by Arden, Mari
I try to listen again, but the voice is gone.
We travel further into the cave until the only light available are torches and candles that burn dimmer than embers. Even the color from our red dresses has faded, vanishing as shadowed veils.
As if she senses my thoughts, Chloris whispers, "You'll get used to it."
I'm afraid I won't because the further we go in, the less I feel of myself. Darkness is all around us, and my thoughts are evaporating into air. Soon I think nothing, feel nothing, see nothing, but black shadows all around.
I don't know we've stopped until I bump into the person in front of me. She doesn't acknowledge what I do, so I don't say sorry. We're moving slow, and I wonder why. Someone is handing out helmets with a light attached. It's weak, but it's better than nothing. Putting it on, I'm grateful when the faint beam flashes ahead. We keep walking, and I'm suddenly glad I ate the disgusting soup from this morning because I have a suspicion what we'll be doing in this cave is work.
We start going down on a slope, then we walk down a flight of stairs. It's as dark as before so I don't know if we're underground. The silence is deafening, and I want to turn back so bad. I don't, and even though my mind is afraid, my body isn't, and it keeps moving even when I'm too scared to. We keep walking and walking and when we finally stop, I'm a little breathless. I don't doubt we're miles from the cave entrance.
A pair of glowing eyes light up a feminine face, and she stands on a chair above us. The light on her helmet is a little brighter, and she aims it over our heads. "This is what we are looking for." She holds something small between her fingers, but no matter how my eyes strain I can't see it. "If you are new, raise your hand and I will come closer so you can see it." She pauses, but no hands rise.
Chloris's tail touches my ankles, and she shakes her head.
I already know. I'm not dumb enough to declare myself a newbie, I say with my eyes. I'd be fresh meat for those bastards.
"Crystals," Chloris murmurs so softly I almost think I imagine it.
"This cave is vast. This area is rich with Braxi. It should not be hard to find." She pauses, staring hard at us. "You only have to dig for it." She throws a shovel to the person in front of her, and she falls, knocking down the person behind her. The Saguinox female makes an annoyed sound and jumps down. Her hand lashes out. The slap echoes around us, followed by desperate weeping and begging.
"Get up," she snarls. "I have no time to waste on your useless human tears!" She slaps the girl again, and we jump back, making room for her to come through. Her hand brushes against mine as she moves by, and I feel a chill that has nothing to do with the cave temperature.
"The shovels are up ahead," Chloris informs me when the Saguinox footsteps can no longer be heard. She shows me the way. The tools are dirty and smelly, but I know better than to complain. There are a few guards with us, but they don't seem too alert. There are more than fifty prisoners down here, and only a handful of Saguinox, yet they are unafraid. One is dozing off as I walk by. Why don't we revolt? I think. The odds are in our favor. I turn back to where we got the shovels. From where I'm at I can see carts and carts full of shovels, brushes, wedges and sledgehammers. Suddenly, I feel something inside; it's pounding beneath my skin.
"I want the sledgehammer," I say to Chloris.
She looks at me like I'm crazy. "We're looking for crystals, Kenna, not breaking a wall. Trust me, shovels are best."
I don't say more because I need time to think through what I want to do. I'm so close behind her I have to be careful not to step on her tail. "Chloris."
"Hmm?" She's maneuvering around the other prisoners, going in deeper.
I hesitate for just a moment. "If you don't mind me asking, what are you?"
"Shape shifter."
This time I stumble behind her, falling onto my knees. Unfortunately, there's also a rock underneath me, and the edge connects with my bone. I hiss, but don't make a loud enough sound to catch the guard's attention.
"Kenna! Are you okay?" She sounds anxious. I rub my knee.
"Just… not expecting that."
She gives me a smile, and her eyes are gentle. "There's a lot humans don' t know about."
I'm reminded of Lenora's conversation with me earlier. You're just a baby planet, she'd said.
"Yeah, I'm learning that."
She helps me up. Her hand is like mine, but green and with longer nails.
"Do you come from a different planet, too?" I ask, wiping my bottom.
