII Speak on:
How grounded he his title to the crown161
Upon our fail? To this point162 hast thou heard him
At any time speak aught?
SURVEYOR He was brought to this
By a vain prophecy of Nicholas Hopkins.
KING HENRY VIII What was that Hopkins?
SURVEYOR Sir, a Chartreux167 friar,
His confessor, who fed him every minute
With words of sovereignty.
KING HENRY VIII How know’st thou this?
SURVEYOR Not long before your highness sped to France,
The Duke being at the Rose172, within the parish
St Lawrence Poultney173, did of me demand
What was the speech174 among the Londoners
Concerning the French journey. I replied
Men feared the French would prove perfidious176
To the king’s danger: presently177 the duke
Said ’twas the fear indeed and that he doubted178
’Twould prove the verity of certain words
Spoke by a holy monk that oft, says he,
‘Hath sent to me, wishing me to permit
John de la Car, my chaplain, a choice182 hour
To hear from him a matter of some moment183:
Whom after under the confession’s seal
He solemnly had sworn that what he spoke
My chaplain to no creature living but
To me should utter, with demure confidence187
This pausingly ensued: “Neither the king nor’s heirs,
Tell you the duke, shall prosper: bid him strive
To gain the love o’th’commonalty190: the duke
Shall govern England.” ’
QUEEN KATHERINE If I know you well,
You were the duke’s surveyor, and lost your office
On the complaint o’th’tenants: take good heed
You charge not in your spleen195 a noble person
And spoil your nobler196 soul: I say, take heed:
Yes, heartily beseech you.
KING HENRY VIII Let him on198:
To the Surveyor
Go forward.
SURVEYOR On my soul, I’ll speak but200 truth.
I told my lord the duke, by th’devil’s illusions
The monk might be deceived, and that ’twas dangerous
For him to ruminate on this so far, until
It forged204 him some design, which being believed,
It was much like to do205: he answered, ‘Tush,
It can do me no damage’, adding further,
That had the king in his last sickness failed207,
The cardinal’s and Sir Thomas Lovell’s heads
Should have gone off.
KING HENRY VIII Ha? What, so rank210? Ah, ha!
There’s mischief in this man: canst thou say further?
SURVEYOR I can, my liege.
KING HENRY VIII Proceed.
SURVEYOR Being at Greenwich214,
After your highness had reproved the duke
About Sir William Bulmer—
KING HENRY VIII I remember
Of such a time: being my sworn servant,
The duke retained him his219. But on: what hence?
SURVEYOR ‘If’, quoth he, ‘I for this had been committed220’ —
As to the Tower, I thought, — ‘I would have played
The part my father meant to act upon
Th’usurper Richard, who, being at Salisbury223,
Made suit224 to come in’s presence: which if granted,
As he made semblance of his duty225, would
Have put his knife to him.’
KING HENRY VIII A giant traitor.
CARDINAL WOLSEY Now, madam, may his highness live in freedom,
And this man out of prison?
QUEEN KATHERINE God mend all230.
KING HENRY VIII There’s something more would out of thee: what say’st?
SURVEYOR After ‘the duke his father’, with ‘the knife’,
He stretched him233, and with one hand on his dagger,
Another spread on’s breast, mounting234 his eyes,
He did discharge a horrible oath, whose tenor
Was, were he evil used, he would outgo236
His father by as much as a performance
Does an irresolute238 purpose.
KING HENRY VIII There’s his period239:
To sheathe his knife in us: he is attached240:
Call him to present241 trial: if he may
Find mercy in the law, ’tis his: if none,
Let him not seek’t of us: by day and night,
He’s traitor to th’height244.
Exeunt
Act 1 Scene 3
running scene 2 continues
Enter [the] Lord Chamberlain and Lord Sands
CHAMBERLAIN Is’t possible the spells of France should juggle1
Men into such strange mysteries2?
SANDS New customs,
Though they be never so ridiculous,
Nay, let ’em be5 unmanly, yet are followed.
