by Mj Fields
He moved back to my lips and gave me one last kiss before the connection was gone. I didn’t dare open my eyes. I wouldn’t know what to say. His hands caressed my cheek and face as he kissed my forehead.
When I felt his hand leave my face and the bed shift I finally opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. I glanced over and he was doing the same. I quickly looked away so he wouldn’t see me. His arm reached across my body to grab my hand furthest from him. He pulled it gently so that I was in the same position I woke in this morning.
His arm wrapped around behind me and he held me.
“That was--.”
“My dick is hard. I swear to God one more word I’m gonna come in my pants. Please, I am asking you as nice as I know how Irish, shut the fuck up and go to sleep.”
I wasn’t sure how I would go to sleep. All I could think about was how good he tasted against my lips. How attentive he was. How it wasn’t just a kiss, his lips caressed my face. The sounds that came out of him I had never heard before. All I could think about was wanting more.
“Xavier?”
“You trying to make me crazy, it’s working.”
“Thank you.”
He placed a kiss on my head and rested his chin there.
~
I woke and it was already getting dark. I could smell him. Xavier smelled of body wash and a light touch of cologne. Very clean, very sexy, and not overpowering.
I sat up and stretched. I looked around wondering where he was. On the nightstand was a bottle of water and a couple ibuprofens. I took the pills and drank them down. The water was still cold so I knew he must be around.
I got out of the most comfortable bed I had ever slept in and went into a bathroom bigger than the one at my family’s home. My duffle was sitting on the counter and I dug through it until I found a comb and a hair clip. I tried to make sense of my hair planning to just clip the sides up but there was no sense to be made. I twisted it into a mock French twist and clipped it up. Then I brushed my teeth.
I walked down the hall, down the stairs, and I could smell something delicious.
I walked towards the music playing softly and found Xavier standing with his back towards me. A towel was thrown over his shoulder covering very little of his bare back.
He had changed into black sweats that hung just low enough on his hips so that I could see the top of his ass. He was tapping a wooden spoon on the counter to the beat of Wake Me Up by Avicii. The chorus started and his head started moving a little. When the music took over the song and the vocals paused he seemed to get into it even more.
Then I heard him start to sing and he was pretty good. He reached over the pot to turn down the burner as he stirred what I assumed was pasta.
“Fuck!” He pulled his arm back and dropped the spoon. “Son of a bitch!”
He bent to pick up the spoon and looked back at me.
“Mornin’.” He stood and smiled. “You hungry?”
“Yeah. Let me help you.”
“No you sit.”
He started towards the sink and then turned to me slowly and walked towards me. I felt my face turning red and I looked up.
“I don’t want this to be awkward so I’m gonna kiss you this time.”
“How will that not be--.”
His mouth covered mine; arms wrapped around me, grabbed my ass with both hands, and pulled me tight against him.
My mouth opened to him unintentionally and he made that sound again. I held onto his biceps and they flexed to my touch. His tongue rubbed against mine and he licked deeper into my mouth. He pulled his mouth away quickly and looked at me. His teeth clenched, the muscles in his jaw popped, and as he inhaled deeply though his nose, it flared.
His grip loosened on my ass and I let go of his arms. His fingers rubbed up and down my butt as he closed his eyes. I looked down and saw his sweats were tented. He was huge. I felt my pussy clench from just the thought of him inside me.
I looked up and he was looking into my eyes. “I cannot wait to fuck you.” I turned away avoiding the intensity of his stare. “When you’re better. I’m gonna show you everything you’ve been missing and then some. But not yet.” He leaned in and kissed my cheek. “Sit down, dinner’s done.”
He spooned pasta and meat sauce onto two plates and grabbed some rolls from inside the oven.
“It’s not much. I hope you like it.”
“Italian. Spaghetti.” I smiled.
“Irish. Cabbage.” He winked.
“Hmm.”
“You have the sexiest lips…”
I started choking and he pushed water towards me and smirked. I took a drink and rolled my eyes.
“I wonder if -- never mind.”
“No, not fair. Spill it.”
“Fine, I was saving you the embarrassment but I wondered when you blushed does your entire body get pink?”
“Not sure. I’ll let you know next time I’m naked in front of a mirror blushing.”
“I was also wondering if your pussy lips tasted as good as the lips on your face.”
I looked up from my plate and into his dancing eyes. He was trying to embarrass me.
“Well I’m not sure about that either. What do you think?”
“Oh you don’t want to know what I think.”
“Maybe you just don’t think--.”
“Pink hearts, yellow moons, orange stars, green clovers, and blue diamonds. I think you’re going to be magically delicious.”
I swallowed and shook my head and then laughed. “Is that what it will be like?”
“When you’re ready for it yes.” He chuckled and spun spaghetti on his fork and took a bite. “It’s good.”