"My ancestors a long time ago, probably. But I'm an earthling like you, born and raised." She has my shovel in her hands, and she hands it back. "Come on."
She's moving, but I'm rooted to the floor, stunned. She'd been born and raised here? How's that possible? How many others are out there?
"Are there more like you?" I whisper.
"Some like me. Some not."
My mind's racing with questions. Her words echo in my brain. Some like me. Some not. What does that mean? Is she referring to different species of aliens? Is she the good guy, and the others are bad? More importantly, can I trust her? Chloris turns back, waiting for me to catch up.
Do I follow?
I look around at the other prisoners whose gaze refuse to touch mine. I turn back to Chloris. Her eyes are curious.
She's the only one willing to help.
I don't have a choice. Not really. Not if I want to escape.
Chloris takes me to a spot more secluded from the others, and shows me how to dig.
"The Braxi crystals are small and white. Try to dig without cracking them. They're no use broken or cracked. They need to be perfect." She demonstrates, shoveling a handful of dirt each time. She's careful to not push too hard, and wiggles the tool, rather than pushing it in. I imitate her, but it isn't natural. The shovel is so heavy I want to use its weight to push down, but I have to resist, and use my arms to make it light. She has to crouch every few minutes, and use her hands and the light on her helmet to search for the small crystals. It takes a long time, but when she finally gets one, she shows me. I adjust the light, and stare in awe at the perfect white crystal. It's oval shaped, and glitters. I take it in my hand. It feels warm. I make a fist around it, and when I feel something, my eyes shoot up to Chloris.
"It's vibrating," I breathe.
"They're used to store energy and magic," she informs. A small smile lights up her face. "Beautiful, isn't it?"
I'm in shock, but I agree. Shape shifters? Crystals that store magic? "How has all of this stayed hidden?" I don't just mean the crystals and she seems to understand that.
"Humans see and hear what they want to see and hear. Arrogance can make you blind."
Still bewildered, I shake my head. My fists close around the Braxi again to feel the pleasant sensation. "What do they need these crystals for?"
"Evil." She says it quietly, but with such sadness I'm speechless.
The Saguinox don't mean to join us.
"They mean to conquer us." My whispered realization is met with silence.
Chloris and I stare at each other. Her eyes are large and sad. Hopeless.
Discouraged, we don't talk anymore. For a long time there is only silence as we work. She demonstrates how to use the shovels to dig the cave walls. My stomach is rumbling, and I'm thirsty. Chloris takes me to a small water stand and a worker hands me a little cup.
"Don't drink too much," she warns me. "There's nowhere to relieve yourself." I'm angry when I drink. "We're just animals to them." I watch a guard as he casually leans on a worker, using her head to lean on.
"Yes," Chloris affirms.
I turn angrily to her. "How can you just accept this?"
Her eyes are wide, and she sneaks a glance at the worker before shaking her head. I bite my lip. "Come on." She gestures and we go back to our stations.
I try to talk, but she doesn't want to anymore. I rebuke myself for letting my true feelings come through. I need her to give me information. I find the sledgehammers and sho
vels. I dare not stare at them too long, but my heart is racing with determination again. I can't stop myself from getting closer.
"Switching shovels," I murmur to Chloris, and leave before she can argue. It doesn't feel right, but I try to soften my loud feet. That doesn't work, and I'm thankful that like in the real world, no one seems to notice me much here. I hope Chloris won't notice how long I'm gone.
I'm the only one near the sledgehammers, and I pick one up, feeling the weight of it in my hands. I admire the rusty metal head, and a certain handsome face with glowing eyes flitters in my head. Yes, this will work just fine.
I clutch it tightly in my hand and casually walk forward, away from Chloris and the other workers. I try to move slowly so as not to arouse suspicion. I move past more prisoners, their scarlet attire more visible with their helmet lights. For the first time, I wonder what the red dress means. Rhys and Lenora had referred to it as "the offering". Maybe the Saguinox have some ritual where people are "offered" to an alien god. It doesn't sound far-fetched, and feeling a deep apprehension, I keep walking.