CHAMBERLAIN As far as I see, all the good our English
Have got by the late7 voyage is but merely
A fit or two o’th’face: but they are shrewd8 ones,
For when they hold ’em9, you would swear directly
Their very noses had been counsellors
To Pepin or Clotharius, they keep state so11.
SANDS They have all new legs, and lame ones: one would take it12,
That never see ’em pace before, the spavin13
Or springhalt14 reigned among ’em.
CHAMBERLAIN Death15, my lord,
Their clothes are after such a pagan cut to’t16
That sure they’ve worn out17 Christendom.
Enter Sir Thomas Lovell
How now?
What news, Sir Thomas Lovell?
LOVELL Faith, my lord,
I hear of none, but the new proclamation
That’s clapped21 upon the court gate.
CHAMBERLAIN What is’t for?
LOVELL The reformation of our travelled gallants,
That fill the court with quarrels, talk and tailors.
CHAMBERLAIN I’m glad ’tis there: now I would pray our monsieurs
To think an English courtier may be wise,
And never see the Louvre27.
LOVELL They must either,
For so run the conditions, leave those remnants
Of fool and feather30 that they got in France,
With all their honourable points of ignorance31
Pertaining thereunto — as fights and fireworks32,
Abusing33 better men than they can be
Out of a foreign wisdom, renouncing clean34
The faith they have in tennis and tall stockings35,
Short blistered breeches, and those types of travel36 —
And understand again like honest37 men,
Or pack to their old playfellows38: there, I take it,
They may cum privilegio ‘oui’39 away
The lag end of their lewdness40 and be laughed at.
SANDS ’Tis time to give ’em physic41, their diseases
Are grown so catching.
CHAMBERLAIN What a loss our ladies
Will have of these trim vanities44!
LOVELL Ay, marry45,
There will be woe indeed, lords: the sly whoresons46
Have got a speeding trick to lay down47 ladies:
A French song and a fiddle has no fellow48.
SANDS The devil fiddle49 ’em! I am glad they are going,
For sure there’s no converting of ’em50: now
An honest country lord, as I am, beaten
A long time out of play, may bring his plainsong52
And have an hour of hearing, and, by’r lady53,
Held current54 music too.
CHAMBERLAIN Well said, Lord Sands:
Your colt’s tooth is not cast56 yet?
SANDS No, my lord,
Nor shall not, while I have a stump58.
To Lovell
CHAMBERLAIN Sir Thomas,
Whither were you a-going?
LOVELL To the cardinal’s:
Your lordship is a guest too.
CHAMBERLAIN O, ’tis true:
This night he makes64 a supper, and a great one,
To many lords and ladies: there will be
The beauty of this kingdom, I’ll assure you.
LOVELL That churchman bears a bounteous mind indeed,
A hand as fruitful68 as the land that feeds us:
His dews69 fall everywhere.
CHAMBERLAIN No doubt he’s noble:
He had a black mouth that said other71 of him.
SANDS He may, my lord, he’s wherewithal72 in him:
Sparing73 would show a worse sin than ill doctrine:
Men of his way74 should be most liberal:
They are set here for examples.
CHAMBERLAIN True, they are so:
But few now give so great ones. My barge stays77:
To Lovell
Your lordship shall along78. Come, good Sir Thomas,
We shall be late else, which I would not be,
For I was spoke to80, with Sir Henry Guildford,
This night to be comptrollers81.
SANDS I am your lordship’s82.
Exeunt
Act 1 Scene 4
running scene 3
Hautboys. A small table under a state for the Cardinal, a longer table for the guests. Then enter Anne Bullen, and divers other Ladies and Gentlemen, as guests at one door; at another door enter Sir Henry Guildford
GUILDFORD Ladies, a general welcome from his grace
Salutes ye all: this night he dedicates
To fair content and you: none here, he hopes,
In all this noble bevy4, has brought with her
One care abroad5: he would have all as merry
As, first, good company, good wine, good welcome,
Can make good people.