We ate in silence for a few minutes. I had never seen anyone eat the way he did or maybe I had never taken such personal interest in the workings of a human being’s mouth. The way he had kissed me was so stimulating and suggestive to just how skillful Xavier would be with his mouth. I loved the way he sucked the pasta off the fork and his tongue licking his lips between bites was causing me to eat slower just so I could see the way his mouth worked.
“You sleep well?” He asked as I finally took a bite.
“Like I was on a cloud.” I nodded. “Has to be the most comfortable bed I’ve ever slept in.”
“How long have you lived in that apartment of yours?”
“Almost four years.”
“You slept on an air mattress for four--.”
“No I have a bed. Well had a bed, a couch, a dresser, a flat screen, and stereo system.” I huffed. “The only thing I want back is my grandmothers little bed side table.”
“You get robbed?”
“Not exactly.”
He dropped his fork and his brows burrowed. “He got all your stuff?”
“I was supposed to be moving in with him. It’s not all my stuff. Some was acquired together in the past year that we lived together.”
“But your grandma’s table and the bed. You want them back?”
“The table yes. The bed, no. I don’t want that bed.”
His hands fisted on the table. “Too many good memories.”
“I thought they were but apparently not.”
“Did he make you come on that bed?” The vein in his forehead bulged as his facial features hardened.
“We were together for a while.” I didn’t want to tell him, no, not once.
“Right.” He nodded and stood up.
I helped him clear the table and clean the dishes. I also looked to see if he was still hard. I mean that thing was seriously impressive.
“You love him still? I mean if you loved him do you still?”
“I thought I loved him.” I reached for a washcloth. “But that makes me sick to my stomach now. I can’t believe how naive I was. I mean I am not a stupid girl. I just wanted someone not like my brothers you know? Not someone who thou
ght they owned me.”
“Men like your brothers probably take better care of what they own.”
“They have a commitment phobia just like you.” I laughed.
“Men like us?”
“Please don’t get your boxers in a bunch, you know what I mean.”
“Men like us don’t lie to get laid. We don’t suck off a woman. We take care of our shit, not rely on some naive girl to do it for us. We don’t prey on week minded people. Men like us are out there fucking girls who have been cheated on. Men like us are making them feel good about themselves. Men like us are honest with women like you.”
He looked angry but I am sure I looked angrier.
I set down the washcloth and walked out of the room.
“Taelyn. Don’t walk away from me!”
I didn’t respond. I ran up the stairs and slammed the door and dove under the covers. I wanted to leave but had no car. I even thought about calling home but I had no phone. So I laid back and covered up my head hoping he didn’t come back in the room.
He didn’t come in. I was glad, I didn’t want him to.
~
When I woke I was in his arms, crying.
“Shhh. I got you,” He whispered and held me tighter.
“I am so stupid. I am so--.”
“No you’re not. You expected his promises to be real. You believed he wouldn’t hurt you. You say your brothers are like me. But you say it with such contempt. The reality is it’s just what a girl like you needs--” I tried to pull away and he held tighter. “You’ll hear me out Taelyn. You were raised with, what I assume, is men of honor and pride by the boat load. It’s not something that can be taught, it’s something you not only heard but saw. Your heart didn’t have to be guarded because you knew you were raised by people of their word. It sucks that you were hurt, but I’ve seen people I love rebound from it. You’ll do the same. You’re so kind, so sweet, and--.”
“No I’m not. You don’t know what happened this morning! I am not sweet. I went home and showered. I laid in bed in that robe and waited for him to come home, when he didn’t I sent him a text telling him I needed him. He came. I knew he must not have been far away.”
“Go on.” He brushed my hair away from my face.
“When he walked in I laid on the air mattress and opened my robe and asked him why he had never licked me. He shook his head and reminded me what day it was and asked that I cover myself. I stood up and walked up to him totally naked and started undoing his pants. He pulled away and asked me what had gotten into me. He looked at me like I disgusted him. I wanted him to go down on me just once Xavier. I wanted him to look at me just once like he was burning inside for me. When he didn’t, I put my robe on and told him we were through. He got pissed and told me I wasn’t being rational. That’s when I told him I saw him. He asked me what the fuck I was doing there and I said I was there with you. I wanted to make him jealous. I wanted to hurt him like he did me. He went to grab me and I punched him right in the nose and that’s when he hit me. I tried to hit him again but he pushed me on air mattress and held my arms down. Then he knelt above me pinning my arms with his knees. He started undoing his pants and that’s when you called. I told him you would come after me. Told him you were expecting me and that we had spent the night together. He was stunned I think because I was able to push him away and I grabbed for the phone and saw it was you. That’s when he hit me again. The look on his face, well I’d never seen him look like that. I ran into the bathroom and locked the door. I heard the door to the apartment slam and he didn’t come back. I saw myself in the mirror. My lip was bleeding and I couldn’t think of anything but washing him off me. I jumped in the shower and washed his hands off me. His touch. If I could have washed the sight of him out of my eyes I would have. When I came out of the bathroom he was standing there with my phone. He didn’t look angry he looked hurt. He told me he was sorry and tried to reach out to me. I held up my hand and he stopped. He told me that he fucked up. He wouldn’t ever cheat on his wife. He said we should get married now so that he wouldn’t be tempted. He even said we could have a Catholic wedding, that he would spend every moment of his free time making it up to me. You sent a text and then he looked at me with such sadness. It didn’t make me feel what it should have. I knew he wanted to make me feel sorry for him. That’s the same look he always gave when he was trying to get his way. I never knew it then. I always just wanted to make sure he knew he had my support and that I loved him. I turned my back to him and took that little can of pepper spray my Dad insisted I keep with me. I put it in my pocket and turned around and looked at him. I smiled a smile that was meant to piss him off. ‘Why would I want you now? Why would you want me now after everything that went on last night?’ That’s about when he crushed my phone against the counter. Then he told me I would be sorry. He walked towards me and I held up the can of pepper spray and told him one more step and I would gladly pull the trigger just to watch a little pussy like him cry. He told me to watch my back and stomped on my phone one last time and walked out the door.”
