by Caroline Lee
Gosh.
It seemed like his imagination was as wild as hers. “You really…?”
“I care about you, Sadie.” He dropped a quick kiss to her lips, and then began to walk again. She enjoyed being tucked up against his warmth. “I love the way you’re open and enthusiastic about everything—even glitter markers—and I love how well you fit into our lives, even if our lives are pretty cramped to begin with.”
Sadie opened her mouth to protest, to tell him she loved the cozy life he’d built for his daughter and himself, but his gentle squeeze of her shoulders told her to let him finish.
“Seeing what you’ve done for Violet, seeing how special you’ve made her feel, I don’t…” He took a deep breath as they neared the ranch’s entrance. “I’m going to cancel my entry in the Spirit of Riston competition.”
“What?” That hadn’t been at all what she was expecting him to say. She pulled out from under his arm and blasted him with her full incredulity. “What does that contest have to do with anything?”
He watched her for a moment, then shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets and took the last few steps towards the bus stop. Staring down the road, he said, “Your shop is your dream, Sadie. I know how hard you work for it, and I want it to be a success. Winning that contest would mean you get the carousel you’ve been planning for, and make sure your shop will be the success you’ve been dreaming about.”
That was ridiculous. She was doing fine as it was, without the darn carousel. “Yeah,” she spluttered, “But what about you? If you win that contest, the camps will be super-popular from all of the publicity. You’d be making a bunch of kids happy, and making the camps a profitable option for the ranch to continue.” She took a step towards him, trying to make him understand. “And that would mean you wouldn’t have to move on. You could stay here in Riston to work for the ranch.” You could stay with me.
From the way Shawn didn’t meet her eyes, he was well-aware of that little fact. He was willing to deliberately give up his and Violet’s chance to stay here in Riston…for her?
When he didn’t respond, Sadie got angry. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard, Shawn. My shop has survived without the carousel or the extra publicity. Your camps are brand-new and need that win.”
His jaw—just about the only thing she could see, because of the way he’d turned away from her—tightened. “You don’t know that. They could do just fine on their own.”
Throwing up her hands in frustration, Sadie resisted the urge to stamp her booted foot. “You’re just being stubborn. If anyone should back out of the contest, it should be me. I want you to win, Shawn.” To her surprise, she heard her voice catch in her throat, and told herself the tears in her eyes were out of frustration. “But for all you—and I—know, Buttons and Bows in town might win again this year!”
He shrugged again and Sadie held her breath, willing him to see reason. She would gladly withdraw from the contest, if she could be sure he’d win.
Didn’t he understand how badly she needed him to stay here?
Finally, he took a deep breath and turned to face her once more. She balled her hands into fists, and willed her racing heart to calm enough to hear what he had to say. There was a sadness, and acceptance, in his expression. In the way the skin around his beautiful eyes crinkled as he looked at her.
“I’m sorry, Sadie.” He shrugged and sighed. “I can’t do it. I can’t compete against you. I…I care too much for you.”
“You care?” She took an incredulous step backwards, and then another, as if trying to distance herself from his unwillingness to see reason. “If you really cared, Shawn, you wouldn’t be agreeing to leave—” Leave me. She choked off the rest of the confession.
Before he could reply—before she gave him a chance to reply—Sadie turned back towards the ranch. How could he kiss her like that, how could he tell her he cared, and then get all stupidly chivalrous and give up his chance to stay here with her?
He might’ve called her name, but she was too busy running away from him.
CHAPTER EIGHT
Three days. It’d been three days since she’d seen Shawn—kissed Shawn. Three horrible days during which she’d debated going to find him…wondering if he’d thought about her at all. He’d kissed her, and told her he’d cared for her, but was it high school all over again? Was she just Sadie, the plump ice-cream-loving weirdo with odd dreams? Had he meant any of it?
Julia had kicked her out of the shop, telling Sadie that her moping was depressing the customers. So Sadie dished up a container of the Berry-Berry ice cream she made yesterday—although she wasn’t sure her bad mood hadn’t affected the mixture—and decided she’d take it to Jaclyn.