Enter Lord Chamberlain, Lords Sands and Lovell
To Chamberlain
O, my lord, you’re tardy:
The very thought of this fair company
Clapped9 wings to me.
CHAMBERLAIN You are young, Sir Harry Guildford.
SANDS Sir Thomas Lovell, had the cardinal
But half my lay12 thoughts in him, some of these
Should find a running banquet13 ere they rested
I think would better please ’em: by my life,
They are a sweet society15 of fair ones.
LOVELL O, that your lordship were but now confessor16
To one or two of these.
SANDS I would I were:
They should find easy penance19.
LOVELL Faith, how easy?
SANDS As easy as a down21 bed would afford it.
To Guildford
CHAMBERLAIN Sweet ladies, will it please you sit?— Sir Harry,
Place you23 that side, I’ll take the charge of this:
His grace is ent’ring. Nay, you must not freeze:
Two women placed together makes cold25 weather:
My lord Sands, you are one will keep ’em waking26:
Pray sit between these ladies.
SANDS By my faith,
He sits between Anne and another lady
And thank29 your lordship.—
By your leave, sweet ladies,
If I chance to talk a little wild30, forgive me:
I had it from my father.
ANNE Was he mad32, sir?
SANDS O, very mad, exceeding mad, in love too:
But he would bite34 none: just as I do now,
He kisses her
He would kiss you twenty with a breath35.
CHAMBERLAIN Well said36, my lord.
So now you’re fairly37 seated: gentlemen,
The penance lies on you, if these fair ladies
Pass away39 frowning.
SANDS For my little cure40,
Let me alone41.
Hautboys. Enter Cardinal Wolsey, and takes his state
CARDINAL WOLSEY You’re welcome, my fair guests: that noble lady
Or gentleman that is not freely merry,
Is not my friend. This, to confirm my welcome,
He drinks
And to you all, good health.
SANDS Your grace is noble:
Let me have such a bowl may47 hold my thanks,
And save me so much talking.
CARDINAL WOLSEY My lord Sands,
I am beholding to you: cheer50 your neighbours:
Ladies, you are not merry: gentlemen,
Whose fault is this?
SANDS The red wine first must rise
In their fair cheeks, my lord, then we shall have ’em
Talk us to silence.
ANNE You are a merry gamester56,
My lord Sands.
SANDS Yes, if I make my play58:
Here’s to your ladyship: and pledge it59, madam,
For ’tis to such a thing60—
ANNE You cannot show me.
SANDS I told your grace they would talk anon62.
Drum and Trumpet: chambers discharged
CARDINAL WOLSEY What’s that?
To Servants
CHAMBERLAIN Look out there, some of ye.
CARDINAL WOLSEY What warlike voice65,
Exit Servants
And to what end is this? Nay, ladies, fear not:
By all the laws of war you’re privileged67.
Enter a Servant
CHAMBERLAIN How now, what is’t?
SERVANT A noble troop of strangers69,
For so they seem: they’ve left their barge and landed,
And hither make71, as great ambassadors
From foreign princes.
CARDINAL WOLSEY Good Lord Chamberlain,
Go, give ’em welcome: you can speak the French tongue:
And pray receive ’em nobly, and conduct ’em
Into our presence, where this heaven of beauty76
Shall shine at full upon them. Some attend him.
[Exit Chamberlain, attended]
All rise, and tables removed
You have now a broken78 banquet, but we’ll mend it.
A good digestion to you all: and once more
I shower a welcome on ye: welcome all.
Hautboys. Enter King [Henry] and others as Masquers, habited like shepherds, ushered by the Lord Chamberlain. They pass directly before the Cardinal, and gracefully salute him
A noble company: what are their pleasures81?
CHAMBERLAIN Because they speak no English, thus they prayed
To tell your grace: that having heard by fame83
Of this so noble and so fair assembly
King John & Henry VIII Page 20