“Jesus Christ. Thank God you’re okay. Taelyn you ever hear the expression don’t poke a sleeping bear?”
“It felt good. It felt good to hurt him. I will never let anyone hurt me like that again. I will never trust any--.”
“You’ll trust. Just not some mother fucker who doesn’t deserve it.”
“Who hurt you? Who made you be able to just have sex and not get emotional?”
“No one hurt me. I’ve seen two of my brothers get royally fucked and I just decided it wasn’t gonna happen to me.”
“So you’re happy like this?’
“Yeah. No one ever gave me a reason to want to be any other way. I don’t lie to get laid. I told you that.”
“I’ll never confuse love and desire again.”
“Good cause they are two different things. When you’ve made it through the hurt, I will be the first one to show you what it’s like in my world got it?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay. Did he give you the message about work?”
“No.”
“We’ll be working in the office this week. Our space is too damn cold.”
“So everyone will see this face.” I didn’t realize it was out loud.
“Relocating here then?”
“We could?”
“Irish you should realize I can make shit happen. We just need a couple computers and a new cell phone for you.”
“Will you be here the entire time?”
He looked at me with a blank stare before answering, “No. I have things I’ll have to do. But James will be at your disposal. There’s enough food and everything else will be here in the morning. I want you scouring the Internet for local talent. Find where they will be performing. Then, if we like them, you do your magic and stalk them on the web. We need mad talent signed with us at go. Can you handle that?”
“Of course I can.” We were back to all business and I sat up and grabbed for the water on the nightstand. There was a fresh bottle and some ibuprofen, “Thanks.”
“I’m gonna shower. You get some sleep.”
“Will you be here again tonight? I mean…”
“I hadn’t planned on it.”
He stood looking at me. “I’m gonna turn on some music. You good with that?”
“Sure.”
I laid down and music filled the room through a kick ass built-in surround sound system I hadn’t noticed before.
The song Come Along by Vicci Martinez and Cee Lo Green started. I don’t know why but my body seemed to awaken. The awareness of what was just in the other room beckoning to me, the sexual being inside me that I had ignored for so long awoke from a three year slumber. The desire deep inside coming to a head, brought on by the way Xavier Steel looked at my body with those sexy as hell hazel eyes.
I stood up and walked towards the bathroom. I stop
ped briefly as insecurity caused by being told no for so long stalled me, but only for a moment. Xavier Steel with his luscious lips, trained tongue, and a body that looked like it was made to please a woman was naked; the only thing stopping me was my own insecurity and a door that wasn’t completely closed.
I opened the door and looked at the shower. I saw his arms rise as he washed his hair. Hair that I wanted in my hands. I felt the pulse that was faintly noticeable between my legs only a moment ago quicken. A burn started building, one that could turn into an inferno by his touch.
I turned and looked in the mirror that was beginning to fog up and unclipped my hair and ran my fingers through it. I slipped my pants off and then pulled my sweatshirt over my head. And looked at myself.
The song ended and I saw his phone. I hit repeat before the next started. I turned to walk towards the shower and stopped when I saw him looking at me through the eyes of a man who appeared to be starving. He cinched the towel around his waist and leaned against the wall. His eyes raked my body from head to toe. His heated eyes now burning and turning black.
“Took you long enough.” His voice had a gravely sound to it.
“I decided to see if I blushed everywhere and wanted you to know, I don’t.”
He took a step towards me.
“Irish, you are so fucking sexy.”
The song started again and his lips curled up on one side. “We’ve already wasted six minutes and forty seconds”
He took another step towards me, I leaned in to kiss him, and he leaned back, avoiding. For a moment I felt the insecurities return. Until he reached around me and grabbed my ass in both hands and lifted me and set me on the counter.
He stepped back. “Did you hear that?”
“No.” I closed my eyes.
“Your hot little ass just sizzled when I sat you down on the cold granite. Now where do I begin?” He took my hands. “Open up those eyes. I don’t want you to miss seeing what a real man can do to you.”