So that’s why she was knocking on the kind old lady’s door late Monday afternoon. Maybe Jaclyn would have some advice for her—even if she claimed the “fairies” had given it to her—or maybe not, but at least the visit would take Sadie’s mind off of Shawn’s…whatever it was.
“There you are, girl!” Jaclyn’s sudden appearance in the doorway startled Sadie. “We’ve been waiting for you. It’s almost dinner time, you know. He wanted to head over to the restaurant, but I made him wait. Knew you’d be by, didn’t I?”
Sadie blinked in confusion—sometimes it seemed like Jaclyn could carry on a whole conversation all by herself—and tried to peer through the doorway. “Who wanted to head to dinner, Jaclyn?” Hopefully not her gnomes.
“Simon, of course!” The old woman stepped out of the way and gestured her inside. “Quick, before the heat and the bunnies escape. Cute things don’t have the sense to come in out of the cold, but you do.” She turned and bustled towards her sitting room, so Sadie shut the door and followed.
At least she didn’t have to worry about the mysterious “him.” Simon was a long-time employee at the ranch’s pro shop, a charming old man who held more than a little torch for the eccentric gray-haired woman. They were best friends, and Sadie had long ago stopped speculating about their private life.
Simon was sitting impatiently on a recliner, covered in bunnies, when they came into the room. “There you are!” His welcome echoed Jaclyn’s. “I’m starved. Did you bring the ice cream Jaclyn’s fairies told her you were bringing?”
Sadie glanced at the other woman—who just smiled serenely—and then shrugged and handed the container to Simon. The man made an eager noise and sat up, dislodging several rabbits in the process, and grabbed for the spoon and the lid.
“Simon likes your ice cream as much as I do, Sadie.”
Sadie smiled weakly at the compliment, but watched the man’s face as he took the first bite. The way his nose wrinkled didn’t look like he enjoyed the ice cream. In fact, after the second bite, he stabbed the spoon down into the dessert in disgust. “Normally I do, but this is nowhere near your usual efforts.”
When he held out the container to Jaclyn, she took it without looking, then spooned a big bite into her own mouth. She stared at the ceiling while she chewed and swallowed, and Sadie watched anxiously for some response.
Finally, Jaclyn nodded firmly and gestured towards the couch with the spoon. “Sit down, girl, and tell me why you’re so troubled. I mean, this ice cream is terrible, which means something’s really bothering you.”
Sighing, Sadie accepted the invitation. They were right; there was something off about this batch of Berry-Berry, and she suspected it had to do with her current emotional turmoil. Jaclyn was a friend though, and could be relied upon to offer some good advice. And maybe Simon had some insight too.
“Shawn…kissed me.”
Judging from the sudden laugh and the way she slapped her knee, Jaclyn knew exactly who Sadie meant. The older woman quickly filled in Simon when he asked “Who’s Shawn?”
But then Jaclyn turned to Sadie and prompted, “And? I’ve seen the chemistry between the two of you, so I know you didn’t mind locking lips with him one bit. So why the long face?”
Sadie found herself pour
ing out the whole story, about how they’d shared something magical, and Shawn had made her feel like he might like her for her, and then his stupid announcement. “He’s talking about backing out of the contest for me, when I should be the one to back out. How could he kiss me—say that he cares about me!—and then announce that he’s going to give up his chance to stay at the ranch? Violet needs stability.” She suddenly felt drained. “And I need them.”
Jaclyn, who hadn’t said anything during Sadie’s story, reached over and patted her hand. “That boy always did have more honor than he knew what to do with.”
Sadie nodded mutely. Honor. That was Shawn’s problem. He was doing something stupid and honorable, when the smart thing was just the opposite.
But her friend continued. “Shawn McAllister is carrying around all sorts of guilt from all sorts of things, Sadie. You’ll have to trust the fairies on this. I’m sure he thinks that by backing out of this contest, he’s doing the honorable thing for once, but he doesn’t realize he’s done plenty of honorable things in the past, and this time he needs to do something selfish. Staying here at the ranch is right for Violet, of course, but he’s too afraid of doing what’s right for him to see that.”