The slope is moving upward, and there are no workers beyond this point. It's careless to keep going so I stop. I dig, using the sledgehammer and my hands. I should've brought the shovel too, I think. My heart's dancing wildly in my chest. Please stay invisible, please stay invisible.
It takes time, but I finally get it. The hole is big and deep enough to hide a sledgehammer. I glance around, careful to look nonchalant. When I'm sure no one is watching I shove it in, and frantically cover the sledgehammer with hardened dirt, and any other materials I can find. I take in air, and it smells like dirt and metal. I'm so busy breathing I don't notice the body until my head connects with an elbow. I gasp, turn around, and instantly fall back.
Her glowing eyes are cold, and scrunched in anger. I can't help but stare back with wide eye panic.
"Where did you come from?" she snarls. Her short hair is spiked up like a boy's, and she's looking menacingly at me. "Answer me."
"I-I…" For a second my mind is blank. She looks so threatening and so terrifying that my mind is frozen. I can't feel the sledgehammer underneath me, but my heart's beating violently.
"Don't you know how to talk?" She wrinkles her nose. "You're not one of those mute humans, are you?"
I shake my head. "No."
Suddenly her hands lash out, and she has the back of my head. She carries half my body off the ground, pulling painfully at my hair. "Don't think I didn't notice you here by yourself. Did you think you would get away with that?"
I can't talk. I can't breathe, and she jerks me to my feet. "Lazy scum. You humans are the worst." She pulls me by my hair, dragging me like a bag so hard I cry out. I'm pushed against something hard. The metal tub connects with my shoulder blade, and my skin instantly tears. The pain burns.
Out of nowhere I see a flame in my mind. It's exquisite, and it's swaying gently, ready to go where I need it to go. I know exactly where it needs to shoot, but before I can, a voice shouts in my head.
No! The voice sounds alarmed. No flames, take it out!
I shriek.
The voice is back in my head.
Something hard is shoved into my arms. A shovel.
"Everyone works in the caves," the Saguinox guard informs me coldly. "You're no exception. If I catch you slacking off again, you'll be given to the crystal. Do you understand?" She pushes me back. "Do you?"
I nod, but I don't look at her. I'm shaking. My mind feels numb, like something heavy's inside. I'm so focused inside myself that I can't look at her. She takes it as a sign of submission. I wait, and even when the sound of her footsteps has disappeared, I can't move. My insides feel jumpy, and I'm anxious, and tense and fearful, and all of it twists in my gut like a cyclone.
I'm trembling so bad I don't notice the smell of burning metal underneath my fingers until my eyes sting from the smoke.
I drop the shovel and jump back.
It's smoldering.
* * *
It's dark when we're allowed back outside. My back aches, and I'm glad to walk with my head low, because it hurts to straighten my body. Supper is comprised of the same disgusting soup. It tastes like what I'd imagine liquid roots would taste like. Even though I'm starving my hunger isn't enough to drown out the revolting taste, so I sip at it, each mouthful worse than the last.
Chloris is ignoring me, although I catch her shooting me an empathetic look when she hears me gag on the food. No one talks. No one moves unless told to, and I actually feel relieved to go back my cell.
When the door closes blackness envelope me. I try to sleep, but pictures of my parents churn in my mind like a broken movie. I miss my dad, and if I breathe deeply enough I can smell past the perfume of alcohol on his clothes, to the woodsy scent of his skin. I wonder if he's searching for me. When I think about how lost he must be, I feel a hot rage inside, and it's all I can do to not pound against the walls, screaming. But I don’t want to give them the satisfaction of seeing me do that, so I pull my knees to my chest instead.
My mind wanders back to what happened in the caves earlier, but I shut my eyes, refusing to acknowledge it. I'm so cold, and a memory of mom, dad and I sipping hot chocolate during a wintry night drifts into my mind. I remember the warmth, and I sigh, pretending that it's here. I hear the fireplace in my head. I see the dark orange blaze, twirling like dancers over and under the logs. The flames bend, swinging in a contained space and I imagine touching it, feeling it through my body…
I fall asleep with the flames brushing my face, feeling more alone than ever. As I drift into unconsciousness, the tender promise whispers inside my head. I'll always be here.