Sadie eyed the bunnies gathered around the container of melting ice cream. At least they seemed to like it. “Afraid of doing what’s right for him?” she repeated.
Jaclyn gave Sadie’s hand one last, firm pat. “You’re not the only one dragging around suitcases, girl.”
That was odd enough to pull Sadie’s attention back to the other woman. “Suitcases?”
Simon snorted, the first noise he’d made since the aborted ice cream attempt. “Baggage, you silly woman.” He corrected Jaclyn, then smiled at Sadie. “She means you’re both carrying around emotional baggage, probably about past relationships or something.”
Jaclyn pointed a long finger at Simon and grinned. “You’re not so bad at this. Want to take over the relationship advice?”
Simon shrugged. “Sure, although I don’t have any insider information from the fairies.” He smiled smugly and sat back in the recliner, crossing one leg over the other. “The way I see it, is Shawn has convinced himself the honorable thing is to let you win. But he’s just using that as an excuse to run away from his feelings for you, because of whatever’s happened in the past. His suitcases, if you will.”
Sadie nodded again, smiling a little at how much Simon sounded like one of those psychologists on TV. But what he was saying made sense. She didn’t know Shawn’s past, other than the tantalizing glimpses he’s given her, but she knew he was divorced. Was that the reason that he was running away? Or did he truly believe that backing out of the contest was the best thing for all of them? Did he truly believe that leaving the ranch was the solution?
“So what do I do?”
“It’s obvious, girl.” Simon and Jaclyn spoke at the exact same time, and when they realized it, all three of them broke into laughter.
Jaclyn gestured to her friend. “Please, enlighten us.”
Simon grinned smugly. “Compete together, instead of against each other.”
Blinking, Sadie sat up straighter. “What?”
“Together, you’re a much stronger entry than apart,” Jaclyn stood up. “You two would be a shoe-in for the contest, and then you could win it together.”
“You’re right,” Sadie breathed, staring at the bunnies, but not really seeing them. “You’re right.”
“Of course I’m right.” Jaclyn snapped good-naturedly. “Simon hasn’t taken over my role of being always right, has he? Just because he’s figured out how to give some good advice every once in a blue moon.”
The old man pretended to grumble as he pulled himself out of the recliner, but Jaclyn ignored him, and said to Sadie, “Now, get out of my house so we can go eat.”
Sadie smiled, then stood to hug them both. Her mind was already whirling with ideas. “Thank you both.”
“Yes, yes, we’re wonderful.” Jaclyn shooed her towards the front door. “Now go tell him whatever’s got your little brain spinning, and leave us old folk to not starve.”
“I’m thinking pot roast.” Simon was reaching for his coat already. “But you’re going to want something with chicken, aren’t you?”
“It’s Monday, isn’t it?” Jaclyn snapped back, and Sadie smiled. Those two belonged together.
Just like she and Shawn belonged together.
She bolted out the door.
Shawn was sharing another silent dinner of microwaved hotdogs and beans with his sullen daughter, when the pounding on the RV’s door started. Two sets of identical green eyes widened, but he put down his dinner when the latch began to rattle.
When he stood and pulled open the door, his breath caught in his throat. Not because of the cold, but because of Sadie. She was standing with one foot already on the step, the light from their kitchen area illuminating her upturned face, and all Shawn could think about was the feel of those plump lips on his.
She was…she was perfect. Perfect for him, but he couldn’t have her, because he was leaving. But she wasn’t wearing the look of a desperate woman, or an angry one, the way he’d expected her to be after he’d kissed her then basically told her he was resigned to leaving. No, she looked…hopeful.
“Daddy?” Violet asked from the dinette, and Shawn shook his head once to clear it.
“Come in,” he stepped back to let Sadie in. Maybe it was a bad idea, her coming here. Maybe having her here now would just make it more painful to say goodbye at the end of the semester. But he couldn’t not see her…and it was cold out.
As soon as his daughter saw her new friend, she squealed and threw herself into Sadie’s arms. For her part, the woman hugged Violet as if she’d genuinely missed the girl, and even dropped a kiss on the brown ponytail. Shawn’s heart tightened at the sight of the embrace, and he turned away, towards the kitchen counter.
“Do you want dinner?” he asked, his voice gruff.
There was a moment of stillness behind him, but then he heard, “No, thank you.”
“Miss Sadie, did you bring me another book?”
“What? Why?” Sadie let out a teasing groan. “Did you finish number three already?”
“This afternoon! But I figured I’d re-read my favorite parts until I could come get number four from you.”
He turned in time to see the two ladies he loved smiling at one another, and felt lightheaded. Why? Oh yeah, he’d forgotten to breathe. Seeing his daughter and Sadie together like that, obviously both sincere in their affections, was everything he’d ever dreamed of and dreaded.
He and Violet had done well enough on their own for years, and he hadn’t been able to afford any kind of relationship—emotionally or financially. But a friendship? Yeah, that had seemed harmless…at first. But Sadie had become a part of their lives now, and it was going to hurt all of them so darn much when he ripped her out and moved on.
But it was for the best. By giving up his spot in the contest, he could make sure she had a much better chance at winning and fulfilling her dreams for her shop. He’d spent the day composing a letter to the Chamber of Commerce committee and talking with Jace about the decision. Jace hadn’t said it aloud, but clearly thought Shawn was an idiot for giving up his spot, and losing such a valuable chance at publicity to make the summer camps a success.
But there was always a hope the summer camps might succeed without the added publicity. They might get enough kids enrolled by the spring to make sure he’d still have a job come summer. There was always hope.
Sadie and his daughter had been chatting back and forth about the Nancy Drew books, but now she looked up and met his eyes. He forgot he was supposed to be breathing normally again, dangit.
“I came to see you, Shawn.” There was hope in her expression. Why? “I had an idea.”
“Yeah?” He winced at his own harshness, and hated the way Violet’s expression fell at his tone. “I mean” —he cleared his throat— “abou
t what?”
“About the contest.”
He glanced at his daughter. “Maybe we should talk some other time.”
“Actually…” Sadie lifted her chin and tightened her hold on the girl’s shoulders. “My idea involves Violet.”
Shawn’s eyes narrowed slightly. She wasn’t going to use Violet; he knew her better than that. But… “What does Violet have to do with the contest?”
Sadie took a deep breath, and Shawn pretended not to notice the way her chest pressed against the wool of her coat. “Can we sit down and discuss it?”
When he nodded, all three of them sat in the dinette, in the same positions they’d been in last week when she’d come for dinner. Sadie unbuttoned her jacket and shrugged out of it.
Then she smiled. And man! That woman could light up a room when she smiled. “I don’t want you to back out of the contest, Shawn. I think your program is really deserving of the cash prize and the publicity. I’d back out myself, just to give you that opportunity.”
He opened his mouth to tell her that his mind was made up, but she just held up a hand and smiled again. “But that would be all Gift of the Magi, which would be silly.”
His jaw snapped shut. He understood her reference to O. Henry’s classic short story, but wasn’t exactly sure how it applied.
“Besides,” Sadie shrugged, “I don’t think I have to.” She glanced at Violet once, and they shared a secret smile. Had they conspired, or did they just trust one another? Sadie planted her elbows on the table and leaned in. “I want us to team up. To join forces.”
Violet gasped and clapped her hands twice. “Yes! That way you can win together!”
Nodding, Sadie agreed. “When we win, the summer camps can take the money prize and I’ll take the carousel, and we can split the publicity among all of what River’s End Ranch can offer guests, meaning we’ll all benefit.”
Stunned, Shawn sat back in the booth. It was a deceptively simple scheme. But how would it work? He was already shaking his head when he asked, “What would we do? I assumed that you were going to wow the committee with your drinks and desserts. I was just going to sit them down and explain to them the benefits of the camps on the community of Riston. The theme is The Spirit of Riston, after all. I don’t know how we could possibly appeal to them, if we mashed those two ideas together. I mean, summer camps and coffee…?”