Chapter 13
An alarm rings, screeching through dreams of glowing eyes and fire. I jerk awake, and notice that I'm still in the same position from the night before. I stretch my neck, arms and legs, feeling lighter as I realize my body is back in working order. The alarm sounds again, and the buzzing hurts my ears. There is a loudspeaker in the room somewhere. I stand.
Walking, I peer through the door. I try to look for faces, but the windows are small, and the lights dim. I see nothing but an empty corridor with gray walls. It reminds me of a nightmare I had, and goose bumps ripple over my arms.
"All clear."
Someone's walking, and I press my face against the glass to see. He has dark hair and eyes, and his lips are turned in a frown. There are two other men with him. All three look ahead, their glowing eyes a beacon in the dark. He nods, and the sounds of opening doors rumble in the corridor. I step back as the door of my own personal prison push out. My hands tighten on the handle, and with a shaky breath I shove the door forward, stepping out.
When I'm in the corridor I see there are about a dozen people standing with me. I gasp. I'm wrong. There are a dozen people and other creatures standing with me.
My eyes are wide. I can't help but stare at the one closest to me. Her skin is green, completely and vibrantly green. Her black irises are large and luminous. Her body is shaped like a human girl, but scales that cover her chest, belly, and crotch. A tail hangs behind her, and I only notice it because she swings it, sweeping it to the front. Her feet have toes, but they're oval shaped, and are like green raindrops. She's not wearing a dress, but a red shawl covers her. It's the same color as mine, and she pushes the hood over her face. She turns to the Saguinox, and I do, too.
"You will be fed this morning, and then you will return to the caves to harvest. Tomorrow some of you will offer yourselves to the crystal." There is a collective sound of horror, and I look around, afraid. He is unperturbed. "Do as you're told. Escape is an illusion. Should you try," -a malicious smile appears on his face- "he will find you."
I'm not sure who "he" is, but the alarm on every person's face makes me not want to find out.
As suddenly as he comes, he leaves, and the people to my left turn. I follow knowing that my survival depends on my ability to blend in.
We march like soldiers,
each behind the other, heads bowed. The corners of my eyes scan my new surroundings, taking note of the nightmare I've suddenly found myself in. We join other rows of people, all dressed in scarlet red. Even though it's hard to see, I put the pieces together like a puzzle. Cells line either side of me, and I know there's more than one level because I can hear the same monotone footsteps echoing above. It looks exactly like what I'd imagine a prison to look like, but instead of white walls, gray is the color most used. We pass by what I assume are guards, though they're dressed casually in shirts and jeans. They're probably dressed that way to blend in when they leave the prison. Anything less might cause suspicion.
Glowing eyes watch us. Each gaze is filled with disgust, and their thoughts are reflected on their faces: we are inferior. They're the superior.
A few Saguinox hold weapons like guns and daggers, but the majority don't. They don't have to. The warning is palpable, even to me: obey or else.
I feel like a lamb, moving toward her slaughter. We enter into a cafeteria -like space. The tables are placed in straight rows. They're cafeteria tables, but metal handcuffs are attached to the center of each. I can smell food, but instead of making me hungry, it has the opposite affect and I want to vomit.
We're herded into two lines. They give us wooden bowls and a spoon, and watching the others, I kneel to receive the meager portion. The silence is delicate, and I try desperately to quiet my stomping, but my fear seems to have made my feet louder. My only consolation is that, like everywhere else, everyone here ignores me. They don't hear my feet. Or maybe they do, but they just don't care.
I follow the person ahead of me to my seat. There are guards around, but no one moves to handcuff us. Instead, the prisoners do it themselves. I observe the girl beside me adjusting one handcuff over her left hand. I feel sick, watching her. What kind of perverted game is this? They're forcing us to confine our bodies, to do the one thing we're desperate not